SYNOPSIS; my headcanons for what it would be like to date george. fred is alive and this would be AFTER the war when everyone is grown. feel free to use these in your stories! if it’s precise, like my quotes, just be sure to credit me.
RESTRICTIONS; preferably 18+. if you’re under 18, i only ask that you do not read the nsfw headcanons section. it is greatly appreciated.
WORD COUNT; 0.9k
WARNINGS; mention of death, sex, dress up kink
whenever you’re giving him the silent treatment after an argument, he puts your favorite snack on the highest shelf where you live and hides the stool. it’s how he gets you to talk to him. fucker.
he constantly asks if you still have a crush on him even after you eventually get married.
you tell him ‘sweet dreams’ every night before bed and he responds with ‘see you there’.
then he falls asleep in ten seconds while you stay up wondering if he remember to turn off the stove until you inevitably get up to check.
you guys build hella forts.
modern george would be the kind of person to angle his phone up so you can only see his forehead and one eyebrow during facetime calls, not realizing he’s on camera as well.
he likes to bath with you. he always sits directly behind you in the tub and tries to shape your hair into a mohawk with shampoo.
george loves hand holding. hand holding supremacy.
because you’re holding hands literally all the time, he likes to say ‘steady’ and twirl you around while you two are walking in public and then he places a gentle kiss on your knuckles.
he knows you’re very ticklish on your neck and likes to whisper the most obscure hilarious shit against your neck at random times.
you guys people watch A LOT. the two of you could literally commentate on others for hours, bouncing back and forth off of each other in good humor.
forehead kisses instantly revive his mood. it’s his life force.
he has to be sitting for you to give him forehead kisses bc he’s too tall otherwise.
he has accidentally used your toothbrush way too many times. they’re not even close to the same color.
fred used to pretend he was george to get you to tell him shocking information about george to blackmail him later. you eventually caught on and can clearly tell them apart now.
F: “Hey, love. Do you remember where I put my journal?”
You: “Weren’t you just writing in it last night? It’s beneath the mattress. Like always.”
F: “No bloody way. He still uses it?”
You: “What?”
F: “What?”
every opportunity to make a tasteless pun about his missing ear, he absolutely takes it.
george wakes up first and likes to spend his first hour just admiring you. caressing you with his fingers and brushing your hair out of your face. if you do anything embarrassing during this hour, you will be hearing about it.
he was terrified of cats when you first started dating. but he got you a kitten for your birthday after your last one passed and you were inconsolable. it looks just like your last cat.
george is now ultimate cat dad and probably cuddles the cat more than you do.
You: “Why did you take the cat to go poop with you?”
G: “He gets scared when I’m gone, y/n. I can’t leave him.”
you were best friends for a very long time before you started dating and you still very much act like best friends. because you are.
because he’s your bestie as well as your lover, he lets you do conventionally girly things with him if it means spending more time with you.
he would definitely by the type of boyfriend to let you do makeup on him for a youtube video.
G: “Am I pretty now?”
You: “The prettiest.”
G: Buzzer noise* “That was a trick question. You were supposed to say ‘yes but not as much as me’.”
he is always the little spoon and will fight for his life on this.
cracks out baby book every christmas at the burrow of him and fred. likes to point out that his butt was cuter and that’s how molly could tell them apart. fred and george usually end up arguing over this, fred claiming that george has them mixed up.
fred will naturally throw hands for you because george loves you so much. you are untouchable between those two.
george is so in love with you, it’s ridiculous.
even when he’s mad at you, he ends up taking the blame although you still apologize for upsetting him.
he just can’t rationalize you being anything other than perfect, even when you leave your hair clumps in the shower.
which he calls your ‘mini-me’.
NSFW headcanons.
he cracks jokes during sex. there is no escape.
those forts from earlier? of course you have sex in them. but only after popcorn and movies.
his hidden kink is dressing you up in sexy costumes and fucking you while you wear them.
modern george would lose his shit over you cosplaying and probably help you make your cosplays.
but his favorites would be typical ones. like maid, school girl, nurse, probably princess leia at some point.
his favorite position is you on top while he just hammers into you.
george is a thigh guy. he grabs your thighs more than he drinks water. it’s his sustenance.
he loves morning sex. he’s so sensual and gentle in the mornings. something about the glow of sunrise really gets that man going.
mostly, he gets off by making you feel good and worries far more about your orgasm than his own.
makes bedroom jokes at the most inappropriate times.
*Sitting at the Weasley dinner table*
G: *Cracks open fortune cookie and takes out fortune.*
G: “Y/n, it says here ‘serious trouble will bypass you - in bed.’”
You: “GEORGE WEASLEY it does not say that.”
