I’m watching Deep In and a lot of the questionable things Zhen Xin is doing with/to Zhun is pretty spot on for me (not in a good way).
It’s spot on because I’ve experienced these things and it’s why I find men to be wholly despicable.
I know guys who…
* would kiss you when you’re drunk.
* would try to create scenarios where they can make moves on you (like Zhen pushing for them to rehearse the explicit scenes just so he can make out)
* would get jealous of you and other people when they’re already in a relationship.
* would objectify their girlfriends or wives when their self-control is in shambles (like how Zhen keeps telling his girlfriend to come so he doesn’t fall for someone else.)
This is why I don’t believe the toxic trope should be completely eradicated. Despicable men exist in real life and the sad part is that there’s someone out there who wants them and would put up with everything and anything to have them.
Despicable men exist in real life and they still win.
That cheating uncle is still regarded as the best husband and upstanding father by someone or some people who know him.
These men exist in straight relationships, and also in queer ones. I have notes on a few friends and I know what they’ve done and what they’ve received from their significant others.
People quickly hate on these shows with grey characters when truly, these type of men are living and breathing with us. I sit for these shows because they serve as a reminder that the world isn’t a fairytale.
Not everyone is a Prince Charming who’d respect boundaries and be morally upright their whole life. I can count the number of guys I can vouch for and I still wouldn’t trust them.
Now all this talk was for Zhen Xin. The next person is Zhun.
I haven’t watched ep 4 and 5 yet but from what I’ve seen, he’s also fighting temptation with his co-star. The difference between them is that one is bold and immoral while the other is timid and also immoral.
Both are literally cheating on their girlfriends because the method acting stopped being method acting two episodes ago.
Zhun also hides behind “we’re rehearsing” to explore his fascination with Zhen. Even while drunk, he tries to stay in character and pushes for deep intimacy. I’m truly not one to extend grace to someone when they’re very much complicit in their own predicament. It’s why I never victim-painted Wu Suo Wei because his manipulative ass seduced Chi Cheng and continued to chase after such a man with zero regards for boundaries. You can’t play with a wild dog and be shocked that it bit you. Similarly, you can’t see the warning signs and color it with “it’s all for work.”
Zhun knows that he’s attracted to Zhen but cowers from it and hasn’t really addressed it. I know money has to be made and there’s pressure from all sides to get married but what can possibly justify you being drunk over your mind and begging your co-star to kiss you while you’re still in character? In fact, how drunk can you be to get into character like that?
Maybe it’s still too early to judge but I’m not sold on the “he’s being taken advantage of” discourse just yet.
P.s I’m not making excuses for either of them. I’ve dealt with a handful of victim-playing friends in the past so it’s really difficult for me to not be skeptical about this dynamic.
There’s also the fact that in consensual-nonconsensual setups, the sub tends to act like they never invited the attention and action. Like they weren’t provoking the dom. Like they didn’t want it when truly, they did.
Again, still too early to judge. But I just wanted to lay my two cents out for now.
