NOW do you remember? who you are? what you were meant to do?
private + selective venom snake of metal gear solid. slightly canon divergent. loved by olive.
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@livinglie
NOW do you remember? who you are? what you were meant to do?
private + selective venom snake of metal gear solid. slightly canon divergent. loved by olive.
rules | wiki | dossier | verses
blogroll: @warmongered / @storyblessed / @autexousiius
which subtle way of saying "i love you" are you?
you wear your heart on your sleeve. you're probably the first to tell a person you love them in an unsubtle way -- because you love them, and they deserve to know it! maybe you're not entirely open about what you feel all the time (it depends on the situation and the person you're with) but you're generally comfortable around emotions. your own and others' -- and you'll make sure to encourage the people you love to be honest about how they feel, too. you'll check in with them to make sure they're okay, and you know your closed-off loved ones well enough to check in with them again when they've assured you that yes, they're fine, don't worry. because guess what? you'll happily worry about them, and they'll get it in the end. your love is the healing type; you're patching up scars you might not even know exist.
tagged by: @keepslore tagging: anyone who wants to do this :]
tumblr making me turn on mature content just to look at oomf's beautiful bbeva baby
the agency of it all
memes for muses who just would really benefit from being afforded self-determination just a little more often. feel free to swap out pronouns or words to make it fit your muse better!
"Is this what you want?"
"If you don't want to be here, we can leave."
"I need to touch you to wrap it up, is that okay?"
"Did they ask if they could publish it?"
"They should have asked first."
"I want your enthusiastic consent."
"It's not what you wanted. Thank you for stopping me."
"It's your experience. You're the expert, I'm just along for the ride."
"What are some of the things I've done before that helped?"
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"I get I'm not, like, your best friend. But I'm here if you want me."
"Do you want to get some sleep?"
"If you tell me about it I want it to be on your terms."
"Sure I know what they said, but they're not you. What do you want me to know about it?"
"Was there ever a time where it didn't... hurt as much?"
"Actually, no, you don't. You don't 'owe me' the truth."
"I want to know about it because I want to know about you. But never in a way that hurts you."
"You get... quiet when I do it. I want to be sure it isn't costing you something."
"I know you care about me. You don't have to 'prove' it."
"You're allowed to keep some secrets."
"Your healthcare isn't anybody else's business."
"Of course I didn't tell them. It's your story."
"I'll lie to them if you ask me to."
"I know first aid(/other medical knowledge), is it okay if I take a look?"
@morisenatha || from here
wrasse primarily doesn't understand what lavellan is doing out in the field in the first place. she may have the schooling and the observational skills that suit a scout, but she does not have the training. it takes far more than some shooting range practice and a bit of sparring to make a soldier. the other civilians they've picked up earn their keep on base. safe.
it is not necessarily her job to tend to this wound. she is a field medic. she is snake's field medic, more specifically. though her job will see her deploying with higher ranked soldiers or on riskier missions, she is sure to be available whenever big boss is going on a mission of his own. so lavellan should have been passed off to the medical staff on base. but wrasse had intercepted the typical proceedings when the helicopter arrived.
the medics had set the leg for the most partâshe's making sure it was done correctly and getting lavellan fitted with the splint she'll need for this to set properly. her focus is intense, so much so that she doesn't realize the other woman is crying until the movement of her body impedes wrasse's progress.
her head snaps up to ask her to sit still, please, but the words die on her lips as she hears the sob wrench its way out of lavellan- therith. she pauses, about to offer her something a bit stronger for the pain, but it quickly becomes apparent that pain is not the issue.
"don't apologize," she says. it's matter-of-fact in its delivery, but not harsh. wrasse's bedside manner has never been something she's worried about. soldiers take what they are given, rarely in a position to complain as they're loaded into the rescue helicopter. but battlefield medic is at war with something else, here: the fact that she likes therith an awful lot.
she takes one hand off of the splint to pass her a box of tissues. they're good to keep around. "listen. dwelling on this too much won't save the mission, won't unbreak your leg. no one died, your team picked up some good intel. that's better than some can say. know what you did wrong, think about how to not do it again. your pain level still okay?"
