‹𝟹 i will only write for &team and x reader fics. My reqs are currently not open but feel free to interact!
‹𝟹 will not write male reader, pegging, member x member, minor, ddlg, daddy kink, mommy kink, age play, race play, anything too extreme is a no!
‹𝟹 basic dni, mdni, rude people
‹𝟹 my DMs are always open so please don’t be afraid to message me! I like making new friends but I’m shy and suck at talking to people :))
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contains: angst, jaafar lwk being stupid, mentions of maddie, cliffhanger 👀.
a/n: this is my first time ever writing a fanfic— enjoy :3 !!
there’s something cruel about loving someone that the entire world believed belonged to somebody else.
maybe it would hurt less if you met him after the fame - if he was just another celebrity whose smile you adored from the screen.
you knew jaafar jackson long before the press; before the interviews and the headlines; before the cameras, and the autographs.
you knew the boy who carelessly scraped his knees while playing with his family in his grandparents backyard - the teenager who loved to golf, the man who reached for your hand every time there was no one watching.
that just made tonight even more unbearable.
“there she is.” someone from the jackson family excitedly called, waving at you.
you forced a smile and waved back.
A chorus of congratulations floated across the room. glasses of champagne clinking together as the sound of shuttering cameras fills empty space.
at the center, jaafar stood with one arm wrapped his fiancé, maddie. the diamond on her finger dancing in the light before your eyes found his.
he looked at you only for a second. a second long enough for you to see it.
the hint of regret.
then, he smiled for more pictures.
“aren’t they so beautiful together?” a question snapping you out of your daze.
“they really are,” you smiled.
**divider**
as the night went on, you slipped outside with hopes of going unnoticed.
you spent the past few hours smiling until your cheeks ached and hugging relatives of the man who whispered, “i love you” into your ear less than twenty-four hours ago.
you tried to convince yourself that you were happy for him. you wanted to be.
as if on cue, you heard the sound of faint footsteps falling behind you.
“i’ve been looking for you.”
you didn’t have to turn around to know who it was. you could recognize that voice from anywhere.
“congratulations,” you say, trying to hide your bitter tone.
there was a beat of silence before he replied, “thank you.”
silence settled between the two of you as you kept your back turned, eyes fixed on the backyard. you refused to look at him.
“was today always the plan?”
he walked up to you, standing beside you now, “what?”
“the proposal,” your voice barely rose above a whisper. “was that always the plan?”
another beat of silence, followed by a quiet, “yes.”
you nodded slowly.
“So,” you trailed off, “yesterday, when you told me you loved me, you already had the ring?” you swallowed the lump forming in your throat.
“it doesn’t change anything,” he whispered.
you stared at him in disbelief, “seriously? nothing’s changed?”
“i’m still here, aren’t i,” he asked softly, reaching out for your hands, “i came looking for you.”
a bitter laugh left your lips as you moved your hands away from his.
his brows furrowed in genuine confusion, “i don’t understand why you’re acting like this.”
your expression faltered, “you don’t understand?”
“i still love you,” he paused, “and i’m here.”
you shook your head, “that’s the problem, jaafar.”
“you still get me,” you continued, “you still get to come over whenever you want. you still get to tell me you love me. you still get to kiss me.”
silence.
“but now, she gets everything else.”
he opened his mouth, but you didn’t let him speak.
“she gets to hold your hand in public and wear your ring. she gets to stand beside you in every interview. she gets to smile in pictures while everyone calls her ‘mrs. jackson’,” you scoff before continuing, “and i get whatever’s left after the cameras stop rolling.”
“that’s not what this is,” he diffident declared.
You challenged, “no?” furrowing your brows, you feel yourself getting more frustrated.
“then tell me what it is.” you blinked back the sting in your eyes, “when reporters ask who you’re marrying, and your family starts planning the wedding, where do i fit into that?”
he held your gaze, “you act like you lost me.”
“i did.”
a crease formed between his brows as he took another step closer.
“i’m standing right here.”
“i’m not talking about tonight.”
silence settled between the two of you.
“i don’t know what you want me to say,” he glances at his loafers with bated breath, waiting for your next words.
a bitter smile tugged at your lips, “i don’t want you to say anything.”
he searched your face for a moment as if the answer would be etched into your features.
“then what do you want?”
you felt that all too familiar lump form in your throat as you looked past him, into the open doors, where laughter spilled into the night and cameras continued to flash.
warnings: comfort!! period, mentions of cramps and being in pain
a/n: this one's completely self indulgent bcs i am HURTING as i'm typing this. i hate periods with a passion guys.
yuma realized something wasn't right the second he woke up — sleepy eyes half open, eyelids fighting a tough war as he struggled not to close them again. and yet despite sleep calling out for him to come back, there was something that stopped him from doing so. an absence which filled him with great unease.
your side of the bed was empty and cold, only a dent in the mattress from where you previously laid remaining. normally it wouldn't surprise him that much — often times you were the one to wake up earlier than him, ready for the day before he even managed to open his eyes, before he moved an inch from underneath the covers. and yet, even to that rule there were exceptions, mostly happening when the two of you had a day off to yourselves or a weekend to enjoy.
today was one of those days — and yet yuma didn't feel the warmth of your body against his upon waking up, the comforting touch of your hands. and he knew that it could only mean one thing.
you were on your period.
the thought crossed yuma's mind immediately: the lower mood you've been in these past few days, your complaints about not feeling well. at first he assumed you were coming down with some sort of sickness, only to realize that it's been a few weeks since you've last complained to him about your monthly bleeding.
he left the bed, movements slow as he rubbed his eyes with both of his hands, footsteps leading him towards where he assumed you were — the bathroom. his sweatpants hung low on his waist, the waistband of his boxers peeking from underneath as he knocked on the door ever so gently, waiting for a response. he knocked again after a few seconds; a little louder this time, hearing you mumble something from the inside. he took it as a sign to go inside.
yuma opened the door slowly, the door making a small creek sound as he did so. he peeked his head first — curious eyes catching a glimpse of you inside the bathroom, his face immediately falling.
you were laying on the floor, curled up into a ball as your face contorted in an expression full of pain. your cheeks were stained with tears as you sobbed quietly, hands crossed around your stomach.
'oh, sweetheart.' yuma mumbled quietly, kneeling down next to you. his hands immediately found their way to your shoulders — massaging them gently with a comforting touch. 'is it the cramps again?'
you could only nod in response, not moving from your current position.
'did you take painkillers?' yuma asked. you nodded again. 'they didn't start working yet, did they?'
another nod.
yuma hummed quietly, thinking to himself for a minute.
'do you want to get back to bed?' he asked, voice quiet and soothing. 'i could carry you.'
this time, you shook your head in response — yuma's brows furrowing in slight confusion.
'the tiles are cold.' you mumbled quietly, voice barely audible as you remained in your curled up state, a small sob escaping your lips. 'it feels nice.'
yuma smiled at your words — eyes filled with adoration and worry, hands drawing gentle patterns along the exposed parts of your back, ones your tank top didn't cover. he wasn't going to leave you there waiting for the painkillers to start working; opting instead to lay down next to u, body encaging yours in a big, comforting hug, the warm sensation of his skin against yours providing a nice contrast to the cold bathroom tiles. although you didn't move or change your position, your body eased into his touch almost on instinct — muscles loosening and almost melting in his hold.
'the medicine will work soon, i promise.' he whispered, leaning in to plant a soft kiss to your cheek. 'i'll lay here with you till it passes, okay?'
he noticed the way your lips curved up just slightly, a weak smile appearing on your lips at his words.
'thank you.' you murmured, hand finding his in slow movements. 'i love you.'
'i love you too, sweetheart.' he said, planting another kiss to your temple. 'let's spend today in bed, hm? just us, cuddles, a movie and snacks. i have your favorite ones stored away for occasions like these.'
you squeezed his hand gently, nodding in response.
'can we order food, too?' you asked.
'of course.' yuma chuckled, head nuzzling in the crook of your neck. 'you can choose what we eat, too. as long as it doesn't hurt your stomach.'
he planted yet another kiss, this time to your neck, then another one to your shoulder. and with the soothing touch and comforting presence of yuma absorbing you from all around, you seemed to almost forget about the pain still building up in your lower stomach — letting yourself enjoy the moment as you focused on your boyfriend and just how lucky you were to have him.
