Even if it hurts to death, I am hiding myself under a mask for you
โ
โ
Seonghwa stared at the golden lines etched into the dark royal blue invitation card he held it in his left hand. The words once written to celebrate a new life seemed to be mocking at his self.
A wedding invitation. His wedding invitation. The one which now no longer existed.
The more he stared at he, the more he felt his heart wretch itself further into pieces as if it already wasn't barely holding onto itself after all this while. It took everything in him to sit upright on the bed, focusing on the creaking sound of the fan in the room to maintain a neutral outlook.
His brain was loud, too loud. Yet, it still wasn't able to block out the sounds of clothes being packed in the same room as him. He couldn't bring himself to look at you, packing the last of your belongings with a stoic face, tired. He deluded himself to believe that it was because of his pride.
Instead he forced himself to gaze away from the card and divert it to the large mirror standing proud in front of the bed, just a bit to the right to where he was sitting. This was the first time he had seen his reflection since the day he ended the relationship. This was the first time he truly saw the way his deteriorating self was barely holding on.
Pale skin, dark eye bags, hair unkempt, cheeks sunken in a bit, tired, dishevelled appearance in general. His reflection mocked him too. Scoffing at his pathetic cowardness. Looking like wanting to break out of the barrier of mirror when it was but a expression of not the mirror but of his inner conscious. A
It was but a lie, not to others, but to himself. A beautiful lie that was made, now having to be kept.
But whenever you saw him, you never saw his smile leave his face; even if you knew it was all fake, a lie.
โ
โ
I won't hang onto you, I will smile. This is me, don't hesitate anymore. Leave me
It's a beautiful pain, letting you go. I have to kill myself inside, swallow my tears and put on a smiling mask
โ
โ
Seonghwa wakes up with a gasp, clawing on his chest that was closing in on him, making it hard to breathe. Mind disoriented enough to not notice the tears streaming down his face till he felt them drop onto his other hand clutching the blanket. It was that dream again. Memories of the worst day in his life โ cutting off ties with you completely and letting you go. Sending you off with a smile that would continue to haunt him every breath he took.
But he doesn't regret it, no.
He would make the same choice again if given the chance. Just to see you happy in your life; something he couldn't give you. No matter how much it hurt even after months, where waking up every day felt like torture, he was willing to live like that. He didn't know whether he would ever be able to overcome that feeling but he wasn't regretful.
โ
โ
I feel so relieved now. Please don't worry about me.
There are only 2 rules when it comes to writing fanfics:
Write whatever you want.
Have fun doing it.
Thatโs literally it. There is no โshow and donโt tellโ. There is no โmake it realisticโ. There is no โfit in with the trendsโ. And of course, there is no โwrite as fast as possible to keep up engagement and please othersโ.
No.
Most fanfiction writers are not professional writers. This isnโt a job, weโre literally writing for shits and giggles. We donโt have a team of editors behind us to make our story perfect. Fanfiction isnโt about creating the most perfect plot with the most perfect prose and the most perfect pacing.
Fanfiction writing is for you first. To make your heart happy. Other people just get the benefit to also enjoy it if they wish.
Thatโs it.
Write whatever makes you happy, with whatever writing style you want, whenever you want.
3. Be respectful of the original creators requests.
I don't know why this one is so poisonous to many. It just comes across as decency. You like the persons works, you like the world and the characters they developed, and then you flip them the bird and twist it into betrayal for dopamine?
Covers anything between 'please don't ship/sexualize these characters, one is a minor' and 'please don't merchandise my work.'
Let's be cool to each other while also writing what makes us happy?
Idk whether i should cross post my night has come kdrama fic from ao3 to here because on one hand ofc as a writer I want people to read my fics but again, are there enough people interested in it
โธ Pairing: unspecified male oc x female oc, not a reader insert
โธ Genre: angst no comfort
โธ Warnings: major character death, mentions of blood
โธ A/n: A small work that I wrote because I couldn't write my actual chapters for my book. Couldn't make it gender neutral because it was written with two specific ocs in mind.
Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated.
"I feel tired," her voice sounded weak. A fishy taste rising up her throat as her eyelids fluttered, consciousness slipping away weighing heavy on them. 'This is it', she thought.
