
#extradirty
Cosmic Funnies
wallacepolsom
Peter Solarz

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

JVL
styofa doing anything

shark vs the universe

PR's Tumblrdome

@theartofmadeline
Three Goblin Art
Not today Justin
occasionally subtle

Origami Around

oozey mess
Xuebing Du

if i look back, i am lost
Show & Tell

roma★

★

seen from United States

seen from United States

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seen from Türkiye
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@kittleimp
So I thought y'all would like this too This great white comes to the jersey shore every year and this year they named her and have been tracking her hella so this is Mary Lee and she decided to show herself under this rainbow for pride month A true gay icon
#This is the representation I’ve been looking for
say what you will about the reserve bank of india these are some cracking coins
WANIMAL Model Pi
happy birthday to our real hero
so ocelot’s a gemini….👀
MGS Heritage Post
sources tell me a bitch is having a birthday
I need hollanov to have kids, if only to see them navigate being part of the PTA. You think they talk shit about people in the hockey world? It's nothing compared to the drama they get involved with on the PTA. Shane hates the PTA chair from day fucking one and it's his whole mission to replace her with someone who isn't a fucking bigot on an ego trip.
Ilya tries to be a little more careful. Sure he bitches about her over wine to Shane and some of their friends in the PTA, but the PTA chair's son is in the same class as their daughter, so even if they manage to oust her, they'll probably still have to deal with her for the whole time their daughter is at the school and is it worth the fucking headache that would be?
But then one day he and Shane get called to the school because their daughter was caught fighting with the PTA chair's son. And when they get the full story, it turns out the PTA prince had been bullying their daughter for having two dads. And PTA chair is adamant that her precious Caden would never bully. Sure, because of their religious beliefs, they don't condone Shane and Ilya's lifestyle, but their Caden would never use that as a reason to bully anyone.
And that's when Ilya sees fucking red. He's like "Oh so you just tell Caden that Rini's dads shouldn't be together because god says so and are now surprised that he would say that at school to our daughter? Do you even fucking know how children work? Have you read a single fucking parenting book? Well, in our house, our religion is hockey and in our religion, if someone talks shit you're allowed to punch them as hard as you want."
And okay, Rini still gets suspended, but so does Caden, and when news spreads of what happened, the PTA calls an emergency vote of no confidence. The PTA members all really want Shane to stand for chair, but he insists it should be one of their lovely mom friends who's been campaigning for stronger anti-bullying measures at the school. And from then on, even though neither of them are ever on the main committee, it becomes common knowledge that unless Shane and Ilya like you, you're never becoming PTA chair. They're that serious about protecting their kid.
I’m obsessed with the idea of Shane figuring out he can use his big beautiful doe eyes to get anything he wants.
He just widens his eyes, makes them a bit glassy and Ilya folds like a damn chair.
After a while Ilya figures out what he’s doing and screws his eyes shut to avoid looking at Shane.
Ilya: no Shane no I know what you’re doing, put your eyes away. You will not use your wicked spells on me today
Shane: Ilya will you just look at me please
Ilya always ends up looking at Shane because he can’t resist him and Shane gets his way every single darn time.
Ryan Gosling’s career has just been one long quest to climb the Warner Bros water tower
that man has been trying to climb this tower since he was 16. he has asked multiple times, and every time they said no, but now he’s famous enough & variety was able to convince them to do a shoot on the tower. it all led here. it was all for this.
I’m obsessed with the implication that this was a coming-of-age ritual where a boy becomes a man, like a bar mitzvah
I like to think they’re tucked away in a corner at a farmers market somewhere.
rb and tag your favorite song that's not in english, japanese or korean
Thought that post was cute so i drew it
speaking from a place of privilege (good url)
some of you should not be reblogging this
Hello!
Howdy!
I’d like, uh, two normal rolls.
Sure thing!
And one with the… With the pumpkin seeds.
Which do you mean?
The one with the… With the seeds.
What are they called?
Uhm… A, uh, “crunchy pumpky.”
Sure thing. Would you like anything else?
Uhh… I’ll also take a, uh… A… A Nutella donut…?
Unfortunately, I don’t know at all what you mean…
A… One of those right there!
You really must tell me, what’s it called??
I… I’m… I’m a dumb piece of shit.
Sure thing! Anything else?
That one there?