'you're the best.' you mumbled quietly, closing your eyes as your back rested against his chest. yuma smiled.
yay new mootie🤤🤤lowkey followed you because saw you participating in the 3 animal moot game and thought you were really cool👩❤️💋👩👩❤️💋👩👩❤️💋👩 #youarecool #spreadpositiveenergy #letsgo #iloveredpandas #thisisawkward
AWWWE HIHI MOOTIE!!! You’re so so sweet!! I hope you’re doing well. You seem so cool too <33 welcome to my blog I hope you enjoy your stay cutie!!!! I leave you with three kisses mwah
Every staff member at Big Suki café has a reason to come to work every day…except for y/n. That is until a new, handsome face amongst the regulars appears one day, leading her to almost beg for shifts just to catch a glimpse of him once again.
★ fluff, crack, suggestive content
Taglist open☆〜
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CH. 14 LUCKY Y/N
author's note: sorry this took forever i will post next ch tomorrow <3 finally on holidays so i can just chill and write lol. also yay boyfriend k!
a/n: wow… it’s been a minute since I’ve posted. I’ve been suffering from writers block HEAVILY. This is a repurposed fic so if you recognize it a little that’s why, I did change some of it tho.
tags: MDNI, SMUT, Maki x f!reader, established relationship, cunnilingus, oral(f!receiving), fingering, kissing, soft maki, MUNCH MAKI, MAKI IS SO IN LOVE WITH READER
wc: 715
You looked absolutely divine beneath Maki—hair splayed out on the pillow, body bare and vulnerable as his lips moved gently across your soft skin. Each kiss lingers, leaving a trail of warmth behind as he moves down, paying extra attention to any blemishes or freckles in his path.
Maki’s lips press against your belly, mumbling soft words against the skin. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, each word punctuated by another kiss. In Maki's eyes, you were absolutely perfect. Everything about you he couldn’t get enough of.
Taking his time with you, listening for the changes in your breathing as he moves further down, notices the way your hips shift up subtly. He relishes the way your fingers grip his hair lightly, trying to push his head down to where you need him most. Pressing his palms against your thighs, he spreads them open wide enough to bring his head between them.
The kisses begin anew, lips pressing close to your heat where you’re aching for him. He sucks a light mark near the crease of your thight
Before he finally presses his mouth to your dripping cunt, licking a long stripe up your folds that has you gasping. Maki groans, savoring the taste of you as he flicks his tongue against your clit. “Maki,” hips bucking, chasing his tongue against your core. Maki wraps his hand around your thigh, tugging you closer so he can effectively bury his face between your plush thighs.
“You taste so good, baby.” He murmurs against your skin, muffled. The noises are obscene, loud slurps as he latches his mouth around your clit. His finger drags through your slick, teasing your cunt before pushing in. Walls clenching around his finger, thighs trembling as you try to squeeze them shut. Curling his finger, he finds that sensitive spot, causing you to moan out his name, desperate and high. “Nghh— fuck!“
Your fingers tug at his hair, head falling back against the pillows with your back arching—moaning unashamed as he slips a second finger into you. Maki sets up a good pace, alternating between short flicks of his tongue and long strokes while he steadily pumps his fingers into you. Your walls flutter around his digits, hips rolling to meet him halfway. Slick drips down his chin in messy rivulets but not even the mess can deter Maki.
Heat pooled in your belly and Maki noticed the moment your thighs tensed—how your breathing grew sharp and rapid, chest heaving. His eyes trailed up your body until they landed on your face and he watched you. Maki was utterly entranced by the way your brows furrowed, how your head was thrown back against the pillows, and by the soft whines spilling from your lips.
It was hard to believe that he caused this sight, that only he could see this beautifully crafted image of you.
Your hands scrambled to grip the pillow, his fingers curling just right against that sweet spot that has you seeing stars. “Maki— Maki, I’m so— “Your words die on your tongue, hips rolling as he sucks hard on your clit and that heat finally washes over you. Maki lets go of your thigh, groaning as they clamp down around his head. Your cunt clenches down on his fingers, slick gushing around them as you cum—body trembling.
Maki’s gaze never leaves your face, working you through your high as you tremble and squirm. His tongue licks up your folds, lapping up your release, only stopping when your heel kicks at his shoulder. He pulls away—breathing hard, chin glistening with combined slick and spit. “You did so well for me, baby.”
“Looked so gorgeous,” Hand moving to cradle the back of your neck as he slots his lips to yours, letting you taste yourself on his lips. You moan, arms winding around his broad shoulders to pull him closer, tongue swiping across your bottom lip as he pulls back.
You can feel the hard, insistent bulge straining against his sweats, pressing into your thigh. It’s a wonder how he’s even held back for so long. Winding your hand down between your two bodies, you press your palm against it, biting back a smile when he sucks in a shaky breath. “Let me take care of you now?”
a/n: finally writing a fic for Euijoo.. crazy how he’s my ult bias and I’m only just now writing for him. Tysm to @smidare for the name suggestion <3
tags: SMUT, MDNI, Euijoo x f!reader, oral (m!receiving), cum swallowing, kissing, making out, fingering, lotus postion(my beloved), p in v, unprotected sex(don’t do it), cumming inside(also do not do it), veryyyy soft Euijoo, Euijoo uses angel as pet name
wc: 1.3k or 1,352
Euijoo lies on the bed—one hand pressed against the mattress to hold himself upright while the other presses against your head. You sit between his legs, mouth close to his flushed, leaking cock.
Your tongue presses flat against the underside of Euijoo’s cock, tracing the throbbing vein with ease. “Ngh— fuck,” he curses under his breath, head tilted back, hand buried in your hair. He doesn’t push you, he never does.
His cock is heavy on your tongue, precum steadily leaking from the tip before your tongue swipes it away. Euijoo lifts his hips, feeding the tip of his cock into your mouth that you greedily wrap your lips around with a low moan. Heat pools between your legs—wetness already seeping through your panties with your thighs clenching together to control the ache.
Eyes half-lidded, gaze focused up on his face. Saliva coats his shaft and your lips, making the glide easier as you take another inch into your mouth. You hum around him, hands moving to rest on his thighs, the muscles flexing beneath your touch. Euijoo groans, digging his teeth into his bottom lip.
“Just— Just like that, angel.” Bobbing your head slowly, you gradually take more and more of him into your mouth. Your tongue slides against the shaft as you finally reach the base, gagging softly around him. “Easy,” Euijoo reminds you softly, fingers threading through your hair.
The ache between your legs is simply too much. Pressing a hand between your legs, your fingers easily find your clit through the damp fabric. Two fingers press against the sensitive nub, rubbing circles against it that have you squirming and whining around his cock.
Pulling back for only a moment, you catch your breath before diving back in. Euijoo moans, hips twitching as you take him to the base again. His chest is heaving—breath ragged, teeth clenched together, eyes screwing shut. It’s embarrassing how quickly he’s already nearing the edge but your mouth is simply too hot, too wet and too good around him. He can’t help it.
“Hah— fuck, angel, m’gonna cum,” He hisses out through his teeth, his fingers tightening a fraction in your hair. Tongue swirling around the shaft before you pull up, keeping just the tip within your lips. You suckle on the tip, free hand wrapping around the shaft to pump it, spit making the motion easy.
Euijoo’s stomach tenses, a guttural groan escaping his throat as his cock twitches in your mouth. Cum fills your mouth, throat working to swallow his load. Pulling off with a lewd, wet pop, your tongue licks up his cock, cleaning off any excess release. “Euijoo,” you whine, fingers still circling your throbbing clit, “Need you so bad.”
Euijoo shifts on the bed, sitting up and pulling his legs up until they’re crossed together. “C’mere, angel.” You're quick to shimmy your panties down your thighs. His hands are already cupping your cheeks when you’re done, lips pressing against yours as you crawl forward. You plant yourself in his lap, wrapping your legs around his waist, arms tangling with his.
His lips are soft against yours, gentle and sweet. Euijoo’s hand travels around to your back, fingers unhooking your bra strap with ease. Then his fingers find the straps, pushing them slowly off your shoulders until it comes off. He gathers the fabric in his hand, tossing it off the side of the bed.
Euijoo’s hand caresses your side, sliding up until his warm palm cups your breast. You moan softly against his lips, your tongues twining together as he rolls your nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Hand finding its way to the back of his neck, your fingers thread through his hair—pulling him into you.
Euijoo’s cock is steadily hardening again, the flushed shaft hot and heavy against your thigh. His hand leaves your breast, fingers ghosting over your skin, down until he reaches the heat between your legs. Your cunt aches, slick messily coating his fingers as he presses two into you. “Oh! Juju,” your words are muffled by his lips on yours. Both needing to catch your breaths but neither willing to pull away.
Curling his fingers, he pumps them steadily into your cunt, palm grinding against your clit. The double stimulation has your hips bucking into his hand. Euijoo takes his time prepping you. Fingers spreading, scissoring you open, hooking just right against that gummy spot that has you trembling before he slides them out.
