25 Years of Wisdom

Girl, 25, procrastinator, author, gamer, awesome. Pharmacist. Brit. Generally inactive. Both irl and on here.

[aeonlamb]

whats a gender neutral word you could use for your spouse? wusband?? hife?? wifesband?!?!?

[aeonlamb]

i may be stupid

[vapid-gay]

This is the text version of looking for your glasses when they are on your head

[apatheticskeleton]

i can NOT stop thinking about when c.s. lewis introduced a character by saying “his name, unfortunately, was Eustace Scrubb” like BRUH no need to do him dirty like that 😭😭 you GAVE him that name. tf

[jedi-valjean]

You forgot he immediately followed it with “and he almost deserved it.”

[lioncalledparsley]

#clive staples you are throwing bricks in glass houses 

[fesenmoon]

do the people who go to remy’s bistro at the end of ratatouille ever start. noticing shit

[jilf]

Bimbo and Himbo aren't gender locked

[jilf]

Female himbos:

Male bimbos:

[thorodinsson]

Fortunately, I am mighty!

[everywhichship]

I love him

[dankmemeuniversity]

[omghotmemes]

He is speaking the language of the gods.

[starfleetacademy]

Desire paths are just the best human invention because cities will spend millions on sidewalks and yet. Our little foraging brains will think ‘too far cut thru grass for food’ and others will be like ‘other human have good idea. I follow’ until there’s a beaten path when there’s perfectly acceptable sidewalks to either side

[starfleetacademy]

For example

[solitairians]

these are called “olifantenpaadjes” in dutch (little elephant paths) (remember this for later it’s important) and there’s a whole facebook page dedicated to it, where people can send in pictures of these “elephant paths” all across the country and they get rated with stars.

apparently, a city renovated its park, and ended up putting a tree branch over a beloved path:

of course, this meant the path had become unusable, which is an utter tragedy, so an anonymous citizen did the rational thing and got up in the middle of the night, went to the park, and cut the branch in half using a chainsaw. 

so like.. this citizen should probably get arrested for destruction of public property right??? nah. the city just thought it was funny and even made a joke about it when the renovated park got-re opened. the only thing to come out of it was this photo, posted by a local news site:

and that’s the story of how dutch people really, really, really love their little elephant paths.

[alejandr-oh]

[coolerhope]

Pokemon with Synchronize when they get poisoned:

[stantler]

that post about gym leaders tweeting that rock and ground are the same type is funny but do you think this has ever been like a point of contention for biologists in the pokemon world. like the way the fairy type wasn’t discovered until recent years and was misclassified as normal type for most of history. do you think professors in the pokemon universe argue over whether certain pokemon have been mistyped or if certain types may actually not exist at all

[stantler]

professor sycamore when his hypothesis on the 18th type was confirmed after his findings were repeatedly rejected and laughed at by the heads of the kalos institute of pokebiology for over a decade

[senatortedcruz]

[comic-book-fan-us]

[never-a-good-thing-to-have-deac]

Wait… Isn’t Ed Balls day coming up? ED BALLS DAY, I HAVE TO GET READY TO CELEBRATE 

[thewalrusfrompingu]

What’s Ed Balls day?

[never-a-good-thing-to-have-deac]

Omg, okay explanation time. 

On the 28th of April, 2011, Ed Balls got a Twitter account. He decided (as most people under the spotlight do) to attempted to look up his own name. However, all he did was tweet “Ed Balls”. This, for some reason, got retweeted by THOUSANDS of people. On a global scale. And because he didn’t know you could delete a tweet it stayed. Every year since then,the 28th of April is Ed Balls day. 

This is the infamous tweet

and here are some gems to celebrate that have followed the years, including last year where they framed the tweet and got him to sign it for charity

There are also LOADS MORE in this article from the Telegraph

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/general-election-2015/11566593/Ed-Balls-Day-fourth-anniversary-of-that-tweet.html 

[nunyabizni]

IT’S ALMOST HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bogleech]

man I wish the original movie was more like this disney cruise line stage musical, who knew fucking Woody Toy Story actually had the biggest banger of a threatening villain-esque disney song?!

