My heart has been filled with resentment for the last few years over the unfulfilled apologies I had hoped for. That may be the cause of my depression. I am defending myself against allegations that I caused the separation of a couple who were supposedly married. In fact, they had been separated for more than six months before I was involved. Moreover, there was another girl who was linked to him before me.
She created a fictitious Instagram account and stalked me. I discovered this by checking who was viewing my stories. I reached out to her to understand how she felt. However, the situation took a turn for the worse. At the time, she was dating someone else, and together they repeatedly stalked my account and made false accusations.
At first, I tried to ignore it, but it escalated to the point where they judged my appearance and made comments about my current relationship, which was unacceptable. She became even more furious when I posted about my relationship on Instagram. Using the fake account, she posted a story questioning why there was a need to make our relationship public.
This is my Instagram account, and I had already been posting about my relationship before she ever said anything about sharing it.
I was not comfortable with the situation because I had been cheated on in my previous relationship, but I never treated them the way she treated me. I was not part of their relationship and had never been involved in their separation, yet I was dragged into their issues.
I later discovered that my photo was being circulated in their group chat, accompanied by unreasonable and offensive comments about me. I stood up for myself, and more people became involved. Some of my friends sent me screenshots of a discussion on a post where she and her colleague labeled me as “the immature girl.”
That was not the worst of it. Her siblings began messaging me, saying they would file a case against me. Although she is currently outside the country, they claimed that I was the reason for their argument. They used words like “gago” and “papansin.” Those words deeply hurt someone who is still healing from a toxic relationship and trying to fix herself.
She also sent a message to my partner’s mother, claiming that her entire family was upset with me.
I developed anxiety and depression. A month after our last dispute, I found out that I was three weeks pregnant, and I burst into tears. After that, I stopped defending myself and blocked everyone who was causing me pain. I did not want to lose my child because of these circumstances.
I prayed to God to save me, and He answered my prayer with a child. From that moment on, I knew this child was the answer.
I know there is a purpose in why God placed me in this situation—vulnerable and lost, yet searching for peace of mind. I noticed myself becoming stronger with each step of that search. I believe I found the cure, but I failed to recognize it as the cure I was looking for. It was there in front of me, waiting for acknowledgment and acceptance.
I realize that I didn't actually need her apology nor to give her my forgiveness. It was acceptance that at some point of life we will meet people who will turn our life upside down. Life will continue each day until our last breath. Some people will move on, while others won't. It was now our decision to either be in vain or start anew. I know that all wounds heal with time, so I won't mind if we make amends in the future. I move on, and so does life. Right now, my priorities are my growing family.
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