Slick clings to his fingers, wiping the excess off onto his cock. Euijoo guides the leaking tip to your cunt, sliding the head through your folds, both of you moaning at the contact. Finally, he presses the head in. Your nails dig into the nape of his neck, leaving half-moon shaped indents. The stretch stings as he sinks into you, cock filling you up perfectly.
“My pretty girl, taking me so well,” he says through gritted teeth, arms wrapping tight around your body to hold you close against him. Your walls clench around him, warm and wet and too fucking good. By the time his cock is buried inside you, you’re both trembling in a tangle of limbs, both whining at any movement.
Your hips stuttered, grinding down against his cock, breath hitching. The tip nudged just right against your sweet spot, grinding against it each time you rocked your hips. “Oh— feels so good, juju, so good.” One of his hands slides down to your hip, splaying his hand across the skin, rocking your hips back and forth.
Euijoo’s gaze is on your face, taking in every detail. He watches as your brows knit together in pleasure, how your eyelashes flutter against your cheeks. Your cheeks are flushed red, your lips a bit swollen from kissing. The whimpers that escape you are soft. “That’s it, just like that, angel.” He rocks his hips up as best as he can, meeting each of your grinds down.
Your clit presses perfectly against him, dragging over his pelvis with each pass. Slick dribbles messily between you, coating you both in a sticky mess. “Doing so good for me.” Euijoo’s lips press gently on your shoulder, ghosting over the skin and up to your neck. His arm is locked around your waist, your body flush against his.
Each roll presses him deeper, both of you panting against the other's skin, holding on tight to one another. Sweat slicks your skin, hands slipping down to his back. You’re both tensing, bodies in sync with pleasure as he keeps rocking into you, grinding you down against his cock. Heat pools in your belly, his cock twitching deep against your walls.
“M’so close, Euijoo,” lips brushing against his as you lean in—foreheads pressing against each other, breath mingling. “Euijoo— juju, oh god,” your nails dig into his skin again, legs squeezing around his waist. Your clit drags against his pelvis once more, his cock pressing just right and your cumming.
Euijoo holds you close, rocking into you to ride your high out as he chases his own release. Your walls flutter tight around him, milking him for all he’s worth. Groaning low, his cock twitches one more, spilling his release deep into your sensitive cunt, warmth filling you.
You go limp in Euijoo’s arms, shaking in them as he rubs his hands down your back. Your chests heave. Cupping your cheeks in his palms, Euijoo tilts your head up towards his. “Pretty girl,” he murmurs, voice wrecked but still gentle. He presses a kiss to your lips, then he’s trailing them all across your face. He kisses your jaw, cheeks, your temples, the tip of your nose and your eyelashes.
You completely melt into his touches. He murmurs praise behind each kiss, telling you how good you did for him, how you felt so good around him. “So perfect, angel.” Shifting carefully, his softening cock slips free, your combined release spilling messily down your thighs.
Euijoo leans back, pulling you with him as he lays back against the mattress with the promise of cleaning up later. Though you both know you’ll fall asleep within seconds.
a/n: wow… it’s been a minute since I’ve posted. I’ve been suffering from writers block HEAVILY. This is a repurposed fic so if you recognize it a little that’s why, I did change some of it tho.
tags: MDNI, SMUT, Maki x f!reader, established relationship, cunnilingus, oral(f!receiving), fingering, kissing, soft maki, MUNCH MAKI, MAKI IS SO IN LOVE WITH READER
wc: 715
You looked absolutely divine beneath Maki—hair splayed out on the pillow, body bare and vulnerable as his lips moved gently across your soft skin. Each kiss lingers, leaving a trail of warmth behind as he moves down, paying extra attention to any blemishes or freckles in his path.
Maki’s lips press against your belly, mumbling soft words against the skin. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, each word punctuated by another kiss. In Maki's eyes, you were absolutely perfect. Everything about you he couldn’t get enough of.
Taking his time with you, listening for the changes in your breathing as he moves further down, notices the way your hips shift up subtly. He relishes the way your fingers grip his hair lightly, trying to push his head down to where you need him most. Pressing his palms against your thighs, he spreads them open wide enough to bring his head between them.
The kisses begin anew, lips pressing close to your heat where you’re aching for him. He sucks a light mark near the crease of your thight
Before he finally presses his mouth to your dripping cunt, licking a long stripe up your folds that has you gasping. Maki groans, savoring the taste of you as he flicks his tongue against your clit. “Maki,” hips bucking, chasing his tongue against your core. Maki wraps his hand around your thigh, tugging you closer so he can effectively bury his face between your plush thighs.
“You taste so good, baby.” He murmurs against your skin, muffled. The noises are obscene, loud slurps as he latches his mouth around your clit. His finger drags through your slick, teasing your cunt before pushing in. Walls clenching around his finger, thighs trembling as you try to squeeze them shut. Curling his finger, he finds that sensitive spot, causing you to moan out his name, desperate and high. “Nghh— fuck!“
Your fingers tug at his hair, head falling back against the pillows with your back arching—moaning unashamed as he slips a second finger into you. Maki sets up a good pace, alternating between short flicks of his tongue and long strokes while he steadily pumps his fingers into you. Your walls flutter around his digits, hips rolling to meet him halfway. Slick drips down his chin in messy rivulets but not even the mess can deter Maki.
Heat pooled in your belly and Maki noticed the moment your thighs tensed—how your breathing grew sharp and rapid, chest heaving. His eyes trailed up your body until they landed on your face and he watched you. Maki was utterly entranced by the way your brows furrowed, how your head was thrown back against the pillows, and by the soft whines spilling from your lips.
It was hard to believe that he caused this sight, that only he could see this beautifully crafted image of you.
Your hands scrambled to grip the pillow, his fingers curling just right against that sweet spot that has you seeing stars. “Maki— Maki, I’m so— “Your words die on your tongue, hips rolling as he sucks hard on your clit and that heat finally washes over you. Maki lets go of your thigh, groaning as they clamp down around his head. Your cunt clenches down on his fingers, slick gushing around them as you cum—body trembling.
Maki’s gaze never leaves your face, working you through your high as you tremble and squirm. His tongue licks up your folds, lapping up your release, only stopping when your heel kicks at his shoulder. He pulls away—breathing hard, chin glistening with combined slick and spit. “You did so well for me, baby.”
“Looked so gorgeous,” Hand moving to cradle the back of your neck as he slots his lips to yours, letting you taste yourself on his lips. You moan, arms winding around his broad shoulders to pull him closer, tongue swiping across your bottom lip as he pulls back.
You can feel the hard, insistent bulge straining against his sweats, pressing into your thigh. It’s a wonder how he’s even held back for so long. Winding your hand down between your two bodies, you press your palm against it, biting back a smile when he sucks in a shaky breath. “Let me take care of you now?”
Currently working on repurposing an old fic of mine into a maki fic! It was published on an old account around a month ago but I no longer use that account <3 this fic will probably be shorter but I really want to get something outttt!
tyyy @mytwinsung for tagging me !! 🤍 (granted like a week ago...)
last song: sun has set - beabadoobee (I WON THE FREAKING TICKETMASTER)
currently watching: never ending summer, it's this c-drama that i keep seeing everywhere but i haven't watched it yet but i'm planning to soon :p
current obsession: photography 👀 i just love when my feed looks clean and aesthetic like it just makes me happy inside, sooo i've been experimenting with different digis
currently reading: re-reading the percy jackson series 😛 (I CANT WAIT FOR SEASON 3 AND FOR THE EPIC THE MUSICAL MOVIE)
currently working on: riki's part of lens unfocused... I'LL GET IT OUT SOON I SWEAR I'VE JUST BEEN SO BUSY 😭😭
currently wearing: a thin tank top and jorts because it's so FREAKING HOT. house slippers too ig
last google search: the weather... 💀 donno why i keep searching that when i KNOW theres a freaking heatwave everyday 💔💔
fav flower: magnolias ^^ they’re so big and pretty and they smell good and they look so delicate andand (or lilies for the same reasons lol)
✿ tagging: @noirellee @veorise @whiskimsy (im too shy to tag 10 people...)
currently watching : love island usa (I’m sorry ts is genuinely all i breathe)
current obsession : love island, and cinnamon holy shit someone stop me from adding cinnamon to everything also true crime documentaries for some reason.
currently working on : social circles ( i swear I’m writing it I’m SORRY💔💔)
currently wearing : sleepwear because it is time to SLEEP.
