sometimes I write for fun

“There are no answers in life. We never know what’ll happen in the future. Isn’t that the beauty of life, without any answer?” - kang yeosang

[kidultfordayz]

No Color (series)

- Theme: Love and soulmates

- first person pov

- main lead character: bang yedam from treasure

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

No Color Part 1

July 11

My alarm rang. 

"It's 5:50 AM, Wake up," my phone said with it's robotic voice. I opened my eyes. Sat up, and stared outside. Watching birds fly in the vast sky with lighter shades around them. 

I got up and got ready for the day. Heated myself a cup of milk to eat along with some bread. Plain bread. Plain.

 I read the checklist I made yesterday for today. It said:

       Things to do today:

          1. Grocery shopping           2. Buy stationary

I finished my breakfast, placed the dirty dishes into the sink, grabbed my bag and left to the first stop, the grocery store. The store was filled with people, yet, there was no vibrant 'thing' to  be seen. 

My mom once reassured me, "You don't have to be rushed. He will come, and the days will be filled with much more Joy. Patience daughter." I repeated to myself: patience, patience, patience. Have patience, and live until you can meet him. It was as if my sole purpose to live was to meet him. My mom would tell me the same stories before I sleep. "One day you will find your soulmate. And when you do, you will be able to see colors! More vibrant shades, rather than the same shades you see everyday. Only then you can realize the beauty of colors and life, but with your soulmate." Mother would tell me stories of how she met my father. Everyday she would tell me different stories and describe the colors she sees with her best efforts. Thanks to her I aced my english exams. 

I miss those days...

My shopping basket is filled with milk, instant noodles, eggs and fruits. I headed over to the cashier, paid and left the grocery store; holding one bag with my left hand, and my phone with the right. I double checked what I needed from the stationary store as I walked towards it, my second (and last) destination. 

Kring Kring, the store bells rang as I got in.

"Hey Evie! Today isn't your shift, why are you here?"

"Oh, I needed to buy some school supplies, the new school year is starting you see."

"Heard you move schools?"

"Yeah. tuitions were too expensive in the old one"

"Alrighty, since I'm on shift today, I'll give you extra discounts"

I smiled, and went to aisle 2, where most school supplies are. I stared at the pen section. There were so many different choices to choose from, but I never got the difference. Probably the name of the brand? Here it says black, and there it's blue. I normally buy from the blue pens because it's the first ones I see. I took 2 pens, 5 notebooks and a correction tape. 

"Is that all?"

"Yep, how much?"

"With the discount it'll be 30”

"Here you go, thanks, I'll see you later!”

I used my earphones and played my favorite Taylor Swift songs.  I walked out of the store and started heading home; and that was when I first saw him. A figure walked past me. I stopped. He was tall, wearing a mask so I couldn't catch his face. But I know for a fact that I saw something. The fire hydrant in front of me changed. It wasn't the normal dark shade I saw, instead it was a burning shade. Is he the one? 

I looked back and saw him walk away. I chased after him, but he was too far ahead. I stopped, caught my breath, and ran again. But he crossed the road too quickly, I couldn't catch up. But I did hear his name. The name his friend called. The name he responded to. The name that brought butterflies to my stomach. Yedam. 

[kidultfordayz]

No Color (series)

- Theme: Love and soulmates

- first person pov

- main lead character: bang yedam from treasure

—————————————————————————————

No Color Part 1

July 11

My alarm rang. 

“It’s 5:50 AM, Wake up,” my phone said with it’s robotic voice. I opened my eyes. Sat up, and stared outside. Watching birds fly in the vast sky with lighter shades around them. 

I got up and got ready for the day. Heated myself a cup of milk to eat along with some bread. Plain bread. Plain.

 I read the checklist I made yesterday for today. It said:

       Things to do today:

          1. Grocery shopping           2. Buy stationary

I finished my breakfast, placed the dirty dishes into the sink, grabbed my bag and left to the first stop, the grocery store. The store was filled with people, yet, there was no vibrant ‘thing’ to  be seen. 

My mom once reassured me, “You don’t have to be rushed. He will come, and the days will be filled with much more Joy. Patience daughter.” I repeated to myself: patience, patience, patience. Have patience, and live until you can meet him. It was as if my sole purpose to live was to meet him. My mom would tell me the same stories before I sleep. “One day you will find your soulmate. And when you do, you will be able to see colors! More vibrant shades, rather than the same shades you see everyday. Only then you can realize the beauty of colors and life, but with your soulmate.” Mother would tell me stories of how she met my father. Everyday she would tell me different stories and describe the colors she sees with her best efforts. Thanks to her I aced my english exams. 

