[navigatorsnorth]

Phenomenal spare wheel cover I walked past the other day

[nepenthean-sleep]

straight white people making a romance movie: haha what if it was illegal to have sex? wait what's lawrence v texas. wait what's mclaughlin v florida. wait what's loving v virginia

[draconym]

The eye doctor is the most fun doctor you can go to. They never steal your blood. They never make you get naked and put on a paper dress. They're just like, "Can you see these letters? It's fine if you can't, we can fix that." And they don't even spell anything.

[draconym]

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[destinationtoast]

dying at this sequence from @pinkydragon01 :

[halfbloodfanboy]

[kocoumbuthessoserious]

I’m getting married and that’s wonderful. My parents don’t support it and aren’t coming (because of gay) so I’m no longer talking to them. My sister thinks I’m a villain now because of how “hard it’s been” on them so now she doesn’t know if she’s going to come. And then my dad texts me to tell me my mom has skin cancer and had 65% of her nose removed and I don’t know what to do. Everyone’s advice is to hold steady and not break no contact but the guilt is eating me alive. So now I’m shouting to the void I guess.

[bish0ps]

Remember when you could look things up online. Do you remember how we used to search

[thememedaddy]

[floatingstirnerhead]

A kitchen is a research lab for new ways to say I love you

[elexecution]

its awesome theres a vampire on sesame street because you need to introduce children to the concept as early as possible

[trattenbach]

Happy Battle Against Richard Nixon's Immortal Soul Saturday

[carebewear]

I do often think about how the origin of “he would not fucking say that” was in reference to a post which depicted Cartman SouthPark responding politely when asked for his pronouns

[schistcity]

meme phrases are so mobile and versatile and that's really really beautiful but i'm always thinking about the first "she x on my y til i z" being "she ebbin on my neezer til i scrooge" and the first "fork found in kitchen" coming from a tweet about sehun from exo being spotted at a gay bar. like sometimes you just utterly nail it the very first time and no variation of the joke is going to be better.

[schistcity]

EXACTLY.

[schistcity]

a small collection

[nightporter1980]

i would so love to know what was going on in this persons head. i would rather be shot dead than sneak food into a movie theatre. What?

[augustheart]

this tweet is ruining my life rn

[memewhore]

[turnabout]

these two communicate on a level we cannot understand with current language.

[desolendate]

im literally in tears what the fuck

[jessekingman-deactivated2020092]

if i see a group of men laughing i just know its not funny

[anik]

i love this guy