AIDEN

love, an emotion characterized by strong feelings of affection for another arising out of kinship, companionship, admiration, or benevolence. In a related sense, “love” designates a benevolent concern for the good or welfare of others.

[kewlkidzrule]

i lowkey feel kinda lonely because i barely see any detransitioned men as a detransitioned man myself

most detransitioners i see are detrans women. not that there's anything wrong with that but like.. still

any detrans men out there, perhaps?? 👀👀

[detransition]

Gender Detransition: a path towards self-acceptance (free pdf)  available in english, german, french, dutch, spanish & swedish thinking about detransition? you are not alone

[detransition]

Gender Detransition: a path towards self-acceptance (free pdf) available in english, german, french, dutch, spanish & swedish

thinking about detransition? you are not alone

[detranspositivity]

I really dislike the narrative that detrans people were “never really trans”…really? how do you, an internet stranger, get to decide what someone’s identity “really” was? being trans means many different things to many different people, so to say that someone was never “really trans” because they changed their mind at some point kinda implies that you think there is a “right way” to be trans.

well, newsflash, there is no “right way”. If someone believed they were trans, lived as a trans person, experienced the ups and downs of gender dysphoria/euphoria, went thru the trouble of social and medical transition and through that journey, that person said “wait…I don’t think this fits me anymore.” seems pretty trans to me.

and that’s okay, it’s okay to change your mind. you were trans.

or if you want to say “I wasn’t trans I was x thing instead” that’s also okay.

what isn’t okay is to police other people’s language about their journey. to police someone’s identity because it makes you uncomfortable. like it or not, real trans people detransition. whether they decide they are actually cis, trans but in a different way, or another identity that fits them better is up to that individual person and doesn’t invalidate their previous LIVED EXPERIENCE as a trans person.

If your knee jerk reaction to someone saying they were trans for a period of time, then decided to detransition is “well you were never trans at all!” mayhaps examine why that’s the first thing you think to say, instead of something a bit more constructive or positive. Like what happened to “oh I’m glad you were able to find an identity that worked for you” as an example.

For those who are detrans reading this, if you needed someone to tell you this. you were really trans. you weren’t faking it and you weren’t deceiving anyone. you don’t deserve to have your experiences devalued or seen as unimportant. Whatever your situation or circumstances were/are, it was real, because it was real for you. and that’s all that matters.

[plushself]

here's my redesigned detrans flag! I wanted to show the intersection btwn detransition and transition, as well as a variety of ways detrans ppl may identify.

[bd9wirksissbiska-deactivated202]

its important to me as a detrans woman to be vocal about it. its important to me as a detrans woman who initially only had radfems to talk to about detransition, because i couldnt find a single trans inclusive detrans person for over a year, to make sure other people know they have options.

radfems arent your aly if you're questioning your gender. they dont have your best interest at heart. they dont care about helping you explore who you are, theyre only interested in sucking you in to be another transmisogynistic pawn for their violent ideology.

if you're trans/nonbinary now, but are wondering if it isnt right for you, know that you have options. you can talk to me. there are people who have not done a 180 into bigotry who are here to support you.

please reblog, do not just like, this post.

i dont have a large platform. i want this to get spread. i want to remove terfs from the forefront of detrans/reidentification awareness & support. they cannot continue to be the first contact for questioning people.

i am begging you, yes you personally, to please reblog this, and comment or reply in the tags if you're a safe, trans-inclusive detransitioned or reidentified person to approach.

[neckspike-deactivated20240222]

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with giving something a try and deciding “ah, this isn’t right for me after all.”

Humans are messy and complicated, it’s fine.

[plushself]

as a detransitioner it means a lot to finally see some positivity about it

[kewlkidzrule]

i'm a detrans man and detrans people need love and validation too

[plushself]

here's my redesigned detrans flag! I wanted to show the intersection btwn detransition and transition, as well as a variety of ways detrans ppl may identify.

[detransitioningisvalid]

Hey detrans men - you are not alone. Other AMAB folks have detransitioned or desisted too, even if theyre quiet about it. You belong!

[undertalepilled]

I wish people treated queerness as breaking the rules of the dominant cis-hetero patriarchy so you can authentically be yourself. Instead of adhering to a new slightly less restrictive set of rules which you will deride other people for not following (basically whatever label discourse is now flaring up)

[wtchgrrl]

shoutout to anyone who can’t look up shit about their identity without finding discourse posts we’ll get through this together

[undertalepilled]

I wish people treated queerness as breaking the rules of the dominant cis-hetero patriarchy so you can authentically be yourself. Instead of adhering to a new slightly less restrictive set of rules which you will deride other people for not following (basically whatever label discourse is now flaring up)

[bloooosday]

sleepover on the floor

[sugarpen]

Turns out on one of their adventures they became sweet snacks 🍬

[ponchusjbonchus]

my little snorbie (ignore the dialtown narrator. inside joke)

[wiltenjoyer]

I really like how Herriman turned out

[gayflagblog]

Gay Man Flag

Russian /  Росси́я, Portuguese /  Português, Spanish /  Español, Polish /  Polski, French /  Français

Many people are unhappy with the current popular proposed flag because of a variety of reasons (no meaning behind the stripes, seemed to be “lipstick lesbian but blue for boys instead of pink for girls”, etc.) so I decided to make a similar proposal to address some of these issues.

