[martyirize]

ㅤ                everyday there's this fear , that i'm doing it wrong ...

independent , mutually exclusive michael burnham of star trek discovery , canon & headcanon based. carrd ( under co. ) tracklist  created 10 / 17. revamped 05 / 26.

inspired themes: martyrism , willingly being the sacrificial lamb and scapegoat , survivor's guilt , hope , learning to heal , taking responsibility for everything , fear , losing everything and learning to get back up

ㅤ                it drives me that fear ...

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[sc1enceleads]

"Power corrupts, love heals."

      a doctor who universe's kate stewart side-blog as written by lins

    (psd cred.)

[cuddlybitch]

Hydration pack. Emergency ration pack. Phaser. Delta shield. Commander Michael Burnham, Starfleet. Commander Michael Burnham, Science Officer, USS Discovery. Serial number SC0064-0974SHN. Science Officer, USS Discovery. Serial number SC0064-0974SHN. Stand up. Walk.

[martyirize]

           BUT THE DARK IS WAITING TO SEIZE ME, SHRED THE MOAN NESTLED IN MY THROAT.    / once, i asked the walls / if they would help be nothing / help me vanish & never reappear

[iunmadehim]

“then why are you struggling with whether or not you belong here?”  i don’t know. maybe because the stakes are so much higher now. everything is different. 

[gloomglimmer]

›       TENSION   LINER   PROMPTS     

"I   dare   you   to   try."

"Do   you   always   get   close?"

"You’re   pushing   my   limits."

"Stop   looking   at   me   like   that."

"I’m   losing   control   here."

"You   have   no   idea,   do   you?"

"I   can’t   resist   you   anymore."

"Stay   back,   or   don’t."

"I   know   what   you   want."

"This   is   getting   dangerous   now."

"You’re   too   tempting   for   me."

"I   shouldn’t   want   this,   but…"

"I   don’t   play   fair,   remember?"

"Careful,   you’re   testing   me."

"You’re   just   making   it   worse."

"You’re   too   close   for   comfort."

"Do   you   always   push   buttons?"

"Stop   before   I   kiss   you."

"You’re   making   it   too   hard."

"I   can’t   stop   thinking   about   you."

"I   want   you   too   much."

"You   know   exactly   what   you’re   doing."

"I’m   not   playing   games   here."

"You’ve   crossed   the   line   now."

"Keep   pushing,   and   you’ll   regret   it."

"This   is   dangerous,   isn’t   it?"

"I’m   trying   not   to   care."

"Don’t   make   me   regret   this."

"You’re   playing   with   fire."

"You   don’t   know   what’s   coming."

"I   shouldn’t   be   this   close."

"We’re   getting   dangerously   close   now."

"I   can   feel   the   heat."

"Don’t   test   me   right   now."

"I   want   you   too   badly."

"Don’t   make   me   chase   you."

"You’re   distracting   me,   you   know."

"I   won’t   fall   for   this."

"I   want   you,   but…"

"What   do   you   want   from   me?"

"I’ll   never   give   in."

"I’m   trying   not   to   care."

"You’re   playing   with   my   patience."

"Don’t   make   this   harder,   please."

"I   can’t   stop   this   feeling."

"I’m   already   in   too   deep."

"You   won’t   walk   away   unscathed."

"You’re   walking   a   fine   line."

"I’m   trying   to   stay   calm."

"What   are   you   doing   to   me?"

[avoicefromthestars]

Star Trek: Discovery Unification III

[berleezymoved]

𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚂𝙸𝙱𝙻𝚈 𝙶𝙾 𝚆𝚁𝙾𝙽𝙶 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚂.    feel free to change pronouns/tenses to suit scenarios, etc.

“baby, come here.”

“i get so lonely at night.”

“why can’t you tell that i’m desperate?”

“why can’t you tell that i’m bad for you?”

“i wish i was you.”

“so, why can’t you tell me what you think i should?”

“if you were here for the other night, you’d be terrified.”

“you know, i think the lines you’re afraid of are all made up.”

“last night, it was bad.”

“i wanna slow it down, but nobody would’ve let me.”

“maybe if you feel out of place, maybe it’s because you are.”

“i hope they crucify me.”

“no more parties in los angeles.”

“as of right now, my job is to lie down.”

“i hope they cancel me.”

“i pretend i’m ten times stronger for you.”

“you show so much promise.”

“it’s okay to be unhappy with all this.”

“what’s it like to be you?”

“do you see me that way?”

“do you remember my name?”

“i want her.”

“i want her to be just like you.”

“you know you’re my favorite.”

“just like me in my day, but you got all your priorities mixed up.”

“what’s it like being famous?”

“do you see a stranger when you look at my face?”

“sometimes, i wanna save you from everything.”

“it’s impossible to say what you’re gonna be.”

“it’s no business of mine how you waste your time.”

“i bet you miss what you had.”

“do you ever wonder why everyone is out to get you every day?”

