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🔸Ocasional anxiety induced rambles🔸
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Pondering my initial reaction to Tenna for his birthday and I think what struck me first and foremost about him is I’ve never seen an antagonist before or since that is trying to avoid the conflicts in the story as much as I wanted to and it led to a lot of personal reflection on why that is.
(Explanation under cut)
I went in assuming Tenna was gonna be almost how he gets portrayed in fanon frequently where he was fixated on making people play his games forever out of loneliness/need for attention, and I kinda braced myself from the start for when he stopped being “fun” and fell into his role as a villain. Like the archetype that wants to make people happy or play with them and loses it when people try to leave. Taking the nostalgia motif into a predictable childish behavior.
Around the weather duo fight I initially thought that’s why he was trying so much to make them stop arguing, and I was nervous going out towards Toriel the first time because I thought it’d be a breaking point where the gang got punished in some way for going somewhere they weren’t supposed to be, but that’s when I reached the part that made me reconsider everything I’d seen up to that point:
He pretends it didn’t happen and tries to move on. It felt like flinching for a punch that never comes. It had me reconsidering his behavior up to that point and realizing how much effort went into just trying to keep people happy for the sake of conflict avoidance, but it wasn’t until the Doom Board that everything clicked fully and unsettlingly into place.
This. This right here immediately brought me harshly to exactly why he was acting the way I would have tried to.
Doing my best to not get too personally detailed in the “how Tenna personally affected me” essay, but most of my upbringing involved most family members arguing with each other frequently and primarily living with a loud and irritable parent who would generally use anyone nearby as a venting target whenever they felt the need to, so most of the coping I’d learned and even been explicitly told a couple times was “stay in your room, play your games, don’t worry about it” while hearing said argument very clearly from the other room. Later on this would lead to using headphones most of the time to try and drown out noise or generally shutting down and spacing out or hyperventilating any time I got scolded for long periods of time, and it really didn’t fully click with me how or why this happened until this moment.
Because at that moment I knew the exact feeling behind that statement. You can’t stop it, agree with them, let them vent, go hide and watch something if you can get out. Brace yourself.
Especially with his position as an object fixed in the middle of the house and not being physically able to get away from the situation, while perceiving oneself as the cause of the argument, (Tenna’s guilt as his position as a positive form of entertainment and distraction, myself and I’d wager Kris as well’s as the subject of argument in a divorce, honestly there’s a whole other essay to be had about how chapter 3 reflects Kris’ emotional state and upbringing) causes him to feel trapped and helpless yet simultaneously culpable for what he’s experiencing, and the feeling of being trapped in a situation you don’t want to be in, especially as a result defending a stance you only go along with for a promised end result (his deal with Kris & the Knight) hit exceedingly close to home. You even see it throughout the rest of the chapter where he folds immediately after any threat he makes out of desperation and trying to keep his employees around.
This is what really stands out to me about Tenna as a character. He’s forced to experience horrible things while partially blaming himself for it and tries everything in his power to try and prevent conflict at every turn. He straight up doesn’t fight you until you’re right in front of Toriel and he has no other options. And that’s what I sorta wish I could see more about in his fandom portrayal. He’s not looking for attention or guilt tripping to get his way. He’s scared of another fight while being forced into conflict by a deal he has no real other choice but to take (it’s essentially “sell out your family or die” at this point) and can’t take it when he can’t keep the act going and people start turning on him. I think the one time I’ve seen this really well portrayed is Dark Fountain Within by @/tennas-t-v-time but I’d love to see it explored more often.
Anyways rant over. The TV made me come to terms with the psychological impacts of divorce and generally being around family members that barely tolerate each other. Happy Tennaverssary.
Thanks to ultrasounds, the genders can be assigned before birth. The people are so excited to conform they throw “Gender reveal parties” to make sure their offspring exist in a strict binary since before they can even form thoughts.
i know folks are gonna call me a pedo for this one, but i grew up seeing my mom and grandma naked. they had health issues and at times needed care and help showering. and i truly think more kids need to be shown the nonsexual reality of naked women at a young age. there is nothing sexual about my grandmothers breasts, they were simply body parts. more women die of heart attacks because people are too afraid of breasts to do real chest compressions, because they are scared to touch their breasts. the sexualization of our bodies literally kills us. i need people to be more normal about naked bodies and i'm 100% serious.
if you are a parent, or may become one, or you are otherwise likely to arrive in the situation of caring for a child while they eat, promise me this: if a child doesn't like a certain food or food group, you will ask them WHY. and specifically, you will pay attention to either confirming or ruling out "it makes my mouth itch" or "it makes my stomach hurt," both of which are medically important info that children may not provide unprompted. which i know because this PSA has been brought to you by "i spent my entire childhood and much of my early teens eating peas and lentils while wondering why everyone else liked the Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation so much, like were they a bunch of legume masochists or something, before i finally realized that Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation was in fact a sinister demon appearing only to me, and her true demonic name was: Legume Allergy"
we've definitely posted about this before but if i see one more person act like the only forms of childhood trauma that exist are abuse from family or sexual assault i will actually start crying and it will be so so so loud everyone will hear it from every corner of the earth
THE SCHOOL SYSTEM !!! PEER ABUSE !!!!! ISOLATION !!!!!!!! RACISM !!! SEXISM !!!!!! MEDICAL ABUSE !!!!!! NONCONSENSUAL SURGERY !!!! POVERTY !!!! SO MUCH MORE !!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
edit: i made this in a high school enduced rage and didnt expect it to blow up like this ?
anyway i love trans people i love intersex people i love people with personality disorsers i love aspec people okkk
i love these lines so much it's like one of the few times Tenna talks out of his stage persona character. hashtag his bitchiness. hashtag his passive aggression. do you think his internal monologue is like this
and then this one is from the bonus round board that got cut from chap 3. 🫵 SELF CENSORSHIP EVIDENCE
it's so weird how every character in deltarune engages you in fights and throws bullets at you and KO's you, but only tenna is so consistently singled out not only as being "violent", but specifically being criticized for fighting the fun gang and needing to like, apologize and feel guilty about it. like ok should we make lancer apologize for beating us up 3 different times. should we throw a party. should we invite spamton
do i think he'd feel bad about it? maybe! should he? brother it's a fighting rpg it's the MEDIUM. it's the same reason people in musicals break out into song - it's the lens for expressing story and emotions and character motivations etc etc etc. literally everyone in the game starts a battle with you. should we get queen to apologize for playing punch-out
ok no actually i was gonna leave this in the tags but why the fuck is it always spamton doing the morality criticism too. spamton g spamton who corners kris by themselves multiple times in efforts to Specifically take their soul from them in a way no other character ever does, who is one of the few things in the game to make kris back away without our input - like why are people so obsessed with HIM having some moral high ground that he uses to Call Out His Hysterical Bitch Of An Ex-Wif- I Mean Husband Who Needs To Learn His Place And Endlessly Repent For His Evil Sins Against Everyone Because He'll Never Learn Otherwise. i feel fucking crazy where am i
watched three girls who reblogged its new blog mutual aidpost (made literally 15 minutes ago) already disappear from its notifs. transfems are not included in their pride :/
