gibson girl

🦌 she/they femme lesbian multifandom cannibal & vampire apologist

[tankhall]

i miss my vibrator

[hanbonpilled]

[tankhall]

In 2018, I wrote down a passing thought in my cheap little leather-bound journal I was writing a collection of songs in that would go on to become Preacher’s Daughter. “If I finish this album the way it needs to be finished, it will change my life, and it will leave a hole in my heart for years that I won’t know how to fill.” I’ve always had a knack for eerily accurate self-premonition. Preacher’s Daughter certainly left a hole, and it certainly changed my life, but only on the outside. All the songs I wrote for it were about characters, a girl in a “faraway” place living her “faraway” life, albeit still parallel to mine, but wholly detached from me. Willoughby was doomed to be closer to home. I wrote Nettles and Waco the same week, the first week I spent in the Alabama house where I would finish Preacher’s Daughter after so many years of trying. The difference was I wrote them about me. There were no characters at first; it was just me. In fact, I wrote them in an attempt to hide from Ethel Cain for a moment. She eventually devoured those little ditties too, of course, as she always does. In hindsight, I’m glad I had to share them with her. I couldn’t have carried the full weight of them myself, I know that now. My premonitions were out in full force; over the course of the next few years, I’d script out my own life in the same morbid fashion I always have. Maybe it was a lesson in not training my eye downward as I’ve spent the majority of my life doing.

I had 3 weeks for the holidays between mixing and submitting Perverts and jumping back into the maw of taming an unfinished Willoughby Tucker. I spent the first three months of 2025 on probation, unable to go much of anywhere, awake only when the sun was down. I’d never mixed a record of that magnitude, which was daunting with deadlines immovable. I remember 9am on my 27th birthday rolling around after being awake for hours whittling away at mixes, announcing the album and entire tour before going back to mix an album that still wasn’t done. I’ve never cried so much finishing a record, and that was before it was even out. Combining your Saturn return, your first shot at true love, and the longest tour of your life is something I would never recommend to anyone. It was the death of both ego and everything around it. I couldn’t be more grateful. Never in my life have I been so turned inside out, so uprooted and unraveled. Looking back, I needed it more than anything.

Thank you to everyone who listened. Ethel Cain and Willoughby Tucker will always be my children, my burnt offerings, what I leave in the storm. Sometimes I wish it didn’t have to be this way, but I also fear it’s the only way. Ethel Cain, Willoughby Tucker, I really will always love you. I feel as though in this moment here, saying goodbye, you and I are closer than ever. I hope you can forgive me.

[roanlovesvampires]

"ur mad that the monsters in the show about monsters are actually being monsters! 🤪"

i'm glad y'all who only watch the show for the torture porn and shockingly bigoted jokes are happy, but i was actually watching it for the character development and the examination of love, morality, and immortality....

if i wanted to watch something for gore and political incorrectness, i'd watch some slasher film from the 90s

[overthecurb]

ethel cain summer

[dakilangdiwata]

Ma Cherie!

(Claudeleine healings for all of us...)

Print here!

[2deliicate]

this is all i'll be thinking about for the next week thank you

[oweyouablackeyeandtwokisses]

Am I making you feel sick?

[vamplire]

carmilla movie now because i want it

[lottiecain]

sister joined tumblr and i had to make her match louclaudia with me

[cinnamonyukimiya]

bitch

[lottiecain]

🙄

[lottiecain]

sister joined tumblr and i had to make her match louclaudia with me

[vamplire]

[lottiecain]

unironically being obsessed with fictional gay people actually saved my life like if i’m not distracted i’m highly suicidal i have to inject my brain with media or i’ll explode

[only-alter-idem]

whoever decided to put shauna in flannel deserves a raise oh my god she’s so fine

[lottiecain]

500 posts!

[mortalfathers]

comparing book loumand quotes to tvl loumand (but can extend to iwtv) its like wow so the white versions of these characters can exchange lines like: "who else, knowing us as we know each other, could do anything but destroy us? yet we can love each other" and "i'll fight for you (louis)" and have a relatively amicable breakup despite how apathetic they both are but when the characters are racebent in the tv adaptation to be a black man and a south asian man suddenly the love was never there? suddenly they can't understand each other??? suddenly their relationship and its fallout must progress through violence and brutality?

[vqtkufi]

‘Always on my own’

@tankhall