“do you question anything?”

“how many warning signs until it hits you?”

“gravity’s your friend.”

“too many factors to be sure.”

“so many reasons to think twice.”

“you fall out of touch sometimes.”

“simple things make a difference in your day.”

“when you cry, i get fucking anxiety.”

“take the time to tell me how it ended up this way.”

“your love is cheap; it doesn’t cost anything.”

“what happens when you can’t keep doing it?”

“am i just scared for you?”

“can you feel the weight of their eyes on your neck?”

“i know you didn’t make any plans.”

“are we dead?”

“were you feeling left out?”

“they can tell that your mind is a mess.”

“these days don’t end.”

“you lost the things that brought us closer.”

“forgot how good it feels to be alone.”

“is this how i’m supposed to feel?”

“make it easy for me.”

“take it easy on me.”

“i still don’t know how you felt.”

“you can’t blame me.”

“why switch like different seasons?”

“you won’t find heaven, not in these hills.”

“you shouldn’t be here.”

“you can still make your mind.”

“i can’t save your life.”

“you can’t carry me through this.”

“i got your back sometime.”

“you’ll still be my favorite.”

“i wish i could save you.”

“i guess you got what you wanted.”

“you got your answer.”

“i’m in a dark place.”

“just know i’m not proud of everything i did so far.”

“i do it all for you.”

“can you follow my lead for once?”

“i can never make up for the time.”

“this is not love, i’m a glorified doorstop.”

“you wonder why we fell into a standstill.”

“we don’t need long.”

“still in the same boat.”

“please don’t ask to stay with me.”

“yeah, i’m still the same.”

“i feel insane.”

“don’t take this shit too serious.”

“look at what we accomplished.”

“i can tell you what it means.”

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐡𝐢𝐭 ‘𝐞𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  more  angst  to  devastate  your  writing  partners.  metaphorically.  )

❛ you’re a weapon, and weapons don’t weep. ❜

❛ you can’t save everyone. ❜

❛ it should have been you. ❜

❛ did i do good? ❜

❛ i’m sorry that i can’t save you. ❜

❛ wait for me, will you? ❜

❛ i can’t lose you again! ❜

❛ you were dead, i saw you die. ❜

❛ we won’t forget each other, right? ❜

❛ i’m real. i’m here. ❜

❛ you already know how this will end. ❜

❛ it’s always my fault, isn’t it? ❜

❛ i don’t want to go. ❜

❛ can you remember how you died? ❜

❛ i love you, but you’re not mine. ❜

❛ have you ever lost someone? ❜

❛ i didn’t ask to get made. ❜

❛ you’re as beautiful as the day i lost you. ❜

❛ i never meant to hurt you. ❜

❛ is it really you? ❜

❛ their blood is on your hands. ❜

❛ it would have been better to die. ❜

❛ i’m not ready to lose you yet. ❜

❛ i wish i met you sooner. ❜

❛ let’s just stay here. grow old. ❜

❛ you’re the first friend i ever had. ❜

❛ i told you not to fall in love with me. ❜

❛ you always push people away. i just thought you’d never do it to me. ❜

❛ everyone i’ve cared about has either died of left me. except for you. ❜

❛ i know i have a heart because i can feel it breaking. ❜

❛ they’re not coming back. ❜

❛ i’m sorry, have we met? ❜

❛ in my dreams, we’re still together. ❜

❛ you’re the one good thing left in this world. ❜

❛ i hate the way that i don’t hate you. ❜

❛ it’s okay. you can let go. ❜

❛ you mean nothing to me. ❜

❛ we’re on our own now. ❜

❛ you can’t kill me, i’m not alive. ❜

❛ it wasn’t supposed to end like this. ❜

❛ do you remember when we first met? ❜

❛ we’ll see each other again. ❜

❛ there’s nothing you could have done. ❜

❛ we did it. we won. ❜

❛ let’s not go back. not ever. ❜

❛ thanks for playing with me. ❜

❛ why does it feel like this is goodbye? ❜

[lavendermemes]

& .˚      the  expanse  prompts.     (  this is an assortment from all seasons, including season six trailers, from many characters and is mostly focused on the themes of war, politics, morality, humanity & all that jazz. feel free to change pronouns if needed.   )

“   a kid needs at least one person who never gives up on them, no matter what   ”

“   everyone leaves unfinished business. that’s what dying is.   ”

“   the sides change sometimes. what we think we’re fighting for. who we tell ourselves are the good people. but it just seems we can’t ever stop fighting war after war after war. it’s part of being human. an ugly part, but i don’t think it will ever change.   ”

“   no weapon ever brings peace.  ”

“   i’m never going to like what you did, but i can’t hate you for doing what you thought was right.  ”

“   i think, ‘[her] father was a terrible person,’ but a lot of people have terrible parents. and then i think, ‘[she]’s clearly damaged person,’ but then, who isn’t? so i’m down to, ‘maybe [she] has a brain tumor.’  do you have a brain tumor?  ”