last google search : i hate this but John Wayne Gacy because i was watching the Netflix documentary about him today
currently watching : i dont watch anything rn!! i just cant find good series, so i keep rewatching the big bang theory😭 over and over and over and over again
current obsession : i always have a lot... but lately ive been very fixated on mental illnesses and what causes them in the brain so ive been writing down them in my notebook. (bro even studies in summer break what a fucking loser)
currently reading : i just finished reading ward d by freida mcfadden like 5 minutes ago and im about to start the inmate!!
currently wearing : uh green socks with toasters on them, black pants and black oversized shirt that says 'ramen' even though ive never eaten ramen before
currently working on : my tyunning teacher x teacher fic!! its a fic im very excited for because its been ages since i wrote member x member stuff, even though im more confident in writing those + the male perspective😅 also need a little break from tumblr (so sorry) and a break from straight fics
last google search : paranoid schizophrenia
favorite flowers : genuinely idk im not a flower person😭
thank you for tagging me @sunmoonnie and @nichozzystuffs !!!! love you both so much ~ !!!!
last song : angel baby — troye sivan
currently watching : project 7 + blue lock + deep in
current obsession : hmmm… story games, specifically horror story games!! i have a long list that i’m planning on playing over summer
currently reading : i’d say my global media studies textbook T^T
currently wearing : just woke up so… my pajamas, large oversized camo shirt (with pink characters all over it), white shorts (with a small bunny logo on them).
currently working on : my inbox!!! but, i have a lot of other works i’m trying to get done.. sneak peek— bratty kei, inspired by yeonjun’s — ice cream !! i’m excited for no labels part 2 !!!
last google search : … “width” — yes i was half asleep and forgot what the word meant while describing someone’s shoulders in a fic—
favorite flower : tulips, hydrangeas, lily of the valley, water lilies, roses
💭 info -> confession, kissing, bunch of intimate moments and descriptive language, unspoken love, description of kissing, fireworks + festival setting, strangers to lovers(?), love at first sight。 ·
ֹ · ❤︎ ⸝⸝ ──── · x reader ⠀ | fluff⠀ 〔+18〕 ॱ 🩹 ִ
fiery blossoms against the dark velvet night sky, deafening booms that crackle through your ears.
the festival had already begun, a bustling crowd of locals clustering the crammed grounds.
wafts of cooked food, notably a heavy scent of freshly roasted meat, the aroma mixed with earthy green notes of mud.
the fresh breeze flowed in as a cold stream, palate-cleansing, light, airy— breaking away the looming scent from vendors.
you were new to town, arrived a few weeks before the major festival, you were told through the grapevine, “you don’t want to miss it”. so, despite the lack of unpacking that had been put to action, you pulled out your best clothes, tidied yourself up in what felt like forever, and put a gentle smile on your face.
if you walked around looking pathetic enough, it was bound for a local to take you under their wing, at least you hoped.
the moment your shoes dug into the mud, it hit in a brutal smack of reality, a deep wave of emotions that were once too hidden. with every crumbling spark in the sky, only then did it all settle in; that feeling burrowed itself, far and deep within your ribs. missing this same walk you would usually do at your local festival, but, only then you had friends and family as company, now you were alone. too alone. you missed the activities you’d accompany, catching small fish through thin nets, begging your dad to win you the last panda plushie like you life depended on the very stuffed animal.
not it was all empty, and eery, empty isolation that floated over you like a cloud.
your feet wandered, mind was fogged by every crackle that burst through the grounds, loud, booming, that never steadied, fire that held pride and freedom. eyes wandered farther than you could keep up, replaying the games you missed out on, chuckling to yourself about how “amazing” you were at others. it felt as if everything held its breath with you, resuming when you heavy chest fell once more. thoughts consumed you in a nasty, deep pull
it all snapped with a simple tug of your arm; the hands were gentle and warm, not a furious bite— too weak. like a stray cat’s cry for help.
your head snapped, a quick turn, darting to catch the person; your face met hers. a small old lady, aged wrinkles that etched into her soft, pale skin, a smile that met you in a friendly, loving hug. her lips cracked, stuttering over her words, shaky and frail, yet she spoke with such meaning.
she tugged at your arm again, breaking you head out of whatever world it was lost in. she held onto the flesh in a soft, gentle grip. her voice was soft. “you look lost.” a gentle giggle followed behind her words. “need some guidance, dear?” you wanted to say no, she wasn’t scary— maybe the furthest thing from it. but you were always told to never leave with strangers, even the nice old lady kind.
your heart was already heavy, and with one last ache it tore you towards her gentle nature. a soft, confused nod was all she needed, she pulled you along with her through the crammed festival grounds. you waved behind her like a pathetic flag in the wind, shaking with the cold breeze.
you told yourself it was the universe giving you a helping hand, a kind, gentle hands that held onto you like your mothers once did. every uncertainty was now erased by the comfort of her. she reassured you with every step, almost if they were your first.
the overwhelming noise set off that familiar ring in your ears, the kind that broke all other noise from your reach. just the blurry silence and image of you being dragged down the grounds.
she pulled you deeper through the festival, towards a small food stand that sat just near the outskirt flowing river, cupping the edge of the festival.
warm lights that shunned cold darkness, crackles that still festered through the curve of your ear, yet the stand was just quaint enough to keep you on your toes. she took her hands in a slow ghost, lightly rubbing your arm before letting go.
the stand was small, smoke wafted through the parted curtains. pops of colored, patterned fabric swaying through the air. that aromatic scent of cooked meat— steak, and pork heavily flowed in a heavy stream. the small chair she led you to planted outside sat unmoving, modern wood that pressed cold against your legs.
she briefly popped into the stand, inaudible chatter between her and a voice much deeper. when she returned she sat near you, patting your shoulder before making it to the cushioned chair across the table.
the river was steady, the watery flow reached your ears— gentle ripples that met through the interaction, brief; her voice was that of mice, buried behind the sharp sounds of festival goers, laughs that chuckled out of you before you caught her words.
she was kind, sweet like the scent of a bakery. yet, again, the time passed slowly, too slowly; your head ached to lie against a soft pillow. but you couldn’t be rude, no, of course not… the conversation flowed like the rivers water, slow, tranquil passings that felt too comforting.
her son jumped in before she could continue the next sentence. his voice was deep, delicate words that coated your ears like honey. the sound sent pleasant waves over your back, chills that prickled against your clothes. “mom— stop it… she probably wants to go home, stop holding her hostage.” he placed a warm cup in front of you, a leafy aroma of green tea leaves filling your nose.
he was tall, a lean slimness that extenuated his legs. his frame towered over you in an instant, height that swallowed your body whole.
his hair was a soft brown, strands that shined like silk under the dim lights. his face was youthful, soft, and gentle, features that deceivingly reduced him to a small puppy. a yukata draped over his body, a deep navy cotton fabric that engulfed him, wrapped just tight enough to show off his frame.
his moves were soft, rounded at the edges, just like his plush cheeks. his eyes met yours, all for your ears to hollow out, just the steady rhythm of your heartbeat hitting through you chest until he broke the tension. “don’t mind my mom, she just gets excited when new people come to town, especially loves dragging them to her stand.” he paused a smiley curling at his lips once again, “she says it's a good luck charm, whatever that means”. the final clink of the cup hit your ears.
he sat down beside you, gesturing out for the cup. “it's freshly brewed; my mom boiled the water before she set out to kidnap you.” a light giggle laced the ends of his words, soft-spoken sentences that melted your wary heart.
your nod hesitate before confidently bobbing along.
your body tensed throughout the night— pure intimidation of how handsome he was.
the words exchanged were short; conversations held never had much outcome. just banter that felt so friendly for strangers. the most you got out of it was his name, kei; it wrapped your tongue in every right way.
“you know, you two should swim in the river, it's said to clear you negative energy for the year” her voice was raspier, words choking through her dried, tired lips.
you didn’t question it, your heart ached in sorrow for her, too soft hearted to decline her request. even it went against everything your head told you not to do. kei’s eyes flickered to you, held a second longer then they should’ve. with a steady nod you get up.
“mom— she clearly doesn’t want to do something as stupid as your old folk tales..” he was stern, crossed his arms as he leaned against the chair.
you perked up immediately, “no, no, it’s okay really, i’d be more than glad to wash away the bad luck.” you chimed, voiced covered with admiration and reassurance.
he tilted his head, like a puppy ears his hair wave through the wind. “really?” it was both a genuine and mocking question. you nodded once more, “yeah?” tone too comfortable, banter that followed the same lines of playful friendship.
your feet moved before he could respond. feeling the cold breeze hit you once more. you hear his footsteps— kei trialed behind you.
it didn’t take long for him to lose the calmness, maybe it was the memories that brought it out. he jumped in a way that felt practiced, like he had done this many times before. it was sudden, he jolted before you eyes, pace faster than you could pick up.
