Matt's Tumblr

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

i dont eat celery. TW: Trans Fats

[djpotassium-blog]

ATTENTION EVERYWOMEN:

THIS BLOG NOW SERVES AS A SPIRITUAL SELF-HELP VEGAN DIET BLOG

It will include new never before seen PATRIARCHY-FREE diets and recipes.

If you suffer from self diagnosed (who needs doctors anyways?) OCD, Multiple Personally Disorder, or Autophagia, look no further!

Reminder: this blog is 100% Level 95 Vegan (no animal products or things that even look like animals — including animal crackers, gummy worms, those Easter peeps, asparagus that resembles a snake, a snake that resembles asparagus, etc.).

[djpotassium-blog]

This is the white rose.

It symbolizes the hirsute paroxysm that nice guys like me have towards love.

I believe that, like Fermi’s Paradox, one day I will find someone who appreciates my cheeto-covered neckbeard and my stylish fedora.

[djpotassium-blog]

Um why do you comment about cis scum and feminism so much?? Like wtf?

Thats a good question.

Now I could answer that question like my competitors would, or I could take a step back, rethink the question, add some pizazz and complexity.

To answer your question, let me tell you what I won’t do.

I will not let foreign policy change our education, and I will compound on the values that made my blog great: Honor. Truth. Courage.

As Tumblr-User Representative and Member of the Board of Common Blogs, I can assure you that with my policy and people like you’s support, we can make this blog even better than before.

Thank you and God Bless the Veterans.(I hate Cis Scum)

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

AWOMEN

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

My face when someone says the patriarchy isn’t real

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

PSA

(｡◕‿◕｡) You are all beautiful just the way you are!!! uwu unless you're white cis scum. they ugly

[djpotassium-blog]

are you fucking serious with this shit alex

Are you implying that the 500 + pounds of my HEALTHY body should be stare raped by the patriarchy? Cis scum.

[djpotassium-blog]

Omfg

She didn’t.

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

bb you don’t need her in ur life she aint worth ur time love 

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

Why don't you like toasted pop tarts

im lazy

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

this is a rug. it symbolizes the facT THAT THE PATRIARCHY MADE IT COLORED REPRESENTING PEOPLE OF COLOR BEING STEPPED ON BY SOCIETY

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

UGHH

Omg some people are just Ughh

(btw don't ask who I'm talking about, its a super secret)

(ps. This is where you give me support in my ask box)

[simonteenca]

Raise your hand if your room looks like this!

*raises hand*

Shared from: @WeHeartIt

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

[krikrifreeze-blog]

I STARTED THE MATT’S DAWGS TUMBLR MOVEMENT PLZ KING ME

[juano3o-blog]

imho “King” is a patriarchal word that implies that people in chess shouldn’t be Queens even though it is evident that Queens are superior to kings in every way in the misogynistic game which is chess.

[krikrifreeze-blog]

but this is Sudoku

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

pop-tarts are better when they aren’t toasted.

this is biased. I’ve never had a toasted pop-tart. But I’m not willing to spend the time to toast my pop-tart in order to have a balanced opinion. I don’t care.

[juano3o-blog]

imho toasted pop tarts taste like home. They have a warm and cozy feeling to them like spending a winter night in a cabin in the mountains with bae. They are the embodiment of relaxation and comfort. It is worth the one minute. Just do it ~Nike~

[mattkristoffersen-blog]

pop-tarts are better when they aren’t toasted.

this is biased. I’ve never had a toasted pop-tart. But I’m not willing to spend the time to toast my pop-tart in order to have a balanced opinion. I don’t care.

[mattkristoffersen-blog]