New and Improved

Sooooo this is my new blog from LuminousFoxfire and LumiFox27..im still messing with those trying to sort it out. Will spruce this one up. Icon created by Mewchao

[oribiys-remade-deactivated20200]

everytime i move i crunch like popcorn

[battenna]

and everytime we kiss i swear i could fly

[d0nn0-deactivated20150125]

i got a headache :/

[d0nn0-deactivated20150125]

google says im gonna die

[kuxco-deactivated20140828]

why is google sending you death threats for having a headache

[luisonte]

Crea tu propia minibarbacoa

[strangegirl32]

@brattylikestoeat this is the opposite of that fire pit guy but equally as interesting. Like I’m barely willing to find the good pot to cook.

[worm-monger]

[deliriumcrow]

That depends entirely on the bakery, and the customer, in question.

[freedom-of-fanfic]

tumblr is awful in general but the actual worst thing about this site is that it doesn’t have timestamps.was that terrible take from 5 minutes or 5 years ago? who knows!! certainly not the person climbing into OP’s inbox to scream at them anonymously

[taggedrne]

when ur iphone charger starts wearing a turtleneck u know the end is coming

[taggedrne]

[tastefullyoffensive]

(photo via princessmisery)

[ajax-daughter-of-telamon]

This is a great idea!

[chemicalheart-deactivated202009]

this is really cool. Kids hate the big plastic keys cos they’re not interesting, they wanna see the things the grownups use all the time

[callmebliss]

I kinda want one of these.

[voidbat]

DUDE. it’s a giant fucking stim board! GENIUS.

[rootbeergoddess-deactivated2017]

This is brilliant 

[elionking-deactivated20191020]

Shit, I might make one of these for myself

[moonmoyo]

^^

[aughtomaton]

This is extremely devopmentally appropriate and smart

[specificfuckery]

[gallifreyfieldsforever]

I sincerely believe that by 7th year Ravenclaws would just tell the door to their common room to fuck off and it would open for them

[kyrael]

Q “Why is a raven like a writing desk?”  A “You shouldn’t shove either up your arse.”  “…Technically, yes.”

[mrsmarymorstan]

Imagine it, a poor First Year is waiting outside the common room, they can’t answer the riddle in a way to appease the eagle and must wait until someone else to answer it for them. It’s getting late, they’re starting to resign themselves to having to spend the night here. 

Suddenly, their saviour comes! It’s a seventh year! Back from a night finishing off their Araithmancy essay in the Library. They look angry, but our poor little first year squares their shoulders, waiting to see what will happen, and hope that they’ll keep the door open for them. 

The Seventh Year bangs the handle against the wall, and a slightly disgruntled voice asks the question again: “What is the truth?”

The Student Replies, “The Truth is that I am so fucking sick of all these mother fucking questions about stupid fucking topics like this you bloody fuck-witted bastard. Who in the name of Merlin’s saggy left testicle gives a fucking damn about all this shit anyway? I’ve been working my arse off in the library for the last seven hours now let me the fuck in or, truthfully, I’ll blast my way in and take you with me.”

The eagle knocker tutts, but allows the student entry anyway, and our little first year enters, eyes wide and in shock. They watch the seventh year go up to their bedroom, awe all over their face at their new hero. They did, indeed, learn something that day by waiting for someone to arrive, they learnt that swearing has a magic all of it’s fucking own, and that sometimes it is big and clever to use it. 

[aphoenixinwriting-deactivated20]

The only head canon I will ever accept. Its both perfectly witty and fantastically assholish

[avocadamnit-deactivated20161008]

witty and fantastically assholish… pretty much quintessential ravenclaw traits right there

[whenflowersfade]

My favorite version of this headcanon is that there is one Ravenclaw who went all seven years by answering the riddles with some variation of “not a potato” and was only ever wrong once.

[squat-damn-deactivated20200919]

[glitterweave]

Toxic playing in the background makes this video

[surprisebitch]

[stimman4000]

.

[rabbitindisguise]

"it's that fuckin chocolate guy again!!" I say, already knowing I'm gonna reblog

[westafricanbaby]

My Godddd

[corona-the-nightcutter]

W I T C H C R A F T

[chewedcorn]

My mom got tired of me making fun of her “Live Laugh Love” sign and modified it.

[brokentripod]

DCH

[abduction]

[kingkilling-and-stormlight]

SKY WHALE SKY WHALE SKY WHALE

[malus-syl-vestris-deactivated20]

No. Look at the position of the tail fins. They’re perpendicular rather than parallel to the ground. That’s a sky shark.

[gnomebud]

SKY SHARK SKY SHARK SKY SHARK

[theonion]

Knife Condemned To Week Inside Saran-Wrapped Brownie Pan

[fullmetalfisting]

This is the funniest message I’ve ever gotten

[stem-stims]

Physics: More pencil tricks

Source

[dexer-von-dexer]

i.e. why when you or someone else gets stabbed or impaled, you should leave the object in the wound until medical help arrives.

[wildlyannoyingdoofus]

THIS. RIGHT HERE. This is an amazing example!!

If you take the thing out, they’re going to bleed a lot more.

SO. DONT.

News Flash from the Medical Help ™ — we don’t touch it either! Unless the object they’re impaled with is literally too big to fit in the ambulance, We. Don’t. Touch. The. Thing.

The only people qualified to Take-The-Thing-Out are surgeons. End of story.

Okay, but for the love of God, please, PLEASE, if you did, if you panicked and took the thing out…. DON’T…. PUT IT BACK IN.

Or else, congratulations, you just stabbed them AGAIN. I reeeeeally shouldn’t have to say this guys, but I do.

[kimmycup]

Congratulations,

YOU JUST STABBED THEM AGAIN

[five-flats]

i feel like that last comment should be accompanied by a bill-wurtz-style jingle

[sabertoothwalrus]

last night my brother asked me if I ever get two completely unrelated songs stuck in my head together and then several hours later sends me this

[sabertoothwalrus]

this song is just what executive dysfunction feels like

[ismayell]

These computer programs taught themselves how to walk.

Generation 80 don’t give a shit.

[viostormcaller]

Gen 80 is just vibing. They literally just vibing

[illthdar]

It’s just so proud of itself.

[ratherinterestingmilkshake]

Gen 20 looks up after it fell down I’m-

[xxtc-96xx]

Gen 80 when one of your favourite songs comes up on your playlist