I don't know why ive decided to make this, but I doubt I'll post it so whoop
SFTH Longforms i would love to see as musicals and why:
Cardboard Stegosaurus:
- I just feel like theres some good opportunity for some character songs
- Cliff singing about Marie-Claire - maybe a duet with Pierre where theyre in opposite sides of the stage à la Lily's Eyes from Secret Garden
- a song in the car ride just called "BBC News" that has a funky tune and every so often "BBC news" is sung
The Leftenmost Window:
- duet between Egbert and his wife
- Egbert's wife singing about her feelings before getting interrupted by Egbert/war sounds
- song between Egbert's wife, Sally, and their dad (like Your Fault from Into the Woods) before the mother ends the song peacefully
Mystery of the Midnight Circus:
- im only putting this here because the last scene really reminds me of Jekyll and Hyde and I really friggin love Confrontation
- also Sherlock Holmes musical. Would be fun.
The Lighthouse:
- its so chaotic and I feel like songs would make it worse
- Mario singing with his banjo and cocaine
Strange Noises from the Hole in the Wall:
- I cant think of a reason beyond "I think itd be funny"
- like I cant even think of a good reason for it to be a musical, I just want to see it as one
- dancers as the train then Clarissa joins them?? Maybe Benjamin starts encorporating some of those movements during the confrontation with his father and Locomotion???
Detective versus the Christmas Tree Bandits:
- Frankie and Donnie have a lovely song together about stealing trees and then sad reprise after Donnie dies :)
Bard With a Scar:
- I dont think i need to explain myself with this one
Never Give Annabelle a Gun:
- This is the first one I thought of, mostly for the reason that there is a canonical singing character (Henry), but here are more reasons why
- Butch and Annabelle could have a nice little love duet while riding their horses and also when they confess to each other
- intense music while Annabutch is running from the cops
- an evil version of Henry's earlier song (where his part is the same, but the accompaniment is a bit discordant) during his scene w Butch
- the lack of music while Henry is talking to Annabelle, only for it to come back when Butch arrives (maybe a Butch solo before Annabelles dad shows up????)
- Alternatively: an even eviler version of Henry's song where even his part is turning discordant, then interrupted by Butch
Haunted Diary Entry:
Game of Truth and Tea:
- I just really want to hear someone sing the letter. If someone makes a song version, I will sing it. Please it would be so funny
I Dont Want to Visit Grandma:
- 🎶My name is Ethel! I like to dance!🎶
- as much as it pains me to say, Arthur and his mom's relationship gives me Honk! vibes and I feel like a duet between them (like Hold Your Head up High Reprise) would be lovely
- otherwise I think this would be an amazing animated movie
Last Lullaby:
- I mean... theres already singing
- tbh cant think of any reasons other than creepy background music would be fun
- I feel like broom guy could have a song about brooms. Yeah, thats a good reason.
No Time To Die Twice:
- theres already zombies and spies, why not add songs too!
- Julian could have a series of songs while hes in between zombie and human, maybe kinda like Paul's song in tgwdlm
A/N: I recommend you read the SFTHMM and its companion fics before you read this, as this is the final entry to the the story, and a lot of threads won't make sense if you haven't! I also suggest you read the warnings on the masterpost too.
CW for child death and descriptions of dead bodies
20:06
John Junior was dead.
That's all Julian could think as he poked the body with the stick, wishing for him to wake up. For him to say that it was just a prank. But he never did.
Julian wasn't crying, he just felt numb. As if he wasn't really in his body. He barely even registered the cold autumn breeze.
Janae, the youngest of the group, pulled Julian and Ben - who was now sobbing - away from the body. "Julian, pass me your phone," he said, his voice carefully emotionless.
Julian was on autopilot, pulling his phone from his pocket, passing it to the 9 year-old genius. He wasn't even looking at Janae as he did, just staring at the woods, his vision unfocused.
Janae messed with the phone, humming, "no signal."
"Maybe try to call emergency services? You, uh, don't need any signal for that," Alys tried to keep her voice as steady as Janae's but failed, quite miserably.
He tried to dial 999, but the phone somehow sparked. The screen smashed, and Janae dropped it before the glass could cut him.
"Ben?" Michael tried to comfort the sobbing boy, "Ben, it's alright."