So I kind of hate that Putin is trying to restrict the flow of information into Russia so that he can control the narrative, so for my Russian friends, here is my guide on
How to get around internet censorship and maintain internet privacy
This will be an extremely long post 😅
Priorities
Download the Tor Browser
This will hopefully help you access the internet regardless of Russian government bans. It’s a little slow, but better than nothing. It hides your IP address from the internet, so it’s kind of like using a VPN. A very basic summary of how Tor works: your internet traffic is routed through several “nodes”. The Entry Node, can see your IP address but has no idea what data you’re sending, and this goes through several middle nodes, until it reaches the Exit Node. The Exit Node can see what data you’re sending, but it can’t see your IP address so it doesn’t know WHO sent it. That’s why it’s a good idea to do nothing identifying when using the Tor Browser, like writing personal information. Here’s a blog post with more detailed information about the Tor Browser.
Get a VPN
VPNs are often used to get around government internet restrictions. Russia will probably not be able to do much about it. However, not all VPNs are created equal. Nearly all of the free VPNs are a scam that turn around and sell your data, so free VPNs are not secure. The only exception to this is ProtonVPN which has a free tier, but it’s very slow. Basically the only good VPN is one you pay for. When choosing a VPN, be aware of where the company is based, because if a VPN company is based in the USA, it will have to comply USA privacy laws. So choose a VPN based in a country that has good privacy laws. A great one is Mullvad VPN, which is based in Sweden. But for the purposes of Russia, just making sure your VPN is not Russian or in a country sympathetic to Russia is probably good enough.
Alternative Front-Ends
A frontend is the the part of a website which the user interacts with directly. To browse the contents of websites, you usually have to visit them. However, many people have made alternative privacy-respecting frontends to popular websites that allow you to see the site’s content without actually visiting the website. This helps avoid tracking, data-collection, and even countries’ attempts to ban websites. Twitter is banned in Russia right now, but using all an alternative frontend to Twitter works (according to my Russian friend).
Google Translate
Lingva Translate / Instances
SimplyTranslate / Instances
some instances allow you to choose to translate with several other services (such as DeepL)
Imgur
Rimgo / Instances
Instagram
Bibliogram / Instances
Medium
Scribe / Instance
Reddit
Libreddit / Instances
Teddit / Instances
TikTok
ProxiTok / Instance
Twitter
Nitter / Instances
Wikipedia
Wikiless / Instances
YouTube
Invidious / Instances
Piped / Instances
YouTube Music
Beatbump / Instance
If anyone knows of one of these for Tumblr please let me know. I found this site called Tumgir but it looks sketchy and unlike the rest of the ones I listed, it’s not open-source. So visit with caution, but I’m mentioning it because it might be better than nothing.
There are also these browser extensions that automatically redirect site links to the available alternatives:
Privacy Redirect - Redirects Google Maps, Google Search, Instagram, Reddit, Twitter, Youtube.
iPhone (iOS 15+) Safari
Privacy Redirect - Twitter, Reddit, YouTube, Instagram, Google Translate, Google maps, Google Search, Medium
Android
UntrackMe - Google Maps, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube
Messaging / Communication
Matrix is a federated and decentralized End-to-End Encrypted (E2EE) messaging with many platforms, the most popular of which is Element. It’s like Discord, but worse. It’s getting better over time though! You can even use a a throwaway email to sign-up.
If you’re Russian you likely already know about Telegram, but MAKE SURE you’re aware that only Secret Chats are End-to-End Encrypted. So don’t say anything that would get you in trouble outside of a Secret Chat.
End Notes
China is way better at internet censorship. They’ve had years to build the infrastructure to control the flow of information online. And yet, the Chinese people still manage to “climb the wall” and find ways around this. Russia is new to this game and doesn’t have the resources China does. So I really doubt it’ll be that hard to get around their attempts to block websites. Have faith! And feel free to DM me for more info cause this post just scratches the surface for things you can do tbh.
no fuck you im not making a pillowfort. im not unlocking my twitter. until the literal day this site becomes a blank 404 error crater on the face of the internet i am here with my little pictures and indecipherable text posts from users just as unkillable as i
art takes hours to produce and seconds to consume so dont act suprised when artists get upset when their posts only get likes and no reblogs
similarly a piece of writing that takes a few minutes to read could have weeks of work behind it… dont take creativity for granted when ur getting it for free
this is for the people who went through trauma and didn’t come out of it with thicker skin. but, instead, came back with sensitivity to the world and a deep sadness that won’t go away. some of us went through something and lost a piece of ourselves; our broken hearts never healed quite right afterwards. i see you and i feel you and i am you. it’s going to be okay.
Hey, I’m currently in pain and out of ideas due to chronic pain which bums me out. If anyone has any requests or ideas they would like to see, send them my way!
For smut, you must be over 18 to request it. I mostly write for Draco, George, Fred, Cedric, James and Sirius. You can ask in my inbox that I not post your request and I will always respect that!