FORGET ABOUT SMUT. I LOVE IT BUT PLEASE I AM TIRED OF IT. I NEED ANGST. I NEED GUT WRENCHING EMOTIONAL TURMOIL THAT MAKES ME SICK TO MY STOMACH. I NEED TO BAWL JUST FROM THINKING ABOUT IT.
pairings: remus lupin x reader; warnings: insecure reader, self deprecation; word count: 3,1k
au: hihi angels, sorry I have been gone for so long, I have been suffering with writers block for months, but hopefully I am back for good and I could buy your forgiveness with this one shot?
_____________________________________________
It started with a knot in your chest every time Remus looked at you for just a moment too long.
And Merlin, how you hated yourself for it.
You were in love with Remus Lupin. Entirely, hopelessly, heartbreakingly in love with him. The way his hands always shook a little when he was nervous, the way his smile was crooked but so full of warmth, the way he carried so much weight and still tried to make everyone else feel lighter, he was everything.
But you were you.
And that was never enough.
So, after a particularly painful evening of laughing with him in the library and catching yourself staring at his lips more than the page in front of you, you confessed it all to Lily.
Lily was sitting cross-legged on her bed, polishing her nails a soft blush pink when you finally blurted it out.
“I think I’m going to… avoid him.”
Her head snapped up so fast the bottle almost slipped out of her hand.
“Absolutely not.”
You fidgeted with the drawstring of your hoodie, staring at the floor.
“I mean, not forever. Just for a week. Or two. Or, just until I stop feeling so…”
You waved your hands vaguely.
“All… like this.”
Lily blinked slowly. “Like what?”
“Like I’m in love with him,” you whispered.
She froze, a nail polish brush in mid-air. “Well, yes, that part was obvious.”
Your face heated. “It’s not funny, Lily. I can’t— I can’t keep doing this.”
“Doing what?” she asked, softer now.
You dropped onto her rug and leaned your head back against her mattress.
“Being around him. Looking at him. Feeling like this and knowing he doesn’t, he wouldn’t, feel that way. He deserves someone who isn’t…”
Your voice cracked.
“…me.”
Lily’s expression crumpled. “Oh, sweetheart.” She slid off the bed and sat beside you. “That’s not true.”
“It is,” you insisted, tugging your sleeves over your hands. “He’s Remus. He’s kind and brilliant and patient and so, just, him. And I’m…”
You laugh, but it’s humorless.
“I’m a mess. A walking insecurity with a pulse.”
“You’re not,” Lily said firmly.
You kept going like you hadn’t heard her. “He’d never see me like that. He’s never looked at me like that. Not once.”
Lily opened her mouth to disagree, then stopped.
Her eyes softened with something almost sad.
“He has,” she murmured.
You shook your head hard. “No. He hasn’t. And I can’t keep falling for someone who doesn’t choose me. No one ever has, Lily. Not really.” You buried your face in your hands. “I just need to make it stop.”
“Love doesn’t stop because you decide to take the scenic route around one boy,” Lily said quietly.
“Maybe not.” You dragged in a shaky breath. “But maybe it’ll hurt less.”
“Or maybe,” Lily countered, leaning closer, “you’ll break his heart without realizing it.”
That made your stomach twist.
“He’ll be fine. He won’t… notice.”
Lily let out a laugh, short, incredulous.
“Oh, he’ll notice, alright.”
You stared at her.
But Lily only shook her head and sighed, brushing your hair gently from your cheek.
“Listen to me,” she said. “Avoiding him is a terrible idea.”
“Maybe,” you whispered. “But it’s better than loving him out loud and getting nothing back.”
Lily touched your hand, squeezing.
“Please don’t do this to yourself.”
You squeezed back once, then pulled your hand away.
“I think it’s the only way.”
Lily’s shoulders slumped in defeat. “Then you’re going to break both your hearts.”
But you were already standing up, pulling your hoodie tighter around yourself, your decision settling like a stone in your chest.
“Better mine than his,” you murmured.
Lily watched you with helpless worry, but she didn’t try to stop you again.
Because she knew, you’d already closed the door on the possibility before Remus ever had the chance to open it
It was torture, watching him from across the Great Hall, ducking your head whenever he caught your eye, pretending you hadn’t heard him when he called your name in the corridor. He’d looked hurt, confused, but you told yourself it was better this way. Maybe, if you starved the feeling, it would fade.
It didn’t.
You didn’t plan for it to become a pattern.
Not at first.
It was supposed to be one skipped breakfast, one missed walk to class, one excuse about studying with Lily. But then the universe did what it always does when you’re trying to avoid someone: it delivered him to you every time you didn’t want to see him.
Monday morning, you slipped into the Great Hall late, hoping he’d already eaten with the boys.
Your heart sank the second you saw him sitting alone, scanning the entrance like he was waiting for someone.
You spun on your heel so fast you nearly ran straight into McGonagall.
Later, on the staircase between classes, you heard him before you saw him, his familiar, soft voice echoing off the stone.
“Hey, have you seen—?”
You didn’t stay to hear the rest.
You ducked behind a group of Hufflepuffs and took a different staircase entirely, pulse thudding in your ears.
It kept happening.
In Charms, he slid into the seat beside yours out of habit, then stopped short when he realized you’d taken the one next to Marlene instead. His face fell before he caught himself, offering you the smallest smile, like he was trying to pretend it didn’t sting.
You stared straight ahead until he sat with Peter.
During free period, you picked the farthest possible table in the courtyard, pulling your hood up even though the sky was clear. The breeze carried faint laughter from across the stone path, James, Sirius, Peter… and Remus.
Every time Remus’s laugh drifted over, your book blurred.
Then his shadow flickered at the edge of your vision.
He stared towards your table like he was deciding whether to walk over.
Your stomach dropped.
You buried your face deeper in your book and didn’t move until his footsteps faded away.
Eventually, he stopped trying to approach you directly.
But that only made it worse.
Because now he watched you. Not in an intrusive way, Remus never could be intrusive, but with the helpless confusion of someone trying to solve a puzzle that suddenly rearranged itself overnight.
In the corridor before Potions, you felt his eyes on you from down the hall. You kept your gaze fixed on the floor tiles, but you could sense his frown, gentle and worried. Like he was asking a question you refused to hear.
At lunch, he sat with the boys, but you caught him glancing toward the end of the Gryffindor table every few minutes, as if checking to see whether you’d finally sit beside him again.
You never did.
Lily elbowed you once.
“He looks like a kicked puppy,” she whispered.
You shrugged, pretending your throat wasn’t tightening.
The worst part came on a quiet evening in the library. You hadn’t realized he was there until you turned down the Transfiguration aisle and nearly collided with him, his warm wool sweater, ink-smudged fingers, tired amber eyes widening as if you’d shocked him.
For one suspended second, neither of you moved. Remus’s lips parted like he was about to say your name. But before he could, you did one of the most logical thing you could think of. You bolted. Books clutched to your chest, breath shaking, you left him standing there in the dim library light like you’d just slapped him. You didn’t see how long he stayed frozen in place.
But the next morning, you saw the evidence:
a tightness around his eyes, a heaviness in his shoulders, the way he didn’t even bother picking the seat beside yours anymore.
But you told yourself it was better this way.
If you avoided him long enough, maybe your heart would quiet down.
Maybe the feelings would settle.
Maybe you’d stop aching whenever he smiled.
You kept telling yourself that. Even as your chest twisted every time he walked into a room. Even as you felt his gaze follow you like a word half-spoken. Even as the distance you created felt like a cliff you couldn’t cross back over. Because Remus Lupin deserved someone confident. Someone beautiful. Someone certain. Someone who wasn’t you.
Late one night, you and Lily sat curled up in the Gryffindor common room, Marlene sprawled across the rug with a stolen blanket. The fire was low, crackling lazily, shadows flickering on the walls. You were laughing about something silly, James trying to impress McGonagall that morning, when Marlene suddenly sat up, eyes sharp with mischief.
“So,” she said. “Are we going to talk about how you’re obviously in love with Remus Lupin, or are we pretending it isn’t the most obvious thing in the bloody castle?”
You froze.
Lily’s lips twitched into a smirk. “Told you she’d say it.”
Your heart stopped. “I—I’m not—”
“Oh, come off it,” Marlene said, throwing a pillow at you. “You get all glassy-eyed when he so much as breathes in your direction.”
You felt your face burning. “I don’t— I can’t—”
The laughter caught in your throat, broke into something else entirely. The words burst out before you could stop them.
“Fine!” you burst out, louder than you meant to.
Lily froze, eyes wide, but you couldn’t stop now—not when everything inside you was finally spilling over.
“Yes,” you whispered, voice shaking. “Yes, I like him. God, I love him.” Your breath hitched, a trembling exhale leaving you as you pressed your fingers to your temples.
“But it doesn’t matter,” you continued, softer now but somehow heavier, each word cracking open in your throat. “It doesn’t matter because I’m not… I’m not enough.”
Lily’s face twisted, like the words physically hurt her.
You didn’t look at her. You stared at the floor, your vision blurring as tears gathered.
“Remus deserves someone brilliant,” you said, voice barely above a whisper. “Someone beautiful. Someone that… shines when they walk into a room.” You swallowed hard. “Not me. Never me.” You sniffed, quickly wiping at your cheek even though another tear fell right after it.
“I ruin things, Lily.” The confession left your mouth in a small, broken rush.
“I overthink everything, and I get scared, and I shut down and he deserves someone who makes him better, not someone who… drags him down with all my insecurity and nonsense.”
“That’s not true,” Lily breathed, reaching for your hand, but you gently pulled away, too afraid you’d fall apart completely if someone touched you.
You shook your head, staring at a spot on the carpet like you needed something solid to focus on.
“He deserves someone he could actually want,” you whispered, voice cracking again. “Not someone he feels obligated to be nice to. Not someone who panics if a pretty girl even looks at him.” A small, humorless laugh escaped you, sharp and sad. “Just someone… better.”
Lily looked heartbroken.
You wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to hold in the ache swelling in your chest.
“And I’d rather…” you began, but your voice wavered too much to finish. You took a shaky breath. “I’d rather have him as my friend than ruin everything by wanting something more.” That’s when the tears finally spilled over, quiet and warm on your cheeks.
“I’d rather lose the possibility than lose him,” you whispered.
The silence that followed was deafening. Your chest heaved, shame pressing down so heavy it hurt. Lily’s hand reached for yours, her expression soft and aching, while Marlene looked like she wanted to march out right then and hex Remus into loving you.
But before either of them could speak, a voice came from behind you.
Low. Shaky. Familiar.
“That’s not true.”
You spun, stomach plummeting. Remus stood at the bottom of the boys’ staircase, pale in the firelight, his eyes wide and stunned like he’d just stepped into a dream. Or a nightmare.
“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” he said quickly, his gaze locked on yours, “but you’re wrong. About all of it.”
You tried to swallow, but your throat was tight. “Remus, I—”
“You’re not unlovable,” he said, louder now, firmer. His fists clenched at his sides like he was holding himself together. “You’re the opposite. You make everything brighter just by being in the room. I don’t deserve you, not the other way around.”
The world tilted. “What—?”
He took a step closer, the firelight catching in his tired eyes, warm and trembling with something that looked a lot like hope.
“I’ve been in love with you for a long time,” he whispered. “And if you’d rather have me as only a friend, I’ll take it. Gladly. But I need you to know that you’re already everything I want.”
The room was utterly still, even the fire seemed to quiet. Lily squeezed your hand once before standing, dragging Marlene with her toward the girls’ dormitory, both of them smirking like they’d planned this all along.
And then it was just you and Remus. You, with your heart breaking open. And him, waiting, afraid, but looking at you like you were the only thing worth looking at in the whole world. You couldn’t breathe. His words hung in the air, like impossible and so unreal.
“Don’t,” you whispered, shaking your head. “Don’t say that, Remus. Please.”
He blinked, startled. “Why not?”
“Because it’s not true.” The words tumbled out, your throat tight with tears. “You think you mean it, but you don’t. You don’t know what you’re saying. I’m—I’m nothing compared to you. You’re smart, you’re kind, you’re brave. And I’m just…” Your hands curled into fists in your lap. “I’m broken. I’m a mess half the time. I’m not beautiful like Lily or confident like Marlene. I’m just me, and that’s not enough. Not for you.”
His face softened, but his voice was steady, firm. “Don’t you dare say that about yourself.”
You looked up, startled by the steel in his tone.
Remus moved closer, kneeling in front of you so you had no choice but to see the way his eyes shone, raw and unguarded. “Do you think I don’t know what it’s like to feel unworthy? To feel like you don’t deserve love? Merlin, I live with that every single day.” His jaw clenched, his breath shaky. “But you—you’ve never made me feel like a monster. You’ve never looked at me like I was less. You’re the only person who makes me feel like I’m enough. And now you’re trying to tell me you’re not?”
“Remus…”
“No,” he interrupted softly, shaking his head. His hands hovered over yours before he finally took them, tentative but warm. “I need you to hear this. You are the most extraordinary person I’ve ever known. You laugh at my terrible jokes, you listen when no one else does, you care so deeply it hurts sometimes. You’re kind, and brave, and you make me feel like I matter. You’re not unlovable—you’re the reason I even know what love feels like.”
Your chest ached, torn between wanting to believe him and the heavy, ugly voice inside you that hissed otherwise. “But what if I ruin it?” you whispered, your voice breaking. “What if you realize I’m too much, or not enough, or—”
“I won’t,” he said, fierce now. His grip on your hands tightened, grounding you. “I’ve already seen you at your best and your worst. Nothing you could do would make me stop caring. Nothing.”
Tears spilled down your cheeks, and you hated how easily you broke in front of him. “I don’t know how to believe you.”
“That’s okay,” Remus murmured, reaching up to brush the tears from your cheek with the gentlest touch. “Then let me believe enough for both of us. Let me prove it to you, every day, until you see yourself the way I see you.”
You stared at him, at the boy who carried so much pain and still offered you this kind of tenderness. And for the first time in weeks, the voice inside you faltered.
“Remus…” You swallowed hard, whispering his name like a secret. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t,” he promised, his forehead resting lightly against yours. His breath was shaky, but his words were steady, absolute. “You couldn’t lose me even if you tried.”
For a moment, there was nothing else, just his warmth, his presence and the comforting sound of the fire crackling in the background. And for the first time in a long time, you let yourself hope. Your breath caught when his forehead brushed against yours. You could feel every tremor in him, every unspoken word in the silence between you.
“I’m scared,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “Scared you’ll wake up one day and regret this. Regret me.”
Remus shook his head slowly, his thumb tracing gentle circles over the back of your hand. “I’ve had plenty of regrets in my life,” he said quietly, “but loving you won’t ever be one of them.”
The words shattered something inside you, the walls you have been building, being brought down with the words of a boy, something hard and jagged you’d been carrying for years. Tears welled in your eyes again, but this time they weren’t just from pain.
Remus’s gaze dropped briefly to your lips before flicking back to your eyes, uncertain, as if asking permission. “Can I…?”
You hesitated, heart pounding so hard you thought he must hear it. A thousand fears crowded your mind, but beneath them was something stronger, something warm, pulling you toward him. So you nodded. Just barely.
And then his lips touched yours.
It wasn’t a fireworks kind of kiss. It was soft, hesitant, trembling, like he was afraid you might vanish, and you were afraid he might change his mind. But the gentleness of it, the way he kissed you like you were something precious, undid you completely.
You gasped when he pulled back just an inch, his eyes searching yours. “Still scared?” he murmured.
“Yes,” you admitted, breathless. “But… maybe not as much.”
A small smile curved his lips, the kind that made your chest ache. “Then I’ll keep kissing you until you’re not scared at all.”
And when he leaned in again, you let yourself believe him.
For once, you didn’t listen to the voice telling you that you weren’t enough. You just listened to Remus, to the steady thrum of his heart against yours, and the quiet truth in the way he held you, like he had no intention of ever letting go.
Pairing(s): Kol Mikaelson x Salvatore!reader, Platonic!Mikaelsons x Salvatore!reader, Platonic!Salvatores x Sister!reader
Summary: The real reason you return to Mystic Falls is revealed to your brothers.
Warnings: Emotional Neglect? (on the Salvatore brothers side), Betrayal (duh), Blood, ANGST, Violence, Klaus getting dagger happy, Klaus being incredibly cruel and deranged (normal Klaus behavior), Reader is traumatized (because of Klaus), Reader isn’t really a good person, A lot of neck snapping, Katherine Pierce, Inaccurate historical depictions, Switches between past and present, Some timeline errors and changes, Uses of Y/N, Kol not showing up til like 2k words in, Inconsistencies in the tense it’s written in (what a shock.)
Notes: THIS WAS ORIGINALLY TITLED ‘THE ART OF BETRAYAL’ BEFORE I DECIDED ‘THE DARKNESS’ FIT BETTER!
Reader is ten, turning eleven when she meets Katherine. She isn’t turned into a vampire until she’s 19.
Pizzelles are an Italian cookie. (Yes, this is random. Yes, this is kind of important.)
Canonically Kol was daggered in 1821 because of his lovely iteration of Hamlet, he wasn’t undaggered until 1901. In this, we’ll say he was still daggered in 1821 but was undaggered some time before 1870. Again with the dagger stuff, Rebekah is canonically daggered until 1887 after all the Marcel thing, in this she was undaggered some time before 1870.
And finally, a big thank you to @wholoveseggs for all her support and encouragement while I’ve been writing this because without her, I probably wouldn’t have finished this!
Word Count: 16.3k (goodness gracious)
———————
Present Day
Mystic Falls
It had been one hundred and forty-six years since you had seen your brothers. Actually, it had been one hundred and forty-six years since they had seen you. You kept tabs on them over the years, always so close but not close enough for them to find you. As far as your brothers were concerned, you were dead and technically you were.
In truth, you didn’t want to see them but you had to. You had to for him.
So here you were, driving past the Mystic Falls welcome sign. Your jaw clenches at the sight of it, you hadn’t been here since 1864. Every fiber of your being was screaming at you to turn around, that you didn’t want to be back here, that it was going to hurt you. You shoved the feeling away and continued driving until you reached your destination.
The old Salvatore Boarding House, your old home.
You take a deep breath before walking up to the door. It’s wide open and you can hear Stefan and Damon arguing inside. Your best guess is Stefan tried to walk away from Damon by slamming the door on him and all it did was make Damon angrier and he flung it open.
You followed the yelling to the living room, they were so caught up in their argument that they hadn’t noticed you leaning on the door frame.
“I see you two still fight like cats and dogs… I’m sure this is about some silly girl,” you finally speak up, announcing your presence.
They both immediately stop and look at you.
“Who the hell are you?” Damon asks instantaneously and you couldn’t blame him, the last time he saw you, you were just a kid.
You pout, placing a hand over your heart, “that hurts Damon.”
Letting out a dramatic sigh you place your hands on your hips, “I guess that’s fair though… I mean, it has been a really long time, one hundred and forty-six years in fact and I was just a little kid then.”
“I was about this tall…” you gesture with your hand then gasp, bringing your hand to your mouth, “And the last time we spoke was in this house, in this room!”
Stefan’s eyes widened a bit, his face becoming one of shock and realization, “Y/N?” he whispers.
You smirk and Damon scoffs, “That's not possible, our sister is dead.”
“Well, you’re not wrong about that, though, I believe the proper term is undead—“
You’re cut off by Damon rushing at you, slamming you into the wall, and holding you up by your throat.
“Damon.” Stefan warns.