"He's dead-"
Julian stopped listening, because there was a woman in the forest. At least, Julian thought the shadow stood by the treeline was a women, they had the figure of one; albiet, a little hunched over.
The figure didn't say anything, but Julian felt compelled to go towards it - like a moth to a flame. The breeze was calling his name, and the world around him didn't exist. It was just him and the shadow.
He walked towards the figure. Nothing else really mattered to him, his friends' calls falling on deaf ears.
The woman didn't seem to physically move, but she stayed at the same distance. Even as he trudged through the woods, she stayed away.
That was, until he came into a small clearing. The woman stood in the middle, surrounded by a circle of arched trees, illuminated by the moonlight. The woman looked.. old. She sat on a tree stump, the roots reaching upwards as if it could reach up and drag him to hell. The smell didn't match the environment, however, Julian had to withhold a gag. It was awful, yet he couldn't quite pinpoint what the smell was.
She beckoned Julian forward with a single gesture.
"Hi?" Julian managed, somehow. He shook his head, his thoughts suddenly clearing. His friend was dead - maybe this woman could help. "I don't know if you-" he swallowed, "if you saw, but my friend- something happened to my friend and he-"
The woman shushed him, "do you hear that?"
Julian blinked. He focused, but he heard nothing but leaves rustling in the autumn breeze. "Uh. No?"
"No what?"
"I can't hear anything?"
The woman wasn't looking at him anymore, but instead her eyes darted around, "I'm early."
Julian had to admit this woman was.. confusing, "early for what?"
"Murder." A sudden lightning lit up the sky.
His mind reeled, "what? My friend- he was murdered, I think! You knew this was going to happen?"
"Murder? Who mentioned anything about murder? I said memorial."
"What-"
"I'm early for the memorial of the murdered victims, such a shame. It's almost like I knew them myself."
"The memorial was a month ago."
The woman didn't seem to process what he said, "you remind me of someone."
"Thank.. you?"
"Who is it? It's on the tip of my-"
"Tongue?"
"Fingertips."
Julian, despite his grief and confusion, laughed. The woman was perplexed at his laughter.
"I'm Julian, by the way," he held out his hand.
The woman didn't take it, but instead, she simply said, "Margaery!"
"Well, it's nice to meet you, Marga-"
"You remind me of Margaery, that old hag," the woman's - who wasn't Margaery - nose crinkled as if she smelled that horrid smell too.
An uncomfortable silence fell between them, Julian wanted to break it, "so, did you know anyone that died in the massacre?"
The woman tilted her head, "I knew all of them. I was there."
This gave Julian pause, his eyes widened, "what? That's brilliant! Well.. not brilliant, I'm sorry you went through that- but, you were there." Julian caught his breath, "I'm with some of my friends and we are sort of supernatural investigators.. and, oh god, JJ's dead-"
"JJ's not dead, silly!" The woman laughed.
"What?"
"JJ survived!"
Julian knew this woman was mocking him now, his face twisted into a grimace, "no. No. I watched him.. I saw his body. He's dead."
And it's all his fault. If he hadn't insisted that they go ghost hunting for his birthday and just do normal kid stuff, then JJ would still be alive.
But he isn't.
And it's all Julian's fault.
The woman watched him with amusement, his internal struggles clearly visible on his face. The smell was too extreme now.
A stick snapped behind him, and Julian was quick to turn around. He sighed in overwhelming relief as he saw Alys and Janae become visible in the treeline. Their eyes trained on the woman behind him.
"Uhm, Julian? Who were you talking to you?" Janae asked, his gaze never leaving the woman.
Alys inhaled, "you weren't talking to that, were you? Please don't tell me you were."
Julian was rather taken aback by Alys' dehumanising words, he squinted, "I was. Alys, Janae, this is- I didn't actually catch your name, miss-"
He screamed as he turned around. The woman was still there, but she wasn't the same. He now realised what the smell was.
Her face had become more skull than skin, one of her eyeballs had vanished as blood ran down from the socket. She was missing most of her hair, only a few strands remained. Her clothes were as bloodied and as tattered as the rest of her body. Flies flew around her head like a makeshift halo.
She was a corpse.
Julian had been talking to a corpse.
