[bewbin]

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

[2006-honda-civic]

can i fucking help you?

[kaity--did]

Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk

“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”

[kaity--did]

Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?

Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby

Husband: RIVETING!

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️

Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!

[kaity--did]

Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk

All of tumblr collectively at my husband:

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream

Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!

Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued

Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.

[kaity--did]

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND

yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays

Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.

????

[kaity--did]

Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave

Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!

[kaity--did]

FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering

[justplainsalty]

I have follow up questions:

1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?

1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?

[kaity--did]

I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.

Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂

So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂

[kaity--did]

Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.

Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she

1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night

2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day

3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together

I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times

[slowly-spacing-out]

vote senshi tumblr sexyman 2026

-Can cook

-Cares about proper nutrition

-Has decades-long trauma that he avoided addressing until his friends helped him through it

-Cares about the environment/ecosystem he's in, helps keep the dungeon clean and nice

-will make you bread (among other things)

[Gif ID: Senshi from Dungeon Meshi saying: "Give it to me! I'll make you bread!" and then chanting "Bread!" before being hit in the face with the ingredients for bread. End ID

-Once got turned into an elf

-Look at him

[Image ID: Four screenshots of Senshi from the Dungeon Meshi anime. In one, his arms are crossed. In the second, he is crying. In the third, he holds his axe, ready for battle. In the fourth, an imaginary loaf of bread is shown floating above his head, and he is saying "I can make bread!" End ID.]

[voidcreations]

Look at my birthday cake...

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[batbetbitbotbut]

Video summary: Tiktok by @pippabarnes - clips of a person with alopecia applying colourful makeup and other decorations to a bald spot as part of very dramatic looks, narrating now her relationship to her bald spots has developed over time

[fairycosmos]

as a person who is beyond saving i loveee giving life advice. waterlogged corpse at the bottom of the ocean reminding people to swim parallel to the shore to escape a rip current

[judgejudyofficial]

stop letting miserable people on the internet convince you that you must have a concrete, well-constructed opinion on everything that has ever existed.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[judgejudyofficial]

everybody say thank you Marcus Aurelius

[insomniac-arrest]

The Onion Headlines as Ghibli films

Spirited Away

Princess Mononoke

bonus:

Castle in the Sky

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

Howl’s Moving Castle

Kiki’s Delivery Service

Ponyo

The Cat Returns

My Neighbor Totoro 

Porco Rosso

[fibro-memes]

[iero]

OBSESSION (2026) Dir. Curry Barker + trivia

[tall]

[sloppystyle]

Happy Send Me On My Way Sunday

[thunderbottle]

he’s on his way

[polyamorousmood]

It really says something that a lot of monogamous people consider polyamorous and aromantic to be "opposites" but every polyam person I know took one look at aromantics and said "they're just like me for real"

[silosworld]

Poly folks x aro folks in the sense that "alloromantic heterosexual monogamous people view love and sex as an entirely different entity than me, and that makes life kinda strange"

[rincent-van-uggh]

[aromanticofficial]

official aro-polyam solidarity post

[marciaillust]

curious. anyway,

[leebrontide]

Can I offer a reframe of the common "write the shitty first draft" advice? I like that advice a lot but I think the way it's often presented bounces off a lot of people and activates shit that does not help writing happen.

I think of the first draft as an armature.

If I was making a beautiful bronze statue, I would need to make a clay model first. And, depending on the shape, before I even got out my clay I would need to get some good thick wire and create a basic shape for the clay to adhere to, so it doesn't all fall down. Once I have this essential 3D wire frame, I can start building and subtracting and refining.

But if I try to refine on just clay, it won't have enough of a core to hold it up. I'll sculpt a beautiful hand only to have the whole arm fall off and go smush.

The armature isn't the sculpture. It is the frame you build the sculpture around.

The first draft isn't the novel, it's a sort-of-novel-shaped thing that will hold up everything you build and beautify later.

Write the armature draft. Try to make it a good armature, instead of trying to make it a good novel before it's ready.

[sluttynurse]

everyone's afraid of looking busted everyone's afraid of making mistakes everyone's afraid of looking stupid everyone's afraid of embarrassment everyone's afraid of imperfections because of the damn PANOPTICON that is current society and it's fucking STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[sealsdaily]

Today's Seal Is: Scholarly Discussion