“This isn’t Y/N, Stefan! It can’t be! This is some sick imposter! I don’t know how they found out… but Y/N… she’s been dead for over a hundred years!”
You knee him in the stomach, causing him to double over and drop you, “Undead.”
Damon grunts, stumbling back but he quickly recovers, “Okay, let’s say you are our sister… Why now, huh?! Why find us now, after a hundred some years?!” he shouts.
You scoff, standing up straight, “Because I saw you both die! I saw father shoot you both dead! You remember that night right? The night you both tried to save Katherine? The night you were turned?”
You paused for a moment, directing your next words to Damon, “The night you told me I wasn’t your sister anymore.”
You knew being back here would be hard, you knew it would hurt. What you didn’t expect was for Damon to seemingly forget everything that happened in 1864. He looked away from you causing you to scoff.
“That woman ruined our family the moment she stepped foot in Mystic Falls.”
1864
Mystic Falls
You stood next to Stefan, rocking back and forth on your heels as you watched the carriage approach.
Your father had told you that a woman was coming to stay with you all, a woman named Katherine Pierce. You were excited for her arrival, you loved Stefan, Damon, and occasionally your father but you were ecstatic to have another girl around.
The carriage opened and two women got out, you followed Stefan down the stairs, standing right next to him.
“You must be Miss Pierce,” your brother says with his hands still behind his back.
Miss Pierce smirks, “Please,” she reaches her hand out for him to take, which he does, “Call me Katherine.”
They stare at each other for a moment, seemingly having a silent conversation before you interrupt, “Hello!”
Katherine seems taken aback by the sudden voice but puts on a smile, “And who might you be?”
“Y/N!”
Stefan chuckles and places his hand onto your shoulder, “This is my little sister, father jokes that she’s my shadow,” your brother teases, “She’d be following Damon around as well but he’s off at war.”
You frown at the mention of your other brother, not noticing the way Katherine’s gaze hardens.
Katherine would grow close with Stefan over the next weeks and unfortunately for you, she made it abundantly clear that she didn’t like you. You couldn’t figure out why but Stefan continually reassured you that Katherine had no problems with you so you tried to let it go.
Then after some time, Damon returned home and you were overjoyed. You had always been close with your brothers, they were practically your only friends. You had been lonely since Katherine had arrived due to Stefan’s infatuation, you hoped now that Damon was back you wouldn’t be so lonely.
“Damon!” you cheered upon seeing him, “Day! You’re back!”
He chuckles, “That I am!”
You rush to hug him which he quickly reciprocates, patting your head. But his gaze focused elsewhere.
“Who is she?” he points.
You turn to see who he’s looking at and sigh, “That is Miss Katherine Pierce, she’s been staying with us for some time now.”
You beckon Damon to lean down so you could whisper in his ear, “I think Stefan may be in love with her.”
Your eldest brother raises a brow and stands up straight, “Hm? Well… I suppose I should introduce myself to our guest…”
Just like that, Damon was infatuated as well. It was as if Katherine was a siren and both your brothers had been tricked by her song.
You watched Katherine as she led on both your brothers, knowing that at least one of them would be getting a broken heart. Though, you had a feeling they’d both end up heartbroken.
The one event that really broke you was when both your brothers were nowhere to be seen on your birthday, and when you did find them it was like they had no idea what the day was.
You hated Katherine, but you weren’t scared of her. Until you saw her true face.
You knew what she was, a vampire. Your father had told you stories about vampires, they’re evil monsters. He told you if you ever even heard whispers of a vampire that you had to tell him and he’d take care of it.
So you told him and he came up with a plan that you would enact within the week.
“What is that delicious smell?” Damon asks as he walks into the kitchen.
You let out a little laugh, “I baked cookies! Would you like one?”
“I’d love one,” Damon takes one of the cookies from the tray, patting your head as he did.
The first step of the plan was complete, now all you had to do was sit back and wait.
It wouldn’t take long for Katherine to come back to the boarding house with Stefan, he goes and sits on the couch while Katherine begins to go upstairs. She turns to give Damon a look and he immediately rushes to follow her up the stairs.
Moments later there’s a scream, followed by shouting from your father, Damon, and some men you don’t know. Stefan is off the couch quickly and at the steps immediately.
Multiple men are dragging Katherine down the stairs while Damon yells at your father. Stefan stands in shock as you reach his side. Katherine is taken out of the house by the men and put into a guarded carriage. Your father holds Damon to the wall as the carriage leaves your home, finally, his eyes land on you and he lets go of Damon, rushing to you, he places a kiss on your head.
“You were right, my dear. You did good.”
With that, he rushes out the door to the carriage, leaving you alone with your brothers.
Stefan’s voice is quiet, “You know what she is…”
“And you told father!” Damon shouts.
“She’s a monster Damon!” you yell.
He scoffs, “You don’t know what you’re talking about! You’re ten! A child!”
Your frown, “My birthday was a month ago Damon… I’m eleven… or have you forgotten?”
“It doesn’t matter! How you could be so cruel… I don't understand… I don’t recognize you… you’re no sister of mine. Not anymore.”
“Damon!” Stefan yells.
Damon shakes his head, shoving past you to the door, “Let’s go Stefan! If we’re quick we can save her!”
And just like that, they rush out of the house without sparring you a second glance. They didn’t know it at the time, but moments later you would run out of the house after them.
Present Day
Mystic Falls
“I never went back home… it wouldn’t be home if you were both dead... So I ran and ran and didn’t look back… I travelled all over… never staying in one place for too long.”
Stefan steps forward and pulls you into a tight hug and you allow him too. It had been a century since you had hugged anyone, you almost forgot how to. He pulls away to get a better look at your face, how you’ve grown since he last saw you.
“How old are you? Physically?”
“It’s rude to ask a woman’s age, Stef…” you giggle before giving an actual answer, “Nineteen, I was turned in 1872… which I guess makes me your big sister.”
He chuckles, “I don’t think that’s how it works.”
Damon crosses his arms, “How’d you turn?”
“Willingly, if that’s what you’re asking… my boyfriend at the time turned me, we wanted to spend forever together.”
“Ironic, sounds a lot like my story with Katherine.”
You furrow your brows, “What are you trying to say?”
“I’m saying, you’re a hypocrite.”
You scoff and Damon takes that as his signal to continue, “Where is this boyfriend of yours now?”
You squeeze your eyes shut, “He’s gone.”
“Gone?”
“Dead.” you lie.
“I’m sorry Y/N,” Stefan smiles softly, placing a hand on your shoulder.
Suddenly, the floorboards creak causing all of you to look at the sound. There she stood, Elena Gilbert.
“Oh… I’m sorry I didn’t realize you had company…” She clears her throat, “Uh… Stefan, you called me?”
Thinking quickly, you speed away from Stefan and slam the girl into the wall. You weren’t dumb, you knew who she was and you knew she wasn’t Katherine but your brothers didn’t know that you knew. Everything would be fine as long as you didn’t kill her, he wouldn’t mind if she was roughed up a bit.
“You keep the bitch around?! After everything?!”
Stefan and Damon sped to your side, Damon ripping you away from her.
You scoff, “You still protect her!”
“This isn’t Katherine,” Stefan says before pulling Elena to him, the girl holding her throat.
“Looks exactly like her!”
Damon rolls his eyes, pulling you farther away, “We know. We have eyes. It’s weird, some weird, freaky nature thing but she’s not Katherine. Smell her, she’s human.”
You turn your attention to Stefan and Elena who are both looking at you, waiting for your next move. Stefan is ready to jump in front of Elena to save her, you almost roll your eyes but resist, this would be like 1864 all over again.
You walk over to them, slowly, tilting your head at Elena.
“I’m Elena…Elena Gilbert.”
You give her a half smile, “Y/N. Sorry.”
You hold out your hand for her to take, which she does after looking at Stefan to make sure you were safe.
“This happens a lot, you’d be surprised…”
“No, I wouldn’t be. Katherine’s a bitch. A lot of people want her dead,” you pause, “Consider getting a tattoo on your forehead,” you brush your pointer finger and thumb across your forehead, “‘Not Katherine’.”
Elena giggles, “In size forty font.”
You crack a smile, she seemed sweet, you almost felt bad about what was going to happen, almost.
“You’re a friend of Stefan and Damon’s?”
“I’m their sister,” you smirk, chuckling at the shocked expression on her face.
“Our sister who we thought was dead up until about five minutes ago,” Damon adds, still suspicious of you.
“I didn’t know you were alive either until I heard rumors from some vampires that fled from here…” another lie.
Stefan and Damon share a look and you look between them, “What?” You ask.
“The tomb vampires.”
Stefan pats your back, “C’mon, we got a lot of catching up to do.”
“Well, this is lovely but are we going to discuss what we’re here for?” A new voice cuts in, she looks familiar but you can’t quite place her.
Elena on the other hand looks terrified, “You…”
“Like he said, a lot of catching up to do,” the woman smiles.
You all sat down in the living room while the woman who you learned to be Rose began to pace back and forth while speaking, “Okay, you have to understand, I only know what I’ve picked up over the years- and I don’t know what’s true and what’s not. That’s the problem with all this vampire crap but Klaus I know is real.”
You keep your expression neutral, you had been told the story of Katerina Petrova, Katherine Pierce as you knew her and how she escaped her death by Klaus and Elijah both. That’s why this woman was familiar, she had played a role in the escape.
“Who is he?” Elena asks.
Damon speaks up, “He’s one of the originals. He’s a legend,” he widens his eyes for dramatic flair.
”From the first generation of vampires,” Stefan gestures with his glass.
“Like Elijah?”
Rose sighs, dropping her shoulders, “No, Elijah is the Easter Bunny compared to Klaus. He’s a foot soldier, Klaus is the real deal.”
You look down to hide the smile on your face, Elijah? The Easter Bunny? Now that was a funny joke.
“Klaus is known to be the oldest…” Stefan adds and that almost makes you giggle.
“So…” Elena begins, “You're saying the oldest vampire in the history of time is coming after me?”
Well, not the oldest.
“Yes.”
“No.”
Damon sighs, standing up, “No, what they’re saying is, I mean, if what she’s saying is true—“
“Which it is,” Rose cuts in.
“—And you’re not just saying this so we don’t kill you…”
“Which I’m not.”
Damon sighs, “Then… we’re looking at a solid maybe?”
“Look,” Stefan says, going to sit next to Elena, “Elijah’s dead so no one else even knows you exist.”
This makes you look up, unless these idiots found a white oak stake, Elijah was not dead, he was simply resting and he’d be pissed when he got back. You only hoped that he’d stay clear of you, you still held a soft spot for the man and you didn’t want to rat him out, but you would if you had to.
“Not that you know of,” Rose adds.
“That’s not helping…” Damon mutters.
“I’ve never even met anyone who has laid eyes on him, we’re talking centuries of truth mixed with fiction!” Stefan argues, “For all we know he could just be some sort of stupid bedtime story…” he looks at Elena, trying to reassure her that she’s safe.
Rose scoffs, “He’s real and he doesn’t give up. If he wants something, he gets it.” Well ain’t that the truth.
“If you’re not afraid of Klaus then you’re an idiot.” Rose adds. Also true.
“Well, what about you little sister?” Damon asks, gesturing to you, “You ever heard of Klaus?”
“No.” Yes. “I doubt he’s even real.” He’s very real.
“You mentioned you traveled a lot,” Stefan looks at you, “You’ve never heard of the original vampires?”
“Never.”
1870
New Orleans
You had showered off all of the blood, trying to rid yourself of the horrible memory. Why was it that vampires seemed to be everywhere you went? And now you were staying in a house with not one, but four vampires.
Sighing, you get out of the shower and change into the outfit Elijah had provided for you, it was a simple night gown, reaching past your knees. You find your way to the guest room that Elijah had shown you and curl into the bed, unable to sleep. You stay in that position all night, not getting even a wink of rest.
When morning comes, you make your way downstairs to the living room, “Elijah?” you call out softly, knowing that he’d be able to hear even the faintest of whispers.
There’s a whoosh behind you causing you to spin around on your heel, expecting to see Elijah but you don’t. A man stands by the couch, smirking.
”I see my brother has taken to copying me. Bringing home his very own charity case,” the man announces as he drops down on the couch to sit, urging you to sit down as well, you do in fear of upsetting him.
You fidget with your hands out of nervousness and he cracks a smile.
“No need to be scared, love. I’m Klaus…” he holds a hand out for you to take and you do, rather reluctantly.
When you don’t say anything, he continues, “Did my brother say something about me?”
You shake your head, “No, not you.”
“Oh? Not me? Did he say anything about my other siblings, do tell me. I’m just dying to know.”
You look around the room before turning back to him, “He said I should be careful around Kol…”
“Ah, my little brother, yes, he can be quite reckless… and rather… insatiable…”
“Are you talking badly about me to our new guest?” a voice that you assume belongs to Kol fills the room.
Klaus clicks his tongue, holding back a laugh, “No, no, little brother. Simply warning the girl of your tendencies…”
Kol scoffs, before leaning over the back of the couch, his chin practically touching your shoulder as he whispers to you, “Don’t listen to him, darling… or Elijah for that matter.”
You jump a bit and tilt your head away from him, inadvertently giving the vampire easy access to your neck. He chuckles and surprisingly, leans away.
“Don’t tempt me.”
“Kol! Elijah already said you’re to leave her alone!” a blonde girl comes bouncing into the room, pulling Kol further away from you.
In a flash she’s in front of you, holding her hand out for you to take, “I’m Rebekah! It’ll be nice to have another girl around!”
She then looks you up and down, taking in your current outfit, “Now this just won’t do, come now,” she reaches her other hand out for you and when you take it she pulls you off of the couch.
She quickly begins to pull you towards the stairs just as Elijah comes back into the room, he sighs upon seeing you and his sister.
“Do not overwhelm the poor girl, Rebekah.”
“Relax Elijah, I’m only going to get her a change of clothes… and we must do something with this hair!” she twirls a piece of your hair.
And with that, Rebekah practically drags you up to her room.
“Sit.” she guides you to a vanity chair, “You’ve got gorgeous features but this hair… this dress… they are not doing you any favors…”
Your face flushes, “Oh, I haven’t had much money for clothing let alone food… It's been hard to find work and I never really learned how to do my own hair… my brother used to do it for me and he’d allow me to braid his… I just can’t seem to do so when it’s my own head.”
Rebekah smiles softly, “You needn’t worry, I have plenty of options for you!” she rushes to her closet, opening it to reveal a plethora of different dresses.
She holds up a gown with a bit of lace detailing that goes up to the neck, “This will do nicely. Much better than this night gown…” she says as she brushes the sleeve of the dress you currently wore.
She hands you the gown, “Go now,” she points to the bathrooom, “get dressed and I’ll do your hair!”
You do as she says and come back, having her help you tie the back.
“Now, let’s fix this hair.” she pushes you back down into the chair, “Would you like a braid?”
You nod, “That would be lovely…”
Rebekah hums, “You said your brother used to do your hair… Where is he now?”
Your eyes widen a bit before you look down, “Oh, uhm, he’s dead… That’s why I ran from home…”
“You’re a runaway?”
You crack a smile, trying to be as confident as possible, “Was my ratty appearance and lack of cash not enough to give that away?”
Rebekah chuckles, “I suppose… were you always poor?” she asks, nonchalantly.
“Oh Heavens no. My family was very wealthy… the wealthiest family in our town. My father was a landowner.”
“You didn’t think to take any money before running?” She raises a brow.
“I was only eleven at the time and had just witnessed… something awful…” you take a deep breath, you hadn’t ever spoken about this out loud, “I needed to get away.”
Rebekah frowns, dropping your hair, “Elijah said you’re seventeen, you’ve been on your own for six years?”
You nod and Rebekah’s frown deepens, “That’s a long time to be alone… that must have been awful.”
“I’ve managed,” you shrug, “I went back once, a week after I had left when I got second thoughts… I found out that my father had also passed. I came across a newspaper, they believed that someone had killed my father and taken me…”
“He was killed?”
You hum, and Rebekah picks up your hair again.
“Did they ever catch his killer?”
“No… but I have a suspicion it was a vampire.”
“Why would you think that?” she asks as she finishes your braid.
“His head was nearly ripped off.”
A few days later, Klaus found you. Elijah was dealing with other matters so he wasn’t there to monitor his brother's behavior.
You were alone when he found you, in the kitchen. Baking was something that you enjoyed doing at your old home and after running away you hadn’t been able to. Elijah welcomed you to use the kitchen and bake whatever you’d like, saying he wanted to make sure you felt comfortable during your stay.
“Not too broken up about your father being murdered?”
The sudden voice causes you to jump, spilling the cup of sugar you were holding.
“You startled me,” you sigh, beginning to clean up the sugar.
“You’re easy to frighten,” in a second, Klaus is directly next to you, making you yelp, he smirks, “Now answer the question.”
“What?”
“Your father…” he practically circles you, “You think a vampire killed him? You didn’t seem too sad about it.”
“I… it was six years ago… wait, you were listening when I was talking to Rebekah?”
Klaus hums, “Six years is not that long,” he ignores your question, besides, you already knew the answer. “Well, to a vampire at least. I suppose I could buy that if your heart wasn’t racing.”
You let out a breath, “Klaus—“
“Yes yes, I know Elijah has told you to stay clear of me even if you deny it…”
“That’s not—“
“You didn’t like your father!” he exclaims, making your eyes widen, “I’ve figured it out, huh? What was so awful about the man? Do tell.”
You scowl, you knew you shouldn’t mouth off to the vampires but Klaus was testing your patience, “Not that it’s any of your business but, he… he killed my brothers.”
“Brothers? Plural? Interesting, you only mentioned one to Rebekah. You’re lying to us now?”
“I- No! I only mentioned the one that did my hair! I didn’t lie!”
“Withholding the truth then,” he smirks.
You sigh, “Elijah knows everything already, I’ve told him everything. I haven’t lied, both my brothers fell for a vampire- my father got involved…” tears begin to prick the corners of your eyes, “…he ended up killing them both… I assume the vampire- that she got away, that she killed my father… that’s why I’ve been alone.” tears begin to stain your cheeks.
You sniffle, rubbing at your eyes when the door opens. Klaus has a sheepish expression when Elijah enters the room.
“Niklaus,” he practically hisses, “What did you do?”
“Nothing! I simply asked the girl a few questions!”
Elijah narrows his eyes, “I’m sure.”
You went upstairs and stayed there for the rest of the day, trying to avoid everyone. You were deep in thought when Kol’s voice startled you.
“My brother made you cry? He does tend to have that effect on women.”
Kol chuckles, and you turn to see him leaning against the doorframe of the room Elijah has you staying in. Your eyes widen and you turn your back to him, probably not your best move considering he’s a vampire but Elijah had told you to stay away. It was bad enough that you had spoken to him earlier but at least then his siblings were around, now you truly were alone.
“Like I said darling, you needn't be scared.”
“Elijah told me not to speak with you, he wouldn’t have told me that for no reason.”
Kol scoffs, “He’s always so dramatic.”
You don’t respond and Kol sighs, “I’ll go if you want, I simply wanted to make sure Nik didn’t upset you too badly… you’re too pretty to be upset over him.”
You blush, he sounds genuine but you couldn’t trust it. You also didn’t want to upset Elijah, he was the one who was giving you a home after all. He could easily kick you out and back onto the street to fend for yourself.
“I’d just like to be left alone… please.”
You hummed mindlessly in the kitchen, swaying while you baked. It had been three months since the Mikaelsons had allowed you into their home, Elijah promised he would find you your own home soon enough but he had been so busy with other duties.
