Eyefucked by Tony the Tiger in the Cereal Aisle

Adult. Bidoof Enjoyer. Math Enjoyer. Icon by ironic-orange and header by doomspiral

[soul-hammered]

liking art for libidinal reasons instead of lofty 'this says a lot about our society' ones is fine actually.

[yandereleorio]

Surely i can follow along w the exercises in this us naval academy book. Right. I am perhaps enough of a glutton for puzzles right? Spirit of yugi mutou?

[yandereleorio]

Brain is dragging ass anytime i try to read my history books bcs i know these are next to my bed, whispering.

[nyctosaurid]

barnyard the original party animals is the uncontested lord of bad implications in childrens movies

[nyctosaurid]

ok so like “the secret life of x” movies tend to not strongly explore the actual reasons why, exactly, their life has to be secret… they don’t really focus on it within the narrative. They do usually have some small justification for why animals or video games or toys or whatever have never just revealed themselves:

There’s no stated reason. They just pretend to not be alive. We usually can suspend our suspension of disbelief here because when it’s something like a video game or an emoji because any odd occurrences is perceived as a glitch or something similar but the actual reason why they aren’t too hung up on this kinda shitty lot in life isn’t said

They get something out of their current relationship with humans (like in toy story)

They have some specific reason to hide that they’re alive, like they die if they’re seen (like in the christmas toy)

They perceive themselves as sentient, talking creatures, but humans can’t understand them. They just see a squeaking mouse or an inanimate hot dog or whatever. 

and the last one is what most animal movies do, and it’s like, not devoid of weird implications but you can see where it mostly works.

but barnyard is the outlier here: it goes with tier one: the animals can talk and walk on two legs but just pretend that they can’t for unstated reasons. 

in the history of the barnyard world non human animals, at some point, decided to just pretend to be unable to speak. a “cow” or a “coyote” or a “hen” do not exist as we know it in the barnyard universe. the baa of the sheep is false; the ewe doesn’t understand it either. they only made up that noise to hide the fact that they speak human languages. a dog barking and running on all fours is a facade. animals naturally walk on their hind legs and made up whole postures just to appear non sentient.

and for what? what do they gain from this? they have no rights and no voice by their own choice. at one point a donkey claims the farmer is a good person because he’s vegan and a pig mentions bacon - this is not a fantasy universe devoid of death and misery and meat. do animals, in hushed whispers, remind their children not to sob in their real voice as they’re taken away? do the dogs not beg for kindness when they’re tied up and hit? do cows and chickens not cry for their life in the slaughterhouses? does a rat not scream a human scream when the trap misses their neck and only breaks their spine? Why? what is the point? They loose so much and have everything to gain.

anyways does everyone remember this really awful cat. it only appears in one scene but i can just sense the porn of it that would pop up if i googled it’s name

[inkthecryptid]

This post is like being tied to a chair as a a joker-style villain monologues and presses a gun closer and closer to my head as he reaches the climax of his rehearsed piece on the flaws of society and when he finally pulls the trigger it’s a little flag that says “bang!”

[gecko-with-a-greatsword]

*guy who doesn't know anything about sports and has never cared about sports in his life* hey did you know womens professional baseball is returning after 70 years and the games are going to be streamed for free on youtube and the season starts august 1st

[steelydanyaoi]

freak as fuck sign

[fishing-princess]

For thousands of years humanity has selectively bred chickens to have larger breasts and to have to lay eggs constantly. We did it to get more meat and per chicken, but from the perspective of the domesticated chickens they’re sorta living in a very specific fetish scenario

[aliceoverzero]

The first tags I see on this are absolutely inspired. Incredible pervert lesbian website.

[ubercharge]

after i finished this i paused and thought i don't have the heart to eat these women. but maybe you do. if you're hungry

[seerofmike]

i meant could you tag it as Dead Dove: Do Not Eat?

i feel like this is a pretty redundant tag unless im misunderstanding how the dead dove tag works? the fic is already tagged pretty extensively warning for violence, noncon, drug use, psychosis, etc.,

[bunkey]

notice how everyone is horny today

[bunkey]

[batmanshole]

crisp glass of water moodboard

[noknowshame]

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

[batmanshole]

crisp glass of water moodboard

[seraphrain]

[todays-xkcd]

NGS and IERS are complaining that they left CLEAR instructions to set the washing machine to WGS84 (G2296) instead of WGS84 (G730).

Latitude and Longitude [Explained]

Transcript Under the Cut

[An image of the Earth showing most of Europe, Asia, Africa, and the Indian Ocean, with horizontal latitude lines and vertical longitude lines looking like a balloon tied tightly with string - like the lines are squeezed down into the surface.]

[Caption below the panel:] Bad news: NASA accidentally shrank Earth's latitude and longitude lines in the wash.

[sand-and-swamp-and-wildfire]

what does ludwig see when he blinks

Beautiful and endless green fields and a sea of flowers that one might find appropriate to bring to a funeral

[sand-and-swamp-and-wildfire]

Sketch I hadn't seen before I gave that answer:

[zombieritual]

well personally i like it when there’s incest and necrophilia and murder and cannibalism and abuse and torture and gore and mutilation and body horror and sexual depravity and death.

[winpocalypse]

[wiltkingart]

hard x soft

[pspsappho]

& honestly there's no debate to be had the zendaya earrings are orders of magnitude worse than kim kardashian wearing that marilyn dress. yes that piece was a one of a kind unique textile made so specifically for marilyn monroe she had to be sewn into it. at the end of the day it was a ~70 year old usamerican cultural artefact being repurposed by an american for an american cultural event and everyone involved knows exactly where the dress came from + what happened to it + where it went afterwards. zendaya is wearing the looted (or forged) cultural heritage of a people her government is currently bombing & whose lives they have been deliberately making unliveable for decades to a movie premiere that has fuck all to do with iran. we don't know where those discs came from where they were found or by whom & we never will. AND the jeweller appears to have altered them substantially from their original condition. destroying a people's cultural heritage at the same time you destroy their country + their lives so you can look good on a red carpet One Time i want to fucking hurl

[afusionoffandoms]

Zendaya is getting dragged for 3,000-year-old The Odyssey earrings, and it's a fair point

An archeologist said she finds it 'gross'

Zendaya Gets an Earful of ‘Orientalist’ Complaints for Wearing Ancient Iranian Earrings to ‘Odyssey’ Promo Amid US-Iran War

Actress Zendaya has been on the receiving end of piercing criticism after wearing ancient Iranian earrings to a promo for the epic film The