a mal tiempo, buena cara @laneblinosa - Tumblr Blog

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#LANEBLINOSA ; highly selective, canon-compliant pepa madrigal from disney’s encanto. low-activity, semi-iconless, multi-para inclined. south american + spanish speaking. primarily exploring the themes of accepting imperfection, motherhood, and self-hood. prompt + plot driven. // CARRD. ©

#indie rp #animated rp #encanto rp #self promo #realized i never did this uhhh important step. whoops.#better late than never

@ratsalong; BRUNO

❛ it’s easy for you, after all. ❜

she was too far gone to even pretend to control her emotions. it would be polite to do so, but this was bruno. bruno who wasn’t a stranger, wasn’t a tourist, much less a friend. bruno was her brother, as reliable and permanent as her left hand.

she would chop off her hand with a dull knife right now.

there is a phantom pain along the top of her head, prickling down the back of her neck, and gone with an exhale. she doesn’t have any weather to control and there is none of the tug that had always come with it for the last forty-five years. it’s only been a handful of days since they’d found mirabel, a handful of days of not shouldering the responsibility of the sun and clouds.

( she’s still not sure if this is better. how does one start over with grace when their downfall didn’t hold any? she is someone who had felt rock-bottom many times over within the safety of her room and the sanctity of church. yet, there was always a level lower waiting her arrival. would this be the final descent? )

her rage exploded as the wisps of bygone static left her nerves be, a release granted in the knowledge that if anyone would get hurt now it would just be them. there was no need to worry about the rest of their family or the encanto. spanish flew off her tongue, her voice low even as her cheeks burned hot.

“easy? you think it’s easy for me to talk because i’m not the one who hide away the last fifteen years? you think that it’s easy to look these people in the eyes and know that it was my storm, my feelings, ME — i’m the one that caused their windows to fly off and their fences to break? do you think i don’t have blood in my face, in my chest, that i don’t know shame?"

pepa’s face was not close to touching bruno’s, but she could see herself reflected in his green eyes. once upon a childhood, they joked that they shared their eyes. once upon a childhood, they shared lives. tears gathered in her eyes, and pepa closed them as she pulled herself back. her hands fisted, elbows bent with hunched shoulders in a posture that clearly screamed to be left alone. but she had to get the words out or they would find a way to drown her.

“none of this has ever been easy. not all of us could hide away. but if you’d stayed then...” her cowardice overtook her survival and she choked. she would drown later. “if you’d stayed then you would know,” came its weak replacement.

#ratsalong #im not translating all that

@bluexletter; DOLORES

❛ you really don’t care about any of this , do you ? ❜

this was not a unique experience. she knew that many mothers, ever since motherhood started, had all gone through moments where they simply couldn't find the energy to maintain the interest their children demanded of them. but even knowing that, giving it that name — that it was a demand, that it fell to the children — it sits unevenly in her stomach. so much so that the empty white clouds above her begin to swirl in darkening shades of guilt.

it was so much harder for her to be able to disguise her waning interest. it was equal parts the curse of her ( so called, little felt ) gift and her own personality. how much the latter was based without influence of the former was not a thought to permit right now, when her daughter's voice was sounding so small.

what hurt more? the fact that she had been caught or the thought of how little dolores had actually spoken before realizing? truthfully, her children knew better than to gauge her mood by her weather. her daughter's gift allowed her to listen in to more than just the details of her static and winds, and pepa checked in with her heartbeat. it was steady and patient.

it was bored and distant.

her hands flew up to wipe away at her clouds. fruitless, as the grey wisps swiftly returned by the time her hands returned to her lap. "no, muñeca, no." her fingers interlocked and she let a long breath silently release from her nose. this was not yet a battle, this wasn't even an argument. she could still keep this going and ignore the want to tuck tail so to avoid tripping into her own sword.

"i'm a little tired and i've always loved hearing you talk. me relaja hasta los huesos." pepa smiled and while she couldn't make it reach her eyes, her cloud lightened to her lips lifting. "dimelo otra vez. i like our conversations."

#tr. it relaxes me to my bones #tr. tell me again #bluexletter #pre canon #who needs character growth when drama is the call?#god help me with this new text editor

ratsalong

hi ench

laneblinosa

🤔

#dont get my hopes up

fairydrowning

[ Kyung-Sook Shin, Please Look After Mom, trans. Chi-Young Kim / Ocean Vuong, On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous / by "bitterl" on Tumblr / by "geloyconcepcion" on Instagram / Annie Ernaux, I Remain in Darkness / by "honeytuesday" on Tumblr / unknown / Fariha Roisin, How to Cure a Ghost / 'Mother Holding Child' by Gustav Klimt 1905 / Ritika Jyala, excerpt from 'The Flesh I Burned' ]

#[ alma ]

[blows the dust off this blog]

#is anyone alive.

geryone

Dog Woman, Chris Abani

#[ bruno ]#[ pedro ]

weltenwellen

Ono no Komachi & Izumi Shikibu, tr. by Jane Hirshfield & Mariko Aratani, The Ink Dark Moon: Love Poems by Ono no Komachi and Izumi Shikibu, Women of the Ancient Court of Japan

#[ ISMS ]

thatsbelievable

#[ ISMS ]

i keep saying that i will write here again and not just reblog things that make me weep abt pepa + everyone in her life. yet. i have nothing to prove otherwise.

#[ OOC ]#i write one sentence and im like yup! job done!