Something Wicked This Way Comes

[mammondark]

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh, hey boys! One sec, let me just...

Multi opens the door to meet Benny and this new Jenkins he's never seen before with a grin.

Hi, Benny; hey... I don't know your name, actually.

[mammondark]

Oh, well sir you can call me Smart. A pleasure to meet you. -S.J.

Okay, can it egghead. He's not into you, he wants the old man. Speaking of which. -Ben.J.

Benny steps aside and motions to a large, cardboard box about the size and shape of a coffin.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh... oh dear...

Multi takes a second to breathe, hands on his hips as he stares at the box.

Okay... when VonKraft said body, he meant body... fuck, okay. Either of you mind helping me carry him inside? I don't want to drop him.

[mammondark]

Oh yeah, no probs toots. -Ben.J.

I... suppose. -S.J.

The two Jenkins copies take both ends of the cardboard casket and lift is slowly.

Just tell us where you want the old man. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

We'll have to see if I have the space...

Multi leads the two down into the bunker, trying not to make it too obvious that he is anxious out of his mind. The main space is small and definitely not prepared for a coffin-sized box, but after pushing around the furniture some, there's just enough.

Okay, let's set him down.

[mammondark]

One... two... -S.J.

Three! -Ben.J.

The two set him down gently, but then end up falling on their asses and just sit there for a second.

Old man weighs a ton! Must be all that coffee or something... -S.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi chuckles at that.

Maybe. Thanks, you two.

He stares at the box for a few moments, letting the two breathe. That's Jenkins in there. His dead body, in a cardboard box, in his living room. He's definitely supposed to probably do something...

What the heck do I do now?

[mammondark]

Oh, the old man only goes back into his body when you evoke the names of the Lords in Black. -S.J.

... From the uh... the musical. You know. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Huh. That is... incredibly specific, what the fuck? But also very on brand. Hold on, let me grab my phone...

Multi walks into the kitchen and comes back with his phone in hand, already pulled up to the Genius Lyrics page for The Summoning, and a little Tupperware enclosure he made for Jenkin's soul under his arm. There's air holes poked into the lid and an old potholder being used for cushioning, with the soul curled up on top.

He sits down beside the box, enclosure set between his crossed legs.

Is he picky about pronunciation?

[mammondark]

Not at all. -S.J.

If he did, VonKraft would never be able to get him back in his body. -Ben. J.

The two slowly make their way over to the door, giving Multi the room he needs to do the summoning using The Summoning.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh, hey boys! One sec, let me just...

Multi opens the door to meet Benny and this new Jenkins he's never seen before with a grin.

Hi, Benny; hey... I don't know your name, actually.

[mammondark]

Oh, well sir you can call me Smart. A pleasure to meet you. -S.J.

Okay, can it egghead. He's not into you, he wants the old man. Speaking of which. -Ben.J.

Benny steps aside and motions to a large, cardboard box about the size and shape of a coffin.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh... oh dear...

Multi takes a second to breathe, hands on his hips as he stares at the box.

Okay... when VonKraft said body, he meant body... fuck, okay. Either of you mind helping me carry him inside? I don't want to drop him.

[mammondark]

Oh yeah, no probs toots. -Ben.J.

I... suppose. -S.J.

The two Jenkins copies take both ends of the cardboard casket and lift is slowly.

Just tell us where you want the old man. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

We'll have to see if I have the space...

Multi leads the two down into the bunker, trying not to make it too obvious that he is anxious out of his mind. The main space is small and definitely not prepared for a coffin-sized box, but after pushing around the furniture some, there's just enough.

Okay, let's set him down.

[mammondark]

One... two... -S.J.

Three! -Ben.J.

The two set him down gently, but then end up falling on their asses and just sit there for a second.

Old man weighs a ton! Must be all that coffee or something... -S.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi chuckles at that.

Maybe. Thanks, you two.

He stares at the box for a few moments, letting the two breathe. That's Jenkins in there. His dead body, in a cardboard box, in his living room. He's definitely supposed to probably do something...

What the heck do I do now?

[mammondark]

Oh, the old man only goes back into his body when you evoke the names of the Lords in Black. -S.J.

... From the uh... the musical. You know. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh, hey boys! One sec, let me just...

Multi opens the door to meet Benny and this new Jenkins he's never seen before with a grin.

Hi, Benny; hey... I don't know your name, actually.

[mammondark]

Oh, well sir you can call me Smart. A pleasure to meet you. -S.J.

Okay, can it egghead. He's not into you, he wants the old man. Speaking of which. -Ben.J.

Benny steps aside and motions to a large, cardboard box about the size and shape of a coffin.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh... oh dear...

Multi takes a second to breathe, hands on his hips as he stares at the box.

Okay... when VonKraft said body, he meant body... fuck, okay. Either of you mind helping me carry him inside? I don't want to drop him.

[mammondark]

Oh yeah, no probs toots. -Ben.J.

I... suppose. -S.J.

The two Jenkins copies take both ends of the cardboard casket and lift is slowly.

Just tell us where you want the old man. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

We'll have to see if I have the space...

Multi leads the two down into the bunker, trying not to make it too obvious that he is anxious out of his mind. The main space is small and definitely not prepared for a coffin-sized box, but after pushing around the furniture some, there's just enough.

Okay, let's set him down.

[mammondark]

One... two... -S.J.

Three! -Ben.J.

The two set him down gently, but then end up falling on their asses and just sit there for a second.

Old man weighs a ton! Must be all that coffee or something... -S.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh, hey boys! One sec, let me just...

Multi opens the door to meet Benny and this new Jenkins he's never seen before with a grin.

Hi, Benny; hey... I don't know your name, actually.

[mammondark]

Oh, well sir you can call me Smart. A pleasure to meet you. -S.J.

Okay, can it egghead. He's not into you, he wants the old man. Speaking of which. -Ben.J.

Benny steps aside and motions to a large, cardboard box about the size and shape of a coffin.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh... oh dear...

Multi takes a second to breathe, hands on his hips as he stares at the box.

Okay... when VonKraft said body, he meant body... fuck, okay. Either of you mind helping me carry him inside? I don't want to drop him.

[mammondark]

Oh yeah, no probs toots. -Ben.J.

I... suppose. -S.J.

The two Jenkins copies take both ends of the cardboard casket and lift is slowly.

Just tell us where you want the old man. -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Oh, hey boys! One sec, let me just...

Multi opens the door to meet Benny and this new Jenkins he's never seen before with a grin.

Hi, Benny; hey... I don't know your name, actually.

[mammondark]

Oh, well sir you can call me Smart. A pleasure to meet you. -S.J.

Okay, can it egghead. He's not into you, he wants the old man. Speaking of which. -Ben.J.

Benny steps aside and motions to a large, cardboard box about the size and shape of a coffin.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

There's a pounding on the door to Paradise 2.0, it sounds like a heavy fist pounding at the door over and over again.

... Who the hell...?

Multi walks up to the door, slightly annoyed at the intrusion. He doesn't open the door, but he does press the button to the intercom attached to it.

Hello? Who is it?

[mammondark]

Delivery for a Mr. Multitude. -S.J.

Hey toots, how's it shaking? -Ben.J.

[mammondark]

The gold Morris paid has already tripled in value thanks to my investment!

... I still wish I had gotten that rival coffee chain, I feel like even with the grudge held against us we could've turned a profit against Lucifer's Evil Tim Hortons.

