trying on a metaphor
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Origami Around
Cosmic Funnies
Peter Solarz
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pixel skylines
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
JVL
izzy's playlists!
Love Begins
Keni
blake kathryn
roma★
tumblr dot com
ojovivo
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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Kiana Khansmith
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
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@kylaslifee
So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized
Dr. Robert Evans
I looked it up
My dentist is Captain America’s dad
My doctor is JK Rowling’s husband.
JK Rowling’s husband has asked me if I am sexually active.
*me trying to write 2000 word essays*
HAPPY NEW YEARS these pictures are bad but my attitude is worse
I wanna try this thing this year where I say one thing good that's happened to me that day so here goes...
1st January 2015: I got to go swimming with my sister
When you have to hold the mcdonalds bag in the car so you eat fries out of everyone else’s fry and then take the one with the most when you get home
everything gets so much funnier at 2am
Boy: How tall are you?
Me: Hopefully 5'9. That's what I was last time and I haven't really grown. Most guys I take interest in are like 5'4 or something and I'm just like oh, nothing against short guys but i want to wear heels to my wedding.
Me: Not that I'm thinking about marrying you it's just what I want
Me: Not that I wouldn't marry you I mean you seem nice and you're attractive
Boy:
Me:
Boy:
Me: I'll shutup now
overhearing a conversation between strangers in which they’re saying something completely wrong and you really feel like correcting them
I honestly can’t think of a more accurate picture than this
Merry Christmas.
“Steve Carell, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert: How men would look if they had to pose in ads the way women are expected to.”
Yeah this definitely deserves a place on my blog
im so glad I woke up this morining
HELENA BONHAM CARTER AND TIM BURTON HAVE SPLIT UP
LOVE ISNT REAL
GOD IS DEAD
it’s a nightmare before Christmas
foods that will poison cats:
alcohol
chocolate
caffeine
dairy products (adults turn lactose intolerant)
fat trimmings, raw meat, eggs, fish
grapes and raisins
onions and garlic
tuna (when not made for cats)
xylitol (artificial sweetener)
if you have a cat please reblog this
Even if you don’t have a cat please reblog this for all your followers who may have their own precious little baby.
i-grab-de-skillet-and-bash-u:
Man forgets he is married after surgery (x)
"Why are you still obsessed with Ferguson?" Because a kid is dead and his murderer is still free.
EXCUSE ME U LIL BETCH THAT WAS A GOOD #AMAZING JOKE THERE #YOU PIECE OF SHIT HOW DARE YOU INSULT ME THEN CHANGE THE TOPIC. #YOU'RE A ROBOT WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT JOKES
I'm not sure if your followers know much about the man Harry just Instagrammed, but Basquiat was a neo-expressionist artist who died in 1988. I hope this quote sums up the importance pretty well: "The film Basquiat ( 1996 ) was directed by Julian Schnabel and the more recent documentary Radiant Child ( 2010 ) was directed by Tamra Davis. In both, the artist is portrayed as something of a "ladies' man," even though there has always been clear evidence that, in fact, he was not straight."
Well this just got interesting..
ahh yes so apparently the trick is to not take selfies in the backseat of a moving vehicle if you want a good picture
#how is that a bad picture #I want to stab you for being so pretty #you look stunning
