todays bird

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
sheepfilms
will byers stan first human second
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
d e v o n

@theartofmadeline
Keni

blake kathryn
almost home
taylor price
Game of Thrones Daily
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Mike Driver
One Nice Bug Per Day

#extradirty

shark vs the universe

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@justimm
we're just kids
THEY HAVE TAKEN YOU FROM THE IMPERIAL CITY’S PRISON
FIRST BY CARRIAGE AND NOW BY BOAT,
TO THE EAST TO MORROWIND.
FEAR NOT, FOR I AM WATCHFUL
YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN.
TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!
WHAT THE FUCK IT’S CHRISTMAS EVE WHY DID SOMEONE REBLOG THIS
TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!
TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!
🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃
TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!
🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃
TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN
me: [posting in the maid gc] yeah my lady screamed at me and threw bottles at my head cus i talked while she was reading her novellas again. any advice
maid 1: poison her
maid 2: yea poison her
maid 3: i have a connect on some really strong untraceable poisons if you want
me: girls she makes me try all of her food before she eats it how am i gonna poison her
maid 1: put it in her mouth while she sleeps
maid 2: ^this. worked like a charm for my sister
maid 3: yeah dm me i have a bunch of techniques that might work
maid 4: have you tried seducing her? maybe she just needs to have her heart warmed so she may show you the kindness you deserve
maid 2: MARY
maid 1: cmon mary
maid 3: just because YOUR lady has sex with you doesn't mean everyone's lady does
me: no wait she does like to put her fingers in my mouth to check if i swallowed her food. and i'm pretty sure she squeezed my ass once
maid 4: yeah exactly. message me i can tell yoy more
maid 3: whatever. if you need the poison just hit me up
maid 5: girls do you know how to get wine out of satin
maid 1: how recent is the spill
maid 5: a few days old
maid 2: you're fucked
crying
Uh....australian here. We don’t talk like that. At all. This shits closer to how white South Africans talk lmao
Uh...white south African here. Neither do we lol
uh... white person here. i jack off to goombas from the super mario bros games
Buneary Comic
Beatrice: Ohhhh...Battlerrrr....did you hear that Witches have figured out how to turn a sphere inside out...?
Battler: What's the big deal, then...? Isn't that easy? Just poke a hole through it!
Beatrice: But the point of it is to do it magically...! Using a sphere that cannot be pierced, creased or bent sharply.... but can pass through itself...!
Beatrice: If you say so, then try it, Battler!
Battler: Okay... here goes... I'll just pull the two halfs through eachother!
Beatrice: Watch out, Ushiromiya Battleeeer....! You're pinching it infinitely tight....!
Battler: Uwooooo! It's useless....! It's all useless....It is impossible to turn a sphere inside out...!!
Beatrice: Ohhhh...really...?
Battler: Is this it...a....sphere turning inside out...!? What the fuck!?
Beatrice: KYAHAHAHAHAHAHA....! I DID IT WITH MAGIC....! AHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAH *CACKLE*CACKLE*CACKLE*
"Gretel": ...Really? After being told it's magic once, you're not even going to try to think? It's like you don't even want to return home...
Battler: But, but... but! I really couldn't follow it at all! It's useless, it can't be anything but magic!
"Gretel": Pathetic... falling for her just because she's dazzling you with words? If it's too hard to follow, simplify the problem...
[OST: Core]
Battler: A... a circle?
"Gretel": That's right, a circle. It's a 2D simplification of her 3D "trick"... so it should be much simpler to explain, right? Think it's possible to flip it around?
Battler: ...Ggh! How should I know!? And even if it is... how the hell would that prove it's possible in 3D!?
"Gretel": Hm... yeah, maybe it won't. But... don't you think it'll be useful to consider anyway...? It's like giving yourself ammunition for the full argument, right?
"Gretel": Anyway, flip your thinking around for a second... the useful fact here is that it's not possible in 2D.
Battler: The hell!? Ugh, that's useless, totally useless... no good at all...!
my ethical way of being a vampire: I basically specifically kill/bite the people I want to because I don’t like them or feel like it and I’m always right because I’m smart