I hear there's a Denny's on the ninth layer ... Perchance I'll buy out an IHOP. AHAH! AHAH! AHAH!

[mammondark]

So... How long do you think until Lucifer's brat figures out you tried to sell Hell?

Successfully sold Hell, Mr. Marshall. And I doubt it'll take long, though I doubt there's much she can do outside of trying to throw me into the Torment Nexus.

Trying? You don't think she can get you in there, sir?

You misunderstand me, Mr. Carter. I fully expect her to get me in there... And then she'll figure out why I've been in business for so long. However, she's also level headed. Sparing her family will probably temper her ire quite a bit.

And... The Jenkins issue?

Oh yes... The Jenkins Issue. I believe I already have a solution. Oh Belphagor!

Yes, Lord Mammon?

You wouldn't mind being the new basis of our staff?

Of course, sir.

Very good, thank you Belphagor. Anything else?

The matter of Herald VonKraft is...

Oh he's fired, ten times fired, one hundred times fired!

I have to agree with Mr. Marshall. Thought we successfully sold Hell, Mr. VonKraft put his own selfless desires ahead of the company's bottom line. There's a possibility that if he has assisted with the evacuation it would've ended smoothly. As of now, Herald VonKraft is no longer an associate of Marshall, Carter and Dark.

[disco-afterparty]

From one of the many miraculously appearing black doors, into the MC&D building is Multitude, transformed into a form The Devil hasn't seen before; black ash creeping further up his arms and legs; outfit tattered like it had been burned in the flames of his transformation, his flaming hair longer and clinging to his back like fur; his eyes a burning white...

His gaze lands on Da Devil, and he grins.

Hey, figured I'd find you here! Glad to see you left the place in one peice for me.

The Devil dropped the pipe a while ago, standing in an empty building, thinking of what he has to do next. Then a voice he doesn’t register immediately as familiar chimes up behind him.

He suddenly spins to quickly face him, not hesitating to extend his hand and erect a red spike from the ground, aiming for his chest. It’s fast but can be dodged if Multi is quick enough.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

And Multi is quick enough, jumping out the way with barely a yep.

Are you seriously THAT pissed about me following you?!

[disco-afterparty]

Who are you?

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi stands there confused before snapping his fingers together in realization.

Oooh, right, you weren't there for the... hi, yeah, it's Multitude. You like the new form? Hurt like a bitch to transform into, but it's built to cause a lot of damage, so I made the sacrifice.

[disco-afterparty]

As he explains, his brow furrows. He lowers his hand and the spike disappears into mist.

… What the fuck are you doing here? I told you to stay behind.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

I already told you why - this Dark guy is threatening my home, kidnapped my boyfriend, and is overall a total jerk. I want to help take him down!

[disco-afterparty]

You CANT. You dont even know what youre getting into - you dont know the kind of demon Mammon is!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

He's the leader of Greed, isn't he? Super powerful, super scary? I'm a literal ex-solider from Heaven, I know things!

[disco-afterparty]

But do you know what hes done? Worse than me for sure!

Do you even have a plan? Do you know what youre doing?!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Yeah - get to his office, see if I can't intimidate some information out of him and if that doesn't work, I start setting things on fire until he talks! Do YOU have a plan?

[disco-afterparty]

Thats fucking garbage and youre going to die.

Yeah. Im gonna get in there and KILL HIM IMMEDIATELY.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Okay, and when you do, do you have ANY clue where to find The Mayor after? Or Jenkins? Swatch? Bunny? Because they were all kidnapped, put in cages, and are SOMEWHERE in this building - and the guy who probably knows where they are is Dark. But he'll be dead. Because you killed them. Are you seriously going to spend hours combing through this building to find them?

Or, simpler route, we cut the searching time by having Dark tell us where they are and THEN kill him!

[disco-afterparty]

I CAN FIND THEM MYSELF. BY MYSELF.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

You are so stubborn... do you even know where Dark's office is?

[disco-afterparty]

I know his scent. I can sniff him out easy.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

No need, because I already know! It's upstairs, we take a left at the hall with the pink diamonds. Aren't I so helpful?

Multi starts walking towards the stairs, seemingly undeterred by The Devil's insistence.

[disco-afterparty]

He doesn’t say anything as Multi starts to walk away…

Because he’s already gone. The description was enough for The Devil to just teleport there without him. Honestly, he probably should’ve figured he’d be in his office…

[mammondark]

Mr. Dark sits at a desk made of ivory and bone in the Greed Layer, the office around him made of thick walls of pink diamond, his chair seeming to be made of the hide of some extinct animal, and as he signs off on some paperwork he looks up and smirks.

Well well... Hello there, Devil.

[disco-afterparty]

Once The Devil appears, and he’s gotten a good look at the room, he hovers forward closer to Mammon with little hesitation…

And punches him straight across the face.

[mammondark]

Mammon leans back as the punch lands, then slowly turns to face The Devil.

... A fine howdy-doo to you too then. Now, if you'd please.

Mr. Dark snaps his fingers and a pair of chairs made of rhino leather erupts from the floor near the Devil, another snap and @sailor-guardian-multitude is teleported into the room.

Take a seat, please.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi looks around to quickly realize where he is, and when his eyes land on Mammon, his posture turns defensive, eyes narrow.

Hi, yeah, no, I think I'll stand. My hair will definitely set fire to your... very interesting choice of chair, and I don't tend to lead conversations with arson.

[disco-afterparty]

The Devil snaps his fingers and both chairs erupt into flames. He stays upright, keeping his eyes trained on Mammon. He doesn’t even glance at Multi.

Where are they.

[mammondark]

Where are who? You'll need to be more specific, since I have a few different things going on right now, D.

Mr. Dark leans back in his chair, tossing his tophat onto the desk.

[disco-afterparty]

He slams a fist down on the desk and it cracks down the middle.

YOU KNOW WHO.

[toplawyermc-d]

... Are you trying to be intimidating? In my own domain?

Dark starts to laugh, it sounds nasally and condescending as he stands.

Fine, I know who you're talking about... But I'm not telling you where they are.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi takes a deep breath, stepping forward. His hair burns brighter as he struggles not to set the entire office ablaze. He speak through a gritted smile.

What. Do you mean. You aren't. Telling us?

[mammondark]

I mean that I'm not going to tell you, and if you don't want to be bald again for the next few years I suggest you calm down.

Mammon walks around the desk and waves his hand, a small table with a chess game appearing. He then pushes the table over, making it turn into a roulette wheel.

Ah, much better. Now, we're going to make a little trade. It's simple: You give me something, and I'll call the auction off.

[disco-afterparty]

He watches him carefully, never taking his eye off Mammon for even a second.

Whatever you want, I doubt it’s reasonable, so no.

[mammondark]

Then you'll have to find a new home, won't you? I'm sure your boyfriend's daughter will be thrilled to learn how you and the fallen angel here lost Hell because you wouldn't even listen to what one of the Lords of Hell wanted to get instead.

Sure, she'll come after me... but she doesn't have a standard for me... She'll probably end up blowing up at you, and who'll get in the crossfire?

[disco-afterparty]

He glares at him, seemingly unperturbed by the threats. But he doesn’t bite back this time.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi notices The Devil's silence and, after a moment of calming down his boiling rage, decides to inquire further.

How do we know you're going to honor your side of the deal, exactly? It's not like you're known for playing by the honor system.