You didn’t mind, you had grown used to living in their home. Ironically, living in the house of deadly original vampires had been the safest you had ever felt. The Mikaelsons had completely changed your opinion of vampires in just a few, short months. Rebekah had become a close friend of yours, Klaus had stopped his frequent questioning and began to see you as a friend (he never apologized but you knew he felt bad when he gifted you a necklace), and Kol… well… Kol was complicated.
After he had checked on you that day, you became curious about him. Elijah’s warnings only did so much to curb your curiosity. At first you had listened, avoided Kol at all costs but there was just something about him that kept pulling you in.
You would often find your mind wandering back to him. His face, his hair, his eyes, his cheshire-like grin…
Kol was determined to get you to break your walls down, he would find you all the time, whether you were painting like Nik had taught you, braiding your hair like Rebekah, or even just laying in your bed. He would find you and you’d just chat.
You brought up Kol to Elijah once, you wanted to know what was so horrible about him because when he was with you, he was sweet. Elijah wouldn’t give you a clear answer, just reminded you that he was dangerous. You wouldn’t mention how much time you had begun to spend with Kol to Elijah, in fear of making him upset.
But he found out, just like you knew he would.
“Miss Y/N, may I speak with you?” Elijah asks as he enters the kitchen.
You turn to look at him, just having finished the dough for the cookies you were making, “Of course, Elijah.”
“I notice you have become quite close with Kol as of late.”
You gulp, looking down, feeling guilty, Elijah had asked one thing of you and you weren’t even able to do that.
“I’m sorry, I know I—“
Elijah holds up his hand to silence you, “Please.”
You let out a shaky breath and Elijah lowers his hand, “I’ve never seen my little brother care for someone like he cares for you… especially after such a short amount of time. You… you’re good for him. He’s changed… so no more of this sneaking around like children,” he waves his hand to gesture around.
Your face flushes, “Oh we’re not… we’re just… we’re not together…”
Elijah smirks, giving you a knowing look, “I never said anything about a relationship.”
1871
New Orleans
“What are you reading?” Kol asks as he drops onto the couch, sitting next to you.
“Frankenstein,” you hum, not bothering to look up from the book, turning a page.
Kol nods, “I’ve heard of that one…”
You two sit in silence for a moment before Kol sighs dramatically. You close your eyes, composing yourself when Kol sighs again. You mark your page and close the book, finally turning to look at him.
“What Kol?”
He shrugs, “I’m bored.”
“Bored?”
“Very.”
You sigh, “Can I at least finish my chapter before we go off to cause whatever chaos you have planned?”
Kol rolls his eyes, “Fine,” he draws out the word.
Just as you’re about to pick up the book again, Kol drops his head into your lap, laying across the couch.
You tense up immediately, “Kol. What are you doing?”
“Waiting for you to finish your chapter, darling,” he mumbles, “Your thighs are very comfortable.”
You sigh, forcing yourself to relax, it wasn’t that you didn’t enjoy his touch or him being this close, it was that it made you nervous. You were falling for Kol, you knew you were and every touch, no matter how small, made you nervous. Touching was common with Kol, you had a feeling it was how he showed affection.
It didn’t take long for you to finish your chapter, “Kol,” you say quietly but get no response.
Your brows furrow and you look closer at him in your lap, he was breathing evenly, his eyes closed. He was asleep. He looked peaceful, and if you didn’t know any better you’d say he looked innocent and angelic.
You weighed your options, you could wake him up and put distance between the two of you… or you could let him sleep, curled in your lap, while you read another chapter.
You decided on the second option and it definitely had nothing to do with the fact you wanted to keep him so close.
It was calm, everything about the moment was so domestic. You wished you could stay here forever, reading a novel while an original vampire laid asleep on you as you brushed your fingers through his hair.
Unfortunately, no nice thing could last.
The door to the compound flung open, angry footsteps filling the silence.
“Niklaus, wait a moment. Let us think about this.”
“There is nothing to think about!”
Kol tenses in your lap at the loud voices, stirring in his sleep. He sits up, forcing the sleep from his eyes.
Klaus enters the living room, glaring daggers at you. You don’t seem to pick up on his angry gaze, “Did you get it?” you ask excitedly.
You had mentioned a few weeks ago that your mother had a cookbook that contained all of your family's recipes. After she died, the book remained in the study of the boarding house. You were sad, you wanted the book back because you couldn’t remember any of the recipes and Elijah had offered to go get it for you.
You told him not to be ridiculous and that he’d have to travel the whole way to Mystic Falls to get it, he seemed to tense a bit at the name but insisted nonetheless. So you told him about the boarding house and where he would find it, Klaus insisted on accompanying him.
“Yes.” Klaus answers coldly, dropping the book onto the coffee table.
You squeal and lean forward grabbing the book, “Thankyou!” you begin to flip through it, “You have no idea how much this means to me…” you look up, trailing off when you finally notice the look on Klaus’ face.
“We found something else too,” his tone is detached as he tosses a picture onto the coffee table.
You recognized the photo instantly, it had been taken shortly after Katherine arrived in Mystic Falls. It was of you, Stefan, and Katherine. The three of you had smiles on your faces, though, it was obvious Katherine’s was fake.
“Her,” he points to Katherine.
“What?”
“Don't play dumb with me,” Klaus practically growls, “This is the vampire you mentioned?”
You gulp, nodding, “I- yes, that’s Katherine…”
“Katherine?” Elijah muses, “Is that the name she’s using now?”
You didn’t miss the subtle way that Kol slid forward on the couch, or the way he placed his hand on your thigh, attempting to hide you behind his arm, to shield you from Klaus’ fury.
“Where is she?” Klaus keeps his gaze locked onto you.
“I don’t know… I haven’t seen her since I ran from home…”
Kol squeezes your thigh to try and calm you down, to reassure you that he wouldn’t let Klaus hurt you even if he tried. You were grateful for him and Elijah, Klaus was impulsive at times, especially if he thought he was being betrayed.
After a considerable amount of time, Klaus had calmed down. He and Elijah explained the story of Katerina to you, how she had escaped her death, and how Klaus wanted her to be scared before he killed her. How he wanted her to suffer.
Just like last time, Klaus didn’t apologize, the day after you found three books on your nightstand, Pride and Prejudice, Little Women, and Les Miserables.
A few weeks had passed since the Mikaelsons found out about your history with Katherine. And you all went on with life like nothing had happened, Klaus would occasionally ask about Katherine and you would always answer his questions. Katherine was why your brothers were dead. Katherine was the reason you hated vampires. And the Mikaelsons were the reason you didn’t anymore.
“My mother used to make these when I was little… this is actually her recipe- well, my great grandmother's recipe,” you tell Kol as he watches you close the pizzelle iron.
He hums, reaching for one that’s cooling, “In all my life, I’ve never had one of these…”
Your eyes light up, “Oh! I’ve been meaning to ask you this! I know you eat my baked goods… but does human food actually taste good to you?”
Kol tilts his head, “I’ve told you numerous times, darling, you’re an excellent baker…”
“But that’s not what I asked, I wish to know if you enjoy them…”
“Your treats are delectable… as are you,” Kol flirts, leaning closer.
Your face heats up at his comment, “Flattery will get you nowhere, Kol Mikaelson.”
“No?” he raises a brow, his face just inches from yours.
“Well, maybe somewhere…” you whisper, your gaze flickers to his lips.
He smirks, “And where would that be?”
“You tell me…”
The tension between the two of you was thick, it had been for a few months now but nothing had come of it. The two of you danced around each other and your obvious feelings, Rebekah would tease you about it, often remarking on how you could do better than her brother.
Just as his lips were about to brush against yours he pulled back, “Darling…”
“Yes, Kol?”
“The iron.”
Your eyes widen and you quickly turn back to the pizzelle iron, standing up from your chair, opening it quickly, coughing a bit as the smoke hits you directly in the face. You use the tongs to toss the burnt cookies onto the cooling rack as Kol doubles over in laughter.
You glare at him, before letting out a small laugh, “You distracted me! This is your fault!”
He smirks, standing up to his full height, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you close, “I’m a distraction?”
“Yes… you are.”
He presses a kiss to your temple and hums, “Too bad you’re stuck with me…”
You pull away a bit to look up at him, “You think?”
Kol stares at you, debating internally about what to say, “I think… no, I know,” he takes a deep breath, “…that I have completely fallen in love with you, Y/N Salvatore…”
A smile appears on your face, “Well I know that I am utterly in love with you as well, Kol Mikaelson…”
He smiles before capturing your lips in a soft but passionate kiss. The arm around your waist tightens, he pulls you impossibly close and you loop your arms around his neck.
A low whistle followed by clapping causes the two of you to break apart, Kol didn’t let you get too far though, still keeping his hand on your waist.
“Took you long enough,” Klaus smirks.
You cover your face with your face with your hands, completely embarrassed but Kol just seems annoyed by the interruption.
“Is there something you need Nik?” Kol asks, rolling his eyes.
“I was just wondering what that burning smell was, wouldn’t want our lovely home to burn down. But I see now our little baker was just… preoccupied…”
“Rebekah!” Klaus shouts, causing your eyes to widen.
“Nik no!” you retort, peaking through your fingers, but you knew it was too late.
“What the bloody hell do you want now?” Rebekah asks as she walks into the room.
Klaus smirks and then gestures towards you and Kol by tilting his head. Rebekah immediately notices the hand around your waist and gasps.
“Finally! I thought you two would be dancing around each other forever!” she squeals.
“What is all this shouting about?” Elijah asks, entering the room while adjusting his cufflinks.
Kol pinches the bridge of his nose before leaning over to whisper to you, fully aware his siblings could still hear him, “It’s like they all come out of the woodwork at the most inopportune times…”
Elijah spots the cooling racks of pizzelles and makes his way over, immediately picking up one of the burnt cookies. He holds it up and raises a brow at you, waiting for an answer.
Klaus begins to cackle, speeding over to Elijah to take the charred cookie from him, “Brother, Y/N got distracted…” he points at Kol, “the distraction.”
Elijah lets out a little chuckle, clearly amused, “Yes, well, try not to get distracted in the kitchen… we eat in here.”
1872
New Orleans
“Are you sure this is what you want?” Kol holds your face in his hands.
“More than anything… I want to be with you.”
Kol chuckles, “My darling, you’re already with me, you already have me.”
He takes your hands and places them over his heart, “This dead heart belongs to you.”
You giggle a bit at his words and he smiles before frowning, “I just… I don’t want you to think you have to do this for me…”
You smile softly, “I know, but this is what I want, I promise…”
“Then it’s a good thing I’ve already had my witches make you a ring… a gorgeous ring for a gorgeous girl, my gorgeous girl…”
You giggle again and pull him in for a kiss which he quickly reciprocates. After a moment he forces himself to pull away. He scoots til his back is against the headboard then pulls you so you’re sitting with your back against his chest.
Kol brings his wrist to his mouth, fangs protruding and bites into his own flesh before holding his wrist near your mouth for you to take. Both your hands grab onto him, pulling his wrist as close to your mouth as physically possible and begin to drink from him.
He groans at the sensation and brushes some of the hair from your face, “Atta girl… that’s it… just a little more… good…”
When Kol decides you’ve had enough he pulls away, chuckling at the way you try to follow his now healing wrist, “My, my, already so bloodthirsty…”
You look up at him and pout, some of his blood dripping from your lips. He could get used to sight of you and blood, his two favorite things, together. He gives you another kiss, tasting his own blood from your mouth.
Pulling back, he sighs, “This is the part I don’t like.”
You lean up and kiss his cheek, “You’re the only one I’d trust to do this… it’s okay, my love, it’s what I want.”
Reluctantly, Kol brings his hand up to your neck, “I love you, my darling.”
“I love you… now please, kill me.”
He winces at the sound of your neck breaking, squeezing his eyes shut. He lays in your bed, holding your body, brushing the hair from your face while softly humming until you wake up.
Present Day
Mystic Falls
You stare at your daylight ring, spinning it on your finger.
“Y/N… Y/N… Y/N!” Damon snaps his fingers in front of your face to gain your attention.
You jump and look at him and then at Stefan, now noticing that Elena left.
“Are you alright?” Stefan asks, tilting his head.
“I’m fine… just… lost in thought.”
Damon’s gaze stays focused on your ring, “Is that your daylight ring?”
You hum, looking up at him and then at Stefan, before holding your hand up to show off the ring, “I know, it’s not nearly as gaudy as yours.”
Stefan chuckles but Damon narrows his eyes, “It’s not a wedding ring,” he notes.
“No…” you state but it sounds more like a question.
“So the guy can ask you to die and be forced to drink blood for the rest of eternity but he can’t get down on one knee and pop the question?”
“Damon…” Stefan sighs, they had just gotten you back and he was worried that all of Damon’s passive aggressive comments were going to drive you away again.
You scoff, “He didn’t ask me to do anything, it was my choice. I wanted this. We… we didn’t need to be married to be in love… it just wasn’t the right time for a wedding anyways…”
Stefan seems a little shocked, “You asked him to turn you?”
Before you can respond to Stefan, Damon interrupts, “This was your first boyfriend?”
“He was my first everything,” you state matter-of-factly.
Both Stefan and Damon groan in disgust at your words and the implication of them.
You roll your eyes, “Oh grow up.”
Stefan stands up, “And on that note, I’m going to school… make sure Elena’s okay…”
You fake pout, “You don’t wanna hang out with your sister after not seeing her for so long?”
“That’s not—“
You cut him off, “Relax Stef, I’m kidding. Go.”
He gives you a curt nod and heads out of the room, leaving you alone with Rose and Damon. You almost forgot Rose was here, she had been quiet ever since she had finished her speech about Klaus. Damon gives Rose a look and she nods, leaving the room.
“I thought you hated vampires,” Damon states, taking the spot on the couch where Stefan once was.
“I did… until I met him.” Them.
Damon stays quiet for a moment, his eyes soften a bit, “This guy must have been special.”
You squeeze your eyes shut, “He was… I really loved him, Damon. I really do still love him…”
Your brother sighs, scooching closer to you on the couch. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and pulls you to him.
“I am happy to have you back, you know… it’s just… you’re not the same kid I left behind, you’ve grown so much, to me you’re still the little girl whose hair I used to braid…”
“It’s okay, Day… I get it… I do,” you smile, using the nickname you used to call him as a child.
He ruffles your hair, “Why don’t we go out, I’ll show you around town… it’s practically the same, just modern.”
“I… uhm…” you sigh, “I’m tired to be honest, I traveled a long way to get here… and I think all the ‘excitement’ just made me even more tired…”
He nods, “Alright, I’m assuming you want your same room, you remember where it is?”
You stand up from the couch, “How could I forget?”
You leave Damon on the couch, making your way to the stairs. You take note of Rose who was standing near the kitchen doorway, she had clearly been listening to your conversation. There was no such thing as privacy with vampires.
Your room was exactly as you had left it, you could tell that no one had even entered the room in years. If you had to guess, you’d say that the last ones to enter were Klaus and Elijah— they had also retrieved your favorite teddy bear on their mission to get the cook book. There was dust floating around and cobwebs everywhere. You let out a sigh just as Damon makes his way up the stairs to you, he must have remembered the state of your room.
“No one’s been in there since…”
“I know,” you cut him off.
“We didn’t want to disturb it…”
You sigh, “Can I just… have another room for now?”
He nods and leads you down the hall to one of the guest rooms that had been maintained over the years, “I can get you extra blankets? Extra pillows?”
You shake your head, walking further into the room and sit on the bed, “This is fine.”
”Alright, well, I’ll let you sleep,” as he’s about to leave, his hand goes to the light switch to turn it off.
In a second, you’re off of the bed. You grab his hand causing him to groan in pain, you were sure you broke fingers but you didn’t care. You couldn’t let him turn off the light.
“Ow!”
You let go after a second, “I… I’m sorry…” you mumble.
“Jesus! If you didn’t want it off you could have said that!” he waves his hand around, wincing as his fingers snap themselves back into place.
You just blink at him, and he sighs, “Just get some rest.”
He reaches for the door this time, you grab it as it’s about to close and he stops, “Yeah?”
“Don’t close the door.”
Damon raises a brow, “You want the light on and the door open?”
You nod, “Please…”
“You can sleep like that?”
“It’s the only way I can sleep.”
Damon goes to open his mouth, but quickly shuts it, deciding that for once in his life he should just be quiet. He nods and leaves it at that, you let out of a sigh when goes, dropping down onto the guest bed.
You want to close your eyes but you can’t. It’s too dark.
Stefan eventually returns and finds Damon sipping on bourbon as usual.
“Our sister is strange,” Damon announces the second Stefan steps foot in the door.
Stefan sighs, “Alright, I’ll bite. What happened?”
Damon sets down his glass, “She’s upstairs, sleeping.”
“Okay?”
“With the door open, the curtains open, and the light on.”
“Damon, just leave it alone.”
The older Salvatore scoffs, “Come on Stefan, that’s weird.”
Stefan shrugs, “I didn’t say it wasn’t. I just said to leave it alone. We just got her back, literally today and if you keep pushing like you always do, you’re going to push her away. Again.”
“Don’t act like this is all on me. We both pushed her away… pushed her right into the arms of some scummy vampire and now she’s stuck like us. Well, at least it sounds like she actually got to make that choice.”
“I thought we were past that,” Stefan lets out a humourless chuckle.
“We’ll never be past that.”
“I was just joking before about you two constantly fighting…” you mumble as you walk down the stairs.
Damon smirks, “Stefan loves to bicker.”
You raise a brow, “So it’s only Stefan then?”
You swiftly make your way across the room to the bourbon and grab a glass, you turn to Damon, “May I?”
“Knock yourself out.”
Humming, you pour yourself a glass, looking at Damon over the rim of the cup, “You and Rose woke me up earlier, safe to say I’m disgusted…” This was a lie, you never fell asleep in the first place.
Damon rolls his eyes, “Now who needs to grow up?”
Stefan sighs and takes that as his que to cut in, “You sleep well? Besides that…”
You take a sip of the alcohol before responding, “Like a baby.”
Another lie, you hadn’t slept ‘like a baby’ since 1914.
1914
New Orleans
“He’ll never let us leave, he’ll never let us be happy.” Kol holds you tightly in his arms, “This is the only way…” he pulls back to hold your face in his hands, “I’ll find the diamond, my witches will do what we need, and then we will leave this place, my love. I want to show you the world, just as you wish but we can’t do that with him looming over us.”
You swallow, “I am tired of watching him hurt you… all of you.”
“And I do not want him to ever hurt you.“
Klaus had been a friend to you over the years but the one thing you disagreed on was how he handled his siblings. It broke your heart to watch any of them be daggered and put away in those wretched boxes for however long he deemed necessary. It drove a rift in between the two of you and you knew Kol was right, with how tightly of a leash Klaus kept on Kol, it was only a matter of time before Klaus saw Kol as a threat and daggered him again.
Besides, it wouldn’t be killing Nik. It would just be giving him a taste of his own medicine for once.
“Okay…”
“Okay?”
You nod and Kol lets out a small chuckle, half smiling at you, he presses his lips to yours.
Pulling back, he looks you up and down, “All you have to do is look pretty, which is an easy task for you considering you always look gorgeous.”
He takes your hand and has you do a twirl, admiring the way your dress moves as you spin, “Absolutely stunning.”
You roll your eyes, giggling as he spins you right into his arms, “Always such a charmer.”
“Only for you…” he presses a kiss to your head, “You head down to the party I’ll be right there.”