“come on— don't be scared!!” he pulled you swiftly off your feet, keeping his grasp light around your arm, letting you float behind him like a kite in the breeze.
the riverside was empty, waves stilled in a peaceful, steady rock, letting just the sparks overhead reflect in a crystal-clear burst. your shoes kicked off to the side; he dragged you closer to the water, letting the cold water hit your toes first, submerging you deeper— in short baby steps.
the reflection light up your face, a bright white cast that caught his attention. his gaze fixed on your features under the lights, he fixed on your lips, soft, plush dusky rose that lured him in.
maybe it was just the resonance from the fireworks sitting in; the memories flooded through in a deep wave of grief.
nothing but the solace hugged you through the waist-deep water, a rocking motion that your body flowed along to. the moonlight hit every shadowed surface, refracting off the water, casting over your face.
the atmosphere was intimate. the air carried soft unspoken feelings that drifted in the water, circling around your waist until it was replaced by his hands.
calm and steady, a touch so gentle it barely snapped you out of your head.
he held you like a piece of a fragile shell, pulled you closer until your nose brushed his.
your eyes met; the soft brown glimmering light gazed back at you. “i thought you’d be cold…” he cleared his throat, words that poured out more anxiously. “if we cuddled together, it would warm you.”
he wasn’t lying; you had been shivering through the night, your thin clothes never held thick enough against your body. now his touch held you close, feeling the warmth from his body radiate onto you until your chests pressed together, his hands holding you lower back further against him.
the unspoken gazing stretched, silence that filled from booming fireworks overhead.
you closed your eyes, taking in the surroundings.
crackling fire bursting overhead, the cold water that fought his body heat, hands fisting the navy cotton of his clothes.
the small still lingered, a fatty pork carried through the breeze— now, with the intimacy you pick up on the intoxicating note if his perfume, fresh and cozy, light sparks of musk and spice mixed within.
it was unhurried and intimate, breaths that synced before you noticed, an endless rise of your chest in unison. as your eye lids flicker open you felt the warmth of his lips press your, soft, gentle. like he was too scared it'd hurt you.
his hair tickled you pinkish cheeks.
the pace built, once gentle now grew hungrier, not smashing against him, but nuzzling deeper into his lips like you’d been starved for days. the taste of his lips was sweet, tasting of light strawberry before the green tea hit. his hands darted to your head, cupping your jaw— the other tangling through your hair. his thumb brushed over the pointed bone of your jaw. nails grazing the back of your skull.
this kiss felt brief, even if it did last for decades, the moment he pulled back you felt the absence of his warm lips. craving for him to fall forward again.
eyes watching the gentle glow reflect off his soft lips, everything that once felt so heavy crumbled into a thin dust below your feet. the same feet that felt numbed from the frigid water.
the silence filled by the crickets, chirping and booming that dizzies you over and over.
you couldn’t hold back, smashing into him like your life depended on it. your breath rapidly grew as your thirst followed. his lips synced with your in a melody that was unpracticed, yet executed like it’d been down a thousand times.
the fire works continue, bursts that sparkled with you. waves slapped between your body’s.
his hands lowered to your back, pressing you hips deeper against his, until it all faded into a sobbing, blurry mess, your emotions poured out. he swallowed ever whimper, whether it be from your crying or arousal, he comforted you through everything.
when you pull back yet again it floods out, your trembling lips, back of your hands nudging against your wet cheeks, attempting to stop the flow of emotions from spilling out.
“i’m sorry… i’m just going through a rough time” you sobbed, soft, gentle sobs.
he shook his head, thumb brushing your tears away. “don’t apologize, i love you.” with the sudden confession your eyes met his, wet, glistening with the fireworks banging behind you.
in the moment it all came to a halt, just the booming petals falling behind his head. your heart beat louder, bangs that followed the intense pops from the fireworks. your heart cried out, body melting into his arms as he held you close. letting you sob into his chest.
。info -> boyfriend maki, sitting in his lap, dry humping, gn reader, clueless reader, short imagine, grinding, cum seepage。 ·
ֹ · ❤︎ ⸝⸝ ──── · x reader ⠀ | smut⠀ 〔+18〕 ॱ ✉️ ִ
you’re sitting in maki’s lap, head nuzzled against his broad chest, legs slung over the chair's armrest in a relaxed position. his hands delicately run through your hair, nails grazing your skull in a tranquil, soothing manner, easing your wary mind through the horror game. he watched the screen, coaching through every level of the game he had played countless times over.
your hands were busy on the controller, fingers cramping with every sudden jolt and button smash. eyes were fixed on the monitor, a glowing beam of light that shone through the dark room. the sound emitted from the pc, vibrations hitting off your wall in a dramatic, loud ring.
every jerk of your fragile body sent a deep sensation of pleasure over him, your ass squeezing more demanding against his hardening cock, sudden motions that had no sexual intent were translated into a filthy product.
his ears perk at every scared whimper that sounded too needy for just fear; his eyes widen as he anxiously tugs at your hoodie for stability. his breaths grew heavy against your head, and you felt the rapid beat of his heart thump against your eardrums.
maki’s hands paused through your hair, grip ever so slightly growing less controllable.
with every small shift, he felt it grow, the unbearable arousal that blurred his once focused mind. it wasn’t very noticeable at first, yet the thickness that built through his sweatpants didn’t go unnoticed. the hard outline was still impossible to miss, even if your brain was elsewhere, the thick, hard tip pushed right against your heat.
his coaching that once thoroughly guided you now crumbled into the ashes of what was once.
the timing felt as if all this “business” would be dealt with after the game. but after never came, his hips grinding against you in gentle motions, rolls that felt less erotic on surface level. his words slurred, brain drunk off the plump press against his cock. precum seeped through his sweatpants, a slick, sticky mess that sat close against your entrance.
your brain singled in on the monitor, squirming over the constant jump of zombies on your screen. your face did that cute expression it always did when you were focused, eyebrows furrowing, eyes widening, lips pouting in a slight pout.
the air was thick, a stream of mixed emotions in the air, some were mutually unrecognized. the way your shoulders slouched and tensed with your growing fear of the game, whereas his head slowly fell back, in a deep, lustful, roughness.
the night continued in a slow, steady pace, mirroring that of his hips, gentle rolls that were checked off as comfortable adjustments.
the game sucked you in, a steep uphill battle through every level, concentration sharp as a knife— a bit too focused on the wrong article.
maki’s orgasm was looming, his hips bucking up against your unknowing entrance, precum seeped deeper through the thin sleep shorts.
his head was thrown back against the chair, nails scuffing the pleather gaming chair, abandoning your body in cold absence. the ghost of his warm embrace still lingered.
his hands grasped again, breathed slowed, grunting past his teeth, and his hips lazily pushed.
he jerked, an assertive thrust of his hips; his cock was twitching now, already throbbing and flushed. spilling hot ropes of white over himself, the liquid seeping deeper through your sleep shorts, evident, damp, and sticky. slicking your panties far enough for your trance to be broken.
you whimpered against the wet feeling, thighs tightening over his filthy mess.
maki’s hips were already turned into a sluggish squirm, groans rattling through the room. your game was long overlooked, sucked into the chasms of his desire.
❤︎⠀⠀your daddy owes money to the yixiang family, when he disappears—you become collateral to wang yixiang who's taken over his fathers business.
•⠀ masterlist 𓋰 💬 mafia!nicholas x collateral!reader ─── ᛫ dead dove do not eat, dubcon, noncon elements, slight stockhome syndrome, manipulation, co-dependency, unprotected p in v, creampie, face fucking, finger fucking, oral (m. rec), hair pulling. ✶ word count. 5691
( a/n ) this was for a paid req on my ko-fi n i finallyyy finished it >< i was having such writers block n couldnt think of how to continue scenes without making it 10k words lolol so the pacing is off (which i hate..) but i hope u all enjoy it !
the rain had been falling for three days straight, the kind of cold, relentless downpour that seeped into your bones and made the already cramped apartment feel even smaller. you were twenty-three, but most days you still felt like a ghost in your own life—shy to the point of invisibility, the girl who apologized when someone else stepped on your foot, who kept your head down at the little bookstore where you worked part-time shelving novels you could never afford to buy. your world was small, quiet, and safe only because you never asked for more.
your father had never been warm, but he had been there. until he wasn’t.
you came home that tuesday to an empty closet, missing cash from the tin under the sink, and a single crumpled note on the kitchen table in his sloppy handwriting:
kid,
debt’s too big. i’m done. you’ll manage. don’t look for me.
no “i love you.” no explanation. just the faint smell of his cheap cigarettes and the echo of a door slamming somewhere you couldn’t follow.
you sank to the floor right there in your work clothes, the cheap polyester of your blouse sticking to your skin, and cried until your throat hurt. you had no close friends to call. no savings. the landlord’s number was already lighting up your cracked phone screen.
the first collection call came two days later. you stammered that your father was gone. the voice on the other end went silent, then laughed once, low and ugly, before hanging up.
you didn’t know they were already watching.
it was the fifth night when the knock came—sharp, three raps that rattled the thin door.
you were in an oversized t-shirt and soft shorts, hair still damp from a lukewarm shower, curled on the couch with a library book you couldn’t focus on. your heart jumped into your throat. another knock, louder.