[ THESE FLAGS AND STRIPE/COLOR MEANINGS ARE “APPROVED” BY THE CREATOR OF THE ORIGINAL FLAG, meaning they don’t mind that I’ve made this proposal to address the issues with theirs. We’re two separate people working on our own blogs, if you have a problem with them/their flag, I can’t help you. ]

1. First is that I’ve added meanings to each stripe and to each overall color on the flag.

(Note: You might have seen a different version of the flag with the stripe meanings floating around that has “GNC & Trans Men” on the white stripe and non-green text on the bottom. This is the old version, I’ve changed the wording because people don’t know how to not be cruel to others & because black on darker purple is hard on some people’s eyes. That’s the only other version.)

Stripe meanings were inspired by my personal research of LGBT+ history, my (and others) experiences as gay men, and the meanings on Gilbert Baker’s original rainbow flag which I love dearly and hold close to my heart, this flag is not meant to replace or erase it in any way! I would love for them to be used in tandem like I personally do.

The green (Community) and teal (Joy) in the flag represent Nature. I thought this was important because love between men is often seen as “unnatural” in the eyes of society and in religion. Furthermore, gay men have historically used green flowers and plants (Carnations, hyacinths, etc.) to symbolize our love, reinforcing our connection with Nature.

The white stripe is adopted from the Trans Pride flag because trans, nb, and GNC men are often erased or talked over and need explicit representation. We have a lot of unaddressed and blatant Transphobia, internalized Homophobia, and Toxic Masculinity directed towards GNC/non-cis men in our community that we need to address and resolve.

I am aware that a white middle stripe may make people think it’s too similar to other flags but at this point in time, where the battle for what should be basic human rights for trans people is ongoing, even in LGBT spaces, it’s more important than ever to remember the crucial roles our trans and GNC family have played in building our history and to honor them.

The purple (Fortitude) and indigo (Diversity) in the flag represent diversity in  presentation, relationships, & life experience. We’re so often stereotyped as all fitting into these neat little categories, especially by those who choose to fetishize us & by non-MLM, but in reality there are so so many different ways to be a man and so many ways to be a man who loves or  who is in a relationship with other men, and this needs to be emphasized.

Purple is a mix of blue and red, and seeing as common criticism of other gay man flag proposals is “oh blue for boy? bleh”, I decided to have a light blue stripe leading into a deep purple to symbolize how some of us might be stereotypical, some of us might not be, and some of us are in-between or fluid. Regardless, we should all be celebrated and respected.

This flag is inclusive of all gay men. This includes Aro, Questioning/Unsure, NB, Ace, & Gay men that are Gender Non Conforming, be you Masc, Fem,  or Androgynous in any way! Same goes for gay men of any religious background.

2. There are also many other versions/variants of the flag for those who would like them, please note that all of them still have the same meanings & symbolism as the original. Some of them are shown above.

You can view all of them & get separate images by clicking the link above and at the bottom of the post, please check that before proposing a different version to see if it already exists.

3. All of my flags are free to use for commercial and personal use, just please at least try to credit or link back/source to this post so it’s meanings don’t get lost. 

(Just for the record, I am a trans gay disabled guy and I consult my GNC/NB/non-MLM [specifically Lesbian/WLW because of the similarities] followers on here and on Twitter frequently. If you think any language here is incorrect, please feel free to inform me, but I will consult others and hold polls before making major changes)

4. I am, and have always been, open to discussion on the flag but please read this entire post & at least search a little to see if I’ve already talked about that issue with someone else. If you’re intentionally rude, homo/transphobic, or you just don’t like the flag, I encourage you to find another flag proposal. Please don’t be like some of the people in the notes.

I am continually making new, improved versions of this flag! You can get similar updates and also interact with me on my Twitter @GayFlagTwit

[ ALL FLAG VERSIONS CAN BE FOUND HERE! ]

( If the link is broken, go to: “https://gayflagblog.tumblr.com/flagvariants” )

Edited 5/9/22, please check blog for the most recent and up to date post!

[kewlkidzrule]

woah look guys it's the dude that made a flag that represents me

[floral-ashes]

Someone anonymously messaged me to tell me that writing about detrans folks makes me a traitor to trans people, because all detrans people want to push conversion therapy on us and forcibly detransition us.

That’s precisely the kind of narrative that ends up pushing detransitioners into the arms of TERFs and the religious far-right.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with detransitioning. Sometimes people realize that transitioning no longer suits them, or never really did. And that’s fine.

When we systematically push them away regardless of their politics, we make people feel like the only places they can get support are among transphobes. That’s not a good thing. Building de/trans solidarity is an critical tool for disarming anti-trans movements.