The Coolest Loser You Know

She/her — I like things a normal amount don’t worry about it

[lord-pretzel]

A new Lord-Pretzel pinned post? On my blog? It's more likely than you think.

★I'm Lord-Pretzel! Call me Pretzel or LP (Not my real name obvs lol)

★She/Her, Bi, Autistic, English

★Mutuals feel free to dm! (I am terrible at replying though sorryyyyy)

★ Everyone feel free to send me asks! Please, I love being bothered.

★ My posts tag -> #I just say shit recreationally

★ My asks tag -> #ask a pretzel

★ Sometimes I live blog stuff (mostly taskmaster lol) so if you want to filter it I like to tag it -> #pretzel live blogs

Fav things!

★ Music: Pulp, Mitski, MARINA, Tyler, the creator, Lemon Demon, Infinity Song, They Might Be Giants

★ Tv Shows: Red Dwarf, Gravity Falls, The Disastrous Life Of Saiki K, Peep Show, Spaced

★ Video Games: Deltarune, Undertale, The Stanley Parable, Splatoon 3, Tomodachi Life Living The Dream

★ Films: Shaun of the Dead, Frankenstein (2025), Alien, Perfect Blue, Into the Spiderverse

★ Books: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Never Let Me Go, Discworld, Scott Pilgrim, Delicious in Dungeon

★ Other: Drawing, Kandi, Writing, CDs, My Ocs (which you should maybe ask me about maybe please?)

My Other Stuff!

★@pretcil -- My art/writing side blog

★ Lord_Pretzel -- My Ao3

★ Pretzelllll -- My Pinterest

Blinkies under the cut! (Flash Warning!)

[finalfrontierpsychiatrist]

Arlene Rimmer truly is an icon and a moment

[bimmyjimmy]

i didnt know the flash was on

[crabussy]

captivated by his colours. how is he doing this

[bimmyjimmy]

the jimmy summer palette has dropped

[imjunebitch]

[honeybeaus]

Lister in every episode

S10E03 - Lemons

[captain-price-returns]

[horologiiiumart]

girl ⬆️

[soulren]

“Ghosts are real” I can see how you could believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real” it’s very fair and rational that you believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real anymore” I’m about to hear a poem or very sad story

“Ghosts aren’t real yet” the fuck are you going to do

[dduane]

Meanwhile, via Bluesky...

[rogue-ai-cat]

And here is the resulting image. There is at least Someone in the U.K. government who is actually doing their job, and it is Chief Mouser to the Cabinet, Larry the Cat.

Source

[officerhaughtstuff]

You’ve heard of the Roaring 20s........

now get ready for the Screaming 20s - coming to a decade near you in 2020

[heterokatedison]

is it too early or can we start screaming now

[heterokatedison]

in retrospect perhaps we should have started sooner

[jorolle]

this post is the equivalent of a newspaper from the day of the outbreak being blown past by the wind after you wake up in a post apocalyptic world

[sewerfight-deactivated20250114]

my friend was testing perfumes out at the store and she sniffed a bottle and anounced "ngl this bitch kind of sucks" The girl at the counter suddenly looked really sad, and my friend was like "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking about you." And the girl looked up and said "No don't worry, I didn't think that, but I just crushed a ladybug with my shoe" We both took a peak over the counter. she'd stepped on a red m&m

[punkrorschach]

this post is like five posts per post

[lord-pretzel]

I think part of the reason the Weird Route is so horrifying is the fact that it has only been happening for 3 days in game time. Noelle was that close to breaking point, that lost and numb and apathetic that it took less than 3 days of horror to bring her to the lake. The monotony and inescapability of her life means that being manipulated into doing heinous things is a respite to her. It's given her a sense of freedom despite still having no autonomy. And it only took 3 days. 2 even.

Normal route Noelle is probably just as close as well.

[winter-wise]

Me: gosh I sure am having a nice day with all my blood inside my body

The villainous vampire:

[ordinarysparkplug]

telling a vampire "youre not allowed in my house anymore" and they get blasted out through the nearest wall

[captain-price-returns]

the average red state is closer to Sharia Law than Zohran’s NYC

[lonely-space-egg]

[anglaised]

they put me in the embarrassment factory for a eternity long shift

[marnie-performing-stronger-mp4]

ppl on tumblr will claim theyre fans of a piece of media when theyre actually fans of a story & characters they made up in their mind very loosely based on said media