Slowly, it was getting harder to hold herself upright as she swayed around the smooth surface of the ballroom, dancing with him as the orchestra in the background slowly reached its climax, mirroring her situation. She knew that they'd end up in this way; either one of them being on the edge. They were doomed from the very beginning and shouldn't have crossed paths. Even with the many warnings and opportunities given to both to separate from each other, they insisted on continuing, knowing the end would be ugly for both, but at least they would be together. It just wasn't decided which of them would take the hit. Hence, even if they could be in the other's presence for one more moment before fate tore them apart, they chose to spend it with one another.
It was becoming apparent now as it was too late. This really was it, the end.
Still, she had a couple of minutesโthat too if she were lucky. Knowing there was no other way, she closed her eyes for a brief moment, accepting the reality. Opening her eyes, she let her gaze roam around the brightly lit ballroom for one last time, where many others danced along with the music. How happy they looked, dancing without much worryโliving without a careโwithout being weighed down by the heaviness of an impending sense of doom hanging on top of their heads.
Her lips gently curled up into a smile as she turned her head back to look at him one last time, wanting to spend her remaining moments left with him. Tears clouded his visionโrefusing to look at her, a sharp pain in the back of his throat, constraining his airway from guilt.
It should have been him.
It should have been him instead of her.
Oh how twisted the fate was to choose him to suffer with her remnants for the rest of his age as he felt her slowly slipping away from himโfrom the reality.
The only thoughts that occupied his mind were thoughts of not being strong enough, not being stubborn enough, not having a backbone to have stood up against his family, not hiding her away from the others where no one would know of them, not being convincing enough to let him take her away. And now, the only thing that remained was being surrounded by a mob of peopleโflocking to the event just to watch him and his lover sufferโreceiving looks of pity that mocked the pair as their feet guided them along the dancefloor, as they red string of fate bounding the two lovers, frailed at its middleโbarely holding on, ready to snap at any moment.
"Wouldn't you let me see your face for this one last time," she asked in a meek voice that wavered due to her own emotions. Choosing to ignore the engulfing silence from the lack of response, she rest her head against his chest, trying to find some comfort and warmth for one last time.
She couldn't let him see herself being afraid of death, one of them needed to be strong when the other wasn't able to.
"Why would you want to see the face of someone who caused you this?" His voice low as a whisper, trembling from being overwhelmed with emotions flooding him.
The fishy taste grew stronger as she could feel the blood rise up her throat faster. Hadn't it been for him holding her tightly, she would have fallen down as she felt her slowly losing her strength to even stand. Determined to not leave without looking at each other, she backed up a bit and with a great amount of effort lifted her hand to cup his face, turning his head to make him face her.
Feeling her weak and soft hand against his cheek, all of his restraints broke down. The moment his eyes gazed at her, the first drop of tear escaped from his eyes, unable to hold them back anymore.
She looked so frailโevery passing second made his heart beat increasing out of fear. The barrier of denial and anger, finally breaking down.
He wanted to tear the world apart to take her to someone who had the cure for her but deep down, both of them knew that it was too late.
This time when she spoke up, her voice was barely audible as she finally coughed up mouthfuls of blood caused by the poison, staining not just her expensive gown tailored specially for the evening but also the pristine suit of his; the ultimate sign. She tried to wipe at his suit in a futile attempt to clean the blood, not wanting to further stain him. In a state of panic at the sight of blood, he rushed to wipe off the blood from her mouth when she tried to smile her best before using her hoarse throat to tell him her final bidding.
"Thank you for loving me. I hope we can meet in another life where this wouldn't be our ending."
Fate didn't give her any more time as the sand in the hour glass had its final grain falling through onto the other side. Being stripped of her consciousness, her body fell limp in the arms of her lover, resting her eyes in peace as her body no longer suffered in the pain of being suffocated to death.
No longer fearing the judgement of the crowd, his knees buckled, falling on the ground with her now unresponsive body, clutching to her as if he was trying to steady his grip on the false hope of everything just being a nightmare that he would wake up from in any moment.
Caressing her face to wipe off the blood dripping down from her mouth, he tried everything he could to make her open her eyes and jump up, explaining that everything was just a very realistic but cruel-hearted prank.