You know what you need to do. [Here she switches from the formal, customer service voice to addressing him casually and familiarly.]
I… I’m a little greedy pig, oink oink?
Do it!
[grunts like a pig]
That comes to €13.50, please! Have a beautiful day!
Hello! I’d like an “I hate my father” and two “I have a small willi—” [The word that gets cut off is Pimmel, an un-sexy term for penis.]
Role swap au where Zuko was the Avatar who got frozen for a hundred years, so when he’s rescued from the ice instead of a goofy twelve year old Katara catches this mysterious teenager with long hair and a cool scar and a fucking DRAGON
Katara: BOY???? HOT BOY?????? HOT TEENAGE BOY?????????
Zuko: *speaks*
Katara: nevermind I hate him
How does Aang factor into this? I ask because the more I think about it the more I want him to somehow be trying to capture the Avatar.
Aang is 112 years old, decided he was going to be Zuko’s airbending teacher, and refuses to take no for an answer
Aang: Aw, the new Avatar doesn’t want me. Aang: *gets out a weighted net* Time for Plan B then.
JDJSHJABDBFJSH
Look, you know how you keep a net from falling on you? YOU AIRBEND IT, SUCKA. Air comes right after fire in the cycle so it’s not like the guy has any other options. Do you want a flaming net falling on you? No? Then learn to airbend. Or this tiny old man will cart you away like a trussed turkey and lecture you about the power of laughter, going with the flow, opening your chakras, and other hippie shit.
Sokka, slouching against a fence, not moving: Oh nooooooo, that creepy old man stole the Avataaaaaaaaaar. Sokka, sitting down on the ground: We should dooooo something. Sokka, pulling out his lunch: Otherwise he might actually learn something. That would be teeeerrible. Katara, indignant rage coursing through her body: Sokka!!!!!!!! We have to go look for him!!!! Sokka: Might! Actually! Learn! Something! Katara! Katara: *wavers* Katara, also sitting down: We have to go look for him…. *gets out her own sandwich* But, maybe after lunch.
I love that this transforms Aang’s role in the full Team Avatar familial situation from the baby of the family to the Grandpa with weird hobbies
The best part is Aang wouldn’t even teach him airbending in the beginning. First it’d be brewing the perfect cup of teach and blowing on it in juuuust the right way that it cools down ”But not too cold, or you’ll ruin it!”
Brushing Appa of course. Zuko would be pretty decent at that, but would come back to Aang absolutely covered in slobber and bison hair. “Awww! He likes you! <3″
Then it’d be calming meditation and slowing Zuko’s breathing (”But I am calm!”), tracking an elusive and nigh legendary animal so they can ride it, teaching patience by baking the perfect cake ”You just slapped the frosting on! It looks awful! *airbends it into the horizon* “Again!”
When Zuko finally gets it right, he almost smiles at Aang saying: “Excellent work, my student.” Then to Zuko’s consternation and horror Aang flings it at the head of the Fire Nation Governor during a political function. “And now we run!”
Pranks would be absolutely the thing that would bluescreen Zuko. Here’s an airbending master, over a century old, witnessed the genocide of his people, and he’s juggling, doing dances and tricks with Momo for the village kids, and plaguing the local aristocrats and military officers with flying cakes and whoopie cushions.
“How am I supposed to beat the Firelord with whoopie cushions?!”
And then, perfectly serious for the first time since Zuko had met him: “You don’t. The Avatar is about restoring balance. This training isn’t so you can fight the Firelord - it’s so you can stop a war.”
It takes a long time for Zuko to understand this. But the weird thing is: the townsfolk actually like Aang. Sure the aristocrats and crooked merchants and the officers don’t, but even the common Fire Nation infantry hide their chuckles with a cough when they see their commander’s fancy armor get covered in honey and feathers by “Crazy Aang,” again.
And Zuko realizes, at that moment, that he’s been having fun.
So, waking early, with no prompting from Aang, Zuko feeds Momo, brushes Appa, washes off the slobber, brews Aang his morning tea -perfectly cooled- and then proceeds to make a new, beautiful cake with no explanation.
“That looks wonderful, my student. Your best yet! Who were you planning to-”
Then Zuko smashes it in Aang’s face.
It’s the first time since coming out of the ice that Avatar Zuko laughs.
Zuko meets Bumi and oh Agni no there’s two of them
Toph still has to come into the team to teach him earthbending cuz she’s not missing ANOTHER life changing field-trip (feels-trip) with Zuko
But Aang and Bumi have been hanging out on and off over the century (and the White Lotus is Noticeably Different For It) so obviously the kids ask why
Aang’s still teaching the avatar; why won’t Bumi?
And Bumi stares them all dead in the eye, points at Aang, and says in a total deadpan “because if I have to sleep next to this asshole for more than a week I’ll kill you all myself”
And then cartwheels away laughing