He stepped backwards, tripping on a root that had definitely not been there before. "But- I don't.. I don't understand.. she was just-"
"Julian." Alys said, gripping Julian's shoulders and pulling him up, attempting to ground him, "we need to leave. Like, right now."
"Okay- okay. Yeah, I, uh, I agree."
Alys grabbed his wrist, dragging him to the treeline as he stumbled behind. Julian noticed that it was just them two.
"Janae?" He called back into opening. His panic swelled infinitely as he tried to ignore the dead body and focus on his friend.
Janae looked like he was in agony, his fingers massaging his forehead. His eyes were closed, "sorry, I just got a huge migraine all of a sudden."
"Hurry up! We have to get the others and go!" Alys shouted, her frustration growing.
But Julian's worry only grew as he watched a dark liquid flow from both Janae's eyes and nose. His fingers left his forehead and touched the liquid. Janae looked at it, and his eyes widened.
Barely a second later a loud pop echoed through the forest.
Janae's brains splattered onto the grass, onto the body, onto the trees, onto Julian. A scream disturbed the leaves - maybe it came from Julian, maybe it came from Alys. There's a small chance it came from Janae himself.
Julian watched as Janae's headless body fell to the ground in seemingly slow motion, he landed on his knees, before finally falling to the ground, his stomach on the grass.
Tears pricked at Julian's eyes, he pulled himself out of Alys' grip, her shouts falling on deaf ears. He ran towards the body, but stopping in his tracks as the woman's body shuddered.
Like a puppet on a string, her arm reached up as her head fell forward. She was pointing at him, "antichrist."
He felt his breathing stop.
Nobody had called him that. Not since-
"Julian, we need to go, please!"
What was he going to say to Johnny? How was he supposed to explain that his brilliant baby brother was gone?
"I'm sorry," he cried out as he reached for the body, cradling it, "I'm so, so sorry," he cried as Janae's blood was on his face. "I'm sorry," he cried, as Johnny would when he found out.
But he had no time to mourn, as Alys grunted.
And Julian's panic reached its peak.
She was fighting against a branch, that had somehow wrapped around her wrist, dragging her downwards.
"Hey! Hey! Get off!" She screamed at it, as she tried to tug herself away.
Julian tried to stand up and help, he really did, but he couldn't. He was frozen.
A root snaked its way around her ankle, and she fell forward. She reached for Julian, as if a final attempt at getting any help from him. Her eyes, full of tears, were silently begging.
Alys knew there was no hope. She knew her time was up, Julian could see it in her glistening eyes.
But Julian didn't even attempt to help her, he just sat cradling the body of his friend, watching another be dragged to the depths of the earth. To hell.
She didn't scream, nor did she struggle. In her final moments she accepted it, a small, sad, somewhat tired smile had appeared on her face.
Julian shook his head and closed his eyes, and when he opened them, there was no trace of her ever being here. Save for the small, leather-bound book resting where she once stood.
Julian didn't help her, he didn't move, she could've been saved. And yet, she was gone.
Janae had long since grown cold in his grasp.
Three of Julian's friends were gone, and it was all his fault.
OH my god i fucking love it! I knew exactly what it was even before reading your caption tee hee
(oh, as a side note, I got my mother into ABOFAL; I showed her a few but her favourite is the one in which they're at the vet, and Hugh has a cat which he's brought to be killed because it has cancer. She really liked the CANCY-WANCY line lmaoo I think that's my favourite one too.)
german knickknack guy from thde is in fact named charles buttons, but he also names his store “nick’s knacks”. people ask him who nick is and he’s just like
“well im the only employee”
“so you’re nick?”
“no im charles”
“then who’s nick”
“idk you tell me”
people inevitably get annoyed and he thinks it’s very funny.
that absolutely sounds like him nicky my guy you nailed it. he employs you. now you are nick. mmm Box time for you
i just realised that when I imagine Farmer Maggot's mushroom field, it's like a normal green field with grass. But they're mushrooms, they need dark, damp soil so it wouldn't be very green at all! I don't know where my brain thought the mushrooms would be growing? For some reason I was imagining them to be cultivated like wheat.
I think it's time for my yearly lord of the rings reread...
discoholicmusic
dailybridgerton
blakekathryn
kianamaiart
jbbartram-illu
origamiaround
yousharknotpass
