A Study in Pastels @mary-poppins-quite-contrary - Tumblr Blog

0bimomkenobi

I am here for Sweatshirt Ben™

wolfsbiteblog-deactivated202505

“We are eternally star-crossed, you & I.

But just this once...

Please...

Allow us to meet in the middle.

Allow our fates to intertwine,

even if the results are fatal.

I wish to sip the love from your lips

like the fountain of youth: eternal.”

Maybe then, death will be kind...

Maybe then, death will be gentle.”

hilarioushumorfromouterspace

aubs-of-steel-deactivated201708

fun fact: The last supper would have been more like this, according to tradition:

evangeline-elena-deactivated201

so casual i love it

thedevoteddemon

a sleepover with jc and the boys

hotcommunist-deactivated2019032

Paul: Judas truth or dare??

Judas: dare

Paul: okay lmao I dare u to kiss JC

just-shower-thoughts

It is an unspoken rule that if a little kid is hiding under a blanket or couch cushions, you are required to comment on how lumpy the blanket is and pretend to sit on it to try and “smooth it out.”

tgmember

Also, if you’re playing hide-and-seek with them, it is critical that you search every other possible (and impossible) hiding spot, all the while wondering out loud how they managed to disappear just like magic, before walking right past their hiding spot.

the-catholic-geek

And if a baby starts playing peekaboo you are required to act surprised when they show their face again

pornhubstepmom-deactivated20191

If a kid hands you a phone, you answer it

a-trashcan-made-out-of-fandoms

If a kid shoots you with a Nerf Gun you are supposed to Die a dramatic death and explain “ugh you shot me blaahh”

gobbochune-deactivated20241018

when you push a kid on the swings ya gotta do the woosh

zetsubonna

I literally just blocked about a dozen people on this post for being cranky about children.

Being a joyless shitbeast to kids isn’t cool. They’re kids. If you want to be Oscar the Grouch, that’s fine, but do it in a way they understand and explain it to them.

“I don’t want to play, I’m grumpy. Thank you, though, that was kind.”

It’s literally not hard. Kids are small people. Treat them with common fucking decency.

robertdeniro

Here’s to the ones who dream Foolish as they may seem Here’s to the hearts that ache Here’s to the mess we make

la-laborista-republiko

abloodymess

I’ll stop quoting him when I’m dead.

dapurinthos

Text version: I live in a world that is completely seamless between the two. Fantasy is the real story. The world in which we live is structured from notions that are completely fabricated; your clothes, your wallet, that we all agree that pieces of paper are worth something. Geography is a complete fabrication. Where does Mexico start and America end? From space, nowhere. We agree to kill each other, to tax each other, to shame each other from notions that are complete fabrications. To me, those are harmful fantasies. Whereas my fantasies are liberating.

- Guillermo Del Toro on Reality and Fantasy

what-did-you-do-to-my-drink

same

timhortons

i hope youre all lying and hyping your cv/resume’s up

timhortons

i have never gotten an interview and not been offered a job position after it

timhortons

I mean lets be honest if everyone else is gassing theirs up like no tomorrow and you’re being as honest as you can who th are the recruitment team going to be more interested in

timhortons

There’s people working in my banks head office with me WITH MUCH MORE EXPERIENCE than me BUT ARE GETTING PAID LESS

timhortons

we’re doing the exact same job role

timhortons

the point I’m trying to make here is if you’ve handled finances for a company you’re now what i would call a treasurer my g, if you’ve done admin work you are now a secretary (or as I’ve put Management secretary)

timhortons

you help some kid with his homework? you’re a private tutor.

keep your bullets points for the job role as concise and important sounding as possible AND ALWAYS EMPHASIS THAT YOURE A TEAM PLAYER IF YOURE GOING TO WORK IN A TEAM.

timhortons

go into that interview room and get your story straight the night before and remember that interviews are two way conversatons yes they might be grilling you but at the end of it make sure to grill them BACK. do you have any hesitations about my qualifications? my suitability for the job? any feedback on my cv? how long have you been working at this company? do you like it here? whats the work environment like?

I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS GET THE SAME FEEDBACK WHEN THEY GET BACK IN TOUCH WITH ME

“ive never been asked those questions before” / “you were one of the strongest candidates”

timhortons

throughout the interview emphasise that youre about progression, that you want more responsibilities than you did at your previous job, tell them the hours here are more suitable for me than my last ones were, AND WHEN IT COMES TO SALARY NEGOTIATION its all about continuity. tell them again that it boils down to progression. make up a reasonable figure for how much you were paid in your last role (do your research for how much the industry youre applying to or the role youre applying for pays, base it on that) tell them you expect more than you were previously paid. do not give them a figure. progression is your primary focus, tell them if youre progressing youre happy. leave it at that.

timhortons

LIE THROUGH YOUR TEETH AND GET THAT MONEY

infiniteglitterfall

I had an interview yesterday, at the place I’ve been temping, where I busted out the “is there anything about my skills or background that makes you concerned about my fit for this job” question for the first time.

Neither of my supervisors had never gotten it before either. They had to think for a while, and then it turned into them telling me how great I am and what they love about me.

This stuff is real. I would also say: none of it is lying. This is taking experience that you normally downplay and write off, and putting it in accurate words they’ll understand.

It’s hacking the capitalist system. Why ISN’T helping a kid with homework “tutoring”, when the only thing missing is a paycheck?

It’s especially important for anyone who isn’t a cis white man, because many of us are so thoroughly trained to feel like we are not good enough.

Privilege tells people they can fake it, and that they’re good enough just as people and can learn the skills on the job. Abuse and oppression tell people they aren’t good enough as people and that even their high skills are probably below average, and that unless they had the specific job title or were using certain skills officially, nobody will think it counts.

The goal is to at least fake the confidence of a privileged person, to give the employer a chance at seeing the skills that you’ve been trained to undervalue.

queenklu

I would also say to answer any query of “Have you done [X small task] before?” with “I have, but it’s been a while.” Or, “I have, but it was a slightly different program.”

100% THEY WILL GLADLY WALK YOU THROUGH EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW, and I stress ‘gladly’ because claiming prior knowledge boosts their confidence in your abilities and any slips you make are already covered by your caveat.

leupagus

blackstoic may have deactivated their account but this advice is fucking gold and all y’all looking for jobs or who think you might one day need to look for a new job PRINT THIS SHIT OUT AND STAPLE IT TO THE WALL.