[mammondark]

True, but let's just say I don't really want to sell off Hell. This was mostly just a way to get a foot hold a bit deeper in, ensure that I can have my eyes and ears where they're needed.

After all, Hell switches rulers like Taylor Swift used to switch boyfriends. So... My offer is simple. I want to put a few things into Yaoi Central: a law office and a competitor to my... brother? Cousin? To Lucifer's Evil Tim Hortons. Just a little claim to stake in the up and coming community of Yaoi Central.

[disco-afterparty]

No.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Devil, your haggling sucks.

Multi takes another deep breath, moving his flaming bangs out of his face so he can look Mammon in the eyes better.

A law office and an Evil Tim Horton's competitor? Okay, let's play along.

I can do for you the land in the surrounding swamp of Yaoi Central for a MC&D law office and a not-Tim Horton's, in exchange for Hell being put off the auction forever and a clue as to where our friends and my boyfriend are being held. If it's a good clue, I can probably get your not-Tim Horton's on the train station - who doesn't want to buy a coffee for their morning commute? You'd get better buisness there than you would from the very bitter and very grudge-holdy citizens of Yaoi Central.

[mammondark]

Hmmm... that is true, plus that's a market that Evil Tim Hortons doesn't have access to...

Very well! I accept the terms of your deal! Shall we shake on it, Multitude?

Mammon pulls the glove off his hand, revealing a clawed, dark, scaled hand that looks much like a normal demons.

[disco-afterparty]

No. We’re not haggling because this isn’t -

He smacks Mammon’s gross hand away, getting in front of Multitude and taking him firmly by the shoulders.

Do NOT make a deal with this guy. Never make a deal with anyone like him.

Listen to me… We can do this without him. We can figure this out without causing more problems.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multitude looks over Devil's shoulder to do his best 'I'm so sorry about this' look to Mammon before looking back to him.

He knows where our friends are, he has our home hostage, and clearly you failed to kill him on sight cause he's still alive! So, what choice do we have? What's your plan?

[disco-afterparty]

I didnt try to kill him, i just punched him in the face!

We kill him by distracting him, by destroying something he needs. Something he cant get back.

[mammondark]

You all know that whatever I have I can just buy back right? Money is power after all.

[disco-afterparty]

He looks back at Mammon and shoves his face away from them in disgust. He turns back to the fellow demon and straightens up with a huff.

FINE. You want a deal?

Let’s make a deal.

He snaps his fingers, and next to him appears crimson parchment paper and a quill ready with black ink, both hovering and ready to get to work on their own.

What are your stipulations?

[mammondark]

My stipulations! Well I'm happy to sta-... To Star... Sniff sniff... One moment.

Mammon sinks into the diamonds his realm is made of.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

A moment. Perfect. Just a moment might be what they need. Because Multi's forming a plan... a really bad, really scary, really gonna get him in trouble plan.

Dee, do you know what a jar full of souls might look like?

[disco-afterparty]

He tries not to let his anger get the best of him until Multi speaks. He turns back to him, squinting suspiciously.

Yeah… I used to have one when i was a kid.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Part of Jenkins' deal with Mammon was protecting his Soul Jar. It's really important, it's the way Mammon makes all those clones and keeps them alive after they die - those Jenkins hold this buisness on their backs... and if it breaks...

Multi's breathing shakes a little bit. He clearly does not like this plan but also knows it might be their best shot. You can't exactly buy back souls, right?

... if Mammon's job is to protect the jar, don't you think his office is the safest place to put it?

[disco-afterparty]

He thinks for a moment, clearly hating this plan… But he sighs and closes his eyes anyway, his third still open as he did with Marshall before.

All he needs to think for this to work is Jenkins.

[toplawyermc-d]

Through the Devil's weird third sight, it doesn't take long to find a small jar with a single floating soul in it. It's pulsing with magical energy and it's... right under Multi's feet, embedded in 10 feet of pure pink diamond.

[disco-afterparty]

Once he spots it, he blinks his eyes open, looking to Multi.

… Youre standing on your boyfriend right now.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

... I'd say that's romantic if this situation was anything else.

Multi takes another deep breath. Diamonds melt at 7,280°F... he can reach 7,280°F. He can do this. He's gotta do this. There's no other choice. He lifts his foot, encompassing it in bright green, raging fire, and then slams it down - melting a path through the floor, to the jar.

[disco-afterparty]

… What?

He watches Multi do… whatever that was, then scoots him out of the way so he can reach down and grab the jar.

Is that new?

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

The ability to melt diamonds? No, I learned that forever ago... just never had a reason to use it.

Multi pauses, staring at jar. That's Jenkins', basically. His entire essence, in a single jar. A single jar they might have to break to save their home...

Do you know what happens when a Soul Jar breaks? Besides potentially pissing off an evil capitalist?

[disco-afterparty]

No, i mean the… Never mind.

He looks down at the jar, staring at the little essence of life inside, nervously skittering around like it doesn’t know what’s going on.

The Devil doesn’t answer him. He throws the jar directly on the ground with a loud shatter.

[mammondark]

Suddenly, Dark reappears, cackling like a mad man before he turns and sees the scene before him.

... W-what? What have...

... WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

[disco-afterparty]

He watches the soul as it settles on the ground, still quivering, frightened. He doesn’t pay any mind to Mammon at all as he leans down to gently scoop Jenkins up in his hands.

Sorry, little guy… Had to get you out fast. Its okay, shhhh shhshh…

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

While The Devil handles Jenkins, Multi decides to go for the throat. He snarls and jumps at Mammon, the flames bursting over his body in a protective coating; legs coated in firey fur with his feet morphed into paws, nails sharp with flaming claws, head shifted and masked to one of a monstrous hare - as he tackles the demon to the ground with his hands aiming to wrap around his neck.

[mammondark]

As soon as Multi's hands get around Mammon's neck he shatters into pink diamond, a new body immediately stepping out of a wall.

YOU BROKE A CONTRACT! ONE OF MY OLDEST!

GET... OUT!

Mammon snaps his fingers, forcing Multi, the Devil, and Jenkins' soul out of Green and back into Muppet Superhell.

... Now I'll have to replace my entire auxilery staff...

... Oh well! AHAH! AHAH!

Time to get to work!

[disco-afterparty]

From one of the many miraculously appearing black doors, into the MC&D building is Multitude, transformed into a form The Devil hasn't seen before; black ash creeping further up his arms and legs; outfit tattered like it had been burned in the flames of his transformation, his flaming hair longer and clinging to his back like fur; his eyes a burning white...

His gaze lands on Da Devil, and he grins.

Hey, figured I'd find you here! Glad to see you left the place in one peice for me.

The Devil dropped the pipe a while ago, standing in an empty building, thinking of what he has to do next. Then a voice he doesn’t register immediately as familiar chimes up behind him.

He suddenly spins to quickly face him, not hesitating to extend his hand and erect a red spike from the ground, aiming for his chest. It’s fast but can be dodged if Multi is quick enough.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

And Multi is quick enough, jumping out the way with barely a yep.

Are you seriously THAT pissed about me following you?!

[disco-afterparty]

Who are you?

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi stands there confused before snapping his fingers together in realization.

Oooh, right, you weren't there for the... hi, yeah, it's Multitude. You like the new form? Hurt like a bitch to transform into, but it's built to cause a lot of damage, so I made the sacrifice.

