speak of the devil and he will drive up in an uber

mas 27 about

[gutsandeverythingg]

Who are you and why do i follow you

do i really have to do this every time. you are a mindless ghoul. i own you. you dig my endless pit. BACK TO WORK

[markadoo]

the famous "nonthreatening feminist boy" photograph from 2013 was made entirely practically. The "mirror" effect, which would now be trivial to produce in any photo editor, was achieved by filling the room face-deep with mercury and shackling him to the floor so he didn't float to the surface

[subaru-copilot]

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

[meanbuddhist]

*turns my attention inwards* mmmmm. no *turns my attention back outwards* oh god

[vermilionstarlight]

age regressing to 2 years old but i was an especially erudite and articulate baby so you don't even notice

[rockergiirl]

damn your pussy fat and long and hard and outside

[jester-operation]

I habe some bad news

[rockergiirl]

BOTH TOWERS?

[sapropel]

Someone messaged me to tell me they had small boobs and then blocked me

[threebigolsausages-deactivated2]

I get a strike at the bowling alley and the screen plays a clip of me being born

[zoctopode]

im so used to tumblr that i forgot some troglodytes on reddit wouldnt be even surface level familiar with the concept of the robot lesbian

[zoctopode]

[year2000electronics]

[garaks-padded-cell]

Dogsitter just casually sent me this photo as if it isnt the most insane thing ive ever seen in my fucking life

[garaks-padded-cell]

[halondrus]

[cutecipher]

can you put that thing on a leash?

[halondrus]

ok

[f4therlesssss]

nvm i’ve said too much #unknowme

[fireleaptfromhousetohouse]

[druckers]

i would fuck him [remembers im talking about a real person] um [remembers its normal to be attracted to people] i would fuck him

[skittypilled]

so i put my hands up theyre playing my song the evil skull flies away

[2colde]

they are poisoning us today with a thursday poison little do they know we’ve been through a few thursday poisonings so it won’t kill us just yet