“open the door. we know you’re in there.”
you crept forward on bare feet and peered through the peephole.
three men stood in the hallway. the one in front was tall, broad through the shoulders, dressed in a black button-up with the sleeves rolled once at the forearms. sharp jaw. dark, assessing eyes. a faint scar along the inside of his elbow. he looked expensive and lethal all at once. beautiful features that still held that scary sharpness, his presence filled the cheap hallway like he owned the building.
wang yixiang.
you didn’t open it.
the lock gave way with a splintering crack. you stumbled backward with a small, terrified sound as the three men stepped inside. the two flanking him moved like they’d done this a hundred times—efficient, unhurried. one checked the bedroom. the other stayed by the door.
nicholas’s gaze swept the tiny living room, then landed on you. something shifted in his expression. not surprise exactly. interest. possession, already forming.
“wang yixiang,” he said, voice low and smooth with the faintest trace of an accent. “your father owes the wang family a significant sum. where is he?”
your back hit the wall. your arms wrapped around your middle instinctively. “h-he’s not here. he left. days ago. i—i don’t know where he went. please, i don’t have anything to do with—”
the searcher returned from the bedroom. “cleaned out. nothing of value except her.”
nicholas stepped closer. you flinched hard. he stopped, head tilting slightly as he studied the way you trembled.
“then the debt transfers,” he said calmly. “family pays what family owes. you’re coming with us. collateral.”
“no—!” the word tore out of you, high and panicked. “i don’t have money! i work at a bookstore, i barely make rent! he left me here! he doesn’t care—”
“doesn’t matter.” nicholas nodded once to the men. “take her. gently. she’s not to be damaged.”
you fought. weakly, because you had never learned how to fight. one of the men caught your wrists and zip-tied them in front of you with surprising care not to cut skin. a soft black cloth bag slipped over your head. you whimpered.
“don’t scream,” nicholas murmured near your ear. his voice was almost kind. “it won’t change anything. and i don’t enjoy hurting pretty things that don’t deserve it.”
the car ride was long and silent except for your quiet, hitching sobs. leather seats. the faint scent of his cologne—sandalwood and something darker, expensive. you could feel him beside you in the back seat, the heat of his thigh not quite touching yours.
when the bag came off, you were standing in a large bedroom inside what looked like a private estate on the outskirts of the city. high ceilings, dark polished wood, a massive bed with crisp white sheets, an attached bathroom. the windows were reinforced. the door had a heavy deadbolt on the outside.
“this is where you’ll stay,” nicholas said from the doorway, hands in his pockets like this was a business transaction. “food will be brought three times a day. if you need anything—books, clothes, whatever—tell the guard outside. behave, and you’ll be comfortable. fight, and…” he shrugged one shoulder. “comfort becomes optional.”
tears spilled hot down your cheeks. “why are you doing this? i’m innocent. i didn’t even know how much he owed—”
“in this world, innocence is a liability.” his eyes flicked over you—your bare legs, the way your tied hands trembled against your stomach, the wide, wet eyes you couldn’t hide. “your father made his choices. you get to live with them.”
he left. the lock clicked.
you curled into a ball on the bed and cried yourself hoarse.
the first week passed in a strange, suspended haze.
meals arrived on trays—proper food, better than anything you could have made. the silent guard never spoke. you tried once. he stared through you like you were already furniture.
you explored the room. there were books on the shelf—classics, some chinese poetry, a few modern thrillers. a television with cable but no streaming, no internet. the bathroom had soft towels and expensive soap that smelled like the cologne nicholas wore.
on the third day he returned.
he entered without knocking, closed the door, and pulled the single armchair closer to the bed before sitting. black shirt again. the tattoo on his forearm was visible now—a stylized dragon coiled around a sword. wang family mark, you would later learn.
you sat on the edge of the mattress, knees pulled to your chest, watching him like he might lunge.
“how are you settling?” he asked, conversational.
“i’m a prisoner,” you whispered.
“you’re protected collateral.” he leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “do you know how much your father owed us?”
you shook your head.
“enough that even if you worked every day for the rest of your life at that little bookstore, you’d never clear the interest.” his voice was matter-of-fact. “we reached out through every channel. he’s gone. no response. no attempt to bargain for you.”
the words landed like stones in your stomach. fresh tears welled. you tried to hide them, but he saw.
“crying won’t bring him back,” nicholas said, softer. “but here, at least, no one will touch you unless i allow it. the wang family has rules. you’re under my personal supervision now.”
“why?” the question slipped out before you could stop it.
he studied you for a long moment. “because when i walked into that apartment and saw you—trembling, alone, trying so hard to be brave—i decided you were mine to handle. the others wanted to auction you off or use you to send a message. i said no.” a small, almost fond curve touched his mouth. “consider it mercy.”
mercy. from the man who had zip-tied your wrists and locked you in a gilded cage.
by day seven you had started counting the hours between his visits.
when he didn’t come on day five and six, the guard simply said “boss busy” and left your tray. you paced. you read the same page of a book three times. you stared at the ceiling and wondered if anyone had even noticed you were gone. your job had already replaced you—some chirpy text from your manager about “no call, no show.” no one else had texted.
on day eight nicholas returned carrying a book.
he set it on the bed beside you. “thought you might like this one. girl finds her strength in a place she never expected.”
your fingers brushed his when you took it. you yanked your hand back like you’d been burned, cheeks flaming. “thank you.”
he watched the blush spread across your face with open fascination. “you’re still polite. even now. most people in your position would be spitting curses.”
“i’m scared,” you admitted, voice barely above a whisper. “yelling won’t change anything.”
“smart girl.” he reached out slowly, giving you time to flinch, and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. his fingertips were calloused but careful. “the world outside these walls would have eaten you alive, you know. shy little thing like you, no connections, no money. at least here you’re fed. protected.”
funny. protected by the man who kidnapped you.
you didn’t say it. you couldn’t. because some broken, lonely part of you was starting to understand what he meant.
he sat on the edge of the bed this time, closer than before. “the wang family has been in this city for three generations. my grandfather started with one gambling den and a knife. built it into import businesses, clubs, protection. debt collection is just one arm. we don’t like loose ends.” his eyes met yours. “your father was a loose end. you… you’re something else.”
your heart was beating too fast. “what am i?”
he smiled, small and sharp. “mine.”
the rain kept falling.
by the middle of week two, the pattern had settled into something that almost felt like routine. nicholas visited almost every evening. sometimes for ten minutes, sometimes for nearly an hour. he would pull the armchair close to the bed or sit on the edge of the mattress and talk to you like you were a person instead of a debt that needed guarding.
he told you more about the wang family in pieces. his grandfather had started with nothing but a single gambling den in the old district and a willingness to use a knife when collections went bad. his father had turned it into something bigger—import businesses that moved everything from electronics to things that never appeared on manifests, a handful of high-end clubs that laundered money and hosted men who liked to pretend they were legitimate. debt collection was still the ugly heart of it. nicholas spoke about it without apology, but you noticed the way his jaw tightened when he mentioned his father.
“he expects me to be the same kind of man he is,” nicholas said one night, voice low. “ruthless. efficient. no loose ends. when i told him i was keeping you here instead of selling you or making an example, he laughed. said i was getting soft.” his eyes flicked up at the ceiling and then to you. “maybe i am.”
you didn’t know what to say to that. so you stayed quiet, knees drawn up, watching him from the safety of the pillows. he didn’t push.
on another night he asked about your father. you told him the truth in small, halting pieces—how your mother had left when you were twelve, how your father had started drinking more, how the gambling had gotten worse in the last two years. how you had spent most of your life trying to be small enough that he wouldn’t notice you, wouldn’t get angry.
nicholas listened without interrupting. when you finished, he reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, the same careful gesture he’d used before.
“he left you with nothing,” he said quietly. “and still you’re trying to defend him in your head. that’s the part i don’t understand about people like you.”
you looked down at your hands. “i don’t know how to stop.”
