[bitchenbae]

A BLACK GIRL RUNS THIS BLOG BITCH

[porceiaincat]

basically all my posts:

[kaydababiisadist]

Sheeeess baaaaackkkkkkk!!!

Hey yalll 👋🏽. I’m aooo fucking back but I’m actually better than I was when I last posted.

I’m no longer being abused, I’m in a loving healthy happy relationship.

I did move so I’m no longer in Chicago I’m in the east coast.

I am indeed a fat fucking whale tho. I feel in love and felt safe and happy and he actually loved me so much I let my guard down.

Im 200lbs yall 🫣.

[kaydababiisadist]

Did yall miss me? I feel so out of place here sometimes cause like get it together kay. You’re still shit posting on tumblr cause it’s your only safe space 😭.

Like did we think we’d still be here 18 years later still hating who you are as a person and complaining to no one in particular? No. No we did not but here we are.

[kaydababiisadist]

I’m fat again. (175, which is really close to my HW)

I’m moving closer to family. (perfect opportunity to get back on track since I’ll be isolated)

I’m all over the place. (i know this is good for me)

[kaydababiisadist]

It’s the night before my mom died 6 years ago in my arms. All I can feel is the urge to give up because I feel like a failure and burden to everyone. Ik how much it hurts to not have my mom hare with me and it wasn’t her choice so I wouldn’t put my family thru deciphering my post bad letters but it hurts and I just want to escapes and not feel.

I literally saw the life drain from her eyes from her soul.

[stvrlightttze]

We have different priorities here clearly✨🤩

[kaydababiisadist]

I’m drunk with a man I hate 😇

[kaydababiisadist]

What I was wearing when my friend couldn’t stop hitting on me.

[kaydababiisadist]

So last weekend I saw a friend that I’ve known since high school and he was all over me and constantly saying how small I’d gotten.

Couple things:

Yessssssss!!!! I fucking knew I was huge and no one told me anything!!!

Ewwwwwwwwww. I don’t like him like that. He’s almost like a brother or cousin so it was kinda weird how much he was lusting over me.

I was the skinniest girl in our group and was fucking elated all night.

I thought I looked really cute and if I can I’ll post a pic or video.

I had so much fun that night tho. It was so much fun celebrating my best friends birthday.

Also I stopped talking to L for good.

[starving-for-perfection4]

I don’t want to live alone for independence. I want to live alone so that no one can buy me food or make me eat unholy amounts of meat.

[teera-needs-therapy]

Some poc thinspo because I don't see it enough

[kaydababiisadist]

Went to the doctors today cause my arm has been numb for about a week or so and their scale said 155. I’m going to update but it still made me so mad. I should be so much further.

[kaydababiisadist]

I was about to change my gw3 back to 150 cause it would be easier but changed my mind. If I hadn’t gotten comfortable I would have been hit that goal. Time to focus on hitting my ugw by my 30th birthday in October.

I’m pretty much on OMAD and that’s due to finances and that’s kept me from gaining too much. If I can keep focused and pay attention to what I’m showing into my mouth I should hit it easily.

[aneverlastinghalloween]

[hungryattentionwhore]

"my ed isn't that bad and i'm okay with the way my body-"

*seriously considers doing c0k3 to lose weight*

[kaydababiisadist]

Ik we’re not supposed to but last summer when I was in a ski bender was the skinniest I have been in like 5 years. I want it back and I think I’m going to just go full in again

Don’t do d rugs kids. It’s bad and you will have consequences later in life.

Idc about the consequences as I am a full adult and I hate my life.

I will do anything to be under 140 in my adult life

I like going skiing, getting skinny is just an extra bonus.

I can drink more cause i don’t feel drunk.

Gonna go home now and drink 🙂