You hum, connecting your lips one last time before heading downstairs, blending into the crowd around you. Soon after, Kol would make his way downstairs, he snuck up behind you, placing his hands on your hips and whispering into your ear.
“Rebekah knows but do not fret… she’s going to help us.”
Only she wouldn’t, Rebekah ran straight to Klaus and told him everything.
All of you were currently on the stairs, posed for a family photograph. Kol had his arm wrapped securely around your waist when Klaus raised his glass, taping the side of it with a knife to attract the attention of everyone in the room. He starts by thanking those invited for attending but then makes a special toast to Rebekah.
He looks at you and Kol while speaking, “It is especially gratifying in times when treachery runs deep to know you have someone you can trust…” he turns back to face Rebekah, smiling at her, “A toast, to you, my sister.”
Kol tenses, the two of you share a look and quickly begin to make your way up the stairs. You make it to the top of the stairs before Kol does and just as he’s about to join you, Elijah speeds in front of him. Elijah grabs Kol’s arms, successfully detaining him as Klaus slowly walks up the stairs. You’re frozen in place, unsure what to do and Kol looks at you. He knows this will be the last time he sees you for a very long time so he decides to commit your features to memory. He regrets not asking you for a dance earlier.
“Ladies and gentlemen! I do apologize for the disturbance! But, what’s a Mikaelson party without a little squabble…?” He reveals a silver dagger.
“Y/N run!” Kol shouts and you listen.
You rush away making Klaus sigh, looking at Rebekah over his shoulder, “Catch her,” he commands.
Kol looks at his sister, a pleading look in his eyes as he struggles in Elijah’s hold— watching her run after you, knowing that it would be near impossible for you to outrun her.
You hear Kol’s pained scream as Klaus shoves the dagger into his heart, trying to fight your tears as you run. You were outside when Rebekah caught you, slamming you into the wall.
“Bekah please…”
Her eyes scan your face, your fear, your grief, and she loosens her hold, “I have never had a true friend until you, Y/N… please… forgive me for what I am about to do.”
Rebekah takes your face in her hands, staring into your eyes and you begin to panic, knowing what is about to happen.
“You promised you’d never do that! All of you did! That you’d never take my choice away!” you fight against her.
“Look at me,” her voice becomes hypnotic and you find yourself unable to look away from her eyes, “You’re going to forget Kol, you’re going to forget that you were ever in love with him. You’ve never even heard his name. You are going to forget all about Elijah and… me. All you will know regarding the Mikaelson family is that you have to keep running from Klaus. You don’t stop, you don’t stay in one place for long, you keep running.”
Your eyes have completely glazed over, pupils dilated, “I keep running from Klaus…”
Rebekah pulls back from you, staring at you as your eyes go back to normal, “Y/N?”
“I… I’m sorry, do I know you? I… nevermind that I need to get going, I’m sorry again,” you say, walking past her before using your speed to get farther away.
Rebekah lets out a shaky breath, knowing that Klaus will not believe that you were able to outrun her. She brings her own hands to her neck and snaps it, falling to the ground.
Maybe he’d believe that.
Present Day
Mystic Falls
A few days had passed since your arrival in Mystic Falls, while everything had seemingly calmed down a bit, there was still the looming presence of Klaus.
You had been briefly involved with their plan of getting the moonstone from Katherine, you knew it wouldn’t do them any good and it was clear they were grasping at straws to try and save the doppelgängers life. After contacting him, he told you to just continue on as is so you wouldn’t raise suspicion. You had witnessed Elena’s attempt at a self-sacrifice play, which she failed at terribly due to your brother's intervention… and Elijah’s.
Damon was incredibly annoyed when he found out Elijah was still alive. And after a lot of back and forth and changing of plans, you managed to convince Damon to let you accompany him to the bar to confront Jules. You refused to be on babysitting duty with Jeremy.
You made it your mission to avoid Elijah, knowing that if you saw him you’d end up telling Klaus in fear of him interfering with their plan. You already knew that Elena and her group of friends would try to interfere but you could handle them - you had plans. Caroline was meant to be the vampire… but you had plenty of options for a vampire, maybe even your own brothers. Tyler Lockwood was a werewolf, but you needed a backup, which is the whole reason you went to the bar with Damon. You wanted to get an idea about Jules so that it would be easier to get her.
Jules was smart, she wouldn’t drink the wolfsbane and she instantly knew what you and Damon were. That wouldn’t matter, you knew when it came down to it - you’d be able to capture her with ease. You backed down from the argument, not wanting to fight in the middle of the bar but Damon didn’t. He kept pushing just like he always did.
That brought you to where you were now, back at the boarding house with Damon and Rose. The two were clearly having a moment so you decided to take a step back into the living room. Just as you do, a large wolf jumps through the window, slamming you into the ground. You hold its jaw, pushing its mouth away from you in fear of being bit.
“Damon!” you shriek, “A little help would be nice!”
Damon goes to the fireplace mantel, picking up a sword, taking a swing at the wolf. It lets out a pained sound and releases you- now going to attack Damon. Before it’s able to turn your brother into a chew toy, Rose jumps in front of him, taking the brunt of the attack. The werewolf sinks its teeth into her shoulder, infecting her with its deadly bite.
Your brother slashes the wolf once more and it takes off into the night, knowing it wouldn’t survive another hit from the blade. You let out a sigh of relief, turning to look at Damon and Rose.
“How bad is it?” Damon asks Rose, helping her off the ground to examine the bite.
“It hurts…” Rose whimpers.
You frown, already knowing what is going to happen, you knew of the false hope that she would get.
Damon’s eyes widen, “It’s healing!”
Rose tilts her head to look at her shoulder better, “Oh my God… I thought a werewolf bite was fatal!”
‘It is’ you want to say, to warn her of what is going to happen about how she’ll lose her mind. But you stay silent.
“I thought…” tears fill Rose’s eyes and Damon pulls her into his arms.
“You’re going to be okay…” he reassures her, giving you a look.
You press your lips together, nodding, leaving the room to give them their moment once more. Allowing them to live in a fantasy where Rose would be okay.
You made the decision to disappear for a few days, leaving your brothers and Elena to deal with Rose. Both of them left numerous messages on your phone.
“This is what? Call two hundred and twenty four? You’re really not going to answer them?” Klaus muses.
You sigh, shaking your head, “No. I’m not. They just want help with Rose… I don’t… I don’t want to see her like that, losing her mind… I’ve seen that happen too many times before.”
Klaus hums, “Let me guess, you’re going to ask for my blood to heal her?”
“No,” you shake your head, “She needs to die, she knows too much about you and your family, she’s a threat… besides she’s probably dead now.”
“Our family,” Klaus corrects.
You continue, ignoring him, “I just thought she’d die with a stake in her heart not from going insane.”
“Still sensitive.”
You choose to ignore his comment once again, playing the latest voicemail left by Stefan.
“Y/N, I don’t know where you are or why you left… I’m worried though… about you, about Elena… I miss you… can you please come home? Listen, Rose is dead and Damon is doing what he does best— deflecting. He’s got this new girl… Andie Star I think? I- I don’t know what happened that night, maybe you got bit too? I really hope not… Maybe you got scared… you ran… just please at least call me if you’re not going to come home… I need to know you’re okay. I love you.”
“I presume you’re going back now?”
You nod and Klaus smirks, “Excellent… I’ll be making my appearance soon.”
By time you arrived back in Mystic Falls, Elijah had been ‘dealt with’ as Damon put it. That made you anxious, you doubted they had found a white oak stake but the only alternative was a dagger, and that thought made your stomach churn.
Leaving had fractured the trust you built between your brothers, you knew it would but that was fine with you. The less you knew regarding Elijah, the better. You told them the truth, that you knew Rose was going to die - painfully and out of her mind. Damon was angry that you didn’t tell them and Stefan understood.
There was also the little fact that Katherine had been released of her compulsion. You had to admit, you were a tad anxious she’d find a way to Klaus and find out about your deal. If she ratted you out to Stefan and Damon, every part of your perfectly calculated plan would be ruined. Hopefully, Klaus would be enough to distract your brothers from you so they wouldn’t get too suspicious.
It was no secret that Niklaus Mikaelson liked making an entrance and being as you were currently not getting all the intel since they still didn’t trust you fully— Klaus decided to use one of his favorite tricks which you suggested. Body possession.
On the night of the school dance, Klaus possessed Alaric's body, revealing himself to Bonnie and Elena with dramatic flair and then he killed the Benett witch— at least that’s what you two thought.
The truth of Bonnie’s fate would be revealed on the night of the ritual when she showed up to kill Klaus with the help of Elijah.
Elijah had dug his hand into Klaus’ chest and you had no idea what to do. You couldn’t fight Elijah, that was one fight you’d certainly lose, not to mention Bonnie and all of the others being there, they’d stop you before you could lay a hand on him.
Klaus looked at you, silencing your fears with one glance before looking back to Elijah and confessing the truth, “I didn’t bury them at sea.”
His gaze flickered to you and Elijah looked to where his brother was, he hadn’t seen you in so long but still, he trusted you, so when you nod your head ever so slightly… he believes Klaus.
Two days had passed since the ritual and Klaus was now a hybrid. You had spent those two days following Elijah through the woods, cleaning up Klaus’ mess.
In fact, that’s where you currently are. It had been practically silent between the two of you, neither of you wanting to start the conversation, after all it had been nearly a hundred years. That was until you decided to open your mouth after arriving at another camp that had been ripped apart.
You move a body and scoff, “He’s not even draining them. He’s killing for sport.”
Elijah hums, “You sound shocked, you should know by now this behavior is expected of Niklaus.”
“He’s wasting perfectly good snacks,” you grumble as you throw the body to Elijah who catches it with ease.
“You’re thirsty?”
“No, Elijah, I’m annoyed,” you throw your hands up, walking closer to him, “It’s been two days since the full moon, why is he still a wolf?”
“I don’t have the answer to that.”
“Okay, well, what if he’s stuck as a wolf? Hm? Then what? We’re going to put him on a leash and have him lead us to the coffins?”
Elijah lets out a chuckle, “While that image is amusing, I’m sure he’ll be turning back soon.”
You sigh and go back to cleaning up the bodies in silence, when you’re done you both continue to follow the trail that Klaus was leaving behind, you had no doubt you’d soon run into more bodies.
“What have you been up to for the past century?” Elijah asks, walking so close that your arms brush against each other.
You come to a stop, and it takes Elijah a moment to stop and turn back, looking at you slightly confused.
“Are you serious? I was trapped, Elijah, and when I was trapped I was running from him,” you jab your finger into his chest, “from you.”
Elijah looks down at you, a frown on his face, “I haven’t been doing Niklaus’ bidding since he said he dropped all of them into the ocean… he implied that he had found you as well… that you were gone… I never did want to hurt you, Y/N.”
“Well it didn’t seem that way to me. I didn’t know that. I’ve spent the last century looking over my shoulder, not staying anywhere for more than a moment because I knew that no matter where I went, you, or him, or some minion of his would be waiting. And when I wasn’t running I was trapped… there… all alone…”
“Y/N—“
“I know what we did was unforgivable,” you say, taking a step away from him to continue following the trail and he follows, “but what he had planned for me was just cruel…”
“If it’s any consolation, none of us agreed with Niklaus’ ‘gift’.”
You let out a humorless laugh, “Is that what he called it?”
“Yes, it was intended to be given to you for your engagement… obviously you were shown sooner than intended… it was his disturbed way of welcoming you into the family officially.”
Your brows furrow, “What engagement?”
Elijah stops, seemingly realizing his mistake, “I apologize, I thought you knew… Kol…”
You stop and turn to him, “He was going to propose?” your voice breaks a bit as you will away your tears.
Elijah sighs, stopping to face you, “He had rings, new daylight rings… I do not know much of how he planned to propose, just that he planned to do it after the new year… You two had been together for so long I assume he thought it was time to ask…”
You blink a few times, before clearing your throat, “Let’s just find Klaus.”
He nods, continuing to follow the path, he can practically feel the emotions rolling off of you. Grief, sadness, anger, and even jealousy. Then there was the look on your face, the look of heartbreak. Even after all these years, he still hated to see you like this. He would always feel guilty, after all, he was the first one you met, the one who introduced you to everyone. He would forever feel at least somewhat responsible for your pain.
1869
New Orleans
It had been five years, nearly six since you ran from home, since your brothers were killed, and you were still having a hard time settling down. You found yourself in New Orleans, you loved everything about it, but there was one problem. It was hard to find work as a woman and even harder as a seventeen year old so you adapted to stealing.
You would wait by stands or alleyways and wait for the perfect target, you’d typically go for men who held their heads high as if they owned the world. Men who were so well dressed that you knew they had money to spare. Sometimes you’d even hang out near bars to find men stumbling around, too drunk to notice you taking their entire wallet.
It was late now, you were leaning against a wall when you saw him. A rather attractive man dressed in a fancy suit, you had no doubt that it had been tailor fitted to him. He begins to walk down the street, walking right past you, seemingly not noticing you. There weren’t as many people out now, normally you’d use the strangers during the day as cover but this man clearly had too much money for his good, you couldn’t pass up the opportunity.
As quietly as possible, you push yourself off the wall and follow behind him. You smirk when you see his wallet in his back pocket but just as your fingers graze what you assume is real leather, his hand snatches your wrist.
“What do you think you’re doing?” His voice was low, dangerous.
You curse yourself for being so reckless. You swallow your pride and decide to try and flirt your way out. Men with the kind of money you knew he had, always enjoyed being flirted with, it boosts their already over-inflated egos.
You giggle while leaning a bit closer, “You’re even more handsome up close…”
He chuckles, “Is that so?”
“And this suit… it fits you so well…” you brush your hand along his chest.
“That’s very flattering…” he smiles, bringing his hand up to cup yours.
Hook. Line. Sinker. You had him.
“But I know what you’re doing.”
You did not have him.
Your smile fades away and you pull back from him. This had never happened before, most of the men were too dumb to figure it out (at least until they got home and found their wallets missing), it was just your luck that you’d try and rob the only smart guy around.
“How old are you?” He looks you up and down.
You gulp, “Seventeen, sir.”
He pulls his wallet from his pocket and holds it out to you, “Take it.”
“What?”
“Take it, you want my wallet? Take it.”
With shaky hands, you reach for the wallet, it was embarrassing being caught like this but you needed the money.
“Thank you…” you trail off, realizing you hadn’t learned his name.
“Elijah Mikaelson.”
Your eyes widen at the name, you had heard of the Mikaelsons before. A rich, powerful family and there were whispers all around that they were the thing you hated most. Vampires.
He smirks at your reaction, “And you are?”
“Y/N.”
He nods and smiles but it quickly fades when he glances at his watch, “Well, Miss Y/N do try to stay safe… you never know who or what may be lurking in these streets, especially at this time of night.”
And just like that, he was gone. The next time you saw him was after the new year when he pulled a newly turned vampire off of you. You saw him a third time when this exact thing happened again, you didn’t know why but you it seemed you were practically vampire bait.
After these two incidents, Elijah decided it wasn't safe for you to be on the streets any longer and invited you to come stay with him for some time before he could find something more permanent. An idea you were not so eager about when he confirmed that he and his family were in fact, vampires. But you couldn’t pass up the offer when he was offering you an actual bed to sleep in and numerous necessities. Little did either of you know that the compound would become your permanent home.
Present Day
Mystic Falls
After your conversation you had fallen behind Elijah, walking slower to keep the distance. When he called out that he had found him, you hardly even picked up the pace.
“You’ve been busy…” Elijah remarks, leaning on a tree.
“That was… amazing.” You hear Klaus’ voice before you see him.
And when you do see him you groan, spinning around and closing your eyes, “You could have told me he was naked.”
“Did you think I was carrying around his clothes these past two days for fun?” Elijah raises a brow.
“It’s been two days?” Klaus asks, you can hear him shuffling around while getting dressed.
“Full moon came and went. You remained a wolf.” Elijah states but it’s more of a question.
“I can change at will then, that’s good to know.”
Klaus smiles and then chuckles, “I remember… every single kill.”
“Yes, we’ve been cleaning up your little mess along the way.” Elijah gestures between the two of you.
“Just like old times then.”
Elijah hums, and pushes off the tree, handing Klaus his boots, “Well, you’ve had your fun. I believe we have a bargain.”
“That’s right!” Klaus exclaims, leaning down to put on his boots, “Now what was it again? Oh yeah, wait, I remember, that’s it! You wish to be reunited with our family!”
“And you!” he shouts towards you, “You want your precious Kol back…”
You turn around, finally facing him, pleased to see that he has put his pants on. You want to say something but hold your tongue, there was a time where you weren’t afraid of him but now it felt that if you even stepped a toe out of line he’d hunt you down.
Elijah brushes off Klaus’ jacket, “You gave me your word, Niklaus.”
Klaus smiles, cheekily, “And what kind of brother would I be if I broke my bond… even if you did try and kill me.”
You sigh, and Elijah holds out Klaus’ jacket for him to put on, “I could have… but I didn’t.”
Klaus puts on his jacket and fixes the collar, “And now no one can,” he turns to face Elijah, “Relax, Elijah, all is forgiven.”
He smiles at you, “That applies to you as well, love. You have more than proved yourself loyal.”
“Where are they?” Elijah cuts in.
Klaus grins, patting his brother's arm, “You need to lighten up… I’ll bring you to them soon enough.”
He walks ahead of you and Elijah, the two of you sharing a look before you scoff and follow after the hybrid. He ends up taking you to Alaric's apartment, you feel a pit in your stomach knowing that Katherine is going to be there but you do your best to push it away.
“Look who decided to come for a visit.” Katherine gestures to Stefan as you, Klaus, and Elijah enter the apartment.
“I need your help.” Stefan states, his eyes flickering to you, wondering why the hell you’re with them, there was no way for you to know what had happened to Damon so that couldn’t be it.
Elijah shuts the door, and Stefan steps closer, “For my brother.” he then looks at you, “our brother.”
Klaus clicks his tongue, “Oh well, whatever it is, it’s going to have to wait a tick. You see, I have an obligation to my brother.” he points at Elijah. “And your sister…” he points at you.
“It requires my immediate attention.” Klaus brushes past Stefan.
You hug yourself, feeling anxious of the entire situation, it was bad enough that Katherine was here and now Stefan was too.
“You understand how important family is or you wouldn’t be here.” Elijah walks a bit closer to Stefan, “My brother gave me his word that he would reunite me with my family.”
“And so I shall.” Klaus speaks from behind Elijah, Elijah spins around to face his brother but it is too late, Klaus shoves a dagger through his heart.
You feel frozen when Elijah screams, tears begin to fill your eyes, you know what is about to come and there's no point in running because he’d just catch you. Rebekah wasn’t here this time to buy you time.
His body drops to the ground with a sickening thud, his skin completely grey and you knew you would not get the privilege of a quick death.
Klaus smiles at you and the tears begin to fall from your eyes.
“Please! I- I didn’t know about Elijah’s plan! I didn’t even know he was here! I only heard rumors! I swear! You said it yourself, Klaus- I’m loyal! I’ve proved it!”
Klaus shushes you and walks closer, your body doesn’t move, you’re rooted in your spot. He brings his hand up to hold your cheek and brushes a tear away, you shudder at the touch, letting out a sob.
“Loyal…?” Stefan questions, the floorboards creaking when he steps forward.
Klaus’ gaze immediately snaps to your brother, “Another step and I’ll rip her heart out.”