Cradling her body as tightly as he could in hopes of feeling her slipping warmth to hold on to her, tears flooded down his face, screaming aloud in the middle of the floor. Voice echoing as the end of the music amplified the silence in the room. Wailing till his throat felt raw from all the emotions, he rocked back and forth with the now warmth lacking body as he loudly cursed out the stars.
Why them? What sins had they committed for them to be punished on such a cosmic level. One no longer alive after suffering while the other left behind to suffer for the rest of his time.
His cries raised some sympathetic gazes from the crowd while earning some with twisted content in their heart, feeling a sense of satisfaction at watching the pair who went against the customs and tradition be met with their demiseโa reminder to anyone else who dared to try and defy the rules.
None interfered. None dared to defy the orders of not only his parents, but also the rulers of the country.
Star crossed lovers
(adj)
refers to any lovers whose affection for each other is doomed to end inย tragedy.
I mostly post my own writings that don't have any specific pairings but I will write specific pairings if requested.
Requests will only be fulfilled if they fit into the rules and if I am open for taking requests.
โธ What I will write:
Fluff, angst, comfort, gore
โธ What I won't write:
Any type of smut, suggestive (because I just don't know how to write it)
โธWho I will write for:
I will write for kpop girl and boy groups but with mostly a fem reader or fem oc because I am not confident in writing about male readers. I will also write for kdramas. However, I won't take requests for people or characters that are problematic in real life.
I know i haven't been that active on this account but i am wondering whether you guys would like to request anything from boys planet since i can't get over that show
Sometimes fanfiction is a love letter to canon, and sometimes fanfiction is pounding on canon's door and yelling for it to get out here so you can kick its ass.
โธ Pairings: it's not a reader insert, more of just two characters that aren't specified. you can imagine any relationship, may be platonic or romantic but no incest and shit
โธ Genre: fluff
โธ Warnings: could seem as if allusions to death are being made. Depends on one's interpretation of the fic
โธ A/n: inspired from the movie - the handmaiden, so it has some references to it. I wrote it with a sapphic relationship in mind but as I said above, everything is gender neutral so any type of relationship may be assumed.
Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated.
The flowers in the large garden swayed gently with the pleasant spring breeze. Not too warm, not too cold, the weather was just the perfect balance. The sun peeked from behind the lush green leaves of the tall standing trees that provided a cool shade from the sun.
Two figures walked down the path in the garden, holding each other's hand with a soft grasp while carrying baskets filled with food in the other. The only sound being audible in their surrounding was of the flowers and leaves dancing with the wind, the man-made stream in the garden and the dried leaves that fell on the path, making a crunching sound as the two figures walked on them.
There was no need for words between the two, but the silence didn't bother them as they basked in each other's presence, seemingly not caring about anyone else at that moment, just savouring the moment they had to spend with each other.
Arriving in an open space surrounded by baby's breaths flowers, the two figures settled under a Japanese black pine tree, setting up their baskets as they took a moment to appreciate the scenery in front of them, continuing to hold hands.
Turning to look at each other, soft smiles adorned their faces as they stared at each other with a soft gaze, before taking their hands away as they opened their baskets and ate the snacks they had prepared in comfortable silence as there was no need for any words to converse.
They didn't need anyone else. They had each other, and that was enough for the two. Just the two of them together and alone against the others.
Once again holding each other's hand, the two figures sat closer, resting their heads against each other as they cherished the time that they now had with each other, just gazing in the far distance with nothing to disturb their peace.
With the weather being pleasant, the tree above them providing cool shade, the sun glowing warmly in the sky as the only sound audible was of the leaves bustling with the wind and a few insects, the two figures slowly drifted off from consciousness in the comfort of each other's presence.
The world was long forgotten as the two finally got the chance to sleep peacefully together. They didn't need to worry anymore about anything else; something that seemed impossible in the past.
Because now that they had each other, everything would be fine...
genre: just a little bit of angst, otherwise just pure fluff
warnings: established relationship, contains spoilers
a/n: Here's the requested Namra x Suhyeok fic. I proofread while being half asleep so there could be some minor mistakes here and there.
Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated.
"Wait wait wait hold on-" Daesu interrupted Namra who was talking about her experiences as they all sat around the fire on the rooftop.