[disco-afterparty]

As he explains, his brow furrows. He lowers his hand and the spike disappears into mist.

… What the fuck are you doing here? I told you to stay behind.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

I already told you why - this Dark guy is threatening my home, kidnapped my boyfriend, and is overall a total jerk. I want to help take him down!

[disco-afterparty]

You CANT. You dont even know what youre getting into - you dont know the kind of demon Mammon is!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

He's the leader of Greed, isn't he? Super powerful, super scary? I'm a literal ex-solider from Heaven, I know things!

[disco-afterparty]

But do you know what hes done? Worse than me for sure!

Do you even have a plan? Do you know what youre doing?!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Yeah - get to his office, see if I can't intimidate some information out of him and if that doesn't work, I start setting things on fire until he talks! Do YOU have a plan?

[disco-afterparty]

Thats fucking garbage and youre going to die.

Yeah. Im gonna get in there and KILL HIM IMMEDIATELY.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Okay, and when you do, do you have ANY clue where to find The Mayor after? Or Jenkins? Swatch? Bunny? Because they were all kidnapped, put in cages, and are SOMEWHERE in this building - and the guy who probably knows where they are is Dark. But he'll be dead. Because you killed them. Are you seriously going to spend hours combing through this building to find them?

Or, simpler route, we cut the searching time by having Dark tell us where they are and THEN kill him!

[disco-afterparty]

I CAN FIND THEM MYSELF. BY MYSELF.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

You are so stubborn... do you even know where Dark's office is?

[disco-afterparty]

I know his scent. I can sniff him out easy.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

No need, because I already know! It's upstairs, we take a left at the hall with the pink diamonds. Aren't I so helpful?

Multi starts walking towards the stairs, seemingly undeterred by The Devil's insistence.

[disco-afterparty]

He doesn’t say anything as Multi starts to walk away…

Because he’s already gone. The description was enough for The Devil to just teleport there without him. Honestly, he probably should’ve figured he’d be in his office…

[mammondark]

Mr. Dark sits at a desk made of ivory and bone in the Greed Layer, the office around him made of thick walls of pink diamond, his chair seeming to be made of the hide of some extinct animal, and as he signs off on some paperwork he looks up and smirks.

Well well... Hello there, Devil.

[disco-afterparty]

Once The Devil appears, and he’s gotten a good look at the room, he hovers forward closer to Mammon with little hesitation…

And punches him straight across the face.

[mammondark]

Mammon leans back as the punch lands, then slowly turns to face The Devil.

... A fine howdy-doo to you too then. Now, if you'd please.

Mr. Dark snaps his fingers and a pair of chairs made of rhino leather erupts from the floor near the Devil, another snap and @sailor-guardian-multitude is teleported into the room.

Take a seat, please.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi looks around to quickly realize where he is, and when his eyes land on Mammon, his posture turns defensive, eyes narrow.

Hi, yeah, no, I think I'll stand. My hair will definitely set fire to your... very interesting choice of chair, and I don't tend to lead conversations with arson.

[disco-afterparty]

The Devil snaps his fingers and both chairs erupt into flames. He stays upright, keeping his eyes trained on Mammon. He doesn’t even glance at Multi.

Where are they.

[mammondark]

Where are who? You'll need to be more specific, since I have a few different things going on right now, D.

Mr. Dark leans back in his chair, tossing his tophat onto the desk.

[disco-afterparty]

He slams a fist down on the desk and it cracks down the middle.

YOU KNOW WHO.

[toplawyermc-d]

... Are you trying to be intimidating? In my own domain?

Dark starts to laugh, it sounds nasally and condescending as he stands.

Fine, I know who you're talking about... But I'm not telling you where they are.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi takes a deep breath, stepping forward. His hair burns brighter as he struggles not to set the entire office ablaze. He speak through a gritted smile.

What. Do you mean. You aren't. Telling us?

[mammondark]

I mean that I'm not going to tell you, and if you don't want to be bald again for the next few years I suggest you calm down.

Mammon walks around the desk and waves his hand, a small table with a chess game appearing. He then pushes the table over, making it turn into a roulette wheel.

Ah, much better. Now, we're going to make a little trade. It's simple: You give me something, and I'll call the auction off.

[disco-afterparty]

He watches him carefully, never taking his eye off Mammon for even a second.

Whatever you want, I doubt it’s reasonable, so no.

[mammondark]

Then you'll have to find a new home, won't you? I'm sure your boyfriend's daughter will be thrilled to learn how you and the fallen angel here lost Hell because you wouldn't even listen to what one of the Lords of Hell wanted to get instead.

Sure, she'll come after me... but she doesn't have a standard for me... She'll probably end up blowing up at you, and who'll get in the crossfire?

[disco-afterparty]

He glares at him, seemingly unperturbed by the threats. But he doesn’t bite back this time.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi notices The Devil's silence and, after a moment of calming down his boiling rage, decides to inquire further.

How do we know you're going to honor your side of the deal, exactly? It's not like you're known for playing by the honor system.

[mammondark]

True, but let's just say I don't really want to sell off Hell. This was mostly just a way to get a foot hold a bit deeper in, ensure that I can have my eyes and ears where they're needed.

After all, Hell switches rulers like Taylor Swift used to switch boyfriends. So... My offer is simple. I want to put a few things into Yaoi Central: a law office and a competitor to my... brother? Cousin? To Lucifer's Evil Tim Hortons. Just a little claim to stake in the up and coming community of Yaoi Central.

[disco-afterparty]

No.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Devil, your haggling sucks.

Multi takes another deep breath, moving his flaming bangs out of his face so he can look Mammon in the eyes better.

A law office and an Evil Tim Horton's competitor? Okay, let's play along.

I can do for you the land in the surrounding swamp of Yaoi Central for a MC&D law office and a not-Tim Horton's, in exchange for Hell being put off the auction forever and a clue as to where our friends and my boyfriend are being held. If it's a good clue, I can probably get your not-Tim Horton's on the train station - who doesn't want to buy a coffee for their morning commute? You'd get better buisness there than you would from the very bitter and very grudge-holdy citizens of Yaoi Central.

[mammondark]

Hmmm... that is true, plus that's a market that Evil Tim Hortons doesn't have access to...

Very well! I accept the terms of your deal! Shall we shake on it, Multitude?

Mammon pulls the glove off his hand, revealing a clawed, dark, scaled hand that looks much like a normal demons.

[disco-afterparty]

No. We’re not haggling because this isn’t -

He smacks Mammon’s gross hand away, getting in front of Multitude and taking him firmly by the shoulders.

Do NOT make a deal with this guy. Never make a deal with anyone like him.

Listen to me… We can do this without him. We can figure this out without causing more problems.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multitude looks over Devil's shoulder to do his best 'I'm so sorry about this' look to Mammon before looking back to him.

He knows where our friends are, he has our home hostage, and clearly you failed to kill him on sight cause he's still alive! So, what choice do we have? What's your plan?

[disco-afterparty]

I didnt try to kill him, i just punched him in the face!

We kill him by distracting him, by destroying something he needs. Something he cant get back.

[mammondark]

You all know that whatever I have I can just buy back right? Money is power after all.

[disco-afterparty]

He looks back at Mammon and shoves his face away from them in disgust. He turns back to the fellow demon and straightens up with a huff.

FINE. You want a deal?

Let’s make a deal.