“She’s my sister-“
“All the more reason for you to stay put, Stefan.”
The two stare at each other for a moment before Stefan steps back. Klaus smirks, turning back to you. You tense up when he rests his hand on your neck, another sob wracks through your body.
“Don’t do this… I did what you asked! I found the doppelgänger! I found Elena! I called you as soon as I found her! Sure- Katherine found the werewolf but I made sure you had the backup one! And you needed the backup one! And- and using Alaric was my idea! I came up with that, it was perfect! You thought it was hilarious! I’ve helped you!”
Stefan’s brow furrows at your admission, his voice barely audible as he connects the dots, “You’re the reason he’s here… that’s… that’s why you came back to Mystic Falls to find us… not because you missed us, but because you’re helping him…”
You don’t bother to look over to your brother, you felt bad for betraying his trust, for lying to him but he could never understand, you don’t say anything, it wouldn’t matter now.
You look up at Klaus with tears staining your cheeks, “I did everything right!” your voice falls to a whisper, “Don’t make me go back there, it’s dark, Nik, I hate the dark…”
“You know, I considered you family once, I treated you as such.”
“Please Nikkie… you gave me your word…I just want him back, you promised me!”
“Oh love…” Klaus brings his hand up to brush some of the hair from your face, “You have me confused with Elijah…”
In a split second his hand falls to your neck, the sound of it snapping fills the room and he drops your body on the ground, discarding you.
Klaus turns back to Stefan who looks devastated by the news, “Don’t look so glum Stefan, you wouldn’t be the first to be tricked by your sister. She’d do anything to survive, even if it meant betraying those closest to her,” he glances at Katherine, noting the similarities.
He shakes his head, looking back at Stefan, “But that’s a story for another day…”
Klaus speeds forward, slamming Stefan into the wall, “Now… what am I going to do with you?”
Present Day
Chicago
“My sister? She knew you? All of you?”
Klaus approaches the coffins, “If you can’t handle it, don’t ask.”
Stefan looks at all of the coffins but two of them catch his attention, they’re away from the rest, almost like they’ve been isolated. One of the coffins is made of some sort of metal and they both have engravings on them that compliment each other.
Klaus notices his gaze and smirks, “I see you’ve spotted the lovers.”
“the lovers?” Stefan raises a brow.
His smirk deepens, he steps away from Rebekah’s coffin and to the others, he opens one of them, revealing a boy in clothing from the the early 1900s.
Stefan looks over the boy, completely confused he turns to Klaus who grins.
“You wouldn’t recognize him… you never had the pleasure of meeting Kol…” he brushes his hand over the engraving on the other one, “You’d recognize whose in this one though…”
Klaus could see the gears turning in Stefan’s head, his eyes widening as he pieced the puzzle together.
“My sister?” his voice breaks a bit.
Klaus laughs, “You always were quick, Ripper.”
“This is what you meant by family? You got her a coffin and a dagger? That’s family to you?”
The hybrid clicks his tongue a few times, wagging his finger, “No Stefan, I got her a coffin… I never said anything about a dagger.”
Stefan’s heart sinks at the new information, it all hit him at once, why you hated the dark, why you had to have the door open, why couldn’t stand to be in silence.
You didn’t get a century long sleep like Klaus’ siblings would, you got to lay there and rot, slowly and painfully, all alone.
“I had a witch make it, it’s spelled… only I can open it.” Klaus boasts, clearly proud of his work.
“That’s cruel, even for you.”
“Maybe so, but I must punish those who betray me accordingly.”
Klaus takes a step closer to Stefan, “You met Rebekah and I in 1920… but we did not meet by chance. I sought you out, I was looking for your sister… The girl can really run when she wants to. I was hoping you’d be able to help me find her, but you were too busy draining civilians, Ripper.”
“I wouldn’t have been helpful either way. I thought she was dead.”
“I’m aware… I thought that she’d maybe be nearby, watching, that was something she often did— check up on you and Damon. Regardless, I found her on my own in 1924.”
1924
London
Today marks four years since Rebekah’s compulsion had worn off which meant one of two things, she was dead (unlikely) or she had been daggered (very likely).
It had been four years since you remembered Kol and ten years that you had been running. You were tired, tired of running, tired of having to look over your shoulder every five seconds, tired of not having your beloved around.
Klaus was hunting you and you had done a damn good job at keeping him off of your trail, always being careful when finding a snack and making sure you were never in one place for too long.
So you decided to do the opposite, you had been in London for two weeks now, ripping through crowds of people with no remorse. You wanted Klaus to find you, you wanted him to kill you.
You’re currently in a bar full of people, well, dead people. You slaughtered everyone and now had your teeth buried in some man’s neck.
“Perhaps you’re more like Stefan than I thought.” Klaus’ voice fills the bar.
Reluctantly, you pull yourself off of the now dead, drained man. You look at Klaus with blood coating your face and staining your dress.
After staring at each other for a moment, you stand to your full height, Klaus gives you a once over before raising a brow.
“You’ve gotten sloppy, left a trail of bodies a mile long leading me right to you.”
You simply stare at him and he smirks, “You wanted to be found.”
“I can’t do this anymore… not without him. I‘m tired, Nik. Please, just end it.”
Niklaus clicks his tongue, “End it?” He takes a step towards you.
“Kill me.”
Klaus laughs, “You think I want to kill you?”
Your brows furrow and you take a step back from the hybrid, Klaus snaps his fingers and two men enter the room carrying a coffin.
You take another step back, eyes widening and Klaus grins, “You can try to run but you won’t get far…”
“No… you… you can’t dagger me…”
“You’re right, daggers are such trivial things to make… you would know after all. But a lockbox that only I can open, now that’s much simpler.”
You decide to risk it, attempting to speed away but he catches you in a second, holding you up in the air by your throat.
“Don’t worry, you’ll be back with him soon enough… consider this me officially welcoming you into the family.”
Present Day
Chicago
“What was the point of letting her out just to lock her back up? To be cruel?”
Klaus shrugs, “I was bored and decided to make her a deal in 1984.”
“1984? You kept her in there for…”
“Sixty years, Stefan. She betrayed me and those were the consequences. When I woke her up we made an agreement.”
“What kind of agreement?”
“She’d find me Katherine and bring her to me. She couldn’t ever find Katherine but she found me something even better…”
“Elena…”
“Yes, the doppelgänger.”
“So she knew the truth about your curse? That you’re a hybrid?”
“She was my family once, lived with us for nearly half a century. She knows a lot more than she led you all to believe. But don’t get any ideas, she’d never tell you anything that could hurt us… she wouldn’t risk Kol or Rebekah getting caught in the crossfire… or Elijah, though I suppose she’d be alright losing me considering she attempted to do so herself.”
“Moving on!” Klaus chirps, moving back to Rebekah, “It’s time for my little sister to wake up…”
“And I knew her?” Stefan asks, looking into the now open coffin, “I don’t recognize her.”
“Well don’t tell her that,” Klaus muses, “Rebekah’s temper is worse than mine.”
He pulls the dagger out, waiting for a moment before sighing, “Any Day now, Rebekah… she’s being dramatic.”
Present Day
Mystic Falls
It had been months since Klaus had locked you away. You were a bit surprised when he came to free you, your bones creaked, skin practically gray… still, you weren’t nearly as desiccated as the last time you had been in that coffin.
He fed you blood and brushed your hair for you as if you were a doll then provided you with a white colored dress that went to your knees, it reminded you of the one Elijah had given you when you first arrived in their home.
When Klaus revealed he was hosting a dinner with Elijah for Stefan and Damon you realized what he was doing. You were a bargaining chip.
You sat in the living room, humming to yourself, waiting for them to arrive. You still felt weak from not having blood for so long and the fact you were shaking was proof of that, the little blood that Klaus had provided was not enough.
Soon enough, your brothers arrived and were let inside by Elijah, “Niklaus, our guests have arrived…”
“Damon… Stefan…” Klaus greets, standing by the head of the dining room table, “Elijah tells me you seek an audience… very bold. Let’s discuss the terms of our agreement like civilized men, shall we?” he gestures to the large table that was set for five.
“It’s better to indulge him,” Elijah states, moving past your brothers.
“I didn’t come here to eat Klaus,” Stefan narrows his eyes, taking a step down the stairs, “I didn’t want to come here at all… but… I was told I had to, because you’d hear us out.”
Klaus hums, “Well we can sit and eat… or I can reach down your throats and pull out your insides…” he takes his seat at the head of the table, “choice is yours…”
Your brothers decide it would be best to sit and eat. Once the four brothers had sat down, Klaus sat forward in his chair, dramatically placing his hands in front of him, “I almost forgot! Sweetheart!” he calls out, “You can come out now!”
That was your que to enter, walking through the doorway and making a beeline for the table, refusing to meet anyone's eyes. Elijah stands when he sees you, pulling out your chair for you and when you sit he pushes you in.
“Y/N…” Damon says quietly, it isn’t until then that you realize he hasn’t seen you since the night of the ritual.
“Damon…” you mumble in a voice so quiet that anyone without supernatural hearing wouldn’t be able to hear you.
“How are you—“ he begins but is quickly cut off by Stefan.
“She’s practically part of their freaky family, Damon, and Klaus won’t kill his family… he’ll just torture them endlessly.”
“That’s not very nice Stefan,” Klaus clicks his tongue.
You grab the glass of wine, downing it as quickly as possible. Hoping that it will not only curb your blood cravings but also make this dinner party a little more bearable. When you finish your glass, you reach for Elijah’s.
He raises a brow, shooting you an unimpressed look, “By all means, help yourself.”
You take a sip of the wine, ignoring Elijah, “Can we please get on with this dinner… I’m starved.”
“Well at least one of you is hungry… Stefan seems to have lost his appetite,” Klaus notes, nodding his head in Stefan’s direction.
Damon glances at his brother, gesturing with his fork, “Eat. I thought we agreed we’d leave the grumpy Stefan at home.”
Reluctantly, Stefan picks up his fork making Klaus smile, “That’s the spirit. Isn’t it nice? Five of us dining together? Such a treat. Is that what you had in mind when you pulled the dagger from my brother?”
Damon smiles sarcastically, “Well, I know how he felt about you, so I figured the more the merrier,” he winks playfully at Elijah.
“Well, Elijah and I have had our share of quarrels over the centuries… but we always make it through,” Klaus takes a bite of his steak.
“Kind of like you and Rebekah, right? Where is she, by the way? Last I checked, she was still daggered because you were afraid to face her,” Stefan quips, smirking over the rim of his bourbon glass.
Damon shoots a warning look at Stefan but you can’t be bothered by their conversation, you’re too focused on your bloody steak in front of you. Savoring the small amount of blood you’d get from its juices.
“If you’re referring to the fact Rebekah knows I killed our mother, I’ve already come clean to Elijah,” Klaus smiles at Elijah who has remained silent, resting his head on top of his fist.
“Hey Stef,” Damon cuts in, grabbing everyone’s attention, “remember when you killed dad? Might want to dial down on the judgement until dessert.”
You had been fighting the urge to lick the dish clean, hoping for just another drop of that delicious, bloody flavor. But Damon’s words distract you, making you look up from the plate.
“You killed dad?” you ask, looking directly at Stefan, he doesn’t verbally answer, only narrowing his eyes at you making you hum, “I always thought it was Katherine…” you fidget with your fork, pushing it across the plate.
“You want another plate, love?” Klaus asks, his tone was sickeningly sweet, he snaps his fingers and a compelled blonde girl comes running to get your plate.
She leans over you, hair falling past her neck and you could feel the veins beneath your eyes begin to ripple. The girl's eyes widened, Klaus may have compelled her to do his bidding but he never compelled away her fear.
“Y/N,” Klaus says your name in a sing-songy tone, a warning.
Your lips part at the sound of her heart pumping, the smell of the blood in her veins, and your fangs begin to descend.
“Y/N. No,” Klaus tries again, setting his fork down.
But it was too late, you were out of your chair in a split second. You wrapped your hand around the girl’s neck, slamming her into the nearby wall hard enough to crack it, your other hand holding one of her wrists. You nearly moan at the taste of fresh blood, like an animal you can’t get enough.
Removing your hand from her neck, you flatten your palm and push the tip of chin up until it’s out of your way— effectively breaking her neck. You continue to drink, not caring as the blood stains your mouth and neck, dripping to your dress.
Klaus sighs, “One nice dinner, that’s all I ask, is that too much to ask for?”
He rises from his chair and speeds to stand behind you, “That’s enough.”
You don’t listen and Klaus decides there is only one solution to the problem he caused, snapping your neck. Your head is practically on backwards and he allows your body to fall to the ground next to the blonde, dead girl.
Damon stands up, his chair screeching but Stefan grabs his arm, dragging him back down, and Klaus clears his throat, walking back to the table as if he hadn’t just broke your neck.
Elijah sighs, excusing himself from the table, he picks up your body with ease and brings you back to the table, setting you in your seat. He twists your head so your head is facing the proper way, hoping that it’ll allow you to heal and wake sooner. The dinner would proceed as normal, other than Damon looking at your body every few seconds, it was as if nothing had happened.
When you woke, you were alone at the table and you could hear voices coming from the living room.
“Elijah… why haven’t you left?” Klaus sounds confused.
You stand up, finding your bearings.
You can hear the smugness in Elijah’s tone when he speaks, “You’ve lectured Y/N on her manners all night… but where are yours, brother? We forgot dessert.”
You take slow steps towards the living room.
“What have you done?” Klaus’ voice is panicked, he sounds betrayed.
“What have you done?” Elijah retorts, “You see, I’ve learned not to trust your vulgar promises, Klaus. We’re doing this on my terms now.”
You’ve nearly made it to the living room door way when you stop in your tracks after hearing Klaus utter a single word.
“Kol…”
“Long time brother.”
His voice, Kol’s voice. Your Kol, he was here, he was awake.
You rush to the doorway, freezing when you finally see him. Kol, he looked the same as he did on that fateful night in 1914, still wearing the same outfit. He still looked as beautiful as you remembered him to be, tears began to prick the corner of your eyes but not tears of sadness or fear, they were tears of joy.
You could see Stefan still by the fireplace where he had been burned, you could see Damon standing off to the side of Elijah, but it didn’t matter, you didn’t care about your brothers in that moment. It was as if everything around you faded away and it was just you and Kol.
“Kol…” you whisper, softly.
His gaze snaps up to find you, his eyes softening when he sees you.
“Y/N…”
Without giving it a second thought, Kol takes one of the hands restraining Klaus and uses it to snap the hybrids neck. He speeds towards you, something Damon takes note of but when he moves to get to you, to try and protect you from what he thinks is a threat; Elijah places his hand onto Damon’s chest, stopping him from moving.
You slowly bring your hands up to hold his face and he covers your hands with his, ”You’re real…” you breath out, you still couldn’t believe he was in front of you after all this time.
He smiles, chuckling a bit, “I’m real… and I’m not leaving you ever again.”
You smile, causing more tears to flow and you throw yourself into his arms, nuzzling your face into his neck, squeezing your eyes shut and welcoming the darkness that came with it because for the first time, in a century, you weren’t alone in the dark. You were with Kol, your Kol.
His arms wrap tightly around your waist, inhaling your scent that he remembers so fondly, “I missed you, my darling.”
It must have been those words that finally helped Damon connect the dots, that this was the boy, the one that changed your opinion on vampires, the one who turned you into a vampire. This was the boy you lost a century ago, the boy you’d do anything and everything to get back. Including betraying your own family.
“You’re free to go. This is family business.”
Elijah’s words made Damon realize something, you weren’t his family anymore, you hadn’t been for a long time. Maybe you never officially got married because you ran out of time but you were no longer Y/N Salvatore, you were Y/N Mikaelson. He can pinpoint the exact moment you stopped being his family and it was long before the Mikaelsons, it was when he and Stefan chose Katherine Pierce over you. That fateful night where he told you that you weren’t his family anymore.
The truth hurts and the truth was that there was no fixing your relationship with either of your brothers. The next few months would make that abundantly clear. Like when you snapped Damon’s neck after he snapped Kol’s. Or when you stood by while Kol beat Damon with an aluminum bat. And of course you stood by Rebekah when she had compelled and trapped everyone in the school. You even helped Kol slaughter all of the newly turned vampires meant for Jeremy… and you let Kol torture Damon.
So maybe you really weren’t their family anymore, maybe that’s why they wouldn’t feel as guilty about what was going to happen when Jeremy would kill Kol.
At least you wouldn’t be alone when the darkness came, you would die in the arms of your love in the middle of the Gilbert family kitchen. It didn’t matter to you that his body was still crackingly, still burning, you‘d endure the feeling of your flesh melting to his if it meant you got to hold him one last time. There would be no coming back for either of you, you knew this and accepted it. You closed your eyes and faded away into the darkness, welcoming it.
You only hoped that when you’d wake on the other side, you’d still be in Kol’s arms.
Sum Reader is hopefully and madly in love with her best friend, constantly having her heart broken living in the shadows of other girls. Unaware that he’s hiding a secret, unable to express the truth about how he feels for her too.
Warn: NSFW18+, angst, yelling, swearing, PIV, fingering, semi handjob, dirty talk, (the smut is a little vanilla for the sake of being romantic), use of Ace as a nickname, y/n occasionally, Dramatic asf fr, maybe too dragged-out argument lmfao. Wc: 9.4k
An: thank you for being so patience! It is suggested you read part one if you haven't, once again I went a bit in circles with this and so now will run away nervous as hell! but hope you all enjoy! Dividers from here & here
He makes good on his promise, avoiding you for the rest of the weekend and into the next week. His absence leaves a heavy weight of guilt that presses hard onto your shoulders, regardless that he had been the one to mostly start the fight. What had you really even done wrong?
Despite his elusion you still see him, amongst your shared classes, the late nights in the common room or when passing in the halls. His head locked straight ahead, as if the wall is the most interesting thing, and if his gaze weakens and he nips a glance at you, it holds no kindness. The icy water drenches your bones again and makes you question your memory, and how badly you’ve hurt him.
Dean keeps his distance as well, despite being unaware of your fight with Mattheo, the damage by him is more than physical and Dean wishes to keep far from the drama tempting to unravel. He decides it’s not worth getting involved now that Mattheo’s made his intentions clear. He wants nothing to do with it. His distance doesn’t go unnoticed by you, and you can’t help wondering how you’ve managed to drag him into an unnecessary mess.
Had you, in spite, subconsciously used Dean to get a reaction from Mattheo? Were you challenging the bounds of your friendship? It wasn’t like you had planned to even consider Dean an option. He had just suddenly been everywhere, like a convenient beacon. It hadn’t been hard to get along, with his contagious energy and charming personality, he had easily cleared the thick aged brain fog once completely consumed by Mattheo.
Clouds slide inwards, covering the heat of the sun, and casting downward shade along the cobblestones, making you plan to head back inside soon. You sit under the shelter of a tree in the viaduct courtyard pondering the inner turmoil. Feeling conflicted, you sigh, weighing up the differences between them.
Dean, a kind and warm spirit who opened his arms to you instantly, making you feel needed and welcome. So ready to listen, and match your energy to his own passions. But there was always something missing. It all felt very surface level, and maybe that was because it was new. Or
maybe he just gave you what you were yearning so desperately for. Attention.
But it wasn’t the right type you craved. For the way you felt under Mattheo’s spotlight was divergent. He made you feel special, your heart beating to a different rhythm for him. Being with Mattheo was like watching a sunrise for the first time, the shades of orange and pink peeking up after you both stayed up all night stargazing. It made you feel alive. He made you feel alive. Made you feel electric with life and like you could conquer anything with him by your side.
