Things-I-Heard-At-School

[jerico3193]

[frizz01percy]

this should be the most reblogged post on tumblr before it dies

[xan-thos-blog]

We need to reblog this so much that the post breaks

[bittymoonbear-deactivated201807]

Do not like

[secret-unicorn-sierra-blog]

Keep. Reblogging.

[dawn-machine-official]

If we reblog enough we could save it

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

finally made that patreon page ya’ll been on about

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

that’s fair. i did make a real one though

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

boost this please

[trans-junk-rat]

[mcrtookmyvirginity]

Um……. Taylor Swift kept me a virgin??

[c4n0fwormz]

cleantough

[cynical-spucksy-deactivated2020]

rebornworstenemy

[mystic-terrors]

twentyfourwithout10in

[pipebomb-malewife-deactivated20]

Busy saint Joan?

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

corpse flowers only come in one color

[teacupfulofstarshine]

um … 

coffee mug pouring out darkness?

[poisonedapples]

Venemouscarrot

[softestvirgil]

hardestlogan

[panicattheeverywhere13]

Calmouttheenowhere0

[lunchconversations]

Breakfast thoughts

[lunchconversations]

“i am not crying. It is seriously just allergies. Stupid living things”

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

E:Do you know what he did in the back of my car? HE POOPED! Not even normal poop. It. Was. Everywhere.

E:i think i only noticed it once winter comes around because in the summer i blast the air conditioner and have my windows down but in the winter my car is really hot.

[lunchconversations]

E:And it cooked. 

[lunchconversations]

S:FEMINISTS ARE RUINING MY LIFE!

T:You do realize... you are female... they are fighting FOR our rights.

S: Yeah. But now i am supposed to do stuff for myself, like, can i just cook and clean and raise kids and die? Let my husband go to work and fix the car and stuff. i just wanna knit a baby blanket for our kid.

[lunchconversations]

K:Mushu look at the camera you’re photogenic, come on you d-HEYA

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

E:my boobs are out and OH MY GOD THERE IS WIND IN MY TITS. 

E:...

E: It’s cold.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

A: can you strangle a person without killing them?

B: You shouldn’t hurt people at all. whether they die or not it is still wrong.

C-at the same time:Kinky.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

E:i’m understand your squirrel.

T:Explain. 

E:You know those dogs from the movie Up? Like when they all see a squirrel? We both see the same squirrel that distracts us from whatever we are talking about, so when you randomly say something without any context or point something out without any actual indication as to what it is i still know what you are talking about because i understand your squirrel. SQUIRREL THEORY.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

A: I would like an extra, extra, extra small fry, like take a small fry and just throw most of the fries away. And... Are your cheeseburgers vegan? I want a vegan cheeseburger and uh... can i get an extra large diet caffeine free uncarbonated sprite? And i want a 21 piece chicken nugget but can you just take some of all of the sauces and drizzle it over them? I would really appreciate it. And i need two straws, six forks, three knives, and a spoon. 

Alright, if this chick wasn’t just joking around with her friend and we had actually been at an arbys i would have slapped her for the poor lady taking her order.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

T:I hate to break it to ya sweatheart, but... uh, you sound kinda like a serial killer.

M:Sometimes you gotta be like that for money.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

A:I had shit to do this weeked!

B:Yeah! ME!

...

C:Odd flex but okay.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

T:I can’t tell if she fell or if that was just another dramatic flop but i am scared.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

E:Resistance is FUTILE!

T:You’re futile! No, I’m kidding I love you.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

E:Do you know what he did in the back of my car? HE POOPED! Not even normal poop. It. Was. Everywhere.

E:i think i only noticed it once winter comes around because in the summer i blast the air conditioner and have my windows down but in the winter my car is really hot.

[lunchconversations]

Overheard

K:They shove it up their ass.

C: like a backwards kangaroo?