something south of nothing.

kamber kellum laurel kamberly. he/she bigender insert other things. i like board games one piece jojo other things

[kellumnights]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

1. my fashion sense — i recently took a weeklong trip and packed a bag full of matching clothing that joined into some pretty rad outfits!

2. board games — the blend of resource optimization and social convention easily puts this in my top 5 happy things.

3. messaging apps! i can always reach out to my friends, and they have a habit of reaching out to me. though I don’t always remember to send them, I have a habit of taking pictures of my food or my outfits to show to my friends. it only sometimes works.

4. public transportation. it’s more fuel-efficient than cars and scratches that same planning itch that board games do.

5. the fact that people make an effort to prioritize time with me. sometimes when i’m hanging around a person for long periods of time, i step out to go to the bathroom or something and stare at myself in the mirror and shiver a little giddily.

[kellumnights]

unfortunately I was only able to reblog to like. six people cause all my mutuals are nerds with closed askboxes

[dogpuppy]

[quietwingsinthesky]

its so weird to me that cis people will dislike their name so ardently and yet. not change it. you guys know that’s an option, right. no one can make you keep the shit name your mom gave you. no, not even her.

[qi-mera]

More of you need to learn about these ☝️

[jadenebula]

[caspercryptid]

I feel like not enough people realize that people under enormous strain act really really fucking Weird

[caspercryptid]

If someone is doing things that don't make Sense, try to understand that it is entirely possible that their brain is probably under an enormous weight and fracturing under the pressure. People who have been stabbed will sometimes talk a circle around the fact that they've been stabbed because stress and shock prevent you from recognizing the distress you are in and what you need to do to seek help for it. PTSD will do this also. You will find yourself repeatedly jamming a bag of frozen fruit into the same spot in the freezer where it doesn't fit and keeps falling, over and over and over, focused on nothing but that bag. You will decide that a beanbag chair is 10000% necessary to your life. You will lose your entire shit because you stubbed your toe on a table and that means the whole setup of your furniture is wrong. These are largely harmless examples. People under strain will also hurt themselves and others. Cornered animals bite. And it doesn't heal the bite to go "Hey, are you okay?" But it might get you to an animal that stops biting, so you can start to heal. And before you had an animal that bit, you probably had an animal that kept doing shit you didn't understand as stress signals

[notaplaceofhonour]

will never not be mad about gig economy apps making a 4 star rating mean “unacceptable quality”

[notaplaceofhonour]

Doordash will suspend you below 4.2 stars.

Uber drivers can be suspended at 4.6 stars.

Lyft drivers risk suspension under 4.8 stars.

Even for apps where they don’t have a publicly stated minimum, their algorithms will bury you.

4 stars does not mean 4 stars. It means 1.4 stars.

If you give a person a 4 star rating, to these companies, you are not saying “I was mostly satisfied with the service, but there’s always room for improvement”—which is what 4 stars should mean—you are voting for them to be fired.

[notaplaceofhonour]

Genuinely, do not ever give people 4 star ratings on gig service apps for any reason that is not a safety issue where their continuation on the app could seriously hurt people.

If someone gives you “just OK” service where you don’t want to give them 5 stars, but you don’t actively hate their existence and hope they die, just don’t rate them.

[byjove]

‘Nuclear Family Month’ is so funny as a concept. I have never seen a nuclear family worth celebrating.

[dragonessmiralis]

The Addams

[byjove]

Do Grandmama, Uncle Fester and the rotating cast of possibly existent cousins mean nothing to you? 😔

[dragonessmiralis]

I may in fact be stupid

[byjove]

Every Pride Month I’m once again struck by the ridiculousness of the “marriage is between a man and a woman, as (the Christian) God intended” and similar ‘marriage is a (somehow a solely) Christian institution’ rhetoric. Your God did not invent marriage. Your God was late to the scene on the whole marriage thing. It existed long before the Old Testament, even. Which is not to say that marriage as a Christian rite (which was a later historical construct) is not valid, I believe everyone has a right to practice their religious beliefs surrounding marriage but, again, most religions and societies have some concept of marriage and your idea of Christian marriage entered the game way later than some of these.

