Lore Discourse Nobody Wanted
Pretty much everything that’s ever happened or will happen in any MMORPG’s lore can be summed-up by mentioning one group’s name because everything comes back to that one particular group fucking-up everything for everyone
The whole plot of World of Warcraft can be explained by one word: Mages
How did the ancient Eredar of Argus come into contact with the Burning Legion? MAGES doing MAGE things, which is apparently an inter-galactic booty-call for all manner of Demons
Who nearly destroyed Azeroth by casually inviting the Legion to a pool party? Queen Azshara and her Highborne MAGES
How were Demons finding their way to Azeroth between the War of the Ancients and the modern day? Dalaran, a city of MAGES. It became such a demonic hot-spot that they had to make a giant-ass MAGE to fight them off
Who brought the Horde to Azeroth? That same giant-ass MAGE who was supposed to keep Demons off the planet
How was Archimonde going to destroy Azeroth in the Third War? By using MAGE powers to corrupt a giant-ass tree that was fed by the same pool water the Highborne MAGES got their power from
Who would become the Arch-Lich of the Undead Scourge? Kel’thuzad, a MAGE in Dalaran—the MAGE city—who did MAGE things to corpses
How could Kael’thas take power from enslaved Naaru and the Twisting Nether via the wreck of the Draenei vessel known as Tempest Keep? He was a MAGE who led MAGES to do MAGE things
What caused an Ogre of the Twilight’s Hammer Clan to become a crazy, physical abomination who would later convert people to a dangerous, mad cult that worshiped the Old Gods, which nearly destroyed the world? MAGE powers Cho’gall had, all that extra MAGE power he got from the Old Gods and he gave other MAGES more MAGE powers to help him destroy the world
Milhouse Manastorm, imprisoned for magical crimes and later a powerful agent of the Twilight Cult? A MAGE
In alternate-timeline Draenor, how was Ner’zhul going to use a fallen Naaru to destroy Shadowmoon Valley? By using his MAGE powers to throw it out of space and down on Velen’s head because he was a MAGE
Worgen in Silverpine Woods and Gilneas? Arugal, a MAGE
And if you think Sylvanas only used handmade torches to burn Teldrassil or that it’s just non-magical Goblin miners handling those magical dark crystals from Sargeras’ sword that’s currently sticking-out of Silithus, you’re wrong. MAGES are also there
Next hot take will be on the Elder Scrolls universe (where everything is the Elves’ fault)
areudirty
dededos
jacobvanloon
yousharknotpass
prguitarman
theartofmadeline
origamiaround
gummygunk
stormborns
romaincrisis
baratheonpilled