Maybe you ought to give Mattheo some credit, for he his life had always left him complicated.
You, of all people, know the traumatic strain his upbringing had scared him, continuing into his current life. There is no escaping the forceful path his life has been shunted down, his hands bound. It wasn't his fault he was deeply flawed, but it was your choice to be the one to see him past those sharp thorns. To help bloom the roses that laid trapped underneath the rumble, bring them to light in the same way as how you saw him.
You sit up suddenly, spotting Dean crossing the courtyard with his friends, and jump at the chance to make amends with him. “Dean!”
His head whips around and he stops walking, allowing you to approach. His smile is less, but not unwelcoming. “Hey Y/n.”
You eye his friends awkwardly till they call out for Dean to catch up and continue walking. You shuffle between your feet, feeling nervous about starting the conversation. “Hi- I.. I just wanted to apologise. I’m really sorry about what happened last weekend.”
Dean is quick to shake his head, respectfully dismissing your apology. “It’s fine, you don’t have to apologize, y/n. I hold no grudges towards you - besides, my nose has healed up all fine.”
You wince at his little joke, adding, “It's not just on behalf of Mattheo, I want to for myself too.”
“Oh?”
“I’m worried. I led you on.. Though I swear it was completely unintentional..”
Dean nods his head firmly and grabs your shoulders to calm your rambling. He already understands and offers you one of his kind smiles you had grown to miss. “It’s really alright. I kind of figured that out already.. And I definitely don’t wanna meddle in the middle of your situation with Riddle.”
“Figured out?”
His eyes crinkle and shoulders shake as he laughs at your oblivious confusion. “I'm not oblivious like you two are, besides I don't really want a repeat of my last relationship.”
You nod, not quite understanding what he means by oblivious, but feeling the recurring wave of guilt hit for misleading Dean and so you just give him an appreciative smile. Your heart remains heavy despite Dean’s forgiveness. “I’m sorry again, anyway.”
He shakes his head, dropping his hands from your shoulders, “It’s fine y/n. Maybe catch ya with Eli sometime. But good luck with everything, yeah. Not entirely sure what you see in the nutter, but knowing what kind of girl you are, it must be something good.”
While Dean retreats, catching back up with his mates, you stay eyes locked on where he last stood in a daze of thought. Must be something good. That’s always what you’ve seen in Mattheo, aware that it’s the defining string between your relationship. The knot that continued to tighten throughout your years at Hogwarts, strengthening with every moment of trust and kindness you shared with him.
For once you bite the trepidation and unknown awaiting, the thought illuminating and making the lightbulb brighter. Hoping maybe Mattheo’s reactions to Dean were rather explainable, and burying the one doubtful tic questioning if this was his usual protective self or merging into something new.
With newfound determination, you set off to find Mattheo, choosing to believe in the bright possibility that this territory was Mattheo awaiting under the rainbow of your deepest fantasies with a mutual feeling.
A week without you had been to put nicely, hell for him. He had wallowed entirely, sulking like a pathetic child, like his favourite candy had been ripped from his clutches. He realized quickly that this was worse, that having your attention shared, not having your presence at all, had turned him into a dreary grump. His mood was not subtle in the slightest, every emotion of agonized resentment shadowed his face in a deep scowl.
He was mad at you for how you defended that prat so easily, without stopping to question his intentions. But then again, he’d never openly admitted that Dean’s words had gutted him, mentioning his biggest insecurity. Not being worthy of you. Of your attention, your kindness, your laughter, your warmth, and last, your love. It had eaten away at him all week.
He’d hardly slept, which was saying something for he rarely could. He knew he was undeserving, and yet if there was anyone he wanted to prove his worth to, it was you.
He continued to watch the lull of the black lake from within the Boathouse, a quiet spot for his thoughts to wrestle in the ring with one another. He missed you in his arms. He missed the gentle way you would soothe him to sleep. With warm caresses that resembled a mother’s touch, but with you it felt more intimate. His cigarette burned, allowing small moments of relief to flow through his lungs, the inhale of nicotine calming his distressed heart.
He hears the footsteps of someone entering the wooden house and peers over his shoulder, assuming it was someone who knew he came here. Seeing its you, he turns back to look at the water, exhaling another deep breath, his heart exhilarating just by your presence. He suddenly feels clammy, wishing to douse himself in the cold water just to calm his nerves.
His shoulders square tensely as you near, and you continue with caution, uncertain how to proceed. Everyone knows the extent of Mattheo’s temper, and thankfully you’ve never found yourself on the other end.
Your earlier bottomless energy and hopeful determination seems to have found a sudden end, diminishing like his smoke does into the afternoon sky. Being around Mattheo again makes the doubt seep back inwards, wondering if Dean had been imagining something between the two of you.
Clearing your throat of nerves, you speak directly to the point. “I didn’t mean it.” Mattheo's stubbornness had always been a persistent habit, one of his shortcomings that meant you knew it was unlikely he'd apologize first. Especially considering he can’t even look at you.
He stays quiet, listening actively. He doesn’t like where this is going, despite aching to make up with you, having never fought with you like this before. He’s aware this is leading to an unstable vulnerability, and he’s not sure he can hold on to the part of him that despises being soft.
“I’m sorry, I.. I- you.. are wanted. Always, Mattheo.”
He flinches at the use of his full name. Coming from your lips, it sounds so sweet and remorseful. He knows you’re being sincere. He can hear it in your voice and somehow it makes it harder for him to admit his own wrongdoings. “But not in the right way.” He mutters mostly to himself, exhaling the last of his cigarette.
Frowning, not catching his mumbled whisper, you take another step bravely and stand beside him, finally capturing a glimpse at his face. It holds no clear emotion of how he’s truly feeling, constrained by the mask he wears protectively. Eyes locked dead on the smoothness of the water, the clouds darkening out above the lake and the surface breaks as raindrops ripple, gently dropping onto it. Even in his blank expression, he still looks gorgeous, making the butterflies flutter.
He sighs, knowing you’re giving him a look to explain, for an answer, anything as he keeps his lips pressed into a thin line. His jaw clenches desperately trying to avoid glancing at you, for he’s well aware that with just one look, he'd crumble.
He stabs the end of his cigarette out on the wooden panels, discarding it into the previous piles of used up ones. “It's fine, Ace. You’re forgiven. We’re still friends, alright.”
Even as he says the words, he curses himself for leaving your relationship there, when he so wants to take the conversation somewhere else. Somewhere further, where he can express himself to you fully, but he’s afraid. He turns towards the exit. “It's late, and it's starting to rain. Let's head back up.”
You stand frozen, reflecting over his words, “wait - what? I’m forgiven?!”
“Yes, that's what I said. Isn’t that why you came here?” He pushes through the door, feeling the beginning of the downpour hitting his skin, quickening his pace, not checking to see if you’re following.
You trail behind him in disbelief, appalled by his audacity. You knew he was stubborn, but not to this extent. “Yes, but-what about yours? Don’t you think I deserve one too?!”
He hears the pain and confusion in your tone and curses himself. He fights the part of him wanting to swallow his pride and spit out an apology, but he’d never been good at those. That would mean he’d have to explain the reasoning and vulnerable depth, years' worth of trauma that built a viscous insecurity he’d never shared with anyone, not even you. He didn’t feel
exactly spritely about indulging you just because you were upset that he hit Dean.
“For what? You’re the one that called me unwanted.”
He knows it's a hard blow as soon as the words leave his lips. But he refuses to change something about himself he knows will only make him weak. Showing that kind of vulnerability and transparency to you is not something he can afford in his life. He can't stand to see your view of him change. To see him fragile, the hidden boy behind the hard exterior. Even if you end up hating him, he’d go to the grave protecting that piece of him, even from himself.
He keeps walking, not noticing that you’ve come to a stand stall, frozen in shock from his jab. His words make your heart ache. It's clear he still holds a grudge over the words you said. You had never meant it like that. It wasn’t that he was unwanted, but his overwhelming protectiveness that ultimately made you feel like he was in control of you, and you had always put up with it.
Never once had you allowed yourself to be selfish and actually enjoy the potential opportunity of romance. Until now, and yet he still continues to act cold, pushing you away.
The rain pours harder, soaking your clothes through to the bone, and you wish for it to absorb you completely. Mattheo finally notices the quieting of your pestering and turns to see you just standing there with an unreadable stare. His brows knit with concern, his earlier irritation washing away, and he blinks through the rain, feeling a wave of guilt.
“Ace.” He descends back down the stairs with a fasten pace, “Fuck- Don’t just stand there, merlin it's pouring.”
Your arms wrap around your body to provide any warmth physically and to your heart, lifting your head heavily as he approaches. “I said I was sorry.” The words whisper with the tone of desolation. Despite your anger, the guilt and worry break the barrier through the emotions you wear on your sleeves, knowing you never wished to hurt him.
He sighs with realization, his habit of self protection had only projected an icy blast at you and messed with your head. He steps without hesitation; coming closer, wrapping you up into his arms, a much needed hug for the both of you. He aches, feeling you reciprocate, gently hugging him back, and he holds you a little tighter, having missed your touch. The way your hands grip with need the longer the two of you stay embraced, and your head snuggles into his chest.
It's one of his favourite positions, his chin aligned with the crown of your head so perfectly. The way he feels ten times lighter now that you’re in his arms, and his eyes close, finally taking a breath of clean air. He gets lost in the moment, grateful for how you’re able to calm him so quickly. How you can take away all his anger at the snap of fingers, all his stress, all his pain even if momentarily just from the mere warmth of your touch.
His peaceful tranquillity breaks by the shakes of your body, and he’s reminded that he is the one to have hurt you. The small sounds of your sniffles smothering into his chest vibrate through to his heart painfully, like an earthquake causing destruction to his protective walls.
Cold water continues to splatter, coating the wet clothes that cling to your bodies, the only warmth radiating from your chests pressed together as one. He rubs your back soothingly, allowing you to express his feelings in the only way he knows how to offer comfort.
He opens his eyes, looking up at the thick darkness of the night; blinking back the rain that has no effort to cease. He can’t fully determine whether your body is still shaking from sadness or the cold. He sighs deeply, looking down at you, offering a smiling feeling as if things will calm back to normal at any moment. “Come on, we should get inside.”
You shake your head stubbornly, not wanting the conversation to end here, and pull back with a deep frown. His smile does little to ease the pain and, in fact, bothers you at how nonchalant he’s acting. “No. it’s just a little rain, and it’s not hurting me nearly enough as your absence of an explanation.”
He studies the wedge of separation you stick between the two of you, the reigniting of infuriated energy charging him like an electric circuit. Why won't you just drop this? He doesn’t answer you, his head turning, looking out over the castle grounds, afraid that if he opens his mouth, he’ll snap at you or, worse, reveal something vulnerable.
You press onwards despite the tensing in his jaw, annoyed that he ignores you. “Don’t you trust me? Why can't you tell me the real reason? I just need to know why you hit Dean?”
“Please, just drop it Ace.” He grits out, trying to keep from raising his voice. His body still turned; his mind buzzing, humming with anxiety.
The lingering anger swarms to the surface at his refusal to even look at you, “I’ve been here for you through thick and thin and you can't even tell me this one simple thing?!”
The clouds boom before a thicker onslaught of water spits down harder on the concrete steps, making it harder for him to hear you. Cowardly, he’s hoping if he ignores the issue, it will go away. But he knows you, and the determination you’re expressing only makes you stubborn like a mule, knowing you won't drop it till you’re satisfied with an answer.
He turns glaring at you. “Let’s just go inside, Ace! It’s fucking thundering!”
Apprehensively, you pause at his loud tone, knowing he’s beyond pissed. But the urgency for the truth pushes you onwards into your questioning, with your heart thinly stretched on the line.
“I can't! I need to know!”
He groans, “Why?! Can’t you just believe me and drop it? Like I already told you that shithead deserved what he g-”
“No! That's not good enough. I need more, a proper explanation Mattheo… and if you can’t tell me why.. I-I'll-”
“You’ll what?!” He snaps with an offensive scornful tone, so bitter he can taste the metal on his tongue for the attitude he’s giving. He blinks the water out of his eyes, shaking his wet hair that hangs soaked to his forehead. “You’ll leave?”
He's ignoring how his mind is screaming to just tell you the truth, to finally bare his heart and soul to you, but the fear of rejection has him by the throat. At this point, though, he’s afraid it won't matter what he does. The outcome is hanging dangerously, that he might lose you either way.
You swallow your turn not to say anything. You hadn’t wanted to actually say it, because it wasn't true. You didn’t want to leave, but you were feeling frustrated, hurt, betrayed.
He continues walking closer with intense energy, the darkness of the atmosphere making him look intimidating than ever. “Gonna walk away? Had too much of me finally, huh!”
His voice raises and you force yourself to hold still and not move from your spot, even when he gets right up in your face. You noticed the clear strain behind his words, and there's a flash of something more in his eyes other than anger, pain.
“Please Matty-y just tell-” you whisper pleadingly.
“Don’t. Don’t do that.. Stop looking at me like that.” He breathes out, hissing with venom and agony.
“Like what?” Uttering the question feels risky, as if the answer will hold all the truth to how he feels. His face twists and turns as your mind spins with anxiety. This is it.
“Just,” He groans with frustration, his voice raising again. “Like that! Fuck. Ace.” The lump in his throat grows, making him uncomfortable and his fists shake, clenching them to control the unravelling pressure.
You blink back the swelling tears and take a braver step closer, “Tell me- god please Mattheo, I swear if this friendship means anything to you! You’ll fucking tell me.” The doubt creeps back in; Dean was wrong. He doesn’t see you the same.
He’s cracking under the pressure and intensity of your gaze, seeing the fire burning like an inferno. There's no longer the usual glowing light he loves. How you stare at him like his answer will make all the difference to how you feel about him. But it's the way you mention your friendship with him that ultimately makes him combust, spilling his deepest, most impenetrable secret.
“Because when you look at me like that, it makes me feel unworthy!” He spits, not pausing to even let you process the emotions coming out of him. “Like I’m breaking you apart from the inside and i-I can't handle that. I can't handle seeing you cry…or even when you look at me in anger. It makes me feel like a piece of shit for who I am.”
His arms are up and his hands stress tangle through the wet locks in distress, “because you’re the best thing in my life! And yet I'm just scum on the bottom of your shoe.. And that motherfucker was right and I hate him for it, because I-i-I don't deserve you!.. Not your kindness… or attention… or friendship, and yet I'm still greedy. I still want more!”
He takes a step back, needing the distance from you. His chest heaves while he lowers his eyes at the pebbled ground, deep in realization that he’s slipped up. The silence between you two is killing him and he’s lost in his head with dread and doubt that he’s just gone and fucked up everything more. He raises his eyes with the little spirit he has left, eyes filled with great pain that knocks the air out of your lungs.
“You want… more.. With me?” The question is barely breathed out into the open space of increasing vulnerability.
He licks his lips, contemplating his next words, taking his time to really study your appearance. He notes the lack of uncomfortableness. There's no show of disgust or rejection of his disclosure for how he feels. He’s surprised he’s still standing considering how his heart is beating, sure if it beats any more he’d need a replacement.
He swallows with force the last of his fear, feeling the lump drag down his throat and sink to the bottom of his pit. He nods, unable to utter anything else, allowing himself to be fully transparent for once.
Tears of realization stream down your face as you comprehend his words, blending with the saturation on your face. He’s not even mad at you. He’s angry with himself. You know him well enough to spot that his eyes reveal his tell. He’s afraid. He wants more, even though he can’t admit it. Your heart skips a beat at the confession.
He’s close enough to catch the onslaught of tears beginning and his face falls with fear. This is what he had apprehended. “Fuck!” He turns with anger, his fists clenching, his body shaking with regret and anguish. “Ace-e - why would you let me tell you this? Jesus!” He’s facing away from you to hold back his tears, his head clouded with assumptions of why you’re upset, all heading in the wrong direction.
“W-what? Mattheo - no these are-” You step forwards reaching for him with a tender arm.
“Dont. Don’t lie to me, Ace.” He shrugs your touch off, blocking his walls back up with ease.
“Mattheo, I'm not lying! I’m not upset-”
“Y/n I’m being serious.. I don’t want your pity-”
You scoff, offended, “Pity!? I've never once taken pity on you, Mattheo Riddle. Is that how you think I see you?” You blink back the tears as he turns again, fighting the frustrations to not just smack some sense into him. God, how oblivious is he to you. “I could never pity you. I respect you too much.”
“Respect me?! What in fuck for?”
The water builds behind your eyes, blurring your vision amongst the rain, watching him express his insecurities. “B-because- because I fucking love you, you idiot!”
There's a buzzing, fluttering feeling in his chest like all his nerves have lit on fire, and he blinks, frozen in shock. His chest rises and falls, shallow and slow, but his heart palpates rampaging behind it. The fuzzy feeling migrates around, running from his fingertips up to the apples of his cheeks like an unwelcoming chill as he attempts to process your words.
Everything he thought he knew disintegrates out into the open space, like a gust of wind swept through his mind collecting all his stupid, suspecting doubts. You love him. Love. Love! The unfamiliar word bounces around his mind as he mulls over the possibilities of the meaning. His mouth runs dry despite the assault of rain, as he struggles to form any words.
“I know this is hard, hell I can’t believe I just said that to you-”
You're shut up by the pleasant surprise of his lips smashing onto yours, with an effort of urgency urged behind the feel of his soft lips. His hands move to cup your face, your soaked face, the warmth of them rising a blush to your cheeks, as he holds them with tenderness. He kisses you with all the love he has, willing to give you every beat of his heart. He knows you already have it. It's always been yours.
Truly, every piece of love for you is magnified by your relationship with him. Your generosity to accept him for who he is, to open your heart to him, even if he always believed it to be platonic. It was enough to grow his heart, and since then, it had always belonged to you. He pushes every ounce of emotion through, knowing it's easier to express than through words.
“You-u..” He breathes, catching his breath as he pulls back, struggling to get the words out.
“Actually?” He smiles in reassurance and hope glosses over his eyes. His chest vibrates as he chokes out a disbelieving laugh and his grin broadens. "You-u lo-” He can't even finish the sentence so choked up by all of this.
A smile graces your face with wide, full cheeks that burn with happiness and you reciprocate his choked upness, feeling the tears start again. The way your head nods ridiculously fast, flicking your drenched hair in all directions, makes him chuckle and he cups your cheeks for fear of it flying off. “Not fucking with me are you now Ace, cuz I swear to god if you-”
Leaning forwards you capture his lips effortlessly, now being the one to shut him up. It's sweet but passionate and he can’t get enough when you pull away. He threads a hand through his soaked hair in utter disbelief, his eyes returning to your loving ones. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long. Kiss the crap out of you over and over.” He rests his forehead against yours and reaches down for your hand.
He’s taking in everything you’ve just said, grasping for the same longing that's been sitting, waiting to be released between the two of you like a dam. His face lights, and a little smile curves onto his face, and for the first time he feels the words sitting with ease on his tongue. “You have no idea how in love I am with you. Ace, I’ve been in love with you since forever. Fuck i-just you know I'm not good with words, feelings, all that bullshit.”
You try to fight the blush creeping up your neck, but the smile that appears beaming brightly back at him is impossible to suppress. You’re completely speechless, overwhelmed with euphoric feelings of contentment. Words you’d only dreamed of hearing, now confessed to you in the eye of a storm, and suddenly you’re laughing. “Are we insane?”