"You're meaning to say that you- you've never- been to any amusement park EVER in your whole 18 years of life?"
A small smile adored Namra's face as she nodded slightly, feeling embarrassed. Everyone felt a bit bad about the girl who didn't get to enjoy her life like them.
"Since the beginning, all I was made to do was study continuously so that I could get into SNU and become a prosecutor like the rest of my family," Namra said in a very soft voice looking at the fire in front of her.
"But it's okay, I at least have friends now."
Everyone smiled softly at their class President who was holding hands with Onjo who was sitting beside her. All of them sat quietly enjoying the warmth of the fire, listening to it crackling of the fire.
The peaceful silence was broken by Suhyeok who said, "Once we get out of here, I will definitely take you to an amusement park."
Namra just looked at him and replied softly, "Don't make promises that you won't be able to keep, but I still appreciate the thought."
Suhyeok just chuckled while everything went back to how it was, quiet with just the sounds of fire crackling.
As soon Onjo opened the door to the rooftop, a strong gush of wind caused everyone to shiver slightly as they entered the rooftop of what was once their school.
It had been four months since the whole apocalypse had occurred. Due to Suhyeok not being able to keep his mouth shut, here they were, the survivors, on their ruined school's rooftop where they had seen a small fire lit.
"How can we be sure that it was Namra who must have lit this fire? Could have been any other student or- or it could've been those youtuber kids who like to visit haunted houses and stuff," Minji said.
"No, I am sure it's Namra," Onjo replied staring at the fire in front of them.
"You're here!"
Everyone turned to find the source of the familiar voice, only to find the person they all were looking for, Choi Namra.
"Namra!" Everyone exclaimed in happiness looking at the girl.
"Prez," Suhyeok said as tears started brimming his eyes as he felt overwhelmed by all the emotions as he looked at her.
Oh, how he missed seeing her smile that cheered him up, her voice that comforted him, her presence that gave him hope. How he missed her so dearly, wishing every night to at least have some sort of sign that she was out there alive, doing fine.
And now here she was, smiling at him with the same emotions that he could see in her eyes.
Scoffing playfully, she asked, "I am still your president?"
Both of them stared at each other, temporarily forgetting about the others, almost as if they didn't need words to communicate. It was as if no one else mattered at that moment for them; but unfortunately, this doesn't last long.
"Why can't you come back with us?" Onjo asked Namra breaking the two lovers from their own bubble.
"Because there are others like me here too. I need to help them."
"But we can definitely meet again, now that you all know where to find me," Namra replied with a small smile.
No words were spoken but everyone agreed on what the girl in front of them had said.
"Anyways, they're coming. I must go now. See you all again." Namra said and went to the edge of the building.
Just as she was about to jump, she was stopped by Suhyeok calling out to her.
"Can I take you out on a date tomorrow?"
Namra let out a soft smile as she nodded and jumped from the edge of the building not before shouting a - "You know where to find me."
The next day, Suhyeok was waiting for Namra on the rooftop all dressed up to impress the said girl.
He kept pacing back and forth with anxious thoughts coursing through his mind, clearly being nervous, thinking about whether Namra would like what he had prepared. This action caused him to not notice the said girl's presence beside him.
As soon as he turned, he almost fell down from being surprised by her standing right behind him. He took in deep breaths to calm his racing heartbeat as Namra just chuckled at the clueless boy.
"So shall we go or it's not time yet?" The girl asked.
This snapped the boy out of his daze as he realized what he was there for. So, taking Namra's hand in his, he takes her to the destination.
It took them just an hour to reach their nearest amusement park that was still open today despite all the things that happened back in Hyosan.
Already having purchased tickets earlier that day, they handed them in and entered the park. The Choi girl was impressed looking at what was supposedly the amusement park that she had only seen on tv or phone.
Looking over at the girl beside him, a smile made its way on his face as he saw the girl look around her surrounding with a childlike enthusiasm and eagerness to explore the giant place in front of them.
Gently grabbing her hand, he led her towards different rides.
It was amusing how the girl enjoyed the scary rides of the park the most whereas Suhyeok almost ended up puking his guts out after riding the rollercoaster once while Namra tried to not laugh at him.