I miss those days…

My shopping basket is filled with milk, instant noodles, eggs and fruits. I headed over to the cashier, paid and left the grocery store; holding one bag with my left hand, and my phone with the right. I double checked what I needed from the stationary store as I walked towards it, my second (and last) destination. 

Kring Kring, the store bells rang as I got in.

“Hey Evie! Today isn’t your shift, why are you here?”

“Oh, I needed to buy some school supplies, the new school year is starting you see.”

“Heard you move schools?”

“Yeah. tuitions were too expensive in the old one”

“Alrighty, since I’m on shift today, I’ll give you extra discounts”

I smiled, and went to aisle 2, where most school supplies are. I stared at the pen section. There were so many different choices to choose from, but I never got the difference. Probably the name of the brand? Here it says black, and there it’s blue. I normally buy from the blue pens because it’s the first ones I see. I took 2 pens, 5 notebooks and a correction tape. 

“Is that all?”

“Yep, how much?”

“With the discount it’ll be 30”

"Here you go, thanks, I’ll see you later!”

I used my earphones and played my favorite Taylor Swift songs.  I walked out of the store and started heading home; and that was when I first saw him. A figure walked past me. I stopped. He was tall, wearing a mask so I couldn’t catch his face. But I know for a fact that I saw something. The fire hydrant in front of me changed. It wasn’t the normal dark shade I saw, instead it was a burning shade. Is he the one? 

I looked back and saw him walk away. I chased after him, but he was too far ahead. I stopped, caught my breath, and ran again. But he crossed the road too quickly, I couldn’t catch up. But I did hear his name. The name his friend called. The name he responded to. The name that brought butterflies to my stomach. Yedam. 

[kidultfordayz]

i started trying out doing digital art for fun and i’ve learned that drawing ain’t it 😔✊🏼

[kidultfordayz]

Youth

Small poem written by :)

ps. i have no idea if what i wrote is true, i myself am still in my youth so im not sure hehe :))) ------------------------------------------------------------

Youth. The days when we were able 

to do anything we liked. Small plant.

When others opinions weren’t 

Important. No. Maybe it was.

The days when we burned the 

Midnight oil, to finish overdue

Tasks. Perturbed. The days we 

Began thinking of our future, funny.

Making mistakes. Blaming others. 

Enjoying everyday with an easy mind.

Beautiful. Beautiful it was. The plant

Started blooming its flowers.

The days when you were scared to be 

different. You would try your best to fit 

into society. Pathetic. If only then, someone 

told me that flowers bloom at their own pace.

I may have bloomed my flowers slower

Then others. But I know, that

My flowers are the prettiest.

Elegant. Immature. Beautiful.

[kidultfordayz]

people choose to give up because to them it’s the easiest thing they can do. For some people giving up is better than not meeting your own expectations and ending up disappointed at yourself; it’d be a lie if i said that i don’t think that way either,,, but after watching this video where Jongho said that you won’t know the results until you try,,, it made me really think that maybe I am capable of doing things outside of the box but I’m just too scared to discover those new skills. Starting from today i’m going to start going outside of my comfort zone and challenge myself!! I hope u can too 💙

[kidultfordayz]

Home

(This was a spoken poetry i wrote for school back in seventh grade hehe)

When you begin something, you can feel all sorts of emotions,

 Like when you’re told to perform something you did not prepare

 In front of the entire school.

You will feel uneasy, awkward, nervous, anxious,

You will feel this indescribable weight, weighing on your shoulders,

Every step you take, the weight increases.

You will hear the wind whisper, “Hello? Aren’t you going to say something?” 

You will notice everything is shaking, the ceilings, walls, floor.

You will find yourself drowning in an ocean of emotions,

Screaming in desperation; Help!

And the only word that is dragged up out of your mouth, “h-h-h-hi?”

And you run to escape embarrassment.

But once you’ve overcome the ocean,

You will see a shore, far ahead welcoming you after swimming for years, and years.

You can see the bright sand like mirrors reflecting your journey

You will feel safe; you will be home.

The home that has been there waiting to help you,

No, it wasn’t hiding, it has always been there for you

The waves just hindered the “hello’s” between home and you.

Your heart will pound faster than ever, 

Like the wind chasing the waves. 

Happiness will chase anxiety away, 

You will be relieved to say 

“Finally, I found home!”

When the night comes, you will tell the stars your journey, 

You will talk about how easy it was.

You will show the clouds your scars,

The scars left from the pain, 

the one’s you’re proud of. 

You will scream out loud, “I’ve escaped! I’m home!”

But there’s still this heavy feeling on your shoulders,

It weighs more and more as you talk about your journey. 

You can feel something twisting your stomach,

Again and again to get the truth out.

Fear starts to chase you back into the deep end.

Day, after day, you will forget how happy you were to find home.

You won’t pay attention anymore.

You will think, “eh whatever, since I found home it will always be there for me.” 

But your carelessness will seep into the ocean

Like black oil tainting the blue marine

And you’ve only ever thought about yourself

That you’re blind to notice what you’ve done

Just because you think home is permanent for you,

Just because you think home will never leave you.

One morning, you’ll wake up to the sound of a thunderstorm. You look at your surroundings,

You’re back here in the ocean.

The shore has left you.

Home has left you. I have left you. 

[chibird]

One day at a time, and this little ghostie will be here for you. 💛

Chibird store | Positive Pin Club | Instagram

[kidultfordayz]

Standards

(Another short  poem written by me hehe

 [ps. no one can and will never be perfect])

“Don’t do that” 

“You have to do this better”

“Why can’t you be like the others”

“Act normal, blend with everyone else”

Why do these words repeat themselves?

The standards are set too high,

Trying to reach the standard with;

the longest ladder, the tallest shoes, the highest skyscraper 

Will never work. 

No matter the effort made, 

You’ll never leave that position.

No matter how much times you force yourself,

You won't be able to become someone else.

But I just simply can’t accept myself.

[choi-san-deactivated20210323]

[kidultfordayz]

his smile is enough to make me smile the entire month :)

[kidultfordayz]

YANAN IS SO CUTE AXJOENSHB anyways i hope everyone has/ is having a great day!!

[kidultfordayz]

Kidult

(A little “poem” written by me, inspired by seventeen’s woozi) 

They call her the mature one. 

Takes responsibility for what she does,

Like the bright sun,

Who shines throughout the day.

But just like how the sun sets at night,

The girl isn’t as bright. 

The rain starts. 

Overthinking. Insecure. Lonely. 

The next day the sun shines brighter than before, 

She smiles. Laughs. 

Like nothing happened. 

At day, she is an adult.

But at night she becomes a kid,

Who needs comfort. 

It's okay to be a kidult sometimes.

[jeogiyall]

feeling curious... atinys reblog with your star sign and how you got into ateez 🧡

[kidultfordayz]

i’m an aquarius!! the first time i saw ateez was when i was watching a music show on tv and they were performing wave, i was so into that song!! i added it to my playlist, then around a year later i watched an interview ateez did and they were so funny 🤧🤧 so i checked out their latest song which was answer AND I FELL IN LOVE SO FAST, but i had to make sure i like their music before i stan them so i listened to their entire discography AND ALL OF THEIR SONGS WERE MY TYPE!!! ateez is the fastest group i fell in love with and the fastest group that became my ult group, lov these boys so much!! 💙💙

(i’m new in tumblr so i’m not so sure if i did this right 😬😬)

[kidultfordayz]

Kidult. Combining the words kid and adult was such a brilliant thing to do. For me, the word ‘kidult’ means that people can act mature sometimes, but they also might be in pain and secretly crying like a kid too. If you think about it, many people are kidults and that is okay! Emotions are normal, so if you want to cry like a kid sometimes, it is ALWAYS okay ❤️ Thank you woozi and seventeen for always making us feel comforted 💙💙

[kidultfordayz]

I’ve been thinking and decided that i’ll mostly post my writings here; i won’t post kpop as much, but maybe i will in the near future but at the moment i think i will just post some of my writings :)

[kidultfordayz]

ateez being their own translators 🤩

[kidultfordayz]

hii!! i’m very new to this app and i’m so excited to start posting and interact with other people ☺️ i’ll need to get use to the app first but can’t wait till my old ass gets use to this app :))