We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... We must do that which we think we cannot.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
------------------------------
Tonya | Leo | INFJ | Dreamer
I promise you my brain is as eclectic as my page. Here you'll find all kinds of things I enjoy, my photography and memes and whatever else ends up here. I also play both the flute and the clarinet. I'm overly nice to a fault so be kind. I love you, each and everyone one of you.
Disclaimer: I am not Emilie Nereng nor am I affiliated with her or her blog in any way. She is a cutie which is why I decided to use her as my mascot.
Anyone interested in joining a Hunger Games rpg? We’re a small group looking for a couple of more people. Play a tribute, mentor, stylist, escort! I can always point you in the right direction!
The famous Nyhavn canal in Copenhagen, Denmark, the Round Church which is modeled after St. Peter’s in Rome (which it certainly looks like!), and the residence/palace of the Danish royal family.
Oslo Cathedral, Tivoli Gardens in Copenhagen Denmark which is the world’s oldest amusement park and the inspiration behind Disney Land, and one of the Danish palaces.
Norway part 2. Norwegian boat houses aka old bathing houses, the fortress which has never been occupied in it’s 1200 year history by a foreign power, room where the Nobel Peace Prize is awarded, and the view from Vigeland sculpture park in Oslo, Norway.
This year for my birthday, I’m thankful for everyone in my life. All you included! You have seen me through the hardest times and shared the joy of the happy times. I love you. Each and every one of you. Here is for another year!
I know I’ve been absent a lot this summer and there’s a reason for that, latent TB. First, it is not active TB. There is no getting sick or making other people sick. Most healthy people who come in contact with TB don’t get sick; you become essentially a carrier and can potentially sick later in life. I feel like this is the thing I get asked the most. Even my own family doesn’t want to be around me because they think I am contagious. It makes it tough dealing with the medicines, being sick from the meds, ect. All because my college program requires health care workers to have a TB test upon entering.
But I want people to know what it’s like to get treated for latent TB. The struggles, what it entails, my experiences, ect because one in three people in the entire world are infected with latent TB. There is a lot I wish I knew before making the decisions about treatment. It is also lonely having to deal with a lot of this alone and it’s nice to get it off my chest.
First of all, probably not the best to mention it to other people or make sure it is to people you trust. Because I lack a support system at home, I found myself talking to my classmates (all future health care professionals) about our PPD tests, aka the skin test most people get done for TB. There is also a blood test called interferon assay. My professor overheard us and turned me into the college. Now, a doctor will do a chest x-ray if they even suspect a positive PPD test. That is the ultimate test for TB because it will show on the lungs. There was never any worry I was contagious, but people freak out and they KICKED ME OUT OF COLLEGE! Two days before finals. I was literally on the verge of losing everything I’d work for, all the money I spent on classes, because I couldn’t finish my classes. I got threatened with loss of my financial aid and my admissions to my graduate program for medical technology. It was a lot of stress and paperwork on top of being scared I had TB. No one hears about TB in the United States, so that was a little scary because there isn’t a lot of information out there.
PPD test positive? Usually, no need to worry because there are a lot of things that can interfere with it. The vaccine. Autoimmune problems. My allergic reaction to the stuff used was so bad, I had to get steroid shots and be on oral steroids for two weeks. On top of the itching and pain initially felt from the injection under the skin. It was because of the allergic reaction I had to get the blood test.
I have to admit, it was scary to go to the health department clinic. It’s outdated and that’s only the place people go when they have HIV (stereotypes and so not true). I have to say the nurses were great. It was pretty much an hour of answering questions, a quick physical exam, check of vitals, and finding out information about TB. I also had to get paperwork to send the college so I could go back and take my finals (six weeks after classes ended) and have the needed paperwork to send to my graduate program, so I could attend classes there.
The medicine is the worse part. To be fair, you don’t have to take the treatment. I however have bad asthma and cannot afford to catch TB. Like getting shingles from a previous chickenpox infection, TB can “activate” later in life. Just because you’re symptom free and healthy now doesn’t mean you stay that way for life. Besides, it’s a couple antibiotics once a week for a few weeks. Not bad, right? For most people, it’s not.
For me, however, the medicine has been the worse part. The two antibiotics are very strong, INH and rifampin. You also have to take B12, a vitamin, to help with the possible neurological side effects (which I haven’t had). There are diet restrictions, certain foods and absolutely no alcohol. You cannot take over the counter pain meds because the liver is already taxed enough by the antibiotics. You also have to be observed taking them so you have to go to the doctors every week or have a nurse come to you.
The migraines I got from the meds were crippling for DAYS. There were weeks I could curl up in a ball, hold my head, and sob. That was when I wasn’t constantly vomiting. I couldn’t eat, sleep, or function. The circles around my eyes were darker than a racoon’s. It would start on Thursday night (I got my meds Thursday afternoon) and I wouldn’t start to recover till Monday. By the time I felt better it was time to get more medicine. I was in so much pain I begged people to shoot me and refused to take the meds. Not an option. Six weeks into the 12, I have had to have my medicine dose cut back and added an anti-vomiting pill to the 10 pills I am currently taking.
Anyhow, yeah... TB isn’t fun. I don’t even know how I feel about it and the treatment. Part of me wishes I didn’t take the meds. Part of me hates my professor for turning me in and letting the school dictate my medical choices or be kicked out for good. I don’t agree with anyone making anyone’s choices for them as far as their health goes. I have great nurses though taking care of me and helping to try and make the med situation better. I keep telling myself it’ll get better and I’ll be stronger because of it.
May has really been an awful month. Just one thing after another. One stressful situation after another. I think I’ve lost 15 pds because of the stress. I didn’t think I could feel this sad and frustrated again, but alas, I do. I know I’m stronger than this but it just feels so final sometimes. I wish life had a pause button sometimes so you could deal with problems and sadness before being handed another dose.
I know I can do it. This sadness doesn’t define me. It is not who I am. It’ll get better. June is only a week away!
romaincrisis
titsay
germansingergirl
snowghoul
dededos
blakekathryn
annaxmalina
areudirty
pixelskylines
