tiger lily

private rp

[lilytigers]

“She was fierce, to be sure, but she had a girl's heart, after all.”

( x )

Name: Tiger Lily Delisle Nicknames: N/A Age: 25 (immortal) Birthday: July 2, 1997 Height: 5′5” Sexuality: Queer Occupation: Legislative assistant

[panforever]

“It doesn’t all have to be existential dread.” -@lilytigers

“I know that,” Peter answered almost too quickly, defensively. Of course he was being stubborn. His legs were crisscrossed, though his body was partially hovering above the grass as they watched the sunset. Tiger Lily was always the person he went to when he struggled with his immortality, something he never really discussed with anyone else. She could relate more than anyone else could, and he didn’t fear receiving her judgment; no matter what, he could rely on their friendship that it wouldn’t change. They were completely transparent with one another. After a moment’s pause, Peter huffed a sigh. “It's just.. ever since New Year's, everything’s been different.” Things were changing, and they would continue changing, changing, changing… It was exactly what he’d been trying to avoid since turning twenty-five. “It sucks.”

[lilytigers]

Peter’s confession prompted Tiger Lily to tear her eyes from the sunset and look at his face instead. All she found in his expression was exactly what she expected, so she returned her gaze to the sky, her posture almost a mirror of his except that she was sitting in the grass while he floated above it. Privately, she thought he was afraid, and covering that fear with frustration—and her advising him to confront his real emotions would only make him more defensive so she wouldn’t. It was enough that he was willing to be this open about how he felt; she wasn’t going to call him a coward for it. As much as they were the same, they were different. Where Tiger Lily had her father and her community, Peter was more alone in his immortality, sharing that facet of their being with only her. With things changing amongst his found family, it was natural for him to worry about the future. But then that was something he would have to deal with for the rest of his existence.

Whether he was seeking advice or comfort after his explanation, all she could offer was, “Change is the only thing that stays the same. You’ll come to terms with that the longer you live. I know that doesn’t make it easy, but…you don’t have to make it harder on yourself.” And what she meant by that was, “Being upset about it won’t fix it. It only makes you upset.” He should focus on trying to enjoy the time he still had left with his friends, rather than wish to keep them from growing and moving on with their natural lifespans.

[othrdarlinboyy]

At her words that was meant to comfort Michael, he found himself sighing at instead. He understood where she was coming from about how he still had time. There was plenty of time within his life for him to explore and figure out things, and he completely knew that. However, it wasn’t just the fact that he felt like he didn’t have much time left to do anything, no— what had Michael so bothered was how among his peers, he was the one currently living at the short end of it. “I know,” the brunette began, wanting to let Tiger Lily know that he was listening to her and that he even got what she was saying to him, “I know I have so much time left, and I wish I could be content in knowing that there is no need for me to rush but— I still can’t help but think that I’m falling behind.” Michael confessed, once again letting out a sigh as he did so. What did he mean by that? He meant that he was comparing himself to others, and not just a random select, but rather, it was the comparison to his own siblings is what had the youngest Darling feeling so bothered by himself. “That others are not even that much older than me, yet it seems like they’re all living completely different lives than the one we grow up on; more developed and thought out kind of lives, whereas with me?…..” He didn’t even elaborate, tiredness over all insecure feelings he’s been holding onto recently prominent within his eyes. “I just don’t want to be left behind, you know?” 

[lilytigers]

Tiger Lily took a moment to absorb Michael’s words. wanting to fully understand how he was feeling before trying to respond to it. This was perhaps a more serious conversation than she was equipped to handle, as the youngest Darling was truly distressed about the competition he thought he was subject to. Tiger Lily had no siblings herself, but she had been raised in a close-knit community with others her age and understood the nature of comparison. She was never enough like her peers to satisfy popular expectation. And even she knew that this race Michael imagined in his mind didn’t really exist. His brothers and sister weren’t leaving him behind just because they were forging ahead—they were carving their paths. He could choose to follow any one of them, or he could choose to make his own. The only way he wasn’t moving forward was if he let himself get trapped by indecision and stood in place without taking any path. 

“Michael, your friends and family will never leave you behind,” she said, assuring him of that fact first and foremost. But she wanted to know what would make him happy in this situation. “Are you saying this because you want to catch up to where they are in their…more developed and thought-out lives,” she quoted him, “or because you don’t want anything to change? Would you have them all stay the same until you’re ready to move on?” If it was the former, all it would take to fix his angst was to start planning what he wanted for his own future, and figuring out what would help him lead a more fulfilling and interesting life. If it was the latter, it was a different kind of introspective work he would need to do to let go of the past he was clinging onto.

[lilytigers]

@othrdarlinboyy said: “Sometimes I feel like I’ll never have it together.”

“You’re still so young.” Those were words Tiger Lily knew Michael would once have dreaded coming from her—back when he was a kid with a hopeless crush on an older girl—but since he had long grown out of that feeling, it felt safe to say without possibly hurting him. In fact, it was the one thing to say that could hope to provide comfort against his concerns now. “You don’t have to have it all together now, and you don’t even have to be on track to getting it together for a while yet,” she advised with a knowing smile. She had all the time in the world. Her opinion might mean less to someone who didn’t. But even she could tell that twenty-one was too young to be facing existential dread, and she was still twenty-five right now for the first time. This was the oldest she had ever been, and would be for the rest of her life. Michael might have hit his quarter-life crisis, but there was still so much ahead for him that he at least shouldn't worry about running out of time to find himself and what he was meant to be doing in life. "Your twenties are for trying different things and seeing what calls to you; I promise, nobody expects you to have the rest of your life figured out by the time you can drink." She modified that statement: "Nobody wise."