Coming to you on September 8
Late Bloomer
Written by @darcydelaney with art by @medicatedmaniac
Rating: Mature
Word count: ~8500
Characters: Dean, Cas, Benny, Victor, Becky
Ships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Tags: No archive warnings apply, Alternate universe - modern setting, high school reunion, homophobia, coming out later in life, Dean POV
Summary: Normally, Dean Winchester wouldn’t be caught dead at his high school reunion. But after finally figuring out at age 40 that he’s not straight, all he can think about is his younger self: what his high school experience might have been like, which of his classmates he may have had crushes on, how he deserves to be out too. And, well, now here Dean is, heading into his high school reunion.
Excerpt: “When I finally figured it out, realized I liked guys and girls, I cried. I should’ve been happy or relieved, and I was so mad, so mad at myself that I wasn’t.”
“What were you?” Cas asks quietly.
“Scared,” Dean says, shaking his head and staring down at his hands. “So damn scared. Embarrassed. Pissed at myself. At all the time I’d wasted. I know people come out later in life all the time, but it felt like everyone around me had just already known who they were since they were young, no sweat. And then there’s me, bumbling around like a moron without a fucking clue. Seriously, what if I’d died before realizing I actually like sucking di—”
Dean’s brain finally catches up to his mouth and he cuts himself off sharply, cheeks burning. He chances a look over at Cas, who’s trying hard not to laugh. “Well, I’m glad that crisis was averted.”
“Yeah, me too,” Dean can’t help but say, shoving a hand roughly through his hair with a chuckle. “I thought I knew everything about myself. But suddenly I had to start from square one at forty fucking years old. And lemme tell ya, the existential crises hit a hell of a lot harder when they’re not just about a job or where you live, but who you fucking love.”
Cas is silent next to him, and Dean swallows: shit, he’s overshared. Cas came here to have a good time and catch up with old friends, not have Dean use him as a goddamn stand-in for his therapist. “I’m getting better though,” he adds quickly. “At ‘reframing,’ my therapist calls it. Being happy for myself, no strings attached. Not beating myself up for not having figured it all out sooner. Giving my past self a fucking break.”
When Cas finally does speak, his voice is quiet, hesitant. “Is that why you came tonight?”
Dean nods. “To come out,” he says. “Or for high school Dean to, anyway. I know it’s kinda dumb, but I think he deserves it.”
“He does,” Cas agrees, and the small, soft smile he gives Dean has his cheeks going hot. Dean freezes as he watches Cas reach over and rest his hand on Dean’s knee. His breath catches in his chest when Cas gives his knee a gentle, reassuring squeeze through the denim of his jeans. “And we all deserve to know him for who he really is.”
