[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[leorioismydad-deactivated201809]

these all have the same energy

[leorioismydad-deactivated201809]

another contender

[weavemama]

maybe if we unplug America and plug it back in???

[uwuguay-deleting-deactivated202]

leave it unplugged

[vainvaihe]

Me: a poor New Driver just trying to switch lanes

The asshole behind me that has decided I am Not Valid and must be stopped:

[just-shower-thoughts]

‘Kobe’ is for accuracy, 'Yeet’ is for distance.

[memewhore]

[mwagneto]

It b like that somtimes

[wildandunruly]

hey! i’m selling an Interactive Introverts ticket for the LA show (August 9th) at face value. the seat is in the left orchestra area (row c, seat 503). message me for details 💞

[cockhunt]

[ithelpstodream]

[skybars]

small psa ! my friend is selling two ii tickets for uniondale ny on july 15th and if anyone would like to buy them or knows anyone who would please message me and i’ll get you in touch w them ! thank you

[hekacute-deactivated20141230]

I went to high school with a kid who would only drink out of a baby bottle. He brought a large baby bottle to school every day. At first, we thought that he was using it to sneak alcohol or something, but he wasn’t. He would bring it filled with chocolate milk and then fill it up with Coca-Cola and Sprite during lunch. He’d buy a can of each and mix them together. Like I said, it was a large bottle.

I didn’t know the kid that well and I didn’t have any classes with him so I never really talked to him that much. I knew his name. His name was Kevin. Sometimes I’d see him at parties on the weekends. He still had his baby bottle. He would fill it with beer and rum.

He dated my sister’s friend, Emily, for a little while. I had known Emily for a long time. She had been a friend of my sister’s since they were five or six. They were really good friends. She spent a lot of time at our house for sleepovers and stuff. Sometimes she would pee the bed, but I never made fun of her for it. I think most older brothers would have loved the opportunity to make fun of their sister’s friend for peeing the bed and I think she really appreciated that I never mentioned it even though I definitely knew about it because after the sixth or seventh time, my parents started paying me to clean everything up instead of having to do it themselves.

I asked Emily why Kevin only ever drank out of a baby bottle and she said that she didn’t know. They had only been dating for a very short time at that point and she didn’t want to bring it up and offend him or anything. I asked her to tell me if she ever found out. They broke up right after that and I kind of forgot about it because Kevin stopped going to school. I don’t know if he transferred or dropped out, but I never saw him at lunch or any parties after that.

I hadn’t thought about him in a long time, but Emily happened to mention him while she was over at our house recently and I immediately remembered the baby bottle thing.

“Did you ever find out why he drank out of that bottle?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, he told me why,” Emily said. “He used it because he heard that babies that drink out of bottles for too long or drink sweet drinks out of them get really bad teeth problems. He wanted all of his teeth to go bad so that they would fall out and he would be able to fit a softball in his mouth. He said that he wanted to have the world record for being the first person to be able to put a whole softball in his mouth and he wouldn’t be able to do that with all of those teeth in the way.”

[pluginduck]

What the fuck did I just read

[mytoecold-deactivated20180808]

[cockroach-queer]

Sometimes I’m like “ancient greek plays are so old, how am i going to relate to the characters?” but then 

[ithelpstodream]

[paper-mario-wiki]

i love that the remnants of an age where thousands of people got really good at guitar hero to beat through the fire and the flames are youtubers who take guitar hero requests and are able to sight-play intensely convoluted songs near flawlessly

[paper-mario-wiki]

[saddest-cat-hours]

Me on my way to eat your ass

[cobaltdays-deactivated20210208]

Was that caption really necessary

[whatspeaksofter]

IDK, but the music was