His eyes light at your happiness, but he raises a curious brow, not catching what you said at the sound of another boom. “Are- we…WHAT?”
The sound of your laughter bubbles at his adorable confusion. “It doesn’t matter! We should head inside now.” He seems to catch the end of that and nods hurriedly, reaching out to grab your arm, leading the two of you up and into the castle.
Under the shelter of the overhanging archways he turns, grabbing you by your shoulders, “wait- just let me get something else off my chest first.” He swallows, pushing the wet strands back behind your ears, “I’m s-sorry.”
You watch him feeling an immense depth of pride for him, and you smile softly, reassuring him to continue. “look.. I won't apologise for hitting Dean, I don’t regret that and- i-I can’t tell you it all yet, but he said something that cut deep. Whether or not the asshole meant it, I couldn’t take how it made me feel. But I am sorry I ruined your night at the gig. Fuck- I was angry and jealous and I really was trying to look out for you.”
You nod in understanding, accepting that he’s not ready to bear that much emotion in one night, and bring him in for a hug. “Matty.. You don’t know how much I appreciate you trying.” He clings to you, a desperate boy finally receiving the much needed love he had been deprived of for too long. “And-d you didn’t really ruin my night. I wanted to go with you first, anyway. But I got in my head - the doubt i-i just didn’t want to ruin us.”
He pulls back cupping your cheeks, “god we’re stupid aren’t we?” He smiles amused with the obliviousness and blindness you both held for one another. “I’m just glad I didn’t lose you.”
You shake your head, “you never would have. I was bluffing completely.. I couldn’t handle being without you, Mattheo.”
He grins, leaning down to press another soft passionate kiss to your lips, “and you couldn’t have lost me even if you tried Ace. You’re literally iron cast around my heart. The knot is too tight. You’d have to break me just to free the attachment I have to you.” His eyes are sincere and hold so much emotion you’re verging on tears again.
“Okay, ah let's not cry again. I wasn’t lying about not being able to handle that. Let's go back to my dorm. Come on.” His arm guides you wrapping around your waist, a stark contrast to the way his arm usually drapes over your shoulder casually. He helps you walk back to his dorm with care and compassion, the energy between you a mixture of excitement and lightness, the weight of the confession lifted.
He helps you into his dorm, closing the door and gazes at you with pure happiness before searching his dorm for some towels. A room you’ve stood in many times before but never in this sense, and just being here with all your feelings out in the open makes your body prick with anticipation.
You stand watching him shivering a little, and begin to unstick your thick sweater, clinging to your soaked through shirt, stripping it up with difficulty while Mattheo searches through his draws for some clean clothes. The head of the material sticks trapping your head and you groan, frustrated, trying to pull it off, catching Mattheo’s attention. He peers over his shoulder, laughing at the awkward situation he’s spotted you in.
His gaze drops and his eyes darken shamelessly, admiring how your shirt clings to your body, accentuating your chest. He licks his lips, letting his thoughts run wild for once with no guilt, and stops what he was doing walking closer. His hands graze your waist, letting you know of his proximity as he speaks with a low husk in his tone. “Lemme help Ace.”
He slides his hands gently up your sides till he pushes the sleeves of the sweater up, freeing your arms before helping squeeze your head through the hole. The sweater drops to the floor; the moment becoming charged with heightened tension and desperate looks reflected in both of you.
His fingers descend, tracing down your sides in slow strokes that makes your heart leap your full attention on him. You exhale small shallow breaths, feeling your insides squirm under his intense stare, not daring to say a word. His hands wrap around the curve of your waist, tugging you inwards till you press fully up against him, giving you his signature boyish grin.
“That's better.” His eyes flicker between the desperation dripping in your eyes to the soft parting of your lips, waiting with anticipation.
His head dips, brushing his lips back against yours, and he whispers with the weight of a man ready to feast on his deepest desires. “Ace..you know I want you… don't you?” He’s so close that when he licks his lips, his tongue grazes your lower lip with the subtlest of touches and he relishes in the sucking in of your breath. Barely able to hold back the teasing smirk at your reaction, he presses his lips to your cheek in a gentle, tender kiss instead.
You nod, your chest rising and falling with intense yearning, whispering back, “Yes.. I know now.”
“Good. That’s good.” He presses another kiss travelling up your cheek, sparking the heat to rise, flushing the skin a deep red. He grins sincerely, “you look so pretty when you blush.”
You swallow, feeling your body alight with need, buzzing with electricity that runs down to the tips of your toes. You wonder if he knows how aroused you feel right now. The rest of your clothes are slick still with rainwater, but you already know the puddle forming in your panties is definitely from the heat. You attempt to exhale quiet bated breaths throughout your nose, unable to trust your mouth to open, uncertain what kind of animalistic sound would fall out.
Mattheo might be oblivious to love, but he’s a keen observer in the act of sexual intimacy. It’s as if his eyes are an x-ray lust detector. He knows all the tells of an aroused woman. “So pretty Ace, fuck..you’re making me want to kiss you senseless.” His voice strains with restraint. He’s still holding onto some concern, not wanting to freak you out with all his intense energy waiting to consume you.
The struggle in his tone only makes you want him more and your eyes lift upwards, filled with hungry persuasions. Uttering a simple, “please.”
The moment you plead with those sweet eyes, all his control gets thrown out the window. Taking your jaw in his hand, he leans back in to kiss you. His lips melting onto yours, the two of your lips colliding in synchronization. His hands cup the nape of your head, tilting it back, and diving deeper, his tongue pushes, seeking entrance as kindly as he can be while he fights the pure animalistic hunger to devour you urgently.
You moan softly, allowing him access, the two of your tongues dancing with one another like a fervent tango. He mumbles softly against them, “Do you know how long I craved to feel these lips, Ace?”
A deep flush grows on your cheeks and you breathe heavily, gazing up, feeling his lips kiss along the side of your neck. “How long?” You ask breathlessly.
He chuckles at your response and interest. “too fucking long. I always knew that you’d taste this sweet.” The soft sighs and hums that vibrate out of you have his mind spinning and he presses his lips harder onto your skin, needing to entice more out of you. He pulls you closer to him before he’s back, kissing your lips, engulfing you completely.
The two of you continue to make out, still standing, before his fingers slip under your wet shirt and he hisses at the cold contact. “Merin, you're still freezing.”
“I’m okay.” You reassure him, shivering from his touch.
He smiles, noticing the shiver. “Yeah?”
You nod, promising him, finding it sweet how he’s concerned about you. Sliding your own hands up his arms, you find solace cupping the back of his neck, pulling him down, needing another kiss. He falls back into the growing pattern, not wanting to miss even a single moment of your touch.
“I know a way you can warm me up, though.”
His eyes flutter open and he gazes at you, his eyes glistening with similar intention. “Oh, yeah?” He flashes an amused smile, intrigued by your flirtatious energy. “What might that be, Ace?”
Biting your lip with a teasing smile of your own, you step back, pulling him with you onto the bed, causing him to chuckle happily. His arms flex, holding himself up from crushing you with his weight, and his head dips. “Fuck, you look so sexy when you bite that.”
Your face contorts with a soft whine at the flustering compliment and he grins, more pleased with your reaction. His lips reclaim yours once more with delicate urgency, and you match it quickly getting lost, diving your hands into his curls. Having only stroked his hair tenderly, your fingers move with eagerness, tugging and pulling desperately to get a sound out of him.
His hands trace you with the utmost respect and value, different from his experiences with other girls. There's reasoning and depth behind every touch. Enjoying every sweet moment, being able to explore every curve he’s only dreamed about touching. He’s finally able to hold you the way he's always wanted, no longer needing to hide behind his fragile vulnerability in the dark. He's finally giving you all of him under the limelight, and he hopes to show you how he’s felt this whole time.
Mattheo groans at each tug of hair, lowering himself to keep kissing you, his hands sliding under your shirt again, feeling the way your body contracts. The muscles twitch with sensitivity and he swallows your gasp, grinning before pushing dominantly his tongue back in. His fingers peel the wet shirt up and over your bra.
He sits up ditching his own shirt, and your hands roam over his chest, feeling the groves of his past scars, sending shivers down his back. He watches gazing at your eyes and how they view him. You already know about the meaning behind them, but now you get to love them, and he bites his lip to not get choked up at how you look at him with love in your eyes.
He grabs your wrists, gently kissing both of them before he pins them above your head, shocking a gasp out of you. He grins, satisfied by your reaction as he shifts, sliding his hands upwards, intertwining your fingers together in an intimate hand hold.
“I’ll go gentle on you...just for today, yeah.” Another cheeky grin flashes your way, unaware of the concealed experience of your sexual life.
You laugh at his sweet reassurance, squeezing his hands, loving the feeling of holding onto him. “I’m really not as innocent as you believe, Matty.”
He raises a brow with surprised curiosity. “Are you telling me I’m not about to be your first Ace?”
The silence confuses him, for when he looks down at you, there's a flash of guilt in your eyes. “I’m not?” He feels a wave of jealousy flow through his veins at the thought of you with someone else, though he knows he has no reason to. He leans down, carrying on his sensual onslaught, kissing up behind your ear. He nips it gently as he whispers sultry, “really?”
Feeling your head nod, he lets out a tiny groan, mostly at himself for taking too fucking long to get his shit together. “That is a shame, baby.”
Turning your head to lock with his sight, reassuring him, “It means more with you, though, Matty.”
His eyes soften, giving a curt nod. He can see the sincerity and honesty in your eyes and he offers a smile back, pecking you. He knows it's true, as it is for him. “The same goes for me.” He cups your cheeks, pressing his forehead to yours, “This isn't a one time thing, okay? You mean so much to me, Ace, and never again do I want to make you feel how I did before.”
His eyes hold so much truth and devotion that you can feel your eyes beginning to water. That is before his hips shift, pressing ever so subtly down, getting into a grinding rhythm as he distracts you from the raw moment with kisses.
He almost jumps out of his skin when your bold hand explores down south, not expecting you to act so brazenly. He shifts, rolling onto his side, allowing your hand to slip inside his pants and wrap around his cock. He can’t help but buck his hips into your palm at the feel of your hand making contact.
“Fuck-Ace.” His eyes droop, looking at you shifting onto your side too, your tits squishing together in the constraints of your bra, his mouth gaping letting out a hitched shaky breath.
Capturing your lips once more, moaning into your mouth, he drowns in the pleasure of how your hand increasingly pumps his cock up and down. He murmurs, resting his forehead against yours with knitted brows, “oh - yeah, ace like that.”
His own hands creep and unbutton your jeans, pushing them down with a bit of urgency. “This okay?”
You nod and ask back, “You? This okay?”
He nods, kissing your cheek and down your neck, “Yes.. better than okay- your hand feels so good.”
You tug your jeans down, kicking them off revealing your panties and he groans, peering down, before he slides a hand rubbing your thigh and tracing his fingers teasingly over the skin as they itch with temptation, brushing gently over your core. He rubs, applying slow pressure over your clothed covered clit and runs a hand through your hair, tugging it back to kiss you. He loves hearing your little sounds muffled into his mouth at the extra sensation you’re feeling.
“So pretty..you sounds so hot.”
You whine sensitively and he swears he’s sent to heaven at the harmonic pitch of your voice. His cock twitches, pulsing in your hand to the sound. Your actions slow focusing on your pleasure and for once he doesn’t mind not being the centre of attention.
He watches with an intense focus full of desire at how your pretty eyes can’t handle staying open, fluttering. The steady rise of your chest increases with every bit of pressure he rubs tauntingly slow. He can't wait any longer, maneuvering his hand under your panties, sliding one finger in, his skin saturated instantly in your juices.
His own breathing congeals to short tiny gasps, eyes darkening, consumed with lustral appreciation. “Soakin Ace. You've been this wet the whole time?”
His question, which seems sincere, causes a flustered reaction and you moan again, grabbing hold of the sheets. He takes it as a yes.
Soft moans of satisfaction infiltrate the room at each hum of your lips. He can feel just how much you’re enjoying this, welcoming him to do what he wants. The trust you have to know what he’s doing is appreciated, and he hums himself in arrogance. Every reaction, sound, movement - watching as your hips begin to jut slightly seek more friction only fills him with a deep pride. You're his girl now, and he’ll never disappoint you again.
His lips move peppering kisses down your neck, nipping at the skin, seeking the achievement of leaving marks of purple hues. “You like that, yeah?”
His finger protrudes deeper, gaining a steady pace, and his eyes flicker away from decoration markings on your neck to your legs spreading wider for his hand. He needs more, hearing every gasp and the sweet moan exhaling from you is pure bliss, and makes him feel on cloud nine.
He hisses gently at how your hand involuntarily squeezes the nearest thing, which happens to be his cock still. It's torture, as you're so focused on him, just pleasing him to even notice the subtle teasing you’re providing. “Sweetheart..” His tone is gritted with bated breath. “F-fuck, please either let go or do something with your hand.”
You moan at the pet name and begin pumping him again, trying to multitask, your brows frowning at his addition of another finger. “Ah- sorry Matty.. I’m trying…just feels s’good!”
He grins at your struggle to speak. “Yeah, feels good?” His fingers meticulously move with skill, slick knuckles deep in your cunt, before he curls them, scraping the spot to make your back arch.
There’s a string of whines as your hips buck up into his hand, “Uh! Yes!”
“Yeah, you want another? Want me to stretch you out…wanna be ready for me, don’t you, Ace?”
While his words are forward and prompting for more, he doesn’t make any moves to do anything until you give him confirmation. He’s continuously checking for your assurance, making sure this is what you want. He just wants to bring you pleasure, watch you get off riding slowly onto his fingers. How your back is arching and your muttering soft pleads, all for him. What's yours is his right.
You nod desperately, “Please Matty!”
He obliges, pushing in a third with ease, your walls contracting to fit him snug inside your drenched pussy. The warmth that evades his fingers has him groaning, listening to a new wave of mews slur out of you. “Fuck-that’s it. Such a good girl, baby.”
He bites back the small protest when you release his cock and grip his arm instead, the indents of your nails digging into his skin, stinging but filling him with a possessive power. He wants your marks on him as much as he wants to leave them on you. To combine your bodies as one and intertwine in a way that goes beyond physical.
Pure bliss overcomes your face and you turn, opening your eyes, glossy with need. Bringing his head down in urgency, you plead. “Matty…Matty, I want more.. Please, I don’t wanna cum unless it’s in you.”
“Shit-t yes yeah?”
His fingers slowly drag, retracting out, pulling a needy whine from the back of your throat, and you nod urgently. He gives his fingers a quick lick, not wanting to waste a single drop of you, watching focused how you shuffle out of your panties.
He shifts sitting up and starts removing his own wet pants with great difficulty. The jeans are heavy and compressed to his thighs tight, causing them to stick, his groin constricted pushing snuggly against the material of his unbutton pants. “Shit- fuck, these are fucking tight now.”
Wandering his gaze at your movements, he watches frozen, disbelieving the vision before him. Sitting up onto your elbows, you unclip your bra, freeing your tits and exposing yourself fully. His pants sit halfway down his legs, his jaw tensing, eyes gazing with enamour at your bare body. He blinks again, swearing this has to be one very good sex dream.
“Fucking Salazar.” He takes in your body as you lay waiting patiently. His lustful gaze only makes you that much hotter. He leans against the bedpost, unable to drag his eyes away. “Ace?”
“Yeah?”
“Just checking this is real.” He finishes pulling his pants down, almost tripping over them with excitement that draws a giggle out of you. The sound of your laugh shakes him out of his daze, and he grins cheekily, continuing his mission of ridding his clothes as fast as possible. “God, I love your laugh.. gonna make me cum right now.”
Your laugh grows in ecstatic shock at his vulgar words. “Mattheo!”
“Oh yeah, look at you practicing screaming already.” He grins, finding your flustering adoring. He frees his cock, admiring the absolutely thirsty look painting your face. He can’t help how his mind backtracks to your admission of not being a virgin, and he lets out a speck of jealousy. “Tell me really, am I bigger?”
“Bigger?” Only just are your eyes able to drift away and up with a furrowed brow.
“Yeah.. Then the fucker who stole your virginity.”
You can’t help the pleased laugh breaking out at his not-so-subtle jealousy, trying to hold back the smug attitude. “Seriously, you're getting jealous now, while I'm baring not only my body but my heart and soul to you.” Lifting a feigned unimpressed eyebrow, you watch with astonishment at how his face changes, expressing a small sheepish smile.
You beckon him closer with a finger, welcoming the confidence flowing through you. “Come here.”
As if pulled by a magnet, he crawls back down, hovering above, his eyes gleaming enticingly and the deep inhale of need. The way you’re looking at him as if he holds all your answers, holds all the warmth for you and that he’s the only one to bring you happiness prick at his skin, feeling nervous. But then you smile and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer and whisper an adorable, “Hi.”
He grins back, finding himself relaxing just at the mere sight of those brimming cheeks and whispers back, “Hey gorgeous.”
His hands roam, maneuvering over your body and pushing your thighs apart. He notes how your eyes fall, breath spiking with anticipation. “Hey, look at me.” His voice is a soft, strained whisper, on the break of losing it altogether as the head of his tip drags through your folds. “You know I love your eyes. It's one of your favourite features of mine.”
He’s never done this before. Been so openly intimate, especially as he’s preparing to fuck someone. He nudges the tip a little further in just gently, a low rumble etching out with hoarse feralness. “I want your eyes on me the whole time, ok Ace.”
Meeting his eye, losing yourself drowning in warm pools of brown neediness, listening to his gentle but essential request, you nod in confirmation. “I will. I never want to turn my back on you again. I love your eyes too much, too.”
His cheeks are hurting from how much they’ve stretched into a smile tonight. “God, you’re perfect, aren’t you?” He captures your lips in a short but passionate kiss.
“Just tell me if it's too much, yeah.” He warns concerningly, biting back the desire to lose control and wreck you completely. At just your nod he utters, looking back up, “words Ace.”
“I will.. yeah, Matty just please..”
“Good girl, such sweet manners.” He grins, licking his lip as he grips his cock, nudging it further in between your folds, his eyes fixed on the way your pretty pussy embraces the head so perfectly, like it was made just for him. A glottal groan of relief passes through his lips and he thrusts his hips gently, his cock sliding deeper into the tightness of your warm walls.
“Oh-f-fuck.” He drops his head, pressing his forehead already beginning to bare a sheen of sweat onto yours, feeling the gaping of your own mouth. The sound that pulls from you is sinful, a delicious lewd moan that makes him grip your hips with firmness to not fall apart so quickly.
“God-yeah! You feel so fucking’good.”
At the flexible way your legs bend back towards your chest naturally, he groans breathlessly, taking it as a sign you’re okay for him to pick up the pace. His hips thrust, driving into you with a satisfying rhythm, the moans continuing to tumble from your lips.
“That’s it… you sound so pretty, baby.” He rasps low and husky. He’s looking at everything, watching the pleasure etched on your face while you lay with your eyes scrunched closed, absorbing it all. He flickers his eyes back and forth from how his cock slides between your folds captivatingly and up to your pretty blessed out face. Your mouth gaping as streams of whiney moans flows out, your head thrown back in ecstasy. “Fuck, I don't know where to look baby…look so good taking me.”
Clutching onto him with a grip of iron, nails pinching into his skin as he cages your body in. His biceps bulge under the movement of holding his weight above you. He drops his head into the crook of your neck and he groans, feeling your fingers dig into his hair, listening to your babbled praises. “Matty- ah feel s’good.”