The concept of marriage in American society is a legal construct, not a religious one.

(Also, side note, Christian marriage being between “one man and one woman” is controversial even in Christian theological debate because polygyny is never definitively condemned in the text. They only decided on the one man and one woman thing in 673 and not everyone agreed.)

[sailermoon]

this is how new yorkers @ mamdani

[sailermoon]

[yourcalamity]

tumblr bitch: liking creepypasta makes you a freak!

me: **growls really hard**

jeff: its ok theyre just jealous babe…

me: i know jeff, i know

slendy: **slaps my fat juicy ass**

me: NOT NOW SLENDY JEFF AND I ARE HAVING A MOMENT

slendy: youre so boring **murders a whole family**

me: **sighs**

police: **en route**

jeff: **the killer**

[lizardzapz]

Ryland Grace has quite possibly become the first tumblr asexyman. For years we have only theorized of such a phenomenon. Groundbreaking, good work everyone.

[shamebats]

Oh come on lady, you can't deny a man his gaycation

[shamebats]

You must surrender yourself mind, body and soul to the gaycation or be destroyed

[shamebats]

Someone on reddit already suggested a sapphibbatical

[the-haiku-bot]

Someone on reddit

already suggested a

sapphibbatical

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[mechanica1-hands]

how could you leave out the best part—the aquarium bit

[shamebats]

"become a fish" (gay)

[ladyananas]

men will jump through an entire circus' worth of hoops rather than admitting they're bi

[helpless--romantics]

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

The level of mental hoops that guy had to jump through to say to his wife, "No, honey! Of course I wouldn't be cheating on you! Sex during gaycations doesn't count!"

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

Holy fucking shit! It gets trippier!

I mean, I feel horrible for the OP and her SIL...but "surrender to the gaycation" made me laugh way more than I should have.

[emilynyaaa]

this is an insane story

[flickering-leaves]

“Some men never return”

Helpppppp 😭

[brightlotusmoon]

[harperhug]

Um…here’s the reddit link? I’m speechless.

[handageddon]

Don't worry honey, all the other men on gaycation aren't real people and they stop existing after. Hey, where's all the homophoboa coming from suddenly?

[mananabuffins]

That's the beauty of the gaycation!

[authoratmidnight]

It get wilder. I only found out about this b/c of a youtube video reading the Gaycation post but, this isn't even the first one.

7 years ago someone posted this-

And 5 years a different user posted this-

What is happening with these people??? What weird ass cult did they find??

[catboy-artist]

I read the shithead guy’s rambling in Nagito Komaeda’s voice

[not100bees]

I feel like my crocodile mom can protect my wife and girlfriend and my friend and that random old woman from the other crocodile while I rescue the money.

[thestrawberrydreams]

Inclusive language is for everyone!!

[literaryera]

I keep hearing John Green say he's retired from working and lemme just say John Green is the least retired retired person I've ever seen.

[sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog]

I am retired!!! I retired in October of 2017 and have kept my promise not to exchange my labor for money.

Since 2017, I have only done stuff that I thought was interesting or useful regardless of whether it pays, because we have more than enough money, and despite what billionaires might tell you, there is literally no difference between "more than enough" and "much more than enough."

So I no longer work for money. But in retirement one must keep busy, which is why I have taken on an unpaid gig as the social media intern for a coffee and tea business that donates 100% of its profit to charity.

I also sometimes travel to universities and other places to speak in support of Partners in Health and global access to tuberculosis care, and sometimes I write books because writing makes me happy, and every Tuesday I make a video on vlogbrothers, and I make a podcast about the world cup with my friends from high school, and so on, but none of these things constitutes work. These are just Retirement Projects, which are essential to a happy retirement.

[viralfrog]

[original-character-chaos]

[theconcealedweapon]