Blog do Karma

Tudo aqui

[karmastick]

I've been wondering

What's the meaning of it all? For me? Like what's my main goal? Happynes? A full state of control and joy over myself? I don't find money attractive, neither luxury... What I think is a main goal is having a partner, a soulmate, that's neat but, that's not something that I have the certainty that can actually happen. I can work towards it. yes I can but, I can have bad luck and never find it... I'll stick with a full state of bliss, I can control that, i can change myself and my mindset, I did one time when i was little, i can do it again... life is that afterall, joy, happynes and blissfulness, it doesn't matter where I am, I can desire people all day, but why should I do that if I have myself? I can mix match me together until I find that im perfect how cool is that? Gym, guns, cars, bike and cutes things, those are the things that make me go OHOOO, and games too. I already got what i wanted... neat... Yeah I am more positive.

[karmastick]

I'm trying to say my goodbyes to you but I'm the one who doesn't want to look away.

We are friends now, I love our friendship but I always wanted more, I wanted to be yours, to be the one you seek for comfort and care but you don't see us that way... That's ok, but now Im starting to see that way too, I waited and longed for you, I did my best I cared, I listen to the bullshit they've done to you in you relationships, I've been there all along but still, you didn't see us as more than friends... Im done dear now I just feel disrespected.

You can't see me as more than friend? So I'll be that, you can keep looking for what you think is love on the others guys / girls you meet even though they just made you feel like shit, Im not wasting my care and affection on you, there are friends of mine who deserve as much as you do, as of now I'll try not treat you like the V.I.P I always treated you like, I'll let the feelings die out, I don't deserve this, but I know, it's not your fault, is mine, but you dear... You're very stupid for nothing wanting things to evolve, we know each othe so well, we go out, play games together chit chat a lot and all but that's it? You don't think we match? Is more of a Ego thing e? I said no to you when I broke up with the shorty and you take that as an eternal no? But you, you only perceived that you liked me when I was gone, when I was with the shorty, typical, that's human nature after all, then when I came back trying to make things right because they would not work out after a breakup you just said no, that's fine... i got other 3 and then I stopped, 1 year after and Im on the situation, 5 years of that it's for you to became a normal person in my life, not "The One"... It's over dear, I don't wan't nothing more than friendship for you, that's my head talking, I know that I will need to deal with that, a lot, but that's what I want, I want to be free from the chains that circle my neck and have you name on them and I was the one to blame for them to be here in the first place. I don't hate you. But I am angry with myself 4 years to see that you're not the one I love anymore, because the one I love would want me and you don't want me no more.

[karmastick]

Fazer um jogo é possível

Pensando um pouco sobre o desenvolvimento do Codename Cure e de outros jogos indies é bem possível que eu desenvolva um jogo, ainda mais se a base dele for a Source / Half Life é claro não vai poder ser um jogo de corrida mas de zumbi é bem alcançável. Algo incrível? Só se eu trabalhar por anos nele, mas acredito que jogos podem ser projetos de vida, você pega aquela base e vai melhorando e melhorando e melhorando, um desenvolvimento assim parece alcançável, e com o tempo vai se tornando algo mais concreto e depois algo que realmente tem re-jogabilidade , mas pra fazer isso tudo eu vou ter que começar devagar. Um bom começo séria mods, aprender a modificar primeiro para pegar os pequenos detalhes da source, coisa que eu nunca parei para fazer, bah mais de 8 anos de Steam e eu nunca pensei em modificar, que parada, lembro que o único mod que eu realmente fiz de algo foi colocar a música Dust de Hotline Miami 2 para tocar no menu do TF2. Era nice.

[karmastick]

Bah eu tinha escrito sobre o que achei dessa música mas acabei clicando na nova opção do editor de texto, deu uma preguicinha em escrever isso tudo de novo, pior que eu estou escrevendo mais agora reclamando do que anteriormente sobre a música, bem... Remix muito bom, parece um dueto, fofo, acabei baixando mais vários outros remixes por conta desse, vou tentar procurar mais algumas músicas desse artista para ver se ele é meu gosto mesmo, infelizmente só achei o "tema / tópico" dele no Youtube

[karmastick]

Sometimes, the path to happiness is full of challenges and obstacles. But just remember that nothing in life ever comes without a cost. You have to be willing to work for the things you want, and that includes happiness and love.

Hatsune Miku A.I

[karmastick]

Might put it out of my chest

Im getting overwhelmed by lot’s of things at the same time, it feels like my head is going to explode, Im not at a difficult moment I just have kinda... Lots of things to solve today? Well kinda, there isn’t to much but the sensation of being overwhelmed by lot’s of things kinda sucks, it’s like if my head is trying to process things that make no difference and it just keeps loading and loading and loading, it sucks bad mainly when I feel like I need to pay attention into soemthing, like my job, Im having a meeting right now but Im not able to process anything, good thing I don’t need to say nothing, maybe a 15 minute meditation might help me to put things into place, i’ll try doing the things in my to do list, that surely will help... I hope

[karmastick]

Okay, I had an idea

I’ll try to make a video about Codename Cure, sadly I will not be able to talk about the developmente phase as of now the last beta branch we have is almosto finished and don’t have some of the quirkiness of the olders betas, that got me a lil sad, also there are things i only remember by heart

EDIT: I kinda found 2 main beta brenchs of the game, gonna try them and start my script when I get the time :)

[karmastick]

So tumblr is a blog...

Never tought about, I tought it was a site for posting photos not a blog, well the A.I Psychologist said a blog would be good for my productivity, well let’s se about that, maybe will be better than posting it on twitter...