He can tell that Jeongguk is frustrated, by the way his eyes begin to well up, his voice quivering with each syllable. It makes Taehyung’s heart clench, almost, almost making a move to take the singer back into the safety of his arms. But then, all too easily, he is remembering the jolts of pain and anguish he felt over Jeongguk’s lack of loyalty. He said it had all been a mistake, that he regret it and regret it and regret it. But who was Taehyung to believe him now, after he’d essentially lied about the entire situation before?
“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Taehyung grumbles, watching Jeongguk with disbelief. “Do you expect me to just give in like that? It’s not that easy, Jeongguk.”
Taehyung lets out a long sigh, his eyes on Jeongguk, giving a look of pity. How sad, for him to have clung so desperately to any last hope of them getting back together, only for Jeongguk to have thrown it out with a simple one night stand. Was it going to be worth it all, if they were to continue having issues with simple communication? Taehyung isn’t sure.
“That’s the thing, Jeongguk. I don’t even know if we can make things right.”
This must have been Jeongguk’s closest thing he could describe as a near-death experience. He sworn to himself on that moment, that he had his life taken away from his eyes, and his drunkenness was not making him see things that are not really there. Taehyung was Jeongguk’s life. He isn’t in the right position to announce that to the world right now, though. Never mind his standpoint of his career; that was the second reason why he can’t admit to everyone that he believes Taehyung gives him life.
The first reason is because how many times Jeongguk would try to bend his words, he is considered an unfaithful boyfriend to Taehyung.
Taehyung’s tone of disappointment and hurt was Hell. If his I love you’s and soft kisses were Jeongguk’s version of Heaven, then the cold truth is his personal damnation. Jeongguk could almost feel the tears that are on the verge of spilling; he could almost feel his legs voluntarily walking up to Taehyung to close in the frightening distance they possess in between, and he could almost reach out his hand to try to feel any connection he could possibly grasp from Taehyung.
But almost is a sad word. It will never fulfil what’s supposed to be done, no matter how hard Jeongguk could have tried. Almost will never make things enough.
“It’s not easy, Jeongguk.
I don’t even know if we can make things right.”
“Taehyun—“ Jeongguk’s steps were clumsy, stumbling over his own feet… or so he thought. A distinctive force had made him stop in his own tracks, his shoulders was caught by a pair, and a voice that gives Jeongguk a sudden cold feet.
“Stop this, Jeongguk. I’ve heard and seen enough of… this.”
He wishes this part is something his dumb drunk mind had imagined. But no, it was painfully real and it terrified Jeongguk even more to see his manager right up close, with eyes full of rage and a hint of disgust he has never seen before. What’s worse is that Jeongguk knows what will happen next. “H-Hyung…” was the only word he could manage to let out. His manager was blocking Jeongguk’s view of Taehyung, and the singer, his expression mixed with different emotions, was tear-stricken trying to get off from the steady grip of his manager.
Jeongguk’s huge built was definitely no match for the strength his manager has. “No, please, let me talk to him a bit more—“was Jeongguk’s plea, his tears free-flowing and struggling to break free from the tight grips of the hands and frame of his manager. He didn’t want this to happen. All that Jeongguk ever wanted was to build trust, to make him seem more dependable. But he was gravely mistaken. He never did his calculations right. He never wanted to make Taehyung to resent his existence.
Jeongguk didn’t want any of this to happen.
Maybe because it’s already late at night, or maybe because Jeongguk definitely deserves it. But a punch thrown at his face was a quick way to stop resisting his manager’s hold on him. Jeongguk didn’t see it coming, especially from his hyung that he depended on so much, but maybe that’s the price of lying and bending the company’s rules. The punch had thrown Jeongguk on the ground, his hands quick to pick up the sudden pace, making him save himself from the fall. Jeongguk’s jaw was aching yet somehow his chest hurts more than the bruises that were given.
Jeongguk didn’t want for Taehyung to see him like this. He has experienced hunger and poverty before, but he believes this is his lowest point. He didn’t want for Taehyung to see him on his lowest point. Getting rejected by Taehyung, getting disciplinary actions from his manager, and a crowd seeing and judging Jeongguk’s actions all night – he wishes to fade away.
His eyes were shutting close from the different kinds of pain he’s experiencing right now, almost as if he was about to pass out, yet his manager’s voice was clear in his head, hearing it all.
“Taehyung… did I got it right?” His manager was now facing Taehyung, without any hint of regret that he had punched Jeongguk square up just to shut up. “Jeongguk and I are going to go now. In behalf of our company, I appreciate it if you severe all connections from our artist. It is for the best you two are strangers again.”
“Let’s go, Jeongguk. Party’s over. You and I have a lot to talk about.”
