Words I Didn’t Say

my collection of truths

[kiananicolecowger]

coupons

you kept coupons 

and i kept a ring

tokens of our past loves

stowed away 

by the people 

we thought 

we could be

- k.c.

[kiananicolecowger]

done.

I think I can finally mean

‘I’m done’

because I finally outgrew the girl

who let it start.

- k.c.

[kiananicolecowger]

loose ends

we

are a collection of words left unsaid

that really

need to be heard

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

willing

neither of us were willing to cut the ties

but one of us had to

for your sake

i’m sorry it was me

for mine

i’m glad it was

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

i’m done tripping over ‘love’

and falling for mind games

                       - no more second chances

k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

you said you had to look out for yourself

but where does it leave me

if we’re both watching

your back

                                         - knives

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

xo

maybe we’re forever after three years down the road or maybe we’re a story with an ending never told either way i don’t regret you

                         xo  

                         ~ a girl you used to know

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

strong

i became strong when he said i was weak

i became brave when he said i should hide

i became whole when he said i was broken

and i became me when i said goodbye

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

i do today

i don’t want to need you

but i do today

just to hear your voice

for you to say it’ll be okay

to be wrapped in your arms

for you to hug the pain away

cause ten months of hurt

is quite a price to pay

i’m just twenty one

and the doctors don’t know what to say

i’m a mess in my car

wish i could just drive away

end up on your porch

with the sun’s last ray

no i don’t want to need you

but i do today

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

journey

maybe by finding ourselves

we will find our way back to each other

- k.c.

[kiananicolecowger]

better

better together

or better apart

whenever i ask

my mind says

‘trust your heart’

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

heal

when you hurt,

you destroy.

but when you hold,

you are a haven.

and when you heal,

you are the miracle this world needs.

my darling,

use your light wisely.

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

today

i left you today

no more games will i play

i left you today

wrote our dates on a grave

i left you today

for this strength I have prayed

i left you today

and i walked away

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

you did too

medically i’m a mess. ten months, six specialists and i’m still met with confused stares and disjointed explanations. i’m living in limbo. i’m terrified and i don’t feel like i’m me. in the moments where i can’t breathe and tears are streaming down my cheeks, it’s you that i crave. the arms that kept me safe, the voice that knew what to say and the heart that understood my own. you knew me even when i didn’t. but now i’m facing this alone and i know i’m stronger for it. i’m stronger for it and i’m better for it. but i still miss your smile. your laugh. your whisper. and your everything is going to be alright. i believe in myself, i do. but it was always nice to know that you did too.

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

borrowed time

you and i

live on borrowed time

we’re fire red lips

dripping icy white lies

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

tequila spiked wine

he reached for my hand one time but his fingers weren’t shaped for mine he was four months of love not meant for my script but it was hard to ignore a heartbeat like his

one smile made mine so i ignored all the signs he was tequila spiked wine and i crossed the line

his kiss, his touch his name on my lips

he was five o’clock somewhere and i couldn’t resist

- k. c.

[kiananicolecowger]

unsaid

stacks of letters unsent books of words left unsaid and film reels of memories i can’t seem to forget

three years have passed   since our last i love yous my heart’s drowning in silence if only you knew

- k. c.