“you will,” he answered. “eventually.”
by the end of week two you had started counting the hours until his visits the way you used to count the minutes until your shift at the bookstore ended. when he missed one evening because of “business,” the guard outside your door simply said “boss busy” and left your tray. you paced. you read the same paragraph four times. you caught yourself listening for footsteps in the hallway like a stray dog waiting for its owner.
when he finally came the next night you almost smiled before you could stop yourself.
he noticed.
“you missed me,” he said. it wasn’t a question.
you flushed and looked away. “it’s just… quiet when you’re not here.”
nicholas didn’t tease. he simply sat on the bed closer than usual and let the silence stretch until you filled it. you told him about the underlings you sometimes heard through the door—rough voices, laughter that didn’t sound kind, the occasional sound of something heavy being dragged. you admitted, voice small, that it scared you.
for a long moment he didn’t speak. he simply watched you with those dark, assessing eyes, the ones that always seemed to see too much. then he reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, the gesture so careful it made your chest ache.
“mm…they should scare you,” he said finally, voice low and even. “most of them enjoy fear. they like the way it makes people small and obedient. but they won’t touch you.” his fingers lingered at the side of your neck, thumb resting over your pulse. “i made that very clear. the first one who forgets who you belong to will lose more than his tongue.”
you shivered. not entirely from the words.
nicholas noticed. of course he did. he always noticed.
“saw that you almost smiled when i walked in tonight,” he continued, quieter now. “you caught yourself, but i saw it. you were relieved.” he didn’t sound mocking. he sounded… pleased. like he had been waiting for this exact crack in your walls.
he let the words hang between you for a moment, watching the way your shoulders drew tighter, the way your fingers twisted harder into the fabric of your shirt.
then he moved closer on the bed, not asking, simply closing the last bit of space until his thigh pressed solidly against yours and his arm settled around your back. his hand found the nape of your neck again, thumb resting over your pulse like he was taking measure of how fast it was racing.
you didn’t pull away. that was the part that made your stomach twist the most.
nicholas’s fingers stroked slowly along the side of your throat, almost absentminded, like he was soothing something skittish. “relief is a dangerous thing,” he said quietly. “it means you’re starting to separate me from the rest of them. from the men who laugh in the hallway. from the ones who would have already broken you open and thrown the pieces away.” his thumb pressed a little firmer against your pulse. “it means some part of you has already decided i’m the safer option. and you hate that, don’t you?”
you stayed quiet, staring at your own hands. the silence felt heavier than it should have.
shame crawled hot under your skin, thick and suffocating. you hated how easily your body had stopped fighting his closeness. how your shoulders had loosened the second his arm came around you. how some exhausted, traitorous part of you had actually leaned into the warmth of his chest instead of pulling away.
you had spent your whole life trying to be small enough to survive—first with your father, then with the world that had never wanted you—and now here you were, letting the man who had taken you by force and locked you in this room stroke your throat like you were something he was gentling.
it made you feel sick. it made you feel pathetic. and worst of all, it made something small and desperate inside you whisper that at least when he was here, the fear was quieter. at least when he touched you, you weren’t completely alone.
you hated yourself for that thought more than anything else.
nicholas watched you for another long moment, thumb still resting over your pulse like he could feel every shameful beat. then he stood. the loss of his warmth was immediate and jarring. you hated that too.
he reached down and patted the top of your head—once, twice—the way someone might soothe a well-behaved pet. the gesture was gentle. it was also deeply condescending. his fingers lingered in your hair for a second longer than necessary before he spoke.
“i’ll be leaving for a few days,” he said, voice calm and even, like he was discussing the weather. “business in another city. my father wants me to handle something in person. i won’t be able to visit while i’m gone.”
the words landed like ice water.
your head snapped up before you could stop it. the panic was instant and humiliating, rising fast in your chest. a few days. he had missed nights before because of “business,” but he had always come back the next evening or the one after.
this felt different. longer. more final. the thought of waking up in this room without the possibility of his footsteps in the hallway, without his low voice filling the silence, without the careful weight of his hand on your neck—it made something crack open inside you that you didn’t want to examine.
you opened your mouth, then closed it again. you didn’t know what you had been about to say. please don’t? how long is a few days? what if something happens while you’re gone? the questions were pathetic. you were pathetic for even thinking them.
nicholas saw it all. the way your eyes widened. the way your hands twisted tighter in your shirt. the way your breathing had gone shallow. he didn’t smile, but something satisfied flickered behind his eyes.
“you’re panicking,” he observed, almost gently. “interesting.”
you looked away fast, shame burning hotter. you wanted to disappear. you wanted to crawl under the blankets and pretend you hadn’t just reacted like that to the news of his absence. but your body wouldn’t cooperate. your heart was beating too hard. the room already felt emptier, even when he hadn’t left yet.
he reached down again and tipped your chin up with two fingers, forcing you to meet his gaze. “the guard will still bring your meals. you’ll still have your books. nothing in this room will change.” his thumb brushed once across your bottom lip. “but you won’t see me. you won’t hear my voice. and you’re realizing you don’t like that very much, are you?”
you tried to pull your chin away. he didn’t let you.
“i told you once that you would stop defending him in your head eventually,” nicholas said, quieter now. “this is the same thing. you’re starting to understand that the only person who comes back for you is me. the only person who chooses to keep you soft instead of breaking you is me. and now that i’m taking that away for a few days, you’re scared.” his fingers tightened just slightly on your jaw.
“good. that means you’re learning.”
he let go of your face and patted your head once more, slower this time, almost like he was rewarding you for the panic you couldn’t hide.
“i’ll be back before you have time to forget what my hands feel like,” he said. “try not to spiral too badly while i’m gone. i want you in one piece when i return.”
he turned and walked to the door without looking back. the lock clicked shut behind him with the same final sound it always made.
you sat there for a long time after, knees drawn up, arms wrapped around yourself like they could replace the weight of his arm. the shame sat heavy in your chest, thick and bitter. you had almost smiled when he walked in tonight. you had let him hold you. you had felt relief when he touched you. and now the thought of him being gone for days made your stomach twist with something dangerously close to grief.
you pressed your forehead to your knees and tried to breathe.
it didn’t work.
the room was already too quiet.
you wondered if this was what dying felt like.
it was funny, in a sick, twisted way.
here you were—sobbing so hard your throat had gone raw and your voice had collapsed into something hoarse and broken at the fact your kidnapper that left you alone for a few days. every unexpected sound in the hallway made you flinch so violently your whole body jerked. the tray of food the guard left went mostly untouched. you couldn’t bring yourself to eat. you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything except sit on the bed with your arms wrapped around your knees and wait for footsteps that never sounded like his.
why did your heart hurt this much?
the question circled endlessly, mean and relentless. nicholas had kidnapped you. he had zip-tied your wrists, locked you in this room, and told you in that calm, certain voice that you belonged to him now. he had taken everything from you—your freedom, your future, even the small, sad life you’d been living before. and yet the thought of him not coming back made something inside you feel like it was caving in.
you tried to rationalize it. maybe you were just scared of what would happen if he died out there on whatever ugly business his father had sent him to handle. if nicholas was gone, there would be no one left to tell the others to keep their hands off you. you would either rot in this room until someone remembered you existed, or they would drag you out and use you the way nicholas had once said they wanted to. that was the logical explanation. that was the one that didn’t make you feel completely insane.
but it wasn’t the whole truth, and you knew it.
the truth was uglier. the truth was that some broken, lonely part of you had started needing him. not just his protection. him. the low sound of his voice. the careful weight of his hand on the back of your neck. the gentle feeling of his fingers in your hair. the way he looked at you like you were something he had chosen to keep instead of something the world had thrown away. you hated yourself for it. you hated how easily you had leaned into his chest that last night. you hated that you had almost smiled when he walked through the door. you hated that his absence felt like a hole in your chest that nothing else could fill.
every time footsteps passed in the hallway, your heart would lurch—stupid, desperate hope—only to crash when they kept moving. they never slowed. they never stopped at your door. and every time it happened, the ache got worse. you would press your forehead harder against your knees and try to breathe through it, but the sobs would come anyway, quiet and wrecked, until your voice gave out completely.
you told yourself it was fear. you told yourself it was survival instinct. you told yourself anything that made the feeling make sense.
none of it helped.
the two weeks had felt like dying in slow motion.
you had stopped counting the days properly after the first week. time blurred into long stretches of staring at the ceiling, jumping at every sound in the hallway, and trying not to fall apart completely when the footsteps never belonged to him.