SIMPLE SHIPPING MEME!!
Send đ if you would like to explore a PLATONIC relationship between our muses!
Send đ if you would like to explore a FAMILIAL relationship between our muses!
Send â€ïž if you would like to explore a ROMANTIC relationship between our muses!
Send đ if you would like to explore a SEXUAL relationship between our muses!
Send đ„ if you would like to explore a ANTAGONISTIC relationship between our muses!
Send â for a different dynamic - and tell me more about it!
@lgaku || from here
it would be nice to say it gets easier with time. wrasse wishes she could say it gets easier with time. but it's not like killing. that's threat, adrenaline, defense. saving a lifeâthere's nothing like it. so that means there's also nothing like failing. and maybe with some distance from the situation she'll remember that it's good that her chest hurts this badly when she loses someone. it ensures she won't ever take it for granted.
but for the time being she's just angry. with herself, not crane. she might not have his training, but she's seen enough death to know when someone is on the brink of it. still. she's also seen crane work miracles. perhaps it was naive to wish for one.
she lets her fist connect with the wall, though not at full strength. just enough to give her a jolt. just enough to center her. she closes her eyes and grits her teeth so tight that her jaw starts to ache.
there's a million what ifs running through her head. what if i'd gotten there faster. what if they'd been hit just a bit to the left. what if we'd gotten here sooner. what if they'd lost just a bit less blood. she doesn't put voice to any of them. crane doesn't need to hear it. he looks composedâshe wonders what he does to cope with all this. they don't lose many at MSF, but each one twists like a knife.
"...thank you. for saying that. and for all you did." a pause, a hand pushing sweat-limp hair out of her face. she has a question, one that is trying to crawl out of her even as she tries to keep it down. she has confidence in her own abilities but... crane is a doctor.
"is there- did you notice anything i could have done differently? i need to know. for the next." there would be a next time. there would always be a next time.
PROMPTS FOR ANGSTY CONVERSATIONS * Â a collection of things you never want to hear
you never told me that. i can't believe you never told me.
what difference does it make?
no, no, no, don't leave me! please!
i failed you. is that what you want me to say?
was it all a lie? all this time?
so... when do you leave? what time? so i can be ready.
why did it take you so long to tell me? how long have you been holding this in?
i was wrong.
is this it? is this all there is?
at least give me one last dance.
all the exits are blocked. we're trapped.
there's too much blood.
you're the worst person i've ever met.
you're just as broken as i am.
i really thought we could work things out.
so stupid of me to think you actually cared.
you're just going to carry on and pretend like everything's fine when it's not fine.
go on without me. i can handle this.
don't tell me i'm too late.
i told you to leave me alone.
there's no use in trying anymore. it's over.
i should have known. i should have known all along.
i need you to be honest with me. tell me the truth. i deserve the truth.
you failed me.
i wish i never met you.
it's over. go home.
i feel something broken inside me. you can't fix it. no one can.
just take some deep breaths. in and out. you're gonna be fine.
you used to be better than this.
there's no way out.
what the hell was that for?
if you stay here, you'll die. do you understand?
how dare you speak to me like that!
am i too late?
you have to believe me. i didn't mean for this to happen.
i used to think you were perfect. i guess i was wrong.
so this is how it ends? just like that?
we're running out of time.
when were you going to tell me the truth?
how long has it been since we spoke? feels like years.
when did this start? how long has this been going on?
you never really loved me. it was all fake.
who was that? why were they here? why did you let them in?
i came as fast as i could.
what the hell did you think would happen?
can i even trust you?
i don't know who i am anymore.
i can't lose you again.
you are my biggest regret.
what good will it do?
just keep pressure on the wound, okay?
how could you do this to me?
i said get out! get out of here!
i'm never speaking to you again.
i tried to stop it!
you're so fucking stupid.
it's never been okay.
good riddance.
get out of here! i'll handle this!
i can't believe you. i can't believe you did this to me.
you were a good person once. i looked up to you.
i never should have listened to you. i'm such a fool.