He snaps his fingers, and next to him appears crimson parchment paper and a quill ready with black ink, both hovering and ready to get to work on their own.

What are your stipulations?

[mammondark]

My stipulations! Well I'm happy to sta-... To Star... Sniff sniff... One moment.

Mammon sinks into the diamonds his realm is made of.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

A moment. Perfect. Just a moment might be what they need. Because Multi's forming a plan... a really bad, really scary, really gonna get him in trouble plan.

Dee, do you know what a jar full of souls might look like?

[disco-afterparty]

He tries not to let his anger get the best of him until Multi speaks. He turns back to him, squinting suspiciously.

Yeah… I used to have one when i was a kid.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Part of Jenkins' deal with Mammon was protecting his Soul Jar. It's really important, it's the way Mammon makes all those clones and keeps them alive after they die - those Jenkins hold this buisness on their backs... and if it breaks...

Multi's breathing shakes a little bit. He clearly does not like this plan but also knows it might be their best shot. You can't exactly buy back souls, right?

... if Mammon's job is to protect the jar, don't you think his office is the safest place to put it?

[disco-afterparty]

He thinks for a moment, clearly hating this plan… But he sighs and closes his eyes anyway, his third still open as he did with Marshall before.

All he needs to think for this to work is Jenkins.

[toplawyermc-d]

Through the Devil's weird third sight, it doesn't take long to find a small jar with a single floating soul in it. It's pulsing with magical energy and it's... right under Multi's feet, embedded in 10 feet of pure pink diamond.

[disco-afterparty]

Once he spots it, he blinks his eyes open, looking to Multi.

… Youre standing on your boyfriend right now.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

... I'd say that's romantic if this situation was anything else.

Multi takes another deep breath. Diamonds melt at 7,280°F... he can reach 7,280°F. He can do this. He's gotta do this. There's no other choice. He lifts his foot, encompassing it in bright green, raging fire, and then slams it down - melting a path through the floor, to the jar.

[disco-afterparty]

… What?

He watches Multi do… whatever that was, then scoots him out of the way so he can reach down and grab the jar.

Is that new?

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

The ability to melt diamonds? No, I learned that forever ago... just never had a reason to use it.

Multi pauses, staring at jar. That's Jenkins', basically. His entire essence, in a single jar. A single jar they might have to break to save their home...

Do you know what happens when a Soul Jar breaks? Besides potentially pissing off an evil capitalist?

[disco-afterparty]

No, i mean the… Never mind.

He looks down at the jar, staring at the little essence of life inside, nervously skittering around like it doesn’t know what’s going on.

The Devil doesn’t answer him. He throws the jar directly on the ground with a loud shatter.

[mammondark]

Suddenly, Dark reappears, cackling like a mad man before he turns and sees the scene before him.

... W-what? What have...

... WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

[mammondark]

Congratulations to @macaroni-racoon for their purchase of Hell at this seasons final auction!

At their behest, Hell shall remain where it is.

Thank you for taking part in this years auction seasons, Muppet Superhell.

We here at Marshall, Carter, and Dark hope to see you again next year!

-Nathaniel Dark, Mammon

[toplawyermc-d]

*Racoon sneaks in through a door as the grunts pile out after having stolen a uniform from one of the many bodies.*

Mack would see a pair of Jenkins, one with a pair of headphones and the other reading what looks like a thick tome of some kind standing in front of a pair of cages. One holding a familiar couple: a large butler bird and a blue robed wind witch. The other has a small looking person in bandages.

Like, why do we have to watch these dudes again? -D.J.

Because Benny's trying to get soot off his shoes. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Of course they had their friends and loyal customers. The months of business negotiations has Mack managing to keep a neutral expression and walk up to them. This suit is so uncomfortable.

Hey. Vonkraft's sent me to take over for one of you. To keep an eye on the prisoners. Yes.

[toplawyermc-d]

... You honestly expect us to believe that? -S.J.

Yeah bruh, if you know Mr.VK then tell us what his favorite movie is. -D.J.

Deej that's... You know what, he does talk about it a lot. So tell us, what's his favorite movie. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

He watches movies?!

I mean--. Mr Hopper's Penguins of course.

[toplawyermc-d]

D.J. and Smart Jenkins move in, Smart puts a hand in his pocket before he pulls out... a key ring.

Yeah, there's no way anyone who knew Herald wouldn't know he loves Mr. Hopper's Penguins. -S.J.

Cha, dude watches it with his daughter every chance he gets! -D.J.

Anyway, see you later weird new Jenkins. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Its a good film. At least he has some class.

See you. I'll keep an eye on the prisoners.

That was ridiculously easy. Who-- are they that incompetent? Oh well. Take what you can get. Also he had a daughter? Someone reproduced with him of all people? Love is dead.

The moment Mack is certain the pair of Jenkins is gone they turn towards the cages and unlocks them.

Hey-- are you two okay? What happened?

[bunnylocamsh]

*Muffled curse words turn into happy muffled noises. Bunny has duct tape over her mouth and has weird magic dampeners over her hands. She hops over to the bars and happily greats Mac.*

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon moves fast and opens the cages, taking off the duct tape from Bunnyloca and offer Swatchman a hand.

Of course they caught you. Take out the mayor, think it will be easier...

[swatchman]

Didn't expect to have a whole town beat them off, did they? Thanks again, Mack.

[bunnylocamsh]

I'm so glad your here! *Once her anti magic cuffs are off, she pulls them all into a big hug.*

Before we go, how is everyone holding up? Mayor? You good?

@disco-afterparty

[disco-afterparty]

Goodness, that was quite the experience…

You assure Windy Girl you are fine, if a little achey in the noggin. You hug her tight, then profess you need not waste time! You all still have work to do!

[helluvaswatch]

Good to see you're doing well. @macaroni-racoon , I think now's a good time to see about stopping this auction!

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon cracks their knuckles, then pulls out their magic storage bag and rifles through.

Nope not that... Aha!

Racoon pulls out a gun and a whisk.

Will this help?

[helluvaswatch]

... That's just crazy enough to work.

*Swatch grabs the whisk and starts to brandish it like a club*

[macaroni-racoon]

Wait, Mayor (@disco-afterparty) do you have a weapon? Same to you @bunnylocamsh

[disco-afterparty]

You nod swiftly. You have just the thing to defeat these lying ruffians. You crack your knuckles menacingly. ow

[bunnylocamsh]

I have a magic broom at home, but I think my own magic can get me out of here.

I'll carry Mayor and give you a speed boost if you need Mac.

[macaroni-racoon]

Alright then. Let's beat these guys!

[mammondark]

Suddenly, a man in a top hat appears in front of Mack and the others, sniffing the air as he steps closer.

Is that... Gold you have? Yes, a large amount of Gold in fact, isn't it?

[macaroni-racoon]

Mack stops in their tracks.

Oh hi! Yes. Its uuhh 10 kilograms of gold I've been collecting over the years. Who are you?

[mammondark]

T-t-ten kilograms you say?! Aaahaha! Well, it's very good to meet you, oh wonderous patron! I am Mr. Nathaniel Dark, the Founder and President of Marshall, Carter, and Dark. At your service.

He bows deeply.

Now... Ten kilograms of gold must mean you're here to buy out our big ticket item for this season: Hell itself.

[macaroni-racoon]

Yes, of course. Ahaha...