you told yourself he was probably dead. that his father’s business had finally taken him the way it took so many others—another body in whatever ugly war the wang family was always fighting. the thought should have brought relief. instead it left you hollow and sick, because if nicholas was gone, then so was the only thing keeping you from becoming exactly what he’d warned you about.
but when the familiar rhythm of his footsteps finally reached your door, your heart slammed so hard against your ribs you thought it might actually burst.
the door opened.
he looked wrong.
the white button-up was wrinkled and half-unbuttoned, sleeves rolled to his forearms so the pale scar near his elbow stood out stark against his skin. a black vest hung open over it, tie pulled loose and crooked like he’d been yanking at it. his face was the worst part. tired, bloodshot eyes that still burned with something sharp and unhinged. dried blood streaked across his jaw and one cheek, flaking in places. more of it crusted on his fingers. he looked like he hadn’t slept. like whatever he’d done out there had followed him back inside this room.
you wondered if the wild hammering in your chest was fear or relief.
maybe both.
it didn’t matter. the second he stepped inside and kicked the door shut behind him, the relief died screaming.
nicholas crossed the room in three long strides. his hand shot out and gripped your jaw hard, fingers digging into your skin as he forced your head back. some of the blood still partially wet on his knuckles smeared against your cheek. up close, he smelled like gunpowder, sweat, and something metallic.
you made a small, broken sound.
he didn’t speak at first. he just looked at you—really looked—like he was checking to make sure you were still exactly where he’d left you. his thumb dragged roughly across your bottom lip, smearing a trace of blood there too.
“two weeks,” he said, voice low and rough, nothing like the calm tone he used to use. “and you still look at me like that. fuck.”
you tried to turn your face away. his grip tightened until it hurt.
“don’t,” he warned. “i’ve spent fourteen fucking days thinking about this room. about you in it. about whether you were still here or whether someone had gotten stupid while i was gone.” his other hand came up and fisted in your hair, yanking your head back further. “and the second i walk in, you look at me like you don’t know whether to be scared or happy i’m alive.”
tears stung your eyes. you hated that he could still read you so easily.
nicholas leaned in until his blood-streaked face was inches from yours. his breath was hot against your mouth.
“which one is winning right now?” he asked. “fear? or relief?”
you didn’t answer. you couldn’t. your throat had closed up.
he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. it was sharp and exhausted and a little unhinged.
“doesn’t matter,” he murmured. “both work for me.”
his hand left your jaw only to shove you backward onto the bed. you landed hard. before you could scramble away he was on you, knee between your thighs, one hand still fisted in your hair while the other ripped at the front of your shirt. buttons scattered. he didn’t bother being careful. he yanked the fabric apart and dragged his bloodied fingers down your chest, leaving faint red smears across your skin.
“wait—nicho—”
the word barely left your mouth.
nicholas didn’t let you finish.
his hand clamped over your lips, hard, smothering the rest of his name. the blood on his fingers smeared across your mouth and cheek as he shoved you deeper into the mattress.
“don’t,” he warned, voice low and ragged. “don’t say my name like you’re still allowed to tell me no.”
you made a muffled, panicked sound against his palm. he ignored it. with his other hand he finished tearing your shirt open the rest of the way, buttons pinging across the floor. his bloodied fingers dragged down your bare chest, leaving red streaks over your skin like he was marking you.
“two weeks,” he muttered, almost to himself. “two fuckin’ weeks of thinking about this. about you. about whether someone had touched what’s mine while i was gone.” his knee forced your thighs wider. “and you’re still trying to say wait? thought you’d learned. thought my absence would be enough to break you so i wouldn’t have to take.”
“guess not.”
he moved his hand from your mouth only to shove two fingers past your lips instead, pressing down on your tongue. you gagged around them. the metallic taste lingering on your tongue. he didn’t care.
“open properly.”
when he pulled his fingers out they were wet with your spit. he didn’t give you time to breathe before he was undoing his belt one-handed, the other still fisted tight in your hair. he freed his cock—already hard, flushed dark—and dragged the head across your lips, smearing precum and a faint trace of blood.
“clean it.”
you hesitated, tears already spilling. nicholas yanked your hair hard enough to make your eyes water and pushed forward, forcing the head past your lips and into your mouth. he didn’t ease in. he thrusted shallowly at first, then deeper, using your hair as a handle to fuck your throat in rough, impatient strokes. you choked around him, hands flying up to push at his thighs. he caught both wrists in one hand and pinned them above your head against the mattress.
“that’s it,” he growled, hips snapping forward. “take it. you spent two weeks crying over me—now you can choke on me instead.”
he used your mouth until your jaw ached and tears streamed down your temples, until spit dripped down your chin and onto your bare chest. only then did he pull out, breathing hard, and flip you onto your stomach like you weighed nothing. he yanked your hips up, shoved your face into the pillow, and pushed two fingers into you without warning.
you were wet. shame burned through you at how easily your body betrayed you.
nicholas laughed once, low and mean. “look at that. missed me that much, huh?” he fucked you with his fingers hard and fast, curling them cruelly until your legs shook. “say it. say you missed me while i was gone.”
you shook your head into the pillow, sobbing. he added a third finger and curled them up—hitting that spot so perfectly that your legs shook and your mouth betrayed you by letting out pathetic muffled whimpers and whines.
“say it or i’ll make it hurt more.”
“i—i missed you—” the words came out broken and muffled.
he pulled his fingers out and replaced them with his thick cock in one brutal thrust, burying himself to the hilt. you cried out into the pillow. it stung. it wasn’t like you’d been a virgin. you’d done less than savory work to keep food in your stomach but it had been awhile—not to mention, he was big. maybe not extremely long but long enough that you occasionally felt his cock press against your cervix. more than you’d ever taken.
he didn’t give you a second to adjust. he fucked you hard and deep, one hand still fisted in your hair, the other gripping your hip so tightly you knew there would be bruises.
“two weeks,” he snarled against your ear, pace relentless. “two weeks of thinking about this pretty little cunt. about how tight you’d get when you’re terrified. about how cute you look when you cry.” he yanked your head back by the hair, forcing your back to arch. “and you were in here wondering if i was dead? pathetic.”
you were sobbing openly now, overwhelmed, but your body kept clenching around him. nicholas noticed. of course he did.
“still getting wet for me even while you’re crying,” he said, voice rough with something between anger and satisfaction. “cute. you’re learning well.”
he reached around and rubbed your clit in tight, brutal circles while he kept fucking you. the combination was too much. you came with a broken, humiliated sound, walls fluttering around him. nicholas groaned, fucked you through it, then pulled out and flipped you onto your back again.
he shoved back inside before you could catch your breath, pinning your wrists above your head. his blood-streaked face hovered over yours as he fucked you slower but deeper, grinding against that gummy spot inside you with every thrust. you could feel your vision begin to blur. the overstimulation drowning you within its waters.
“look at me,” he ordered.
you tried. your eyes, red and wet with tears. he looked down at you with sharp cat like eyes—and god, did he look like he wanted to devour you whole.
“you’re mine,” he said, voice quieter but no less intense. “even when i’m gone. even when you’re scared of me. even when you hate yourself for missing me.” his hips snapped forward harder. the sound of skin slapping against skin echoing throughout the room.
“say it while i’m inside you. come on, pretty girl.”
“i’m yours—” it tore out of you on a sob.
and thats all it took, your admission of giving yourself up to your captor. nicholas’s rhythm faltered as he buried himself deep and came with a low, guttural sound, flooding you in hot, thick pulses. he stayed there, cock twitching inside you, forehead pressed to yours as he caught his breath. all you could do was whimper at the warm heavy feeling of his cum filling you up.
for a long moment the only sounds were your ragged breathing and the wet sound of him still inside you.
then he kissed you—slow, almost gentle, tasting like copper and exhaustion.
when he finally pulled out, he watched his cum leak out of you with dark, satisfied eyes. he dragged two fingers through it and pushed them back inside you, like he was making sure it stayed.
“missed you too,” he murmured against your temple, voice rough. “more than i should’ve.”
his bloodied fingers stroked your hair almost tenderly while you shook beneath him.
artist!jo who is obsessed with the way you look ruined under him so he cant stop sketching you and every single detail of your body because you are engraved in his brain, draws every single position he has done with you or even positions he is too shy to ask for
his favorite sight will always be you laying on your back, head slightly hanging from the bed while he fucks your throat, loves to see the way his dick makes a bulge on your throat, he traces the outline of his dick with his fingers so softly as if he was already picturing drawing it on his favorite sketchbook
his dick is always twitching making a little mess inside his pants whenever he draws you, tries his hardest to resist the urge to touch himself but sometimes he cant even finish the drawing because he has to get off at the thought of him filling you up in every way possible (and even finishes all over the drawings...)