don't lie to me! i know when you're lying!
why the hell did you do that?
i've never been wanted. not really. not by anyone.
i never loved you.
i've been dealing with this my whole life.
it was all a lie.
you forgot my birthday.
i'm a monster.
you actually believed that shit?
you think i would just stick around and let you treat me like that?
are you actually leaving?
can i kiss you one last time?
i can't believe i gave up my life for you. i gave up everything for you.
i can't lose you, too!
for what it's worth, there's no one i would rather fight alongside.
hang on for me, all right? don't leave me. please don't go.
i deserve better than this. i deserve better than you.
good! get out of here! i didn't want you here anyway!
i made it up as i went along.
things are going to get worse before they get better.
i don't think we're getting out of this alive.
we're not gonna make it.
get the fuck out of my face.
i don't think i'm meant to be loved.
hey sorry i'm late i wandered into a liminal space
what do you mean i've been missing for 10 years
they've caught him like a hunter chasing a jackal down a narrow run, and god, does it sour eliab. thrust into a violent world against his will the day he'd carved clean of his mother's womb, resentful for existing--he'd vowed in his adolescent mind to never be the pawn of adults ever again, to grasp his future in both hands and carve out his destiny.
yet, here he was, interred on an oil rig because..
well, that was just it. because why? it wasn't as if snake and his cohorts were exactly better men than him, nor did they possess a moral obligation toward supplanting his free rein. after all, he was no son of his, and he doubted he made time for him for the fun of it.
eli's lip pulls up around a sharp canine, freshly adult. the audacity of his supposed father was unbelievable: as if he hadn't a clue where the animosity would stem from, what would induce such a fervid rage, as if... the sound that punches out of the youth is unfriendly and derisive. ' back off. ' his thumb instinctually flies to where he would normally keep his hunting knife, pinching the empty space. damn. still, he takes a deliberate step back; it's all defensive muscle memory, like a dog backed into a corner. ' keep your bloody hands away from me. if another one of your men get chummy with me, i'm taking a fucking hand off. '
war and combat made a foul mouth of a child; if he'd anywhere else, it would've been in kikongo instead of accented english. his teeth grind together, and eliab's spine curls just slightly, shoulders hiked. ' i didn't.. i didn't ask for any of this! '
he doesn't flinch when eli snaps at him, doesn't move at all. his bite is certainly as bad as his bark, snake knows this, but he doesn't intimidate him. he's bested him twice before, though there had been a definite twinge of some unpleasant emotion at having to wrestle a child to the ground. he'd had to fight him, else get a knife in the gut. eli's strong, tenacious... and completely ungrateful.
snake doesn't advance on him when he backs away. he isn't in the business of intimidating children for the fun of it. part of him still thinks that if eli insists on being treated like an adult they ought to indulge him. but that line of thought always leads him back to chico, how he'd looked on that last helicopter ride back from cuba. eli's too young to know what he's stepping into, regardless of what he says. so it's patient conversations and it's locking him in his room when those inevitably don't work.
his eyebrow shoots up at what eli says. chummy? either the kid is exaggerating or some of the soldiers are going beyond their assigned duties. they have people for the childcare, tutors and child psychologists. the soldiers are there to guard, nothing more.
"something happen with the soldiers?" he asks, still calm even as eli looks at him like a cornered animal. "we have methods to handle things like that. ones that don't involve dismemberment."
they haven't been able to pry into eli's history enough to know why he acts like this. why his first answer is always violence, why he can't listen to reason. the other kids in his unitâdisbanded unit, rememberârespond better to their efforts. this is the closest snake has ever felt to cracking him, this vulnerable admission that eli bites out at him.
"you think any of us get what we ask for?" a hard edge forms on his words, hard as he tries to quell it. he's awash in memories of all the times someone else had decided his life for him. "you take what you get and you make it work."
