[slab-o-meat]

*over the loudspeaker at ikea* FIRST BLOOD

[amongthespaghetti]

i think if i, in the flesh, heard that in an ikea some primal part of me would break out and smash a norrnäs over the closest person’s head

[i-am-a-fish]

happy tuesday im so happy it’s tuesday if it were any other day id be so very sad

[toomuchdickfort]

Oh boy should we tel them?

[i-am-a-fish]

tell me whab? (:

[octobersfeast]

THAT TUESDAYS ARE GREAT HAHAHAHAHHHHHH………

[i-am-a-fish]

i know!!!!! they make me so happy! :D

[i-am-a-fish]

anyway it’s time for bed so goodnight! see yall tomorrow!

[i-am-a-fish]

good morning!! happy tuesday!

[you-fool-you-buffoon]

Hey bud I’ve got some bad news.

[i-am-a-fish]

oh no bad news D: ?! how could something bad happen on a tuesday???

[honey-dew-baby]

It’s Thursday. I’m sorry but I couldn’t let you go on like this. It’s not Tuesday. It hasn’t been Tuesday for a while.

[idkiguessiamatable]

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS! LET HIM BE HAPPY!!!

[i-am-a-fish]

t.. thurs… wha?

[screaming-like-it-is-1999]

IT’S TUESDAY FISH

[your-siggy]

QUIT LYING TO THEM.. THEY MUST KNOW THE TRUTH.

[i-am-a-fish]

tues….day? .right??

[mibicycle]

Of course!!!!

[i-am-a-fish]

TUESDAY!! :’D !!!!

[inkybinky]

Yes fish!!! Tuesday!!!!

[i-am-a-fish]

oh that’s so great to hear i can rest easy now!!goodnight see you all tomorrow! ♥️♥️

[thebongdevil]

hey fish,,,,, it won’t be tuesday forever

[i-am-a-fish]

uhh, good morning to you too i guess ): ,

and of course it can’t be tuesday forever that would be ridiculous! it’s just that TODAY is tuesday. Happy tuesday!!!!!

[tour-of-torterra]

Hey fish what other days are there?

[i-am-a-fish]

to be honest i don’t really know yet! anyway it was a very lovely tuesday i’ll see yall tomorrow!!!!

[hraewordsmith]

can’t wait!!!! if you’re seeing this in the morning, happy tuesday fish!!

[i-am-a-fish]

i AM seeing it in the morning, on tuesday morning!! happy tuesday!!! today has felt really long but i love tuesday so its very good

[i-am-a-fish]

i appreciate your concern but i don’t really have any issue with this. anyway see you tomorrow!!

[cookies4evam8-deactivated202108]

I cannot express the fear I get from seeing more and more from this ongoing post 

[i-am-a-fish]

good morn happie tuesday :D

[earthdad]

me: send me pics

you: what u wanna see?(;

me: spiderman

you: what?

me:

[i-hate-chick-fil-a]

[angeban]

[officialrung-deactivated2020010]

you know whats great about little kids? its so easy to make their day. they ask me what my dogs name is and i say pikachu and they go

[paper-mario-wiki]

if u ever find a genie and you’re really craving a dessert that looks like this:

do NOT say “i’d like a lifetime supply of raspberry crowns”

while this is, in fact, the name of the pastry, it’s ALSO the name of a species of wasp for some reason. the genie, being a nasty trickster, will no doubt give you a bunch of wasps.

[shitload-of-muses]

this is an oddly specific post are you ok

[protempore11]

thx for the warning phew

[chaoticgood-m-deactivated202202]

spiderman is so fucking funny dude saves like an entire country and then he goes home at the end of the day and opens his fridge and hes got like 1 egg and a half empty can of arizona tea no matter how old he is or what comic hes from thats just how peter parker lives

[theinfiknight]

Somebody post the “we have money. Oh thank god” screenshot

[beholdthemem]

Your wish is my command

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[eorliingas]

literally desaturate any frame from john m.ulaney’s latest standup and it looks like it’s from a variety show in 1935

[eorliingas]

[fiftythousandfrozenfoxes]

I’m sorry but variety shoes did not exist in 1935. Or even 45

[eorliingas]

[lesbian-bowser]

done broke my toes lads

[mamaluigi]

pics or it didn’t happen

[lesbian-bowser]

[mamaluigi]

[pokemon-i-choose-you]

Excuse me?

[lordpaafington]

[expcake]

pika pika, shitlips

[flowerb-0y]

Hmm

[mattibee]

[revolutionarytea]

Some guy in Ancient Greece, pointing at a perfectly climbable mountain: There are gods up there!

The rest of Ancient Greece: Sick, no need to fact check that 

[the-memedaddy]

Meirl

[stilt-fox]

In light of recent events

[compulsive]

[18-3829b-19-deactivated20190505]