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Left this site because of the censorship
Back for memes bye
Highly doubt anyone remembers me but I'm not dead and I came here for meMes if anyone wants to follow my new Tumblr when I make it
Why Iâve stopped writing.
Hi guys. I know no one follows me, but there are a few people who care here.Â
First of all...I am a product of a broken family. Iâm a child of divorce.
Iâm a survivor of abuse by my own âparents.â
In December I was still working on my stories. Something went down, and my relationship with my fiance turned sour. We split. We were still in love, but we just couldnât do it anymore. I donât know what went wrong. My friend from Michigan came to Indiana to stay a few days because shit hit the fan where he was living. My fiance had the wrong idea and took off. My child was being watched by my abusive parents - who gained my trust over 2 years and fooled me into thinking they finally had compassion and empathy - because I needed to get my head straight. I had to go to the hospital. Michigan friend, Myles, stayed because I couldnât be alone. My head was not on straight. I was depressed and anxious and it was eating me alive. I was disassociating constantly. I was tricked into signing a guardianship paper before I went to inpatient.
It was the biggest mistake of my life. I worked upwards of 50 hours at a factory every day and went in early. I started having a relationship with Myles. My parents stopped letting me see my son for 3 months because of something my ex said that I had nothing to do with. That made me worse. They started stalking me. I had an infection at one point that went septic. I was dying and they would not bring my 1 year old to see me. If I wouldâve died, I wouldnât have been able to say goodbye to my boy.
I moved 2 hours away from him. They werenât letting me see him and it was killing me, and the stalking got to me, my supervisor at the factory screamed at me for an entire shift for using the restroom after a kidney infection almost killed me. It was too much. I packed some clothes and my grandfather took me and Myles and my pets to his place. He has dementia, but heâs in denial. He does take his meds however, so heâs okay. Iâm leaving some important and terrifying details out, but I donât want to make anyone panic.
My ex and I are still best friends. Iâve come together with him, his family, my friends, and my biological family (I was adopted), and a few people in my stepmoms family for my son.
We found out they were trying to gain custody so my stepsister could raise him. My ex got the baby back after my lawyer told my parents they did not want me to take the stand, since I was abused by them and I have witnesses. She harassed me after my ex gained custody. I donât have custody yet because the GAL for our case is worried about my mental health. My âparentsâ have made a case that Iâm mentally unstable. No. I have anxiety, major depression, ADHD, and I am severely traumatized - the word PTSD has been used but I feel guilty taking it because my bio mom keeps telling me some people have it worse. Iâve shut her, my adoptive father, and my stepmother out of my life. They sabotaged my relationship with my little sister (18) with lies.Â
But Iâm in therapy now. Iâm improving. Iâm getting the GAL in here if I can because I have all the boxes checked for her requirements. Iâm ready. Iâve been ready for my son for 10 months. I havenât slept next to him since Christmas. I never got to wean him off of breastfeeding, he was 15 months when they took him.
I have hope. Iâm pregnant again. Iâm not kidding. Iâm surrounded by love and compassion. I have a relationship with my biological father. I get to see my son. I get to play with him and put him to bed at his dadâs. Iâm still a bit of a mess because this year has been extremely hard, but Iâm gonna be okay soon.
Once things settle Iâll get back into my favorite hobby. I miss it so much. Iâve been itching to write. And as a coping mechanism, Iâm probably going to have my Deacon/Cait/Julien story reflect real things that have happened in my life, because the emotions Iâve felt are...worthy of being written.Â
Iâm sorry Iâm rambling again lol. I have to wrap this up because I have therapy in 40 minutes. Take care yâall, Iâm gonna come back and write at about 9 pm.Â
Including pics so you know Iâm not bullshitting and so you know Iâm alive.
Sketchdump for the ghoul boyfriend, with ink and white conte.
âNever thought a reporter could consider themselves a success until someoneâd threatened their life. Me? Iâm very successful.â
Piper Wright, Fallout 4 (2015)
Write while tired, they said.
It will help your productivity, they said.
Reblog this if you support other fanfic writers and donât let stats jealousy dictate how you treat them
Because through-the-roof stats isnât the ultimate purpose to uploading our fanfics on AO3, and comparing ourselves to each other only poisons our minds and stifles our creativity. Letâs instead revel in our successes as they come, and take them as further encouragement.
my sole survivor cosplay from acen 2019! Iâll probably redo this I waited till the last minute and didnât have enough time to perfect the âcute but dirtyâ look lmao. đ
photos: sunpeachphotography (edited by me)
This game is extraordinaryÂ