@livinglie
The muzzle of his gun pressed gently against the back of the stranger's head. It had taken a few minutes to get into position without being seen, more so with Eli jumping around and forcing the fight outside. Why his brother had opted to fight instead of talking, he couldn't say, but the way the stranger was manhandling him was enough to convince David that this wasn't a friend. His hands didn't shake on the pistol, and he was glad to find his voice didn't shake either. "Put him down. Now. Or I'll shoot."
damn.
it had been hell enough quelling the violence within the child he already has hands on. snake is fine with the idea of bringing the kids in. battlefield's no place for them, kaz is right. makes operating in this area more difficult, too. but his is not a body that is accustomed to holding back, so taking them down without injury is something that requires focus.
too much focus, perhaps, if he missed the kid behind him altogether. he stills. he can sense no hesitation in the way the gun presses against his head, no wavering in the young voice. just lucky he's asking questions first and shooting later.
there's nothing to do for it, not in this moment. he can't take the kid out fast enough, not when he's still busy with the other one. he drops the blondeâthe white mambaâinto a heap on the ground. he keeps his hands visible, doesn't go for his gun. he won't need it.
"not trying to hurt anyone," he says, voice calm and steady. "put the gun down, let's talk."
send me questions you have about my character!
anything and everything. favorites. thoughts on people, on events. what they would do in a certain situation. how things would be different if something had/hadnât happened. simple questions, complex questions. have at it!
babe are you okay you reblogged got that fog in me 11 times
wait, i did? i don't remember doing that...
@livinglie
Everyone clap for non consensual body modification everybody loves a character whose body has been altered against their will
@morisenatha || just because :)
wrasse prides herself on her unwavering focus. her commitment to her job. to her duty. she's one of the best medics they have on this base and she damn well knows it. not that the title really matters to her. some of the soldiers, they live and die by the recognition they get from the boss. wrasse? she just wants to bring everyone home safe.
she's on the medical platform for once, tending to duties around the base rather than in the field. while her specialty is battlefield medicine, those skills transfer just fine to the fancy hospital rooms miller's got them set up with here. nothing but the best he'd said with that smile of his. it's true, though. she hasn't had facilities this nice since medical school.
she's in-between tasks when the door to the main wing slides open. there, backlit by the evening glow off of the ocean, is the most beautiful woman she's ever seen. she almost drops the supplies she's holding, boxes of gauze and bandages. most of the women kicking around base aren't really her typeâshe doesn't want a butch and the really pretty ones are busy trying to catch the sub-commander's eye. this one is new, though. she'd heard the boss had picked up some new civilians, but hadn't had the time or inclination to investigate further. a mistake, it seems. there's no way this stranger is a soldier. not with hair like that.
she drops the boxes on an open counter and strides across the room, lips already tugging up at one side in a smile. this is work, technicallyâwhat if she needs something? but even if she doesn't, wrasse won't fault herself for a little bit of chatter on the clock here and there. she isn't crane.
"afternoon. everythin' alright, miss?"
opening the door like a bouncer for tim after he beats mgsv. unfuckinbelievable he avoided spoilers on here for so long
Had been observing the adult for some time now, from a distance searches for what made him ever so omnipresent in the thoughts of others, there he was larger than life, like the folk heroes they would tell stories about back home. In person however he didn't seen all that much bigger or scarier than any other adult, nothing about him was that special. He was made of flesh and bone like the rest, they all burn the same, the child thinks to himself.
Feeling embolden the child ignores Eli instructions to lay low and reveals himself to man, appealing behind him like the apparition they breathe him to be. The child's cold Blank stare fixes on the older man through the lenses of his mask, head tilting to the side, curious as to why he wasn't being shot at yet.
there. he recognizes it. them. him? impossible to tell with the mask on. the child from the hospital. from the clashes with skull face and sahelanthropus. he'd half thought it was a hallucinationâdoctor had promised he'd be having those, but there's been nothing to speak of. the kid certainly looks like something a hallucination would cook up. it's only ocelot's recent talk of psi phenomena that gives him pause.
nothing is flying around the room. no giant robot is trying to crush him. no man on fire bearing down on him. it seems safe... for now. he's careful to keep his posture casual, crosses his arm to quell the instinct to grab his gun. not yet.
"...identify yourself."