it me, l.a.

Author, general nuisance, she/her

[laguettler]

[laguettler]

"Did you know that all of L.A. Guettler's books are available on KU?"

www.laguettler.com

[laguettler]

Me starting a writing project vs me finally hitting "publish"

[laguettler]

! ! ! ! ! COVER REVEAL ! ! ! ! !

Isn't it glorgeous? Jason Kemp of Tenkara Studios absolutely captured the vintage look of those old interactive books we grew up with.

Coming soon! (Don't worry, I'll make sure you know.)

www.linktr.ee/laguettler

[laguettler]

It's almost ready: my interactive adventure novel VACATION ON PLANET GLOR. Full cover reveal TOMORROW.

[laguettler]

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Pickman's Model

HP Lovecraft: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the story of the pickman's model Lovecraft: what if there was a painting so scary Lovecraft: like it was so scary Lovecraft: like SO scary

Lovecraft: so there's this painting that's SO scary you can't look at it Barker: what happens if you look at it Barker: do you go insane Lovecraft: Lovecraft: yeah you go insane Barker: damn howard really going outside your wheelhouse tonight Poe: clive don't start

Lovecraft: so this painting is so scary that you can't even look at it King: wow! imagine if there was a painting like that! Stephen Gammell:

Garrett Cook: a scary painting huh? i got a twist on that Cook: what if a picture was scary Cook: because it was drawn with haunted chalk? Lovecraft: Cook: just think about it for a minute

Lovecraft: oh yeah that's good Cook: like, chalk cursed by the soul of a debauched libertine Lovecraft: oh no i don't like that Barker: wait wait i want to hear more about that Lovecraft: but clive Barker: shut up howard Barker: adults are talking

Lovecraft: no guys you don't understand Lovecraft: the reason that the painting is so scary Lovecraft: is it's a painting of, like, a scary dog Dean Koontz: i wouldn't be scared of a dog Lovecraft: oh you'd be scared of this dog, dean Lovecraft: it's real scary

Lovecraft: but the scariest thing about this scary dog Lovecraft: is Lovecraft: wait for it Lovecraft: the scary dog is real Koontz: what! Lovecraft: it turns out pickman drew it from life! Lovecraft: from his model! Lovecraft: pickman's model!

Koontz: gosh howard Koontz: i think that's just great! Koontz: seeing a picture of a dog is great Koontz: but then finding out that the dog is real and you can go see the real dog Koontz: that's even better!

Lovecraft: dean you don't understand!   Lovecraft: the dog is evil! Koontz: i don't believe that   Koontz: there are no bad dogs

[laguettler]

Ninth House aerobics never really took off, did it

[see-arcane]

Dracula: Hm, that human mother is being super annoying about her dead kid at the gate. How do I fix that? Wolves? I’ll say wolves.

Dracula: What’s that? My good friend Jonathan Harker wants to leave ahead of schedule? Think I’ll do some wolves about that.

Dracula: Damn, seems that old Dutchman has blocked off one (1) single window with garlic blossoms and now this one (1) specific girl in all of England is barred from me. Maybe I should use my title and/or some invented pretense to cajole the girl’s mother into letting me in. Or maybe I could just move on to a different victim out of the nigh endless blood buffet I specifically moved here to enjoy, none of whom have a small legion of blood donors and vampire-proofing scholars on their side.

Dracula:

Dracula, about to slam dunk a wolf through the window: Or,

[laguettler]

Use the promo code OSSLIFE at checkout to get free shipping! Offer valid only in the nine houses, while supplies last.

[rain-44]

Idk if anyone has already done it

[beezelbubbles]

Okay I have Mithraeum questions. Harrow's bathtub exploded. Did she get a new one? Did she just make one out of bone? I know there wasn't much water in it at the time but was there then some water damage?

Who does maintenance? There are no servants or staff. Are the lyctors in charge of that? Or do they bring in a crew once in a while? Like the training room also got pretty well exploded, as did the incinerator. So... who's gonna deal with that? Related, who does the dishes? Did Mercymorn make up a chore chart? I bet she did and Augustine, G1deon, and Jod all swap jobs and ignore it and generally are the asses they are. So she passive aggressively updates it and posts it in increasingly unhinged places with more and more underlines and exclamation points. Is there a laundry room?

Did Harrow and Ianthe have any of their own clothes? Cause it sounds like they didn't come with their own stuff. Or at least not much. Jod knew he had potential new lyctors coming, but didn't clean out Cyrus and Valancy's room. (Not that Ianthe seems to mind.) But okay, if it had been best case scenario (uh depending on who you ask) and he got 8 new lyctors, are there no spare rooms? Because where was he going to put them? We've got 3, so that's 5 empty rooms. Would the Fourth bunk with the Fifth? Let's pretend in this scenario it worked because that was Dulcinea and not Cytherea. Would she and Palamedes go ahead and hook up and share? What was your plan here, John? (There wasn't one. I don't think he expected new lyctors, honestly.)

[navysealt4t]

reblog to violently explode a trans kid’s transphobic teacher

[thatsbelievable]

[laguettler]

It's September! Time for my locked tomb brain rot to seem seasonable instead of weird.

(Illustration from The Skull by Jon Klassen)

[laguettler]

"Good morning, class! Welcome to Double Bones. I'm Dr Skelebone. Please review the information on the board for our lab today...yes? You have a question, Harrowhark?

"I prefer Reverend Daughter."

"Apologies. What's your question?"

"Can the bones be our own?"

[beezelbubbles]

Credit to @thatsbelievable for the image, I believe. Dr. Skelebones is a stickler for proper citations.

[thatsbelievable]

Thank you for the shout-out, @beezelbubbles ! This is indeed some of our nonsense.

[laguettler]

Thanks for adding the citation! I didn't know the source

[laguettler]