After enjoying the rides, they both went to different stalls to play games. While playing both got competitive to see who could score more wins. Sounds of giggling and playful shrieks could be heard from the couple as they got too competitive and began distracting each other to cause the other to fail.
"Hey! Don't block my sight."
''What do you mean? I am doing nothing"
"Who are you trying to fool? Don't you dare think of doing what you're going to do."
"I am not doing anything."
"I can see your hand moving, take it back!"
"I swear I am not gonna do anything."
The night kept on growing as they finally got exhausted by playing for so long. Feeling hungry from all the events, they carried their prizes towards the food stalls.
The heavenly smell of street food items sold there was also a new experience for Namra. Even though she might have had similar food before, nothing compared to the taste of the street food.
Her brown eyes lit up with delight as she tasted every type of food in front of her, enjoying the sweet and savoury flavours of the delicacies that Suhyeok had bought for her.
The way Namra's face adorned her cute smile and stuffed cheeks caused his face and heart to feel warm at the sight in front of him. He wanted to wrap that girl in a blanket and keep her safe and happy from everything in the world.
Not wanting to show his red face, he instead distracted Namra by pinching her cheeks and teasing her. The poor girl just lightly hit his hands away before smiling softly again.
As they both calmed down and looked into each other's eyes, all they could focus on was how much they loved the other. Both of them continued to sit in silence, just gazing at the other with love-filled eyes, just enjoying each other's presence.
"I have to show you something," Suhyeok softly spoke breaking the comfortable silence.
The girl simply tilted her head in confusion.
"We almost did everything here, what else could be left now?'
Suhyeok just motioned her to turn around. Not understanding what he meant, she continued to stare at him as he just chuckled and turned her around, making her face towards the open sky.
"I can't see anything." Namra cutely spoke.
"Count from 10 to 1 for me."
"Why?"
"Just do it."
As soon as the girl reached 1, firecrackers shot up in the sky, brightening the dark night sky. Dozens of firecrackers kept on bursting as the sky glowed from the beautiful sparks produced.
Namra's eyes widened in delight, looking at the different types of crackers. She had seen them before, but none of them looked as pretty as they did now. Maybe it was because she was watching it with someone whom she liked.
Suhyeok just enjoyed looking at the girl beside him, feeling content upon seeing her enjoy this too. He slowly grabbed one of her hands in his, making the girl look at him.
"Can I kiss you?"
His voice came out so soft that Namra almost didn't hear it. Watching at how cute he looked, Namra just shyly nodded.
Both of them slowly leaned in, eyes closing as soon as their lips touched. The kiss was light as a feather, full of emotions felt by both individuals. Just an innocent kiss that meant so much to them, with firecrackers still going on in the background.
As they leaned back again, they stared into each other's eyes with just pure love and adoration for each other.
"I know we've already been over this but I never asked you this. Would you like to be my girlfriend?"
Namra again nodded shyly with a cute smile on her face.
"I'd like that a lot."
Both of them just stared at each other again before deciding to leave as it was almost time for the curfew for Suhyeok.
Standing at the gate of his camp, Namra softly said, "Thank you so much for today. I have never enjoyed myself as much as I did today."
Suhyeok just shook his head saying it was nothing and that all he did was fulfil the promise that he made.
"So, I will you again soon. Right?" Suhyeok asked.
"Of course. We will soon be together, till then we can meet whenever you can come."
A comfortable silence grew around them as they just stood there. Finally, Namra leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek.
"I will see you soon. Take care."
Namra waved and started to walk away. Suhyeok just stood there dumbfounded at what had just happened. Processing everything, he just shook his head and laughed at the small disappearing form of Namra.
Both of them slept late that night, reminiscing their night and thinking about each other.
One day, they'll be free to be together.
They just need to wait till that day, but it was okay, they can patiently wait for that.
the first idea, what if y/n was apart of the main group with gyeongsu, and their reaction to him turning?
it could either be them in an established relationship, or they both like each other and just havenโt made it official ^^
the second idea, is gyeongsuโs reaction to y/n getting infected instead of him?
sorry for kind of angsty prompts but thatโs all i could think of when watching the episodes hahah
Ooh that seems like a nice idea, I will give it a try.
Also for the Namra x Suhyeok request, it is ready but just being edited because I was busy with college reopening again and stuff. It will probably be out in a few hours.