You may call me Morris. That is what my associates call me. Of Racoon Investments est. 2025.

[mammondark]

Ah! What a wonderful opportunity to meet you Morris! Now, shall we finalize that payment? Where would you like Hell to be moved to?

Mr. Dark pulls out a certificate of ownership, his other hand stretched out to take the gold Mack offers.

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon pulls out a bag from their infinite storage bag, heaving it out and putting it on the floor.

Yes. Here you go. You can check. Its genuine. And leave hell in its current location.

Racoon takes the certificate of ownership and puts it in the infinite storage bag.

[mammondark]

Very well!

Dark grabs the gold bag and opens it, reaching a hand in and in an instant the gold seems to be... gone?

AHAH! Perfect! A wonderful deal! Please, enjoy your new Hell.

[toplawyermc-d]

*Racoon sneaks in through a door as the grunts pile out after having stolen a uniform from one of the many bodies.*

Mack would see a pair of Jenkins, one with a pair of headphones and the other reading what looks like a thick tome of some kind standing in front of a pair of cages. One holding a familiar couple: a large butler bird and a blue robed wind witch. The other has a small looking person in bandages.

Like, why do we have to watch these dudes again? -D.J.

Because Benny's trying to get soot off his shoes. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Of course they had their friends and loyal customers. The months of business negotiations has Mack managing to keep a neutral expression and walk up to them. This suit is so uncomfortable.

Hey. Vonkraft's sent me to take over for one of you. To keep an eye on the prisoners. Yes.

[toplawyermc-d]

... You honestly expect us to believe that? -S.J.

Yeah bruh, if you know Mr.VK then tell us what his favorite movie is. -D.J.

Deej that's... You know what, he does talk about it a lot. So tell us, what's his favorite movie. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

He watches movies?!

I mean--. Mr Hopper's Penguins of course.

[toplawyermc-d]

D.J. and Smart Jenkins move in, Smart puts a hand in his pocket before he pulls out... a key ring.

Yeah, there's no way anyone who knew Herald wouldn't know he loves Mr. Hopper's Penguins. -S.J.

Cha, dude watches it with his daughter every chance he gets! -D.J.

Anyway, see you later weird new Jenkins. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Its a good film. At least he has some class.

See you. I'll keep an eye on the prisoners.

That was ridiculously easy. Who-- are they that incompetent? Oh well. Take what you can get. Also he had a daughter? Someone reproduced with him of all people? Love is dead.

The moment Mack is certain the pair of Jenkins is gone they turn towards the cages and unlocks them.

Hey-- are you two okay? What happened?

[bunnylocamsh]

*Muffled curse words turn into happy muffled noises. Bunny has duct tape over her mouth and has weird magic dampeners over her hands. She hops over to the bars and happily greats Mac.*

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon moves fast and opens the cages, taking off the duct tape from Bunnyloca and offer Swatchman a hand.

Of course they caught you. Take out the mayor, think it will be easier...

[swatchman]

Didn't expect to have a whole town beat them off, did they? Thanks again, Mack.

[bunnylocamsh]

I'm so glad your here! *Once her anti magic cuffs are off, she pulls them all into a big hug.*

Before we go, how is everyone holding up? Mayor? You good?

@disco-afterparty

[disco-afterparty]

Goodness, that was quite the experience…

You assure Windy Girl you are fine, if a little achey in the noggin. You hug her tight, then profess you need not waste time! You all still have work to do!

[helluvaswatch]

Good to see you're doing well. @macaroni-racoon , I think now's a good time to see about stopping this auction!

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon cracks their knuckles, then pulls out their magic storage bag and rifles through.

Nope not that... Aha!

Racoon pulls out a gun and a whisk.

Will this help?

[helluvaswatch]

... That's just crazy enough to work.

*Swatch grabs the whisk and starts to brandish it like a club*

[macaroni-racoon]

Wait, Mayor (@disco-afterparty) do you have a weapon? Same to you @bunnylocamsh

[disco-afterparty]

You nod swiftly. You have just the thing to defeat these lying ruffians. You crack your knuckles menacingly. ow

[bunnylocamsh]

I have a magic broom at home, but I think my own magic can get me out of here.

I'll carry Mayor and give you a speed boost if you need Mac.

[macaroni-racoon]

Alright then. Let's beat these guys!

[mammondark]

Suddenly, a man in a top hat appears in front of Mack and the others, sniffing the air as he steps closer.

Is that... Gold you have? Yes, a large amount of Gold in fact, isn't it?

[macaroni-racoon]

Mack stops in their tracks.

Oh hi! Yes. Its uuhh 10 kilograms of gold I've been collecting over the years. Who are you?

[mammondark]

T-t-ten kilograms you say?! Aaahaha! Well, it's very good to meet you, oh wonderous patron! I am Mr. Nathaniel Dark, the Founder and President of Marshall, Carter, and Dark. At your service.

He bows deeply.

Now... Ten kilograms of gold must mean you're here to buy out our big ticket item for this season: Hell itself.

[macaroni-racoon]

Yes, of course. Ahaha...

You may call me Morris. That is what my associates call me. Of Racoon Investments est. 2025.

[mammondark]

Ah! What a wonderful opportunity to meet you Morris! Now, shall we finalize that payment? Where would you like Hell to be moved to?

Mr. Dark pulls out a certificate of ownership, his other hand stretched out to take the gold Mack offers.

[toplawyermc-d]

*Racoon sneaks in through a door as the grunts pile out after having stolen a uniform from one of the many bodies.*

Mack would see a pair of Jenkins, one with a pair of headphones and the other reading what looks like a thick tome of some kind standing in front of a pair of cages. One holding a familiar couple: a large butler bird and a blue robed wind witch. The other has a small looking person in bandages.

Like, why do we have to watch these dudes again? -D.J.

Because Benny's trying to get soot off his shoes. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Of course they had their friends and loyal customers. The months of business negotiations has Mack managing to keep a neutral expression and walk up to them. This suit is so uncomfortable.

Hey. Vonkraft's sent me to take over for one of you. To keep an eye on the prisoners. Yes.

[toplawyermc-d]

... You honestly expect us to believe that? -S.J.

Yeah bruh, if you know Mr.VK then tell us what his favorite movie is. -D.J.

Deej that's... You know what, he does talk about it a lot. So tell us, what's his favorite movie. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

He watches movies?!

I mean--. Mr Hopper's Penguins of course.

[toplawyermc-d]

D.J. and Smart Jenkins move in, Smart puts a hand in his pocket before he pulls out... a key ring.

Yeah, there's no way anyone who knew Herald wouldn't know he loves Mr. Hopper's Penguins. -S.J.

Cha, dude watches it with his daughter every chance he gets! -D.J.

Anyway, see you later weird new Jenkins. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Its a good film. At least he has some class.

See you. I'll keep an eye on the prisoners.

That was ridiculously easy. Who-- are they that incompetent? Oh well. Take what you can get. Also he had a daughter? Someone reproduced with him of all people? Love is dead.

The moment Mack is certain the pair of Jenkins is gone they turn towards the cages and unlocks them.

Hey-- are you two okay? What happened?

[bunnylocamsh]

*Muffled curse words turn into happy muffled noises. Bunny has duct tape over her mouth and has weird magic dampeners over her hands. She hops over to the bars and happily greats Mac.*

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon moves fast and opens the cages, taking off the duct tape from Bunnyloca and offer Swatchman a hand.