[bogleech]

Musical Woody shrinks that wretched boy with his haunted doll witchcraft and we never see him undo it

[fuckyeahbiguys]

[fuckyeahbiguys]

We’ve waited a year to reblog this. Happy Bread Anniversary!

Because it’s important to celebrate the little victories in life. 

[vinceaddams]

12 days left until the breadiversary, we’d better make sure we have the ingredients on hand!

[purrpleberrie]

It’s today!

[vinceaddams]

It’s today!!

[hymnsofheresy]

i was with my mother’s family and they were talking to me about my religious studies major. my great aunt asked me what the definition of hell was, and i responded “well i suppose it depends on who you ask.” and nearly all the protestants in the group decided that hell was “the absence of god” which i suppose is a fair answer, albeit not a universal one. my cousin’s wife was playing with her 3-year-old daughter and she says “well mommy says that hell is a mcdonald’s playplace” asdfghjhgfd

[hymnsofheresy]

this 3-year-old girl is so fucking hilarious. her mothers have signed her up for a toddler yoga class, and so she has adopted a very unique language. this child also has an imaginary friend named “mom” which is, in her mind, the boss of her two mothers. for example, my cousin’s wife explained to me how her daughter got mad at them one time. the little girl situated herself in the corner of her crib, pretended to type on a cell phone and said  “im writing an email to mom right now and telling her how bad you two are. namaste.”

[hymnsofheresy]

the family’s Big Theory about “Mom” is that both my cousin and her wife are referred to as “Mommy” and “Mama.” The nickname “Mom” is not used in the house because it would just be confusing. However, when interacting with the world, people tell their daughter that they will “tell her mom” if she is doing something wrong. so this child automatically assumes there is this greater “Mom” figure that is responsible for distributing universal justice. 

[whitepeopletwitter]

[gingersofficial]

[candiikismet]

Life path unlocked. He’s a scientist now.

[prolifeproliberty]

If your dad is telling you in great detail about something he’s passionate about, you’re going to be hooked even if you don’t understand a word.

[by-grace-of-god]

He tells us more…

So now I have to deliver a quiet lecture on the Standard Model every night. He loves lists of things, like all the streets home from daycare, or the train stations between here and Central, so he loves hearing the list of leptons and quarks and bosons.

Anyway, I made this poster for him, based on the CPEP ones we used to have at uni . 

Alas I ran out of room for antimatter, colour charge and confinement, but hey, maybe there can be a second poster later.

It’s funny though — on the surface of it, it seems like it must be far too advanced for a 3yo. But when you think about it, quarks and leptons are no more or less real to him than, say, dinosaurs or planets, and he loves those too. And he recognises the letters on the particles.

I am absolutely overwhelmed by the kind and sweet things people are saying about this, thanks everyone ❤️

Addendum: he has really grasped onto the “everything is made of atoms” part of this, so tonight he listed just about every object he could think of and asked if it was made of atoms.

“And my bed?” Yes, and your bed. “And that wall?” Yep. “And the armchair?” Yes, the armchair too. … … “And… the book case?” Y—

“And my home?” Yep, the whole apartment block. “And your home? Oh wait, your home is my home.” Haha, it is. … … “But is it made of atoms?” Yep. “And… [best friend]’s home?” Yes, it is. And [other friend]’s home, and [third friend]’s home.

“Is [yet another friend]’s home?”

Update from the other night:

“Is my… is… [extremely long pause] is my atoms poster made up of atoms?” —Yes! Yes it is.

I have never heard such a contemplative silence. I think the next poster will have to be on the philosophy of referential language.

Update from this morning: after listing everything in sight (mummy? daddy? fridge? milk? cereal? table? etc.) he asks “is [baby sister] made up of atoms?”

yep!

*runs over to her on the floor* *puts face up real close to hers* “HI! YOU’RE MADE UP OF LOTS OF ATOMS! DID YOU KNOW?”