Fire and Ice

Madison. 23. Gemini. Here to put the bi in bitch writing blog @strokes-of-decent aesthetic blog @fireheart-aesthetic

[jewishevelinebaker]

Its always "why is this mom selling her daughter" and never "why is one direction buying a person" smh

[incorrectdisasterlineage]

anakin: we need to get through this locked door. obi-wan, give me your credit card. 

obi-wan: here. 

anakin, pocketing it: thanks. ahsoka, kick down the door.

[see]

barbie official: we’re gonna put all our movies on youtube for free!

youtube, still selling their movies: huh? what’d they say they were going to do?

here’s a link to a playlist since everyone’s a fan of this post

[not-the-real-norbert-hofer]

WHAT

[not-the-real-norbert-hofer]

it’s real😭😭😭😭😭😭

[evangelimes17]

Okay the link is kinda busted so here (hopefully) is a better one:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAn0QpwDUCtIa_EkTetZoaA

Barbie Official Movies

[aw3zom3zauc3]

ISLAND PRINCESS

[b0n3-daddy]

@consciously-corvidic

[quasarkisses]

RED ALERT GO WATCH BARBIE IN THE NUTCRACKER RIGHT THE FUCK NOW

[sandandglass]

[boss-hoody]

Was he just born ripped as fuck or something?

[garykingoftheworld-deactivated2]

This is his father.

It’s quite possible Rock was indeed born ripped as fuck.

[ad-hominem-sappies-deactivated2]

Dwayne Johnson comes from a even bigger rock

[kabber]

The Boulder Johnson

[funny-tik-toks]

[ko-is-an-insomniac]

Cain and Abel

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[oh2e]

[frogconnoisseur-remade-deactiva]

[lurkingscientist]

[sartorialadventure]

Krikor Jabotian, spring 2014

[2u3u1u2002dotcom-deactivated202]

having adhd is like im so tired of music. im so tired of sleeping. every day i decide what to eat for dinner

[2u3u1u2002dotcom-deactivated202]

only people with adhd will understansd this post

[mxbutchtwink]

The entire gay fashion spectrum:

Floral button up

I might be a vampire, who knows?

Too much jewelry

I am insecure about my body :)

Ken/Polly Pocket incarnate

I walked right out of the set of an 80’s sitcom

Shaved eyebrow slit

[eatpizzas]

[mxbutchtwink]

The entire gay fashion spectrum:

Floral button up

I might be a vampire, who knows?

Too much jewelry

I am insecure about my body :)

Ken/Polly Pocket incarnate

I walked right out of the set of an 80’s sitcom

Shaved eyebrow slit

[peachpiefuckingangeldeath-deact]

girl…

[naik2seki]

who she fuck? shrek?????

[rosaryemoji]

Bryson I’m gonna slap u for making me read all of this

[henryclervals]

bisexuals will see someone in period clothes and be like yes

[babyanimalgifs]

This cute platypus 

(via)

[big-ass-magnet]

I fully understand why westerners thought the platypus was a hoax at first. I’m looking at a real live one moving around and it STILL looks fake.

[bogleech]

The one thing that could have made them sound any more made up would have been if you said the boys have secret viper fangs that can absolutely fuck you up with venom, and they do, on their goddamn feet.

[special-lucky-chosen-one]

cursed platypus facts: * five (5) X chromosomes * only the left ovary works * produces milk but has no nipples. the mother just kind of sweats milk out their chest. nature is beautiful * was nearly called the “duckmole” * swims with its weird fish eyes and ears closed, hunting entirely by electroreception * born with teeth, but then they fall out

[insomniac-arrest]

finding out that almost all other animals don’t have periods like we do and instead simply reabsorb the egg back into their uterine lining to reuse the nutrients is like finding out the rest of the class has been taking WILDLY easier tests than you for the whole semester

like, hey, cat why don’t you have to use your Cat Dollars to invest in tampons? And cat is just like: fuck that noise, my body is OPTIMAL for not being made of inconvenient nonsense, sucks to be you

wack.

[insomniac-arrest]

humans: hey, bleeding every month is actually really cumbersome and I lose both valuable nutrients AND fluids I need for survival? What the fuck is up?

evolution: yes, alright, but have you considered this about it? *cartoon blow horn noise* 

[what-even-is-thiss]

Human bodies suck for many reasons including but not limited to:

Periods

Bad backs

Permanent breasts that do not leave once baby is weaned

Dangerously large, unprotected, and non retractable male reproductive systems

Huge brain takes up way too much energy gotta eat more sleep less

Baby brain bigger than hips guess birth is life threatening now

Takes like 25 years for big brain to even finish maturing

[durzio]

•Teeth are critical to living, yet not designed to last more than a few years without constant intervention and upkeep, and don’t grow back if this is not accomplished. Also, losing your teeth means the bones in your ear will shift, and your hearing will worsen.

•Breathing, eating, communication all from the same pathway, major choking hazard. Give me a dolphin style breathing tube.

•Most pleasurable nerve endings on the body locating on the filthiest parts of you, guarenteed spread of bacteria.

•knees and shoulders have almost zero capability to heal correctly, once they break, they’re basically broken forever without massive outside influence.

[larariumluparum]

truer words

[47414941]