Of course they caught you. Take out the mayor, think it will be easier...

[swatchman]

Didn't expect to have a whole town beat them off, did they? Thanks again, Mack.

[bunnylocamsh]

I'm so glad your here! *Once her anti magic cuffs are off, she pulls them all into a big hug.*

Before we go, how is everyone holding up? Mayor? You good?

@disco-afterparty

[disco-afterparty]

Goodness, that was quite the experience…

You assure Windy Girl you are fine, if a little achey in the noggin. You hug her tight, then profess you need not waste time! You all still have work to do!

[helluvaswatch]

Good to see you're doing well. @macaroni-racoon , I think now's a good time to see about stopping this auction!

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon cracks their knuckles, then pulls out their magic storage bag and rifles through.

Nope not that... Aha!

Racoon pulls out a gun and a whisk.

Will this help?

[helluvaswatch]

... That's just crazy enough to work.

*Swatch grabs the whisk and starts to brandish it like a club*

[macaroni-racoon]

Wait, Mayor (@disco-afterparty) do you have a weapon? Same to you @bunnylocamsh

[disco-afterparty]

You nod swiftly. You have just the thing to defeat these lying ruffians. You crack your knuckles menacingly. ow

[bunnylocamsh]

I have a magic broom at home, but I think my own magic can get me out of here.

I'll carry Mayor and give you a speed boost if you need Mac.

[macaroni-racoon]

Alright then. Let's beat these guys!

[mammondark]

Suddenly, a man in a top hat appears in front of Mack and the others, sniffing the air as he steps closer.

Is that... Gold you have? Yes, a large amount of Gold in fact, isn't it?

[macaroni-racoon]

Mack stops in their tracks.

Oh hi! Yes. Its uuhh 10 kilograms of gold I've been collecting over the years. Who are you?

[mammondark]

T-t-ten kilograms you say?! Aaahaha! Well, it's very good to meet you, oh wonderous patron! I am Mr. Nathaniel Dark, the Founder and President of Marshall, Carter, and Dark. At your service.

He bows deeply.

Now... Ten kilograms of gold must mean you're here to buy out our big ticket item for this season: Hell itself.

[toplawyermc-d]

*Racoon sneaks in through a door as the grunts pile out after having stolen a uniform from one of the many bodies.*

Mack would see a pair of Jenkins, one with a pair of headphones and the other reading what looks like a thick tome of some kind standing in front of a pair of cages. One holding a familiar couple: a large butler bird and a blue robed wind witch. The other has a small looking person in bandages.

Like, why do we have to watch these dudes again? -D.J.

Because Benny's trying to get soot off his shoes. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Of course they had their friends and loyal customers. The months of business negotiations has Mack managing to keep a neutral expression and walk up to them. This suit is so uncomfortable.

Hey. Vonkraft's sent me to take over for one of you. To keep an eye on the prisoners. Yes.

[toplawyermc-d]

... You honestly expect us to believe that? -S.J.

Yeah bruh, if you know Mr.VK then tell us what his favorite movie is. -D.J.

Deej that's... You know what, he does talk about it a lot. So tell us, what's his favorite movie. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

He watches movies?!

I mean--. Mr Hopper's Penguins of course.

[toplawyermc-d]

D.J. and Smart Jenkins move in, Smart puts a hand in his pocket before he pulls out... a key ring.

Yeah, there's no way anyone who knew Herald wouldn't know he loves Mr. Hopper's Penguins. -S.J.

Cha, dude watches it with his daughter every chance he gets! -D.J.

Anyway, see you later weird new Jenkins. -S.J.

[macaroni-racoon]

Its a good film. At least he has some class.

See you. I'll keep an eye on the prisoners.

That was ridiculously easy. Who-- are they that incompetent? Oh well. Take what you can get. Also he had a daughter? Someone reproduced with him of all people? Love is dead.

The moment Mack is certain the pair of Jenkins is gone they turn towards the cages and unlocks them.

Hey-- are you two okay? What happened?

[bunnylocamsh]

*Muffled curse words turn into happy muffled noises. Bunny has duct tape over her mouth and has weird magic dampeners over her hands. She hops over to the bars and happily greats Mac.*

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon moves fast and opens the cages, taking off the duct tape from Bunnyloca and offer Swatchman a hand.

Of course they caught you. Take out the mayor, think it will be easier...

[swatchman]

Didn't expect to have a whole town beat them off, did they? Thanks again, Mack.

[bunnylocamsh]

I'm so glad your here! *Once her anti magic cuffs are off, she pulls them all into a big hug.*

Before we go, how is everyone holding up? Mayor? You good?

@disco-afterparty

[disco-afterparty]

Goodness, that was quite the experience…

You assure Windy Girl you are fine, if a little achey in the noggin. You hug her tight, then profess you need not waste time! You all still have work to do!

[helluvaswatch]

Good to see you're doing well. @macaroni-racoon , I think now's a good time to see about stopping this auction!

[macaroni-racoon]

Racoon cracks their knuckles, then pulls out their magic storage bag and rifles through.

Nope not that... Aha!

Racoon pulls out a gun and a whisk.

Will this help?

[helluvaswatch]

... That's just crazy enough to work.

*Swatch grabs the whisk and starts to brandish it like a club*

[macaroni-racoon]

Wait, Mayor (@disco-afterparty) do you have a weapon? Same to you @bunnylocamsh

[disco-afterparty]

You nod swiftly. You have just the thing to defeat these lying ruffians. You crack your knuckles menacingly. ow

[bunnylocamsh]

I have a magic broom at home, but I think my own magic can get me out of here.

I'll carry Mayor and give you a speed boost if you need Mac.

[macaroni-racoon]

Alright then. Let's beat these guys!

[mammondark]

Suddenly, a man in a top hat appears in front of Mack and the others, sniffing the air as he steps closer.

Is that... Gold you have? Yes, a large amount of Gold in fact, isn't it?

[disco-afterparty]

From one of the many miraculously appearing black doors, into the MC&D building is Multitude, transformed into a form The Devil hasn't seen before; black ash creeping further up his arms and legs; outfit tattered like it had been burned in the flames of his transformation, his flaming hair longer and clinging to his back like fur; his eyes a burning white...

His gaze lands on Da Devil, and he grins.

Hey, figured I'd find you here! Glad to see you left the place in one peice for me.

The Devil dropped the pipe a while ago, standing in an empty building, thinking of what he has to do next. Then a voice he doesn’t register immediately as familiar chimes up behind him.

He suddenly spins to quickly face him, not hesitating to extend his hand and erect a red spike from the ground, aiming for his chest. It’s fast but can be dodged if Multi is quick enough.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

And Multi is quick enough, jumping out the way with barely a yep.

Are you seriously THAT pissed about me following you?!

[disco-afterparty]

Who are you?

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi stands there confused before snapping his fingers together in realization.

Oooh, right, you weren't there for the... hi, yeah, it's Multitude. You like the new form? Hurt like a bitch to transform into, but it's built to cause a lot of damage, so I made the sacrifice.

[disco-afterparty]

As he explains, his brow furrows. He lowers his hand and the spike disappears into mist.

… What the fuck are you doing here? I told you to stay behind.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

I already told you why - this Dark guy is threatening my home, kidnapped my boyfriend, and is overall a total jerk. I want to help take him down!

[disco-afterparty]

You CANT. You dont even know what youre getting into - you dont know the kind of demon Mammon is!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

He's the leader of Greed, isn't he? Super powerful, super scary? I'm a literal ex-solider from Heaven, I know things!

[disco-afterparty]

But do you know what hes done? Worse than me for sure!

Do you even have a plan? Do you know what youre doing?!

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Yeah - get to his office, see if I can't intimidate some information out of him and if that doesn't work, I start setting things on fire until he talks! Do YOU have a plan?

[disco-afterparty]

Thats fucking garbage and youre going to die.

Yeah. Im gonna get in there and KILL HIM IMMEDIATELY.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Okay, and when you do, do you have ANY clue where to find The Mayor after? Or Jenkins? Swatch? Bunny? Because they were all kidnapped, put in cages, and are SOMEWHERE in this building - and the guy who probably knows where they are is Dark. But he'll be dead. Because you killed them. Are you seriously going to spend hours combing through this building to find them?

Or, simpler route, we cut the searching time by having Dark tell us where they are and THEN kill him!

[disco-afterparty]

I CAN FIND THEM MYSELF. BY MYSELF.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

You are so stubborn... do you even know where Dark's office is?

[disco-afterparty]

I know his scent. I can sniff him out easy.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

No need, because I already know! It's upstairs, we take a left at the hall with the pink diamonds. Aren't I so helpful?

Multi starts walking towards the stairs, seemingly undeterred by The Devil's insistence.

[disco-afterparty]

He doesn’t say anything as Multi starts to walk away…

Because he’s already gone. The description was enough for The Devil to just teleport there without him. Honestly, he probably should’ve figured he’d be in his office…

[mammondark]

Mr. Dark sits at a desk made of ivory and bone in the Greed Layer, the office around him made of thick walls of pink diamond, his chair seeming to be made of the hide of some extinct animal, and as he signs off on some paperwork he looks up and smirks.

Well well... Hello there, Devil.

[disco-afterparty]

Once The Devil appears, and he’s gotten a good look at the room, he hovers forward closer to Mammon with little hesitation…

And punches him straight across the face.

[mammondark]

Mammon leans back as the punch lands, then slowly turns to face The Devil.

... A fine howdy-doo to you too then. Now, if you'd please.

Mr. Dark snaps his fingers and a pair of chairs made of rhino leather erupts from the floor near the Devil, another snap and @sailor-guardian-multitude is teleported into the room.

Take a seat, please.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi looks around to quickly realize where he is, and when his eyes land on Mammon, his posture turns defensive, eyes narrow.

Hi, yeah, no, I think I'll stand. My hair will definitely set fire to your... very interesting choice of chair, and I don't tend to lead conversations with arson.

[disco-afterparty]

The Devil snaps his fingers and both chairs erupt into flames. He stays upright, keeping his eyes trained on Mammon. He doesn’t even glance at Multi.

Where are they.

[mammondark]

Where are who? You'll need to be more specific, since I have a few different things going on right now, D.

Mr. Dark leans back in his chair, tossing his tophat onto the desk.

[disco-afterparty]

He slams a fist down on the desk and it cracks down the middle.

YOU KNOW WHO.

[toplawyermc-d]

... Are you trying to be intimidating? In my own domain?

Dark starts to laugh, it sounds nasally and condescending as he stands.

Fine, I know who you're talking about... But I'm not telling you where they are.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi takes a deep breath, stepping forward. His hair burns brighter as he struggles not to set the entire office ablaze. He speak through a gritted smile.

What. Do you mean. You aren't. Telling us?

[mammondark]

I mean that I'm not going to tell you, and if you don't want to be bald again for the next few years I suggest you calm down.

Mammon walks around the desk and waves his hand, a small table with a chess game appearing. He then pushes the table over, making it turn into a roulette wheel.

Ah, much better. Now, we're going to make a little trade. It's simple: You give me something, and I'll call the auction off.

[disco-afterparty]

He watches him carefully, never taking his eye off Mammon for even a second.

Whatever you want, I doubt it’s reasonable, so no.

[mammondark]

Then you'll have to find a new home, won't you? I'm sure your boyfriend's daughter will be thrilled to learn how you and the fallen angel here lost Hell because you wouldn't even listen to what one of the Lords of Hell wanted to get instead.

Sure, she'll come after me... but she doesn't have a standard for me... She'll probably end up blowing up at you, and who'll get in the crossfire?

[disco-afterparty]

He glares at him, seemingly unperturbed by the threats. But he doesn’t bite back this time.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multi notices The Devil's silence and, after a moment of calming down his boiling rage, decides to inquire further.

How do we know you're going to honor your side of the deal, exactly? It's not like you're known for playing by the honor system.

[mammondark]

True, but let's just say I don't really want to sell off Hell. This was mostly just a way to get a foot hold a bit deeper in, ensure that I can have my eyes and ears where they're needed.

After all, Hell switches rulers like Taylor Swift used to switch boyfriends. So... My offer is simple. I want to put a few things into Yaoi Central: a law office and a competitor to my... brother? Cousin? To Lucifer's Evil Tim Hortons. Just a little claim to stake in the up and coming community of Yaoi Central.

[disco-afterparty]

No.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Devil, your haggling sucks.

Multi takes another deep breath, moving his flaming bangs out of his face so he can look Mammon in the eyes better.

A law office and an Evil Tim Horton's competitor? Okay, let's play along.

I can do for you the land in the surrounding swamp of Yaoi Central for a MC&D law office and a not-Tim Horton's, in exchange for Hell being put off the auction forever and a clue as to where our friends and my boyfriend are being held. If it's a good clue, I can probably get your not-Tim Horton's on the train station - who doesn't want to buy a coffee for their morning commute? You'd get better buisness there than you would from the very bitter and very grudge-holdy citizens of Yaoi Central.

[mammondark]

Hmmm... that is true, plus that's a market that Evil Tim Hortons doesn't have access to...

Very well! I accept the terms of your deal! Shall we shake on it, Multitude?

Mammon pulls the glove off his hand, revealing a clawed, dark, scaled hand that looks much like a normal demons.

[disco-afterparty]

No. We’re not haggling because this isn’t -

He smacks Mammon’s gross hand away, getting in front of Multitude and taking him firmly by the shoulders.

Do NOT make a deal with this guy. Never make a deal with anyone like him.

Listen to me… We can do this without him. We can figure this out without causing more problems.

[sailor-guardian-multitude]

Multitude looks over Devil's shoulder to do his best 'I'm so sorry about this' look to Mammon before looking back to him.

He knows where our friends are, he has our home hostage, and clearly you failed to kill him on sight cause he's still alive! So, what choice do we have? What's your plan?

[disco-afterparty]

I didnt try to kill him, i just punched him in the face!

We kill him by distracting him, by destroying something he needs. Something he cant get back.

[mammondark]

You all know that whatever I have I can just buy back right? Money is power after all.

[disco-afterparty]

He looks back at Mammon and shoves his face away from them in disgust. He turns back to the fellow demon and straightens up with a huff.

FINE. You want a deal?

Let’s make a deal.

He snaps his fingers, and next to him appears crimson parchment paper and a quill ready with black ink, both hovering and ready to get to work on their own.

What are your stipulations?

[mammondark]

My stipulations! Well I'm happy to sta-... To Star... Sniff sniff... One moment.

Mammon sinks into the diamonds his realm is made of.