He roams his hands, stretching your legs wider as he presses his palm down to stabilize himself, his hips vigorously bucking with the strength of a raging bull. He doesn’t know how he told himself he could go easy, with the way your pussy squeezes his cock feels as good as pure heroine. He plants kisses on your neck and turns your head towards him, pressing his lips back onto yours.
He’s in love with the way you feel, the way you sound, your touches roaming his body, switching from gentle caresses to carnal scratches. He feels whole with you, intertwined as bursts of passion taint your tongues, each sound harmonising together heavenly. “Ace.. fuck, you’re so perfect.”
You nod, trying to form a solid thought in response, but the way the tip of his cock is gliding so effortlessly into your cervix only makes you chant his name, your voice breaking with a high pitch strain. It’s one of the most beautiful things he’s ever witnessed and he kisses your ear, whispering sweet nothings into them, encouraging your onboarding orgasm. “Mmm yeah, cum for me baby, so fuckin pretty wanna watch you fall apart.”
Your climax breaks spot of of white light blurring your vision and you tighten your arms around him, clinging to the one thing grounding you from the overwhelming pleasure. His head lifts, watching with pure delight at the way your body convulses, glistening with sweat like an ethereal being. His body shakes as his hips jutter following you. Broken groans mumble against the skin of your neck as he spills his seed into you entirely.
He huffs a tired pant, not wanting to move, for he’s never felt so whole as right now. He murmurs softly, pressing a sloppy kiss to your ear, “s'good..the best ace. I could live in your pussy, just fall asleep and never wake up.”
You catch your breath, letting out a shaky laugh that makes your cunt squeeze his cock, releasing another deep groan. He shifts his cock aching sensitivity and pulls out rolling to lie beside you, wrapping an arm around your neck to tuck you into his side.
He rests his chin on top of your head. “You okay?”
Nodding with droopy eyes, you plant a kiss on his collarbone and try to calm your mind and absorb the reality of what’s just happened. “Yeah..you're definitely bigger.” You grin answering his earlier question. You blink, gazing up at him with nothing but love and a rapturous glow on your face. “but I’m ok.. im great.”
He chuckles warmly, not even caring to be cocky anymore. He tangles his hand into the still wet knot of your locks. “fuck yeah you are..and your super sure you're real?”
You pinch his thigh, making a sudden squeal come out of his mouth. “Alright! Aight, no need to seek revenge on me - I already apologised.” He jests cupping your head in a firm hold like one of his usual headlocks, but only plants a soft kiss on the top of your head.
“I am sorry, though, and I mean it.” He shifts so your face is parallel to his and he admires the returning light that shines back into your eyes, a warmth that lights the darkness inside him. He brushes your check with his thumb, over the red hues adorning your cheeks, evidence of your spent state.
“I may be a twat a good portion of the time, and this-”, he gestures between the two of you. “Still scares me, so fucking much.” His words are raw and burn with a vulnerability that still sits unfamiliar in his throat. “You’re truly an enigma. I still don’t know what in the hell you see in me?”
You smile, eyes brimming with the utmost love. "I see everything you don’t.”
It’s the truth, and it always has been. The way Mattheo makes you feel is frightening, electrifying, like you’re caught in a storm and he’s your saving grace, parting the seas, giving you everything you need. How his eyes shine, reflecting your clear emotion, makes your heart beat with the force of a thousand drums stimulating the rest of your body.
A warm buzz vibrates between the two of you, knowing that all along, everything you were both missing was right there. The notion that you'll both be alright, swaddled in the new cocoon of your relationship, both finally receiving the love you deserve together.
This work is my own, please don't copy or claim. Any and all interactions are appreciated, thank you for reading! ty again @amongemeraldclouds for your love and support! couldn't have done this without you!
summary: you and mattheo agree to have your tea leaves read as a joke, not expecting the surprising message they'd reveal.
word count: 3.4k
a/n: merry christmas, my loves! this is the fluffiest, softest thing i have ever written, and that's saying something ♡
The frosty air nipped your cheeks, carrying with it the scents of the holiday that surrounded you: peppermint, pine, and woodfire as you strode through Hogsmeade at eventide. The sky was turning a deep shade of midnight blue and rich violet which made the myriads of strung white lights hanging from the rooftops and doorways appear like stars twinkling around you.
Your boots crunched and crinkled in the packed snow alongside the eager footsteps of your friends who were laughing and joking with one another as you ambled along the annual Christmas market, enjoying the streets lined with vendors selling food, ornaments, and every twinkling bauble and treat you could imagine.
Your eyes dazzled as you took it all in, so idyllic and festive, but despite the enticing sights and sounds you felt your gaze continually drawn to the boy at your side, because it was simply impossible not to stare at him...
...The way his chestnut curls peeked out from underneath his hood, the way his long, dark lashes batted against his cheeks which were rosy from the cold, the way he was smiling, widely, genuinely, in a way that reached his amber eyes.
He was so handsome you felt a tug in your heart, a gravitational pull towards him that trying to defy felt like swimming against a fierce current, but as usual, you stuffed the feeling down, deep within you and tried to appear normal, happy and friendly. Mattheo was one of your closest friends, and even if you did have a raging crush on him, you'd never act on it. You could only imagine what Blaise or Pansy would say if they found out, let alone Theo and the others, you shook your head imperceptibly in an attempt to empty the thought from your mind.
You and Pansy dragged the boys from booth to booth, and despite their mumbles and groaning, you could tell they were enjoying it as they indulged in the endless amount of treats from peppermint sticks to chimney cakes and roasted chestnuts and they passed a flask between themselves to keep warm.
Theo had just taken a long sip from the small metallic container when his face broke into a wide smile and he nodded his head to a booth just ahead of you.
"Oi, look, they dragged the poor old bat out here" he laughed as your gaze followed his to see Professor Trelawney in a booth all her own.
Faded tapestries and multicolored shawls were draped around the booth and tasseled rugs covered the floor, creating a mini replica of the Divination classroom, but the only light coming from within shone from a host of low-burning candles that were dripping wax dramatically onto every available surface.
The sign above the booth announced that she was reading tea leaves, though it was starkly empty unlike the other booths that were crowded with patrons, and she was deeply focused on a crochet that looked an awful lot like an outfit for a cat.
"Gods she's a lunatic" Draco muttered.
"Truly mental" Theo agreed.
"You won't go over there and ask her to read your future" Draco dared, shoving Theo's arm.
Theo got a wicked smile on his face.
"I've got a better idea" he said. "Let's send Riddle instead, she's obsessed with him, always telling him about the dark and miserable ways he's going to die."
"Absolutely not" Mattheo said quickly with a non-humurous laugh.
But the idea was out and running on its own now.
"Ahaha yes mate! Please I need to see this" Blaise chimed in as the guys began to push Mattheo towards the booth, egging him on.
"Fucking not today" Mattheo groaned even as he laughed and swiped the flask from Theo's grasp, chugging it heartily before Theo snagged it back.
Mattheo wiped the back of his hand over his mouth, his lips gleaming with the remnants of firewhiskey, you noted, when he caught your eye and grinned mischievously at you.
"Do it with me?" he asked, nearly pleading. "I can't face her alone."
"Fine, fine" you said, smiling at his pout, pushing him along in front of you as your friends followed closely behind.
Your group crowded into the small booth, nearly shoulder to shoulder. The smell of incense and old books overtook you as Trelawney glanced up, surprised to see anyone, let alone seven of you in front of her until her eyes landed on Mattheo and she jumped in excitement, the crochet falling to the floor, forgotten.
"Oh! Come in my dears, yes, yes, let me–" she said, flustered, knocking things over in her haste to situate herself as Draco snickered and Pansy elbowed him in the ribs.
Mattheo moved to sit on one of two large poufs that lined the low table in front of the professor and he yanked you down beside him. You sent him a look of mock defiance, but truthfully you were glad to feel his warmth next to you and your breath caught in your lungs as he pulled his hood down, his playful smile dancing in the candlelight in a way that brought a deep flush to your cheeks that you hoped he couldn't see.
"Here you go" Professor Trelawney said, bringing you back to the present moment as she placed two fragile tea cups in front of you while a matching teapot hovered over the table, pouring warm liquid into both.
"Thank you, Professor" Mattheo said charmingly and she smiled broadly at him, whether completely enamored by his good looks or dark fortune, you couldn't say.
"Drink, drink!" she said encouragingly, gesturing to the tea.
You glanced sidelong at each other and you caught him rolling his eyes subtly as you both leaned forward and you took a long sip of the tea. It was herbal and a little bitter with a lingering taste of peppermint.
"That's quite good, thank you, Professor" you said kindly, as Mattheo nodded in agreement.
You placed your cups down and she cleared the table before pulling them closer to her. She closed her eyes and inhaled and exhaled vigorously, dramatically several times. You could feel one of the boys behind you shaking with stilted laughter before her eyes flew open, magnified by her glasses, giving her the appearance of a crazed owl as she grasped Mattheo's cup with both hands, staring deeply at the remains of his tea leaves.
"Mmm, yes, yes, just as I feared" she murmured. "Dark and mysterious, Mr. Riddle, very, very dark indeed. You are in grave danger."
Mattheo cleared his throat in an attempt to hide his laughter.
"Oh, wow, of what Professor?" he asked, egging her on.
She turned the cup in her hands, eyes flickering to him and back to the cup again with a nervous smile.
"Well...the leaves...don't say, my dear, just know it's very dark and very grave. There will be misfortunes and hardships–" she carried on and on and you caught Mattheo's eye as he mouthed subtly, silently to you, "So many misfortunes and hardships" and you had to bite your lip to keep from laughing as he smiled.
"What about Ms. YLN here, Professor?" he interrupted finally, pulling Trelawney out of her stupor.
She smiled awkwardly, placing Mattheo's cup down reluctantly, before she cleared her throat and picked yours up, adjusting her glasses and blinking several times.
"Right, let's see" she said.
She peered into your teacup and her face scrunched almost immediately. "Well, I..." she started, before turning the cup this way and that before setting it gently down on the table, glancing back at Mattheo's cup and then up at the two of you.
Her expression was rather serious, and an unusual quiet settled on the group in a way that sent a small shiver through you, raising the hairs on your arm.
"Professor?" Mattheo asked, nearly a whisper, prompting her.
She reached for his cup, pulling it next to yours, and looked at them closely side by side.
"It's the faithful heart" she said finally, looking up from the cups to the two of you and for once her eyes expression wasn't manic, but calm, reassured.
"Sorry?" you asked, like any of you were supposed to know what that meant.
She slid the cups back to you and you both leaned forward. Immediately, you could see what she had seen: the remnants of the leaves in each cup held half a heart, that when placed side by side formed one.
"The meaning may seem obvious" she said, leaning forward, letting her fingers trace the patterns "but it represents two halves of a whole soul, one not fully complete without the other, two spirits destined for one another, destined to understand each other in a way no one else can or ever will, two hearts destined to beat as one."
You realized suddenly that you had been holding your breath because fuck if that wasn't exactly how you felt about him. You realized, too, that your friends were quiet, stone silent, like you could actually hear the snow that had begun to fall outside.
"It's rare" Professor Trelawney said, sitting back in her chair, smiling as she glanced between the two of you, "extraordinary."
Your cheeks were warm and though you'd remembered how to breath, the air felt heavy, a stifling mix of incense and Mattheo's cologne that when combined with the tea in your veins made you feel like your head was swimming. You couldn't bring yourself to look at him, but you could feel his gaze on you, heavy and unwavering.
"Well, th-thank you, Professor" you said, flushing even deeper at the shake in your voice as you stood to leave and could feel the others come back to life besides you. "I hope you have a happy Christmas" you muttered quickly as you stepped out of the booth and back into the chilly air, grateful for the gust of cool wind to clear your mind.
Pansy came to stand beside you as the boys bustled ahead of you, joking and laughing once again.
Theo waited until they were out of earshot of the girls before he slung an arm around Mattheo's neck, pulling him into his side.
"Mate, I don't know you how did it, but you are a fucking artist at work, let me tell you!"
Mattheo stumbled in Theo's firm grasp, the motion jolting him out of the reverie of the snug booth, of the mint on his lips, the warm tea pulsing through him, and the look on your face in the flickering candlelight as you listened to the professor tell you you were meant for him. He felt excited, nauseous and anxious in equal measures.
"W-what?" he asked Theo.
"I know you've fancied YN for just about as long as you've known her" he said, glancing behind them cautiously before continuing, "but paying Trelawney to tell her you're soulmates? I mean that shit is romantic bro, you almost had me there."
"I didn't—" Mattheo started to say, but was interrupted as Blaise threw his arm around Mattheo from the other side, sandwiching him between them.
"I need a fucking drink after that. Broomsticks?"
"Yes!" Theo chanted in reply and they hauled Mattheo along as his mind continued to swirl, and he desperately tried to catch your eye.
The Three Broomsticks was packed with a loud and jolly crowd seeking solace from the biting cold as night settled over the town.
You miraculously found a curved wooden booth big enough for all of you, and as you slid in you found yourself directly across from Mattheo, though you managed expertly to avoid his gaze.
You could tell he was trying to catch your eye, but you couldn't bring yourself to acknowledge him, because if you didn't look at him, you could pretend for just one moment longer that everything Professor Trelawney had said was true, that he could look at you like your souls were tethered together and not like you were one of his best mates.
You made every effort to focus on the conversation around you as your friends talked about holiday plans and new years parties, but it was proving impossible not to dissect everything the professor had said, to re-evaluate everything you knew about Mattheo, to start to see things in a different light.
You thought about how protective he was of you, even moreso than the other boys which was a feat in itself. He sat next to you at every meal, in every class. It wasn't unusual for him to reach for you if the corridor between classes was crowded or if you were in a public place, like he needed to make sure you were safe and by his side. He wouldn't ever let you walk in the castle alone at night, even if that meant falling asleep in the library besides you. But he always quick with excuses and explanations... "There was a fucking basilisk in here five years ago. Nice try, YLN, I will walk you to your dormitory thank you very much."
You thought about your first Christmas at Hogwarts, how you went home and he stayed here and how awfully you'd missed him, about how when you came back, he'd scooped you into his arms, grasping you tightly, not letting go, about how you resolved to spend every Christmas after that together. It didn't seem weird, it was the way you and Mattheo worked, it was just easier to be together than it was to be apart. But was it easier to be together or simply impossible for you to be separated?
Finally, you thought about how over the last 6 years neither one of you had dated anyone, and not for lack of ample opportunity on both sides, how your friends constantly nagged you about it. You blew it off, you were too busy with your studies, clearly. And Mattheo was too busy with quidditch.... Right?
"—YN, YN!" you focused back on the present as Pansy nudged you urgently at your side. "We're getting another round, do you want one?" she asked.
"Sure" you said blearily, dreamily, but as you slid to follow your friends out of the booth and stand in the crowd, you found yourself face to face with Mattheo who had stayed behind to find you, and suddenly there was no escape from his wide, brown eyes or the small smile on his lips as his gaze traced your face, eagerly drinking in the attention he'd been seeking from you for the last hour.
He said something you couldn't hear, and you stepped closer to him, fingers brushing his chest.
"What?" you asked.
"Do you wanna—?" he asked, tilting his head towards a quiet alcove near a large window at the back of the bar.
You nodded and he pulled you towards him, his large, warm hands resting on your hips in a comforting and protective gesture as he navigated you between the bar's rowdy patrons.
When you broke through the crowd and into the quiet corner, you glanced out the window in a last effort to distract yourself as you watched snow falling earnestly in large flurries.
"Hey" Mattheo said quietly, calmly, garnering your attention as you turned to face him and a smile spreading automatically on your lips at his rich voice, at his proximity.
His eyes were bright and twinkling, searching your face intently, perhaps picking up on your hesitancy, which wouldn't surprise you given that he often knew how you were feeling before you did.
"What I had started to say was... that was... something back there with Trelawney, huh?" he let out a breath, just shy of a laugh as he shook his head and carded his hand through his curls in an effort to hide the fact that his hands were shaking, had been since Trelawney had word for word described exactly how you made him feel. His heart would not stop racing; something about what Trelawney had said struck a chord so deep inside him, it was like his body was still humming with the note.
"Yeah... I don't really know what to think of it, I guess..." you replied nervously, not willing to say anything more, not wanting to make a fool of yourself.
He swallowed, eyes shifting to the snow outside, trying to gather the courage he may never have again.
"It's mad, really, to think about something like soulmates, especially from a pile of tea leaves, but... I don't know, at the same time, it kinda made sense to me" he said.
Your eyes blinked up at him and you could feel your pulse hammering in your neck.
"Did it?" you said quietly, breathlessly.
"With you it did, yeah" he said, meeting your eyes fully. "It made a lot more sense than anything else has between us in a long time. I hadn't had a word for it, for the way I feel when you're with me, calm, assured, happy. I always know where I stand with you, what you're thinking, how you're feeling, you're like an open book to me, like my favorite book that I want to read over and over and over again. And at the same time, it makes sense that when we're apart, I lose my mind YN. I don't think you have any idea what it does to me. I can't focus for shit, I'm worried about you, constantly, I feel unsettled, unmoored, it's why I follow you around the castle at night like a dog for Merlin's sake" he said, shaking his head, embarrassed. "That's not normal" he said before gesturing between the two of you "this isn't normal—"
"—I felt it too" you interrupted, "feel it too, I know exactly what you mean, Mattheo, every single word" you said, stepping closer to him.
"Are we crazy?" you whispered, laughing. This should feel weird, should feel incredibly strange and for the briefest moment you wondered if she'd put something in your tea, but then his fingertips brushed your waist again, pulling you closer to him and it felt like the last piece of a puzzle, a missing part of you sliding into place.
Mattheo was shaking his head and smiling, completely enamored with you, unable to look away.
"Nah, not crazy at all" he whispered back.
The air between you was crackling, electrified like the moment before lightning struck when suddenly small snowflakes began to fall around you. For a moment you thought there was a hole in the ceiling, but then you realized you were standing under an enchanted mistletoe that was jingling quietly and showering you both with snow that sparkled and then faded away.
You both looked up, laughing, before you met his gaze again, realizing he was close enough to brush his nose against yours. His warm hand cupped the side of your face and you leaned it as a feeling like melted honey rushed over your entire body and he brushed the pad of his thumb along your cheek.
"I'm gonna kiss you now" he whispered.
"Please—" you started to say before he stole the word out from behind your lips, capturing it with his own, consuming it with his perfect mouth as he pulled you firmly against him.
Every fiber of your being was a live wire, and you were certain that if anyone had touched the two of you, you'd have let off a spark. But being snug against his chest wasn't enough as you moved to wind your arms around his neck and his hands continued to grab onto you for purchase, carding into your hair, grasping at your sweater, the two of you nearly losing your footing in your attempt to close any remaining distance between you as you giggled, bubbling over with joy.
Pansy tucked her wand back into her boot as she looked on from the crowded bar at the two of you.
"The mistletoe was a nice touch" Draco nodded.
"It would have happened eventually" she defended.
"Inevitable" Enzo agreed as he popped by her side, eyeing the two of you as he sipped his butterbeer.
"Fucking finally!" Theo said heartily as he stepped to Draco's other side.
"Aww, would you look at that!" Blaise acknowledged, joining them as they watched the two of you. "Happy Christmas, guys!" he said, raising his glass.
"Happy Christmas!" they all agreed, raising their glasses together, thrilled to see their friends full of the love they both so deserved.
areudirty
tangentwithtanner
stormborns
kaledo-art
2087
gummygunk
blakekathryn
titsay
annaxmalina