“   hate is a burden. you don’t have to carry it with you   ”

“    us and them.  how many of us… how many of them ?   ”

“   you’re either some kind of genius or you’re the luckiest dipshit in the solar system.   ”

“   the war does not end when people put down their guns; it ends when they reconcile. until then, the war has only paused.   ”

“   you just have to believe that what you’re doing really matters, and then the fear can’t control you.   ”

“   don’t worry about what i want,  worry about what i am due.    ”

“   walking away is the only choice anyone ever has.    ”

“   and he’s building it on a river of blood, with your help !     ”

“   the thing about civilization is, it keeps you civil. get rid of one; you can’t count on the other.   ”

“   if we decided to include everyone in our tribe without demanding that they prove we need them, maybe people wouldn’t have thrown rocks at us in the first place.   ”

“   as long as we’re living and breathing, there’s more we can do.  we just have to be strong enough.   ”

“   maybe this war was inevitable, maybe there was no way to avoid it. the best you can hope for is that it’s justified.   ”

“   good and bad, don’t get distracted by that.  it will just confuse you. good men do bad things and bad men do things believing it’s for the good of all mankind.    ”

“   i didn’t kill [him] because he was crazy.  i killed [him] because he was making sense.   ”

“   you give a monkey a stick, inevitably he’ll beat another monkey to death with it.   ”

“   the way i see it, there’s only three kinds of people in this world. bad ones, ones you follow, and ones you need to protect.   ”

“   truth is truth. how you deal with it is up to you.  ”

“   the hardest part of this game is figuring out who the enemy really is.   ”

“   every shitty thing we do makes the next one that much easier, doesn’t it?   ”

“   individuals can be divided and conquered, but symbols… symbols endure.   ”

“   there are ways that you can live a good life, without being a good person.   ”

“   stars are better off without us.   ”

“   guilt is like salt. you put a little on, and it hides all the bitterness.   ”

“   don’t decide for them. tell them the truth and let them decide for themselves.   ”

“   i never loved you because you were fighters,  i loved you because you were builders.  ”

“   a child who won’t grow up turns into a fool.  ” 

“   you must always have a knife in the darkness.   ”

“   violence is indiscriminate. if you use it as a tool, it will do more than just kill your enemies. sometimes it will kill the ones you love most.   ”

“   no matter how traumatic the loss is, you only have so much emotional stamina. even grief can get used up.   ”

“   everything you do is corrupt, and i can’t stand to be part of it.   ”

“   if you want to die, i can’t stop you. but there is a path from where you are to where i am. all we did was buy you a little time. you decide what you want to do with it.    ”

“   i need you to know, whatever happens, wherever you go, you’re not gonna do it alone.    ”

“   we did not choose this, but this is our fight now.  ”

“   see, here’s the thing.  i was terrified for you, i didn’t know why.  and now i do, you will do anything to win. i won’t play with you, ever again.   ”

“   [she] trusted you, [she] put [her]self in your hands ‘cause [she] couldn’t see the blood on ‘em.   ”

“   if we get out of this, we have to find a way to understand each other, to explain why we made the choices that we did. it is the only way that we can let go of the hate.   ”

“   but there’s only one thing that i need to tell you and it’s the simplest thing. but it’s the hardest thing to remember. listen to your heart. no matter what. it’ll always be the right call.   ”

“   war is an inherently unstable interaction of three things: intense emotion, politics and luck.   ”

“   in the end, the only thing that matters is fighting for who’s covering your back.   ”

“   many fought for us to get here. many died. we have lost people we loved, and have suffered. we would be justified to seek vengeance. but instead, we will choose peace. we must choose peace.   ”

“   when people don’t tell the truth, it always ends badly.   ”

“   how much shit do i have to eat before you treat me with some respect ?    ”

“   what i want to know now is, are we - i mean humanity - are we part of that plan?  ”

“   we’re on the brink right now because we keep reacting to things we don’t understand. we’re scared, we’re hurt, and we’re reaching for violence cause we can’t figure out what to do.  just this once, can’t we try something else?  ” 

“   i know he wouldn’t die for you, but he would let you die for him.   ”

“   a parent you never hear from exists in a quantum state, both dead and alive, until you check up on them and the act of observing makes one of the two states true.   ”

“   we were already at war. you just couldn’t see it because they were killing us slow.   ”

“   i have killed but I’m not a killer, because a killer is a monster and monsters aren’t afraid.   ”

“   killing people doesn’t mean you’re strong.   ”

“   now the only dream i have for you is that someday, you will regret all the things you’ve already done.    ”

“   we’re wounded, broken, trying desperately to keep ourselves going by pretending we’re not.      ”

“   people come into our lives and they go out. families change. it can be hard and sad, but we bear it, as long as we don’t shut ourselves off from the new, wonderful things that come—and i know there will be more wonderful things for you.    ”