Liz

I like things a lot for someone with no object permanence.

[the-muppet-joker]

Twilight Sparkle is unhappy with you.

Twilight Sparkle doesn't know a damn thing about my life! Only God can judge me now

[liz-a-bitch]

And how do you know Twilight Sparkle ISNT God? After all we all know God is a Women.

[liz-a-bitch]

I submitted a art piece to a local art show and it got accepted, the thing is it’s Spooky themed for Halloween and I don’t really think it’s that scary… anyway this is teeth on a cob

[liz-a-bitch]

Just realized I never posted my homemade furby. Her name is Klep (short for Kleptomania Arson Innocence) I scarified several stuffed animals to make her!

[strange-aeons]

Hello humans I have a bonkers request for video content. I want you to write me some Tumblr fake stories. I know that your cringiest 2012 self is still in there clawing to be free and i want you to let them out. Do your absolute worst.

I plan to select 10-15 ish stories (depending on length) for a video. I haven’t decided yet if its gonna be something along the lines of “can you tell which of these are real or fake” or just “look at these hot new tumblr fake stories by my audience”

Please comment on or reblog this post with your fake story. If you post yours as a separate post just make sure that you leave me a link to it in the comments of this post or I might not be able to find it.

[liz-a-bitch]

Oh my fuxking Ghawd!!!??!??!!?!!

So my middle school took a week trip to dc cause it’s an election year, it was ok besides the weird guys from my school getting trump hats and then getting in trouble for playing with the “lips” of a Hilary hat, I don’t know how they expected for us not to see them but whatever…..

Anyways we went to this mall inside of the underground and they let us go off by ourselves, apparently some boys got in trouble for carrying Victoria’s Secret bags but any ways. I went off by myself cause none of my friends were on the trip, and I looked down at my knock off docks, my aglets were all fxcked cause I kept stepping on them( I had tryed fixing them with tape but that didn’t last long).I sit down to try and figure out if really needed new shoes laces or if they could make it the rest of the trip.

When all of the sudden this old guy in a suit with a baseball hat on walks by as he leaves Hot topic and drops a pack of brand new shoelaces, ( who the fuxck just buys shoe laces from hot topic there’s so much cool stuff in there), I pick them up and look at them, they were pink and had hello kitty on them, when I look up the old guy was gone, so I figured “ oh well, guess there mine.” Which is great right ? I now don’t have to spend money on new shoe laces, right???

Well I had nothing better to do so I started putting in my new laces, when I hear

“ wtf joe the fucx did you do with my new laces? I SPECIFICALLY asked for cute new laces so I can look swag as h£ll!!!!!”

“ idk B I just had them I sweaaaaaara !”

I quickly lace up my Faocks

(Fake docks) to avoid suspicion. And hurry to the food court where i supposed to meet at my dumb ash schooolmatez

I LITERALLY (ACTUALLY) STOLE MY SHOELACES FROM THE PRESIDENT!!

[badjokesbyjeff]

Batman: *buys catwoman a drink*

Catwoman: slowly knocks it off of the table

[enoughtohold]

who is she

[regularlesbian]

woman seeking woman. i’m six feet tall, fashionable, and enjoy long walks through brackish estuary water off the coast of virginia

[estebanwaseaten]

She’s our most famous cryptid 

[theweddingofthefoxes]

The bae in the bay

[osheamobile]

The Chesapeake Bae

[liz-a-bitch]

How to make worm heart.

-Cut wax paper into a heart

- put hot glue around edge

- stick worm to hot glue

- tape to wall

Pretty self-explanatory but I think it’s fucking cute!

FYI I have a great plan to make a worm dress but it will take some time

[liz-a-bitch]

I have made 3 giant worm on a sting body pillows which I will now bless you with seeing

There names (from left to right) are Needle, Noodle, and Nettle.

https://youtu.be/YC4yd84h9IQ