Natsu: My mental instability caused by messed up family issues is nothing compared to the amount of shitty happenings that are coming towards me.
Lucy: Let's talk about it dear.
Gray: 1!11! E.N.D.!!!111!
Erza: I'm actually immortal and I kick the fuck out of villains
Happy: Burned pawns. Burned pawns everywhere.
Wendy: Saving people's asses since 2006
Charles: Saving Mashima's ass by covering his plot holes since 2006
Gajeel: So apparently there's this thing called love
Levy: Feeling like Romeo and Juliet. Just... Alive.
Juvia: The fans know me as the "once upon a time she was a great character that could fight like a badass" girl
Mirajane : I'm strong af but there's God Erza so i'm destined to fight annoying lolis
Lisanna: What's my meaning in this war anyway
Laxus: Giving life advices to a 100 years old tactician because beautiful speech
Mavis: Vengeful girlfriend attack is ready. Prepare for launch.
Raijinshuu: Aw fuck we thought we could finally have some more screentime
Mest: Being a pedo during wars requires talent
Makarov: Let's not talk about plans, forbidden magics and nakama words
Bisca: My fight was longer than Mirajane's lol
Romeo: Lisanna-senpai notice me
Chelia: Currently in the "my fight didn't have any meaning" club
Lyon: Who the fuck cares about wars anyway? Let's randomly fall in love with pink-haired criminals
Obaba: Good ol' days when youngsters didn't start wars before and after breakfast
Jellal: Hey I thought defeating one spriggan was enough why am I with August now it's not fair
Ultear: People missed my booty
Meredy: Gruvia. Gruvia parallelisms. Do you see them?
Macbeth: All of this has nothing to do with me yet I'm here fighting against the world's strongest man. send help for this poor soul
Angel: Finding long lost sister in a forest just like buying things in a supermarket? Check. Tearful reunion? Check. Being absolutely useless and annoying for the rest of the story? Check.
Hoteye: I actually had a long lost brother too but never mind.
Sting: Good morning. This is Sting Eucliffe's voice mail. If you want to let a record, speak after the acoustic sound.
Rogue: I'm a shadow. Did you understand? A shadow. Apparently Alvarez's people need at least two chapter to get this fact.
Yukino: Sorano-nee is proud of me because I'm being really useful too!
Minerva: Looking at this villains gives me nostalgic feelings...
Kagura: I, the queen of Yuri, will get another chance to shine in a fight against an impossible enemy. Watch me, Erza.
Millianna: Cats are all that matters
Toby: Dogs are all that matters
Yuka: Eyebrows will rule the world.
Trimens: Are we actually characters of this manga?
Zeref: I don't think human words can explain what am I doing right now.
August: Youngsters nowadays. But let's beat asses since I'm here
Wahl: I am the only villain who has been KILLED by a ft member during this arc and I feel so attached right now
Ajeel: At least I didn't die
Neinhart: What did I do to deserve this beating
Brandish: What did I do to deserve this one-sided love from a psycho
Invel: I hate love stories that bring victory. I hate love stories. I hate love.
Jacob: I'm sorry assassins of this world
God Serena: Too fabulous to have a proper fight
Eileen: I'm clever, beautiful, strong. The perfect woman. It's just that sometimes I'm a little too murderous
Acnologia: Taking breaks during wars because why not