Robert Help I’m Back On My BS

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Nah

@david-anon

[marcus-the-wyvern]

You can pay me to walk your dog. You cannot pay me enough to give it back.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

The heart is a muscle just like any other part of the body. Similarly, I will train mine til failure.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

I am feeling like two corgis in a trench coat. Quite tubular.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Robert I thought this was a weed brownie but it’s just a really good brownie. The high feeling was from the four tabs of acid I did before the brownie.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

I get wet at the thought of you, Robert. Tears roll down my glistening skin, gently marinated with shea body butter. Not too coarse. Full body lotion rolls down my thighs.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Robert. I am fueled with a blind rage, 200 milligrams of lamotrigine, four times the recommended amount of caffeine for an adult male, and will be fighting god to assume his role as supreme ruler.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

You must control what parts of life you can Robert, and let go of those which you cannot. You may only control what you add or subtract from a situation. This is why I have removed South Carolina.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Come Robert. The vibes not going to ruin itself.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Hey Robert check this out *disassociates*

[marcus-the-wyvern]

The white monster energy drinks robert. The white monster energy drinks.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Instead of threatening to kill myself I now point to my brain and say “It’s pissing me off”

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Robert I have been banned from Costco Wholesale Warehouse Market. Specifically the rotisserie chickens. They need to make the chickens less fuckable, Robert, they know what they are doing.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Robert *gestures vaguely to everything* it’s pissing me off

[marcus-the-wyvern]

This is a spider kick to the heart

[marcus-the-wyvern]

I made a promise. If four months this feeling ain’t gone then, Robert, fuck this city. I’m moving to South Carolina.

[marcus-the-wyvern]

Maybe, just maybe, the rigatoni pasta was the Roberts we made along the way