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personal journal of sorts | she/her

[mauvefille]

I come from at least 3 generations of bad mothers, and it feels like all I can do is pray and try to build up the strength to not become the same when I have kids of my own.

[mauvefille]

And I'm crying again but it's not the freeing, loud crying I shared with my boyfriend and his mom, but the choked kind where you're trying to be quiet so no one can hear you

[mauvefille]

So what do you do when it feels like your friends don't care about you anymore

But also thank God nobody actually sees this so it doesn't feel like I'm attention seeking

[mauvefille]

Why is it that I get persecuted for the SMALLEST things while I let people get away with so much more because I'm, y'know, AN ADULT who can let things go?

For example, my suitemate texted our group chat about flushing the toilet (fine, whatever) when I not only have witnessed them doing the same thing and me just flushing it for them (and it wasn't just piss it was also period blood) and didn't complain, but last semester they also puked in the toilet every single morning and flipped out when I told them to clean it. Sorry I don't want puke on the bottom seat of the shared toilet!

Just gonna go descend into madness real quick cuz it seems everyone just wants me to fucking die

Rant over

[mauvefille]

Spring break in 2 days... Life is worth living.

All I gotta do is get through 7 more classes, an essay, and 2 exams!

[mauvefille]

Why are university professors so uptight about you having your phone out during lectures bro. Like what, are my reels gonna distract you or my peers? I don't think so. You don't even know my name, why are you worried about my phone? "It's gonna disrupt your learning!" Fucking so? That's my problem, not yours. Fuck off.

Rant over