crawl backwards out of heaven @lemonmenthol - Tumblr Blog

All computer safety ever for the past 30 odd years: "if you go on the internet — especially if you're under 18 — lie about everything. Lie about your name. Lie about your age. Give as little information away about yourself as you possibly can. Obfuscate, falsify, and omit anything and everything as otherwise They Will Get Your Ass. Actually, avoid it in the first place if you can altogether."

All computer safety(?) since like 2020: "it's imperative we make every 8 year old scan a passport before letting them use their LeapFrog™️. Always-on connectivity required."

willgrahamscock

something that made me sit down and stare at my wall for an hour

just-your-average-cryptid

point of reference from an able-bodied person: standing in one place for an hour kinda makes my feet/legs hurt. longer than that is when it really hits but it takes an hour to get there.

if you are in pain within minutes or seconds, that is not normal. that is a Symptom. poke your doctor into finding out what it is or connect with disabled and chronic pain groups.

if you are in extreme pain, not just "ugh my feet ache" pain but "i am going to pass out" pain, that is not normal. that is a Symptom. poke your doctor into finding out what it is or connect with disabled and chronic pain groups.

I know some people try to rationalize as "well it's not excruciating compared to my baseline" and I am gently reminding you that the baseline is zero. zero is normal. this ^ is not. be kind to yourself.

junequeer

AN HOUR???????

just-your-average-cryptid

"walking for 15 minutes makes the bones in my calves hurt for 2 hours"

buddy... that's the Symptoms...

alpaca-clouds

... Wait, what?

I mean, I can walk just fine, but standing in one spot for like 15 to 20 minutes will leave me in pain for days.

That is... not normal?

willgrahamscock

I love how everyone is still asking hey so my symptoms are actually symptoms? Even if I feel only x amount of pain after x amount of time? BUDDY THE NORM IS FEELING MILD DISCOMFORT AT MOST AFTER STANDING FOR AN HOUR AND THEY RECOVER WITHIN A FEW HOURS TO A DAY

geekyoldlady

So, I talked to my doctor and she suggested weight loss drugs

So that didn’t help

What do I do now?

findingfeather

I mean ideally get a new doctor.

Meanwhile document the actual effect the pain/etc has on your life. Document how it impacts your ability to cook; your ability to clean; your ability to clean yourself; your ability to sleep; your ability to work; document all attempts to be more active and how the pain interferes with them. If you have to do something other than just go stand in the kitchen for ~1hr to cook a meal, that's something to write down; if you have to choose not to have a shower because it'll hurt, write that down. If the pain prevents you from going for a walk, write that down.

Every single time you make a decision about what you're doing based on the pain, you document that; every time you have to endure the pain for a necessary activity which then impacts what ELSE you can do, write that down too, with a direct connection.

(Warning: this will probably be depressing as all fuck and you will probably hate it. You are almost certainly ignoring the impact of pain on you way more than you think you are, and having to face it will feel bad in the short run. Very bad.)

And then you bring it either to your new doctor or if you MUST, to your current doctor, and you say: this is how the pain currently affects my quality of life. This is what I would be doing if I weren't prevented from doing it because of the pain.

Say that you would like to find the reason for this pain and you would like them to order relevant diagnostic tests. If they refuse, or hem and haw, ask them to document clearly in your records that you requested this and both that they refuse and their reasons for refusing.

If you must deal with the same doctor, document the concerns you have with the weight-loss drugs, and ask your doctor to be explicit about why she thinks that these risks are worth something that does not directly address your actual concerns. Ask why this is their first line treatment for the rest of what you've described, and why they are more concerned with pushing an overprescribed treatment than actually investigating the cause of your pain and addressing it appropriately based on an evidence-based diagnosis.

This isn't a guarantee, but it's part of the process.

findingfeather

…. Also yes, I AM serious that you should be able to be in the kitchen for about an hour, on your feet and doing Cooking Things, without pain and without needing Recovery Time, in order to make yourself dinner and if you CAN’T - if that long results in Pain or Dramatic Fatigue or extended recovery - that is a Symptom. A big symptom.

gregorvorbarra

A while ago, I started keeping a pain journal to log my chronic pain and other things, so that I could take it to my doctor’s appointments. I go into detail about it in this post if anyone is interested. My doctor is fantastic and actually listened to me and bothered to investigate my pain, but the pain journal was still a huge help in communicating my health issues clearly. I highly recommend logging your pain (and anything else you feel might be relevant).

Side note: I found the pain journal experience to be really enjoyable because I got to pull out my colorful pens and my cute stationery supplies and make something pretty every day. I decorated my notebook with stickers. I did have to face the way my pain was impacting me, but I got to do it in a fun and colorful way. It helped a lot.

vaspider

When I stopped being able to stand up without pain, it was because there was a slow-growing tumor crushing my spinal cord.

Don't ignore your fucking symptoms.

hollowedskin

For reference, my painling friends, someone without Symptoms can stand in a commercial kitchen for an entire shift of their job, which for chefs can be like 10h. Waitstaff can be walking back and forth their whole shift. Security stands for their whole shift. Hairdressers stand for their whole shift.

Even if we aren't talking about a whole shift, think of the people who are doing the school crossings, the stop/slow guys at roadworks. The nans in the canteen.

My partner prefers to stand when we get to my cousin's at Christmas because he's "sick of sitting down" after the 5h drive.

These are normal levels of mobility. If you can't, that's a symptom. If you can but you'd need a week to recover, that too is a symptom.

odyver

alright I've got to do some quick math to explain attitudes towards AI to my boss.

we're looking to create an AI policy, and when we were talking about this, my boss (older millennial) was genuinely shocked to hear that younger people do not (seem) to view AI positively (a la the recent commencement speakers being booed)

please rb for larger sample size!

Question 1/3

What is your age, and do you feel AI is a net positive or net negative in our lives today?

under 18, AI is a net positive

under 18, AI is a net negative

18-29, AI is a net positive

18-29, AI is a net negative

30-45, AI is a net positive

30-45, AI is a net negative

46-60, AI is a net positive

46-60, AI is a net negative

over 60, AI is a net postive

over 60, AI is a net negative

Remaining time: 6 days 10 hours

odyver

Question 2/3

How often do you visit or interact with museums/archives (whether in person or online)?

Frequently (multiple times per month)

Often (multiple times per year)

Occasionally (a couple times per year)

Rarely (once every couple of years)

Never :(

Remaining time: 6 days 11 hours

odyver

Question 3/3

If you saw a museum was using AI in exhibits, marketing, research, etc., would you be more or less inclined to visit that museum?

under 18, more inclined

under 18, less inclined

18-29, more inclined

18-29, less inclined

30-45, more inclined

30-45, less inclined

46-60, more inclined

46-60, less inclined

over 60, more inclined

over 60, less inclined

Remaining time: 6 days 11 hours

Thank you for helping with this data collection. Please rb for as big a sample as possible!

🫶

cbk1000

As a society, we need to go back to understanding that strangers on the internet are, you know, strangers. I feel lately that I'm seeing a rise in 'An author I love blocked me because they took my comment the wrong way' posts on the ao3 subreddit, and then the comment is them calling the author a fucking bitch or something like that.

Don't do this. Tone doesn't translate well in text, and if you don't have a rapport with that author, they are not going to interpret, 'You're a fucking bitch' as, 'Author I hate you for being so talented and making me feel so keenly.' They're going to interpret it as you being an asshole. You can shit talk with your friends because you have an established relationship with them and can distinguish between playful banter and genuine anger. You do not have this with a stranger, no matter how much you like their fics. You will have a much more pleasant time in fandom and not get cockblocked from interacting with your favorite writers if you remember this.

this-is-trans-joy

I don’t know if this is an obvious take or a hot take, but I think people need to start re-framing feminism as the fight for body autonomy as opposed to whatever this second wave revival gender essentialist bullshit we have going on right now. Once you reframe it in this way, it’s easier to understand intersectionality and why cis women are not the only people who need feminism. The lack of body autonomy effects cis women, trans people, intersex people, disabled people, poc, homeless people, sex workers, etc. and your feminism needs to include and prioritise all of these groups of people (which will include men btw) because feminism is about autonomy, not about establishing a matriarchy. Body autonomy is the biggest threat to the patriarchy, both with reproductive rights, LGBTQ+ rights, and even the right to not be drafted into military services. Once body autonomy is established for everyone, the patriarchy no longer has a leg to stand on.

And body autonomy does include things that you don’t personally like either. I was prompted to write this post after a series of bad takes from progressives, but one of them was re-hashing the Sabrina Carpenter album cover drama with “I don’t think it’s conservative of me to think that the album cover is a bad look when we’ve seen images of women being abused in this way” because I do actually think you’ve failed to understand feminism by projecting your morals onto a woman who was consensually expressing her own autonomy just because she expressed it in a way that you didn’t like or that made you uncomfortable.

Body autonomy also means unhealthy choices. Body autonomy also means regret rates. Body autonomy also means freedom of sexuality. Body autonomy also means mutilation. If you believe body autonomy has limitations and exceptions, then your feminism is most likely surface level.

TERFs are some of the biggest opponents to body autonomy, and if you find yourself thinking “oh people can do whatever they want with their bodies as long as it doesn’t harm them or make others uncomfortable” then you are far more susceptible to TERF propaganda than you think.

this-is-trans-joy

ooooh the radfems are BIG mad about this one

special-agent-dale-gooper

uncle-beanbag-mojave

We would fully accept any Japanese buckaroo

theconstitutionisgayculture

Foreigners will never understand how someone like Rawhide Kobayashi would immediately become a beloved local fixture in whatever small American town he ended up in.

brazenautomaton

every single time someone pulls the "How would you AMERICANS like it if someone came to AMERICA and" reversal, the answer is always "we'd fucking love it"

not-so-innocent-bi-sander

@kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd

Your tags summed up the exact feeling I had about this

tikkunolamorgtfo

I just Googled the Swedish-Japanese guy in the OP, and according to this interview, his Japanese name was given to him by the master gardener he was apprenticed under:

“The family name ‘Murasame’ was given to me by my master. The given name ‘Tatsumasa’ is a combination of ‘dragon’ (tatsu), the [zodiac] year when I was born, and one character from my master’s name,” says Murasame."

So I think maybe it's less like naming yourself 'Brandon McFreedom' and more like moving to the states to work under a veteran car mechanic named Bud McLean, and then having him turn to you after a few years on the job, and say "Son, it's time for you to become an American so you can open up your shop. And when that day comes, I think the world should know you by a new name: McLeo GM Corvette."

teaboot

Named by his superior by conventions one would apply to a super chill stray cat

quasi-normalcy

I've reached the point where cynicism is a major turn-off for me. You're not smarter than idealists, and you're not helping.

quasi-normalcy

Funny that the stereotypical cynic is an idealist who aged out of it. In my experience, the reverse is true. I was an extreme cynic as a teenager and then I noticed how profoundly limiting it was, and also that "cynics are cool and smart" was a message that was being constantly reinforced by corporate media for some reason.

quasi-normalcy

#yes! cynicism reads as very juvenile to me#and yes prev often stemming from teen pain

Yeah, like I see black-pilled people on here and my default reaction isn't "oh, these must be world-weary old warriors who've lost their faith in humanity", it's "these people are in their 20s and need a hobby"

quasi-normalcy

I also think that the present era has proven that authoritarian leaders don't actually want a population of wide-eyed idealists, they want a population of jaded assholes who are convinced that everyone is lying, any resistance is either a scam or doomed to failure, and nothing can ever get better.

teathattast

melonflavored

Can we still let our swag blossom in 2026?

We have to try.... We have to just try🌼

nezu-mi

okay *biggest sigh ever recorded*

thomasmomwell

there should be a special heart button you can press that's just for when your friend's tags are really good

thehmn

One of the most heartwarming things I’ve ever heard a dog trainer say “A pushy pet who makes small demands and communicates their needs to you is a safe pet. It means they trust you and aren’t afraid of your reaction if they misbehave and push your buttons a little”

nora-yoko

veliseraptor

The great critic Barbara McClay has written about the "politics creep" in every corner of human life, though really of bourgeois Anglophone human life, where every act from reading a novel to lighting a scented candle can be justified - and in fact, self-consciously needs to be justified in advance - as a bold act of resistance. Pretending that self-care is a brave political act detracts from actual political acts, and it sucks the life out of life itself: turning every moment into a performance for an audience, for an imagined crowd of other people on social media. This is other people not as fellow complicated human beings, but as fearful object, whose inner lives are imaginable only insofar as they might be watching and comparing and judging us for whether we've done enough, whether we're wasting our time. And books and movies and TV shows and every other form of fiction will always be, to some extent, a waste of time, as having friends will be a waste of time, as being in love is a waste of time, as every possible action or thought you may have could be considered a waste of time if every second of your life has to prove its value, and has to get a job.

from Dangerous Fictions: The Fear of Fantasy and the Invention of Reality by Lyta Gold