Positive self-esteem protocol, to "directly and systematically evoke positive feeling states in conjunction with the self-representation"
(1) Situation-based self-esteem enhancement: drawing on particular situations that create "short-duration positive self-esteem states", usually associated with "doing something effectively."
Imagine a situation in which you really like yourself. Imagine a scene in which you are feeling deeply satisfied with yourself. Imagine a situation in which you’re feeling really proud about yourself [or in which you are especially pleased with yourself, or in which you are especially confident about yourself] . . . and when the scene has become clear to you, you can describe what’s happening and the positive feelings you’re having about yourself.
(2) Enhancing self-esteem in the context of relationships: "it is often far more difficult for those with self-esteem deficits to evoke and maintain positive self-feelings in relationship to others as compared to the context of activities."
Imagine a situation in which you are feeling especially good about yourself in relationship to others [or feeling really comfortable with yourself around others, or feeling that you matter to someone] . . .
Imagine a scene in which others are respecting or appreciating you for who you are [or in which you are being with others in a way that you are letting them see who you really are in a deep way, and they’re responding really well to who you are] . . . When you’re ready, you can describe what’s happening and the positive feelings you’re having about yourself.
(3) Skill development: "develop[ing] skill in generating positive self-feelings quickly and for longer duration, and to generalize the learning across contexts"
See how quickly you can come into contact with the strong, positive feelings about yourself . . . and more and more you’ll find yourself being able to bring your positive feelings about yourself more and more quickly into your awareness . . . so that you always have access to them, really quickly.
Notice that you can hold this strong, positive feeling about yourself for longer and longer . . . you can come to feel especially good about yourself for longer and longer durations.
Familiarize yourself with this state of mind . . . these strong positive feelings about yourself . . .Now imagine bringing this positive self-feeling into some other situation . . . a situation that you don’t normally associate with holding a positive feeling about yourself . . .
(4) Stress challenge: maintaining positive self-feelings in situations have been associated with strong negative self-feelings. Introducing the expectation that one can maintain a strong, positive feeling about themselves even in the most difficult of situations that have been associated with a strong loss of self-esteem.
Now imagine having and keeping especially good feelings about yourself in exactly the type of situation that you could never imagine feeling good about yourself in before [or in the type of situation that you were previously at risk of losing a good sense of yourself in, or keeping a good sense of yourself in the midst of difficulties, or keeping a good sense of yourself in exactly the type of situations where you previously felt bad about yourself, or imagine that you are feeling good about yourself even in the worst situations you can imagine].
(5) Integrating self-esteem as a way of being: "the development of positive self-esteem over the course of the therapy eventually transcends activities and becomes a way of being"
Imagine a scene about some time in the future when you have become less and less concerned about accomplishments and more and more about discovering contentment within yourself . . .
Imagine that it begins to feel that you have always felt this way . . .
Imagine a part of your mind will always carry this awareness . . .
You’ll begin to sense this good feeling about yourself as part of the core of your being.
The scene will be about being valued without needing to do anything.
In this scene, you can delight in just being who you are. You can be content just in who you are. You’re finding that special quality of being. You’re feeling good just to be alive. You’re finding a greater satisfaction in life in everyday living, where just being with yourself and as yourself is enough.
Notes from Appendix A, The Core Self, Proactive Self-Agency, Self-Esteem, and the "Best" Self, in Attachment Disturbances in Adults: Treatment for Comprehensive Repair, Daniel P. Brown and David S. Elliott
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