@kiisuuumii - Tumblr Blog

#for d #kiisuuumii #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #dark academia #literature #poeticstories #poetry #poem #lit #poetblr #twcpoetry #writers on tumblr #writing #writeblr #poets on tumblr

#to you?#kiisuuumii #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #literature #poetry #poem #quote #writeblr #journal #diary #dark academia #lit #poetblr #(does any of this matter anymore?)

#kiisuuumii #spilled thoughts #dark academia #literature #lit #quote #poetry #poem #writing #diary #journal #poetblr #writeblr #take care of it.#take care of yourself to take care of it.

#kiisuuumii #spilled ink #dark academia #literature #spilled thoughts #lit #poetry #poem #writing #journal #diary #quote #poetblr #writeblr #what am i now because of you?#(who would i be without you?)

#kiisuuumii #poeticstories #poetblr #lit #literature #poetry #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #writers on tumblr #writing #writeblr #poets on tumblr #dark academia #diary #journal #i don't want to die with anyone else.#in that way i will be yours for the rest of eternity.#will you let me be?

i'm loved, and happy. what a wild, wild feeling. it scares me, the fragility of what i have. how do i hold something i never learnt to handle? i'm terrified.

you might not believe it when i say this, but when i read this, so much of my own joy swelled within my heart. that you are loved and happy makes me happier than you might realize.

unfortunately, i don't know the answer to your question; i have never held love long enough to learn how to carry it, and to carry it gently.

however, i will tell you to allow your fear. allow it to guide you to your other fears, where you can then decide what it is you fear most. let that be what drives you to always choose the direction your heart is pulling you, even when it is through difficult and treacherous terrain. let your love guide you. it will never lead you astray, no matter what the end may come to look like.

we only have so much time. what use is there in holding back?

#?#all of my love to you my friend #always.#i'm wishing you so much prosperity #and so many more days and months and years of happiness.#♥️

part of my fear is from lifelong food and housing insecurity so I can't do much to improve my health or how much time I have, but thank you for your words

please do what you can then. i know that trying to eat healthy, and to eat in general, is... not cheap.

but beyond taking care of yourself physically, please also do what you can to take care of yourself mentally and emotionally. just as much as food has an influence on our health and longevity, so does our nonphysical wellbeing.

#?#i would throw some scientific studies in here as i'm prone to do wherever i can but i know that probably wouldn't be particularly helpful #probably.#but again i'm wishing you so much wealth anon #both monetarily and emotionally and spiritually.

the person I miss seems afraid to speak to me directly as well, but I'm not sure why. I fear running out of time because of my health declining, but I try to express my care for them into the void where they may see it one day. I may never know what they feel, but I hope they are happy and will find me if they need to

my condolences to you regarding your health, and i hope for nothing short of a miracle; you'll be in my thoughts for as long as i live, and i mean it.

and i hold my own faith that they will one day see how much you care. perhaps not necessarily in the words you throw out into the void, but surely in their memories of you when they look back, even in the most difficult moments of the past. i know i have seen it with regards to memories of my person when i have looked back, even with how much hurt that had been inflicted.

we may never know how the other feels for as long as we still live, but to hope they are well, and are taking care of themselves, and are happy are all we can do. that, and to take care of ourselves in turn - for them, for everyone that loves us. but i do wish there was more that we could do, and more that i could tell you.

#?#take care of yourself as best as you can friend.#not to lecture you for you've probably already heard it many many times but #be sure to drink anywhere between 2-3 liters of water #take a comprehensive multivitamin #eat so many vegetables and fruits #and make sure you're hitting the daily recommended intakes of your macronutrients.#i'm a stickler for nutrition which is why i say all of this but #if not for yourself please take care of yourself for the ones that love you.

I anyways wonder if this blog is the person I miss (who won't talk to me directly) that I seek closure with, but I know it's probably just another person going through the same thing. I wish I could say goodbye to them before I run out of time.

it's funny, because for the briefest moment i seriously wondered if you are the person i miss, whom i am too afraid to speak directly to. i doubt we are the people either of us wish we were.

but i would like to say that, when it comes to telling someone they are thought of and missed, and might always be missed, there is no such thing as running out of time. even if you fear that they never want to hear from you again, that they never want to think of you again, i think we, as humans, must let the people in our lives, past and present, know that they are thought of and missed, even if only indirectly. we have so little time on this earth, alive at the same time; you don't know what will take us from each other. so i am of the opinion that you must tell the people you love that you love them, while you still can, as much as you can.

i'm not necessarily encouraging you to reach out to your person, for only you can best make judgements on your situation and its current circumstances. but i do encourage you to allow yourself to say, even if only to just yourself, that you miss them; put it out into the universe, hand it over. and it will reach its intended, one way or another, in one form or another. at least, that is what i believe.

#?#and putting the esoterica aside #to allow yourself the expression sets you free #perhaps not free from your longing (for i feel that may always stay)#but free from your own self-inflicted prisons -#from the weight of everything you wish you had said and asked #and everything you may find yourself wanting to say and ask as time continues to march on.#my thoughts are with you anon.