queen frank

maad city lover

[crxxxpz]

If you’d kiss me you’re legally required to tell me btw.

[neenarchive]

no i don't want you to redirect me to your app i want to look at recipe

[neenarchive]

i am not going to a secondary location with you one of us dies here

[shadow-banned-the-hedgehog]

[classycookiexo]

[capricorn-born]

Oddly specific. Got a deposit for 6,837 today

[weaselle]

fuck it, i never ever do those “reblog for X, this one really works!” posts, but this one doesn’t have any of that BS, this is just straight up wishing us good things; and then the comment doesn’t even say any of that either. Zero claims on this post, all positive vibes

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[vmohlere]

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[caruliaa]

maybe cain wldnt have killed abel if they had video games to healthily channel the violence between siblings. unfortunately back then the only smash brothers they had was smash brothers head in with a rock

[boycritter]

this sucks so bad i need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] put on the best talent show this towns ever seen

[commandtower-solring-go]

Get you a girl who speaks in parentheses. Get you a girl who includes information in a sentence that isn't necessary but adds additional context or commentary.

[angelslant]

when i have a crush i dont kick my feet or twirl my hair instead i am in my kitchen at 3am pacing in circles with my hands clasped behind my back like a middle-aged divorced detective haunted by a cold case he just cant crack

[flowerbleedme]

Effeminate dentist: You need to brush more on your gums-- hold on why am I "effeminate?" What? I'm literally just a normal dentist. A masculine one, even.

Me: (struggling to speak through the dentist's fingers) youw weren't shupposhed to shee that

[prisonhannibal]

it’s kinda fucked up that you’re only an age for a year. I didn’t know how to be 23 yet, let me try again

[ovur]

Life is all about being really scared and wasting your youth

[lightningbuster]

Dog toy plushies have fundamentally different souls than that of regular plushies. Unlike regular plushies, which are content with just existing (and just go to regular heaven when they get destroyed and don’t mind being resurrected), dog toys seek Valhalla. This is why you don’t need to feel bad when your dog/cat/especially strong bird rips it to shreds, because this was the warriors death they were seeking all their life

[terror-billie]

it's a weird emotion when somebody goes "doesn't this just shake you to your core and rewrite your dna and change who you are as a person" and your honest experience of it was that it was ok

[fury-brand]

"Fuck I'm going to get a bad grade in friendship media resonance"

[erisolkat]

the humble "like" is oft mocked despite what it does for us. "like, three people" is a vastly different statement from "three people". "and i was like 'what the fuck'" is vastly different from "and i said 'what the fuck'". i love you "like" and anyone who says you make people sound stupid will be killed on sight

[cannibalchicken]

[37q]

my job in the leftist commune is babybel unwrapper and everyone wants to fuck me